- The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde
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- Title: The Picture of Dorian Gray
- Author: Oscar Wilde
- Release Date: October 1, 2008 [EBook #26740]
- Language: English
- *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY ***
- Produced by David Clarke, Chuck Greif and the Online
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- THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY
- BY
- OSCAR WILDE
- LONDON: SIMPKIN, MARSHALL,
- HAMILTON, KENT & CO., LTD.
- PARIS
- ON SALE AT YE OLD PARIS BOOKE SHOPPE
- 11 RUE DE CHÂTEAUDUN
- _Registered at Stationers' Hall and protected
- under the Copyright Law Act.
- First published in complete book form in 1891 by
- Messrs. Ward, Lock & Co. (London),
- First printed in this Edition April 1913,
- Reprinted June 1913, September 1913,
- June 1914, January 1916
- October 1916._
- _See the Bibliographical Note on certain Pirated and Mutilated
- Editions of "Dorian Gray" at the end of this present volume._
- THE PREFACE
- The artist is the creator of beautiful things. To reveal art and conceal
- the artist is art's aim. The critic is he who can translate into another
- manner or a new material his impression of beautiful things.
- The highest, as the lowest, form of criticism is a mode of
- autobiography.
- Those who find ugly meanings in beautiful things are corrupt without
- being charming. This is a fault.
- Those who find beautiful meanings in beautiful things are the
- cultivated. For these there is hope.
- They are the elect to whom beautiful things mean only Beauty.
- There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well
- written, or badly written. That is all.
- The nineteenth century dislike of Realism is the rage of Caliban seeing
- his own face in a glass.
- The nineteenth century dislike of Romanticism is the rage of Caliban not
- seeing his own face in a glass.
- The moral life of man forms part of the subject-matter of the artist,
- but the morality of art consists in the perfect use of an imperfect
- medium. No artist desires to prove anything. Even things that are true
- can be proved.
- No artist has ethical sympathies. An ethical sympathy in an artist is an
- unpardonable mannerism of style.
- No artist is ever morbid. The artist can express everything.
- Thought and language are to the artist instruments of an art.
- Vice and virtue are to the artist materials for an art.
- From the point of view of form, the type of all the arts is the art of
- the musician. From the point of view of feeling, the actor's craft is
- the type.
- All art is at once surface and symbol. Those who go beneath the surface
- do so at their peril.
- Those who read the symbol do so at their peril.
- It is the spectator, and not life, that art really mirrors. Diversity of
- opinion about a work of art shows that the work is new, complex, and
- vital.
- When critics disagree the artist is in accord with himself.
- We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he does not
- admire it. The only excuse for making a useless thing is that one
- admires it intensely.
- All art is quite useless.
- OSCAR WILDE.
- THE PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY
- CHAPTER I
- The studio was filled with the rich odour of roses, and when the light
- summer wind stirred amidst the trees of the garden, there came through
- the open door the heavy scent of the lilac, or the more delicate perfume
- of the pink-flowering thorn.
- From the corner of the divan of Persian saddlebags on which he was
- lying, smoking, as was his custom, innumerable cigarettes, Lord Henry
- Wotton could just catch the gleam of the honey-sweet and honey-coloured
- blossoms of a laburnum, whose tremulous branches seemed hardly able to
- bear the burden of a beauty so flame-like as theirs; and now and then
- the fantastic shadows of birds in flight flitted across the long
- tussore-silk curtains that were stretched in front of the huge window,
- producing a kind of momentary Japanese effect, and making him think of
- those pallid jade-faced painters of Tokio who, through the medium of an
- art that is necessarily immobile, seek to convey the sense of swiftness
- and motion. The sullen murmur of the bees shouldering their way through
- the long unmown grass, or circling with monotonous insistence round the
- dusty gilt horns of the straggling woodbine, seemed to make the
- stillness more oppressive. The dim roar of London was like the bourdon
- note of a distant organ.
- In the centre of the room, clamped to an upright easel, stood the
- full-length portrait of a young man of extraordinary personal beauty,
- and in front of it, some little distance away, was sitting the artist
- himself, Basil Hallward, whose sudden disappearance some years ago
- caused, at the time, such public excitement, and gave rise to so many
- strange conjectures.
- As the painter looked at the gracious and comely form he had so
- skilfully mirrored in his art, a smile of pleasure passed across his
- face, and seemed about to linger there. But he suddenly started up, and,
- closing his eyes, placed his fingers upon the lids, as though he sought
- to imprison within his brain some curious dream from which he feared he
- might awake.
- "It is your best work, Basil, the best thing you have ever done," said
- Lord Henry, languidly. "You must certainly send it next year to the
- Grosvenor. The Academy is too large and too vulgar. Whenever I have gone
- there, there have been either so many people that I have not been able
- to see the pictures, which was dreadful, or so many pictures that I have
- not been able to see the people, which was worse. The Grosvenor is
- really the only place."
- "I don't think I shall send it anywhere," he answered, tossing his head
- back in that odd way that used to make his friends laugh at him at
- Oxford. "No: I won't send it anywhere."
- Lord Henry elevated his eyebrows, and looked at him in amazement through
- the thin blue wreaths of smoke that curled up in such fanciful whorls
- from his heavy opium-tainted cigarette. "Not send it anywhere? My dear
- fellow, why? Have you any reason? What odd chaps you painters are! You
- do anything in the world to gain a reputation. As soon as you have one,
- you seem to want to throw it away. It is silly of you, for there is only
- one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not
- being talked about. A portrait like this would set you far above all the
- young men in England, and make the old men quite jealous, if old men are
- ever capable of any emotion."
- "I know you will laugh at me," he replied, "but I really can't exhibit
- it. I have put too much of myself into it."
- Lord Henry stretched himself out on the divan and laughed.
- "Yes, I knew you would; but it is quite true, all the same."
- "Too much of yourself in it! Upon my word, Basil, I didn't know you were
- so vain; and I really can't see any resemblance between you, with your
- rugged strong face and your coal-black hair, and this young Adonis, who
- looks as if he was made out of ivory and rose-leaves. Why, my dear
- Basil, he is a Narcissus, and you--well, of course you have an
- intellectual expression, and all that. But beauty, real beauty, ends
- where an intellectual expression begins. Intellect is in itself a mode
- of exaggeration, and destroys the harmony of any face. The moment one
- sits down to think, one becomes all nose, or all forehead, or something
- horrid. Look at the successful men in any of the learned professions.
- How perfectly hideous they are! Except, of course, in the Church. But
- then in the Church they don't think. A bishop keeps on saying at the age
- of eighty what he was told to say when he was a boy of eighteen, and as
- a natural consequence he always looks absolutely delightful. Your
- mysterious young friend, whose name you have never told me, but whose
- picture really fascinates me, never thinks. I feel quite sure of that.
- He is some brainless, beautiful creature, who should be always here in
- winter when we have no flowers to look at, and always here in summer
- when we want something to chill our intelligence. Don't flatter
- yourself, Basil: you are not in the least like him."
- "You don't understand me, Harry," answered the artist. "Of course I am
- not like him. I know that perfectly well. Indeed, I should be sorry to
- look like him. You shrug your shoulders? I am telling you the truth.
- There is a fatality about all physical and intellectual distinction, the
- sort of fatality that seems to dog through history the faltering steps
- of kings. It is better not to be different from one's fellows. The ugly
- and the stupid have the best of it in this world. They can sit at their
- ease and gape at the play. If they know nothing of victory, they are at
- least spared the knowledge of defeat. They live as we all should live,
- undisturbed, indifferent, and without disquiet. They neither bring ruin
- upon others, nor ever receive it from alien hands. Your rank and wealth,
- Harry; my brains, such as they are--my art, whatever it may be worth;
- Dorian Gray's good looks--we shall all suffer for what the gods have
- given us, suffer terribly."
- "Dorian Gray? Is that his name?" asked Lord Henry, walking across the
- studio towards Basil Hallward.
- "Yes, that is his name. I didn't intend to tell it to you."
- "But why not?"
- "Oh, I can't explain. When I like people immensely I never tell their
- names to anyone. It is like surrendering a part of them. I have grown to
- love secrecy. It seems to be the one thing that can make modern life
- mysterious or marvellous to us. The commonest thing is delightful if one
- only hides it. When I leave town now I never tell my people where I am
- going. If I did, I would lose all my pleasure. It is a silly habit, I
- daresay, but somehow it seems to bring a great deal of romance into
- one's life. I suppose you think me awfully foolish about it?"
- "Not at all," answered Lord Henry, "not at all, my dear Basil. You seem
- to forget that I am married, and the one charm of marriage is that it
- makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. I
- never know where my wife is, and my wife never knows what I am doing.
- When we meet--we do meet occasionally, when we dine out together, or go
- down to the Duke's--we tell each other the most absurd stories with the
- most serious faces. My wife is very good at it--much better, in fact,
- than I am. She never gets confused over her dates, and I always do. But
- when she does find me out, she makes no row at all. I sometimes wish she
- would; but she merely laughs at me."
- "I hate the way you talk about your married life, Harry," said Basil
- Hallward, strolling towards the door that led into the garden. "I
- believe that you are really a very good husband, but that you are
- thoroughly ashamed of your own virtues. You are an extraordinary fellow.
- You never say a moral thing, and you never do a wrong thing. Your
- cynicism is simply a pose."
- "Being natural is simply a pose, and the most irritating pose I know,"
- cried Lord Henry, laughing; and the two young men went out into the
- garden together, and ensconced themselves on a long bamboo seat that
- stood in the shade of a tall laurel bush. The sunlight slipped over the
- polished leaves. In the grass, white daisies were tremulous.
- After a pause, Lord Henry pulled out his watch. "I am afraid I must be
- going, Basil," he murmured, "and before I go, I insist on your answering
- a question I put to you some time ago."
- "What is that?" said the painter, keeping his eyes fixed on the ground.
- "You know quite well."
- "I do not, Harry."
- "Well, I will tell you what it is. I want you to explain to me why you
- won't exhibit Dorian Gray's picture. I want the real reason."
- "I told you the real reason."
- "No, you did not. You said it was because there was too much of yourself
- in it. Now, that is childish."
- "Harry," said Basil Hallward, looking him straight in the face, "every
- portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not
- of the sitter. The sitter is merely the accident, the occasion. It is
- not he who is revealed by the painter; it is rather the painter who, on
- the coloured canvas, reveals himself. The reason I will not exhibit this
- picture is that I am afraid that I have shown in it the secret of my own
- soul."
- Lord Henry laughed. "And what is that?" he asked.
- "I will tell you," said Hallward; but an expression of perplexity came
- over his face.
- "I am all expectation, Basil," continued his companion, glancing at him.
- "Oh, there is really very little to tell, Harry," answered the painter;
- "and I am afraid you will hardly understand it. Perhaps you will hardly
- believe it."
- Lord Henry smiled, and, leaning down, plucked a pink-petalled daisy from
- the grass, and examined it. "I am quite sure I shall understand it," he
- replied, gazing intently at the little golden white-feathered disk, "and
- as for believing things, I can believe anything, provided that it is
- quite incredible."
- The wind shook some blossoms from the trees, and the heavy lilac-blooms,
- with their clustering stars, moved to and fro in the languid air. A
- grasshopper began to chirrup by the wall, and like a blue thread a long
- thin dragon-fly floated past on its brown gauze wings. Lord Henry felt
- as if he could hear Basil Hallward's heart beating, and wondered what
- was coming.
- "The story is simply this," said the painter after some time. "Two
- months ago I went to a crush at Lady Brandon's. You know we poor artists
- have to show ourselves in society from time to time, just to remind the
- public that we are not savages. With an evening coat and a white tie, as
- you told me once, anybody, even a stockbroker, can gain a reputation for
- being civilised. Well, after I had been in the room about ten minutes,
- talking to huge over-dressed dowagers and tedious Academicians, I
- suddenly became conscious that someone was looking at me. I turned
- halfway round, and saw Dorian Gray for the first time. When our eyes
- met, I felt that I was growing pale. A curious sensation of terror came
- over me. I knew that I had come face to face with someone whose mere
- personality was so fascinating that, if I allowed it to do so, it would
- absorb my whole nature, my whole soul, my very art itself. I did not
- want any external influence in my life. You know yourself, Harry, how
- independent I am by nature. I have always been my own master; had at
- least always been so, till I met Dorian Gray. Then---- but I don't know
- how to explain it to you. Something seemed to tell me that I was on the
- verge of a terrible crisis in my life. I had a strange feeling that Fate
- had in store for me exquisite joys and exquisite sorrows. I grew afraid,
- and turned to quit the room. It was not conscience that made me do so;
- it was a sort of cowardice. I take no credit to myself for trying to
- escape."
- "Conscience and cowardice are really the same things, Basil. Conscience
- is the trade-name of the firm. That is all."
- "I don't believe that, Harry, and I don't believe you do either.
- However, whatever was my motive--and it may have been pride, for I used
- to be very proud--I certainly struggled to the door. There, of course, I
- stumbled against Lady Brandon. 'You are not going to run away so soon,
- Mr. Hallward?' she screamed out. You know her curiously shrill voice?"
- "Yes; she is a peacock in everything but beauty," said Lord Henry,
- pulling the daisy to bits with his long, nervous fingers.
- "I could not get rid of her. She brought me up to Royalties, and people
- with Stars and Garters, and elderly ladles with gigantic tiaras and
- parrot noses. She spoke of me as her dearest friend. I had only met her
- once before, but she took it into her head to lionise me. I believe some
- picture of mine had made a great success at the time, at least had been
- chattered about in the penny newspapers, which is the nineteenth-century
- standard of immortality. Suddenly I found myself face to face with the
- young man whose personality had so strangely stirred me. We were quite
- close, almost touching. Our eyes met again. It was reckless of me, but I
- asked Lady Brandon to introduce me to him. Perhaps it was not so
- reckless, after all. It was simply inevitable. We would have spoken to
- each other without any introduction. I am sure of that. Dorian told me
- so afterwards. He, too, felt that we were destined to know each other."
- "And how did Lady Brandon describe this wonderful young man?" asked his
- companion. "I know she goes in for giving a rapid _précis_ of all her
- guests. I remember her bringing me up to a truculent and red-faced old
- gentleman covered all over with orders and ribbons, and hissing into my
- ear, in a tragic whisper which must have been perfectly audible to
- everybody in the room, the most astounding details. I simply fled. I
- like to find out people for myself. But Lady Brandon treats her guests
- exactly as an auctioneer treats his goods. She either explains them
- entirely away, or tells one everything about them except what one wants
- to know."
- "Poor Lady Brandon! You are hard on her, Harry!" said Hallward,
- listlessly.
- "My dear fellow, she tried to found a _salon_, and only succeeded in
- opening a restaurant. How could I admire her? But tell me, what did she
- say about Mr. Dorian Gray?"
- "Oh, something like, 'Charming boy--poor dear mother and I absolutely
- inseparable. Quite forget what he does--afraid he--doesn't do
- anything--oh, yes, plays the piano--or is it the violin, dear Mr. Gray?'
- Neither of us could help laughing, and we became friends at once."
- "Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far
- the best ending for one," said the young lord, plucking another daisy.
- Hallward shook his head. "You don't understand what friendship is,
- Harry," he murmured--"or what enmity is, for that matter. You like
- everyone; that is to say, you are indifferent to everyone."
- "How horribly unjust of you!" cried Lord Henry, tilting his hat back,
- and looking up at the little clouds that, like ravelled skeins of glossy
- white silk, were drifting across the hollowed turquoise of the summer
- sky. "Yes; horribly unjust of you. I make a great difference between
- people. I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for
- their good characters, and my enemies for their good intellects. A man
- cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. I have not got one
- who is a fool. They are all men of some intellectual power, and
- consequently they all appreciate me. Is that very vain of me? I think it
- is rather vain."
- "I should think it was, Harry. But according to your category I must be
- merely an acquaintance."
- "My dear old Basil, you are much more than an acquaintance."
- "And much less than a friend. A sort of brother, I suppose?"
- "Oh, brothers! I don't care for brothers. My elder brother won't die,
- and my younger brothers seem never to do anything else."
- "Harry!" exclaimed Hallward, frowning.
- "My dear fellow, I am not quite serious. But I can't help detesting my
- relations. I suppose it comes from the fact that none of us can stand
- other people having the same faults as ourselves. I quite sympathise
- with the rage of the English democracy against what they call the vices
- of the upper orders. The masses feel that drunkenness, stupidity, and
- immorality should be their own special property, and that if anyone of
- us makes an ass of himself he is poaching on their preserves. When poor
- Southwark got into the Divorce Court, their indignation was quite
- magnificent. And yet I don't suppose that ten per cent. of the
- proletariat live correctly."
- "I don't agree with a single word that you have said, and, what is more,
- Harry, I feel sure you don't either."
- Lord Henry stroked his pointed brown beard, and tapped the toe of his
- patent-leather boot with a tasselled ebony cane. "How English you are,
- Basil! That is the second time you have made that observation. If one
- puts forward an idea to a true Englishman--always a rash thing to do--he
- never dreams of considering whether the idea is right or wrong. The only
- thing he considers of any importance is whether one believes it oneself.
- Now, the value of an idea has nothing whatsoever to do with the
- sincerity of the man who expresses it. Indeed, the probabilities are
- that the more insincere the man is, the more purely intellectual will
- the idea be, as in that case it will not be coloured by either his
- wants, his desires, or his prejudices. However, I don't propose to
- discuss politics, sociology, or metaphysics with you. I like persons
- better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better
- than anything else in the world. Tell me more about Mr. Dorian Gray. How
- often do you see him?"
- "Every day. I couldn't be happy if I didn't see him every day. He is
- absolutely necessary to me."
- "How extraordinary! I thought you would never care for anything but your
- art."
- "He is all my art to me now," said the painter, gravely. "I sometimes
- think, Harry, that there are only two eras of any importance in the
- world's history. The first is the appearance of a new medium for art,
- and the second is the appearance of a new personality for art also. What
- the invention of oil-painting was to the Venetians, the face of Antinoüs
- was to late Greek sculpture, and the face of Dorian Gray will some day
- be to me. It is not merely that I paint from him, draw from him, sketch
- from him. Of course I have done all that. But he is much more to me
- than a model or a sitter. I won't tell you that I am dissatisfied with
- what I have done of him, or that his beauty is such that Art cannot
- express it. There is nothing that Art cannot express, and I know that
- the work I have done, since I met Dorian Gray, is good work, is the best
- work of my life. But in some curious way--I wonder will you understand
- me?--his personality has suggested to me an entirely new manner in art,
- an entirely new mode of style. I see things differently, I think of them
- differently. I can now recreate life in a way that was hidden from me,
- before. 'A dream of form in days of thought:'--who is it who says that?
- I forget; but it is what Dorian Gray has been to me. The merely visible
- presence of this lad--for he seems to me little more than a lad, though
- he is really over twenty--his merely visible presence--ah! I wonder can
- you realise all that that means? Unconsciously he defines for me the
- lines of a fresh school, a school that is to have in it all the passion
- of the romantic spirit, all the perfection of the spirit that is Greek.
- The harmony of soul and body--how much that is! We in our madness have
- separated the two, and have invented a realism that is vulgar, an
- ideality that is void. Harry! if you only knew what Dorian Gray is to
- me! You remember that landscape of mine, for which Agnew offered me such
- a huge price, but which I would not part with? It is one of the best
- things I have ever done. And why is it so? Because, while I was painting
- it, Dorian Gray sat beside me. Some subtle influence passed from him to
- me, and for the first time in my life I saw in the plain woodland the
- wonder I had always looked for, and always missed."
- "Basil, this is extraordinary! I must see Dorian Gray."
- Hallward got up from the seat, and walked up and down the garden. After
- some time he came back. "Harry," he said, "Dorian Gray is to me simply
- a motive in art. You might see nothing in him. I see everything in him.
- He is never more present in my work than when no image of him is there.
- He is a suggestion, as I have said, of a new manner. I find him in the
- curves of certain lines, in the loveliness and subtleties of certain
- colours. That is all."
- "Then why won't you exhibit his portrait?" asked Lord Henry.
- "Because, without intending it, I have put into it some expression of
- all this curious artistic idolatry, of which, of course, I have never
- cared to speak to him. He knows nothing about it. He shall never know
- anything about it. But the world might guess it; and I will not bare my
- soul to their shallow prying eyes. My heart shall never be put under
- their microscope. There is too much of myself in the thing, Harry--too
- much of myself!"
- "Poets are not so scrupulous as you are. They know how useful passion is
- for publication. Nowadays a broken heart will run to many editions."
- "I hate them for it," cried Hallward. "An artist should create beautiful
- things, but should put nothing of his own life into them. We live in an
- age when men treat art as if it were meant to be a form of
- autobiography. We have lost the abstract sense of beauty. Some day I
- will show the world what it is; and for that reason the world shall
- never see my portrait of Dorian Gray."
- "I think you are wrong, Basil, but I won't argue with you. It is only
- the intellectually lost who ever argue. Tell me, is Dorian Gray very
- fond of you?"
- The painter considered for a few moments. "He likes me," he answered,
- after a pause; "I know he likes me. Of course I flatter him dreadfully.
- I find a strange pleasure in saying things to him that I know I shall be
- sorry for having said. As a rule, he is charming to me, and we sit in
- the studio and talk of a thousand things. Now and then, however, he is
- horribly thoughtless, and seems to take a real delight in giving me
- pain. Then I feel, Harry, that I have given away my whole soul to
- someone who treats it as if it were a flower to put in his coat, a bit
- of decoration to charm his vanity, an ornament for a summer's day."
- "Days in summer, Basil, are apt to linger," murmured Lord Henry.
- "Perhaps you will tire sooner than he will. It is a sad thing to think
- of, but there is no doubt that Genius lasts longer than Beauty. That
- accounts for the fact that we all take such pains to over-educate
- ourselves. In the wild struggle for existence, we want to have something
- that endures, and so we fill our minds with rubbish and facts, in the
- silly hope of keeping our place. The thoroughly well-informed man--that
- is the modern ideal. And the mind of the thoroughly well-informed man is
- a dreadful thing. It is like a bric-à-brac shop, all monsters and dust,
- with everything priced above its proper value. I think you will tire
- first, all the same. Some day you will look at your friend, and he will
- seem to you to be a little out of drawing, or you won't like his tone of
- colour, or something. You will bitterly reproach him in your own heart,
- and seriously think that he has behaved very badly to you. The next time
- he calls, you will be perfectly cold and indifferent. It will be a great
- pity, for it will alter you. What you have told me is quite a romance, a
- romance of art one might call it, and the worst of having a romance of
- any kind is that it leaves one so unromantic."
- "Harry, don't talk like that. As long as I live, the personality of
- Dorian Gray will dominate me. You can't feel what I feel. You change too
- often."
- "Ah, my dear Basil, that is exactly why I can feel it. Those who are
- faithful know only the trivial side of love: it is the faithless who
- know love's tragedies." And Lord Henry struck a light on a dainty silver
- case, and began to smoke a cigarette with a self-conscious and satisfied
- air, as if he had summed up the world in a phrase. There was a rustle of
- chirruping sparrows in the green lacquer leaves of the ivy, and the
- blue cloud-shadows chased themselves across the grass like swallows. How
- pleasant it was in the garden! And how delightful other people's
- emotions were!--much more delightful than their ideas, it seemed to him.
- One's own soul, and the passions of one's friends--those were the
- fascinating things in life. He pictured to himself with silent amusement
- the tedious luncheon that he had missed by staying so long with Basil
- Hallward. Had he gone to his aunt's he would have been sure to have met
- Lord Goodbody there, and the whole conversation would have been about
- the feeding of the poor, and the necessity for model lodging-houses.
- Each class would have preached the importance of those virtues, for
- whose exercise there was no necessity in their own lives. The rich would
- have spoken on the value of thrift, and the idle grown eloquent over the
- dignity of labour. It was charming to have escaped all that! As he
- thought of his aunt, an idea seemed to strike him. He turned to
- Hallward, and said, "My dear fellow, I have just remembered."
- "Remembered what, Harry?"
- "Where I heard the name of Dorian Gray."
- "Where was it?" asked Hallward, with a slight frown.
- "Don't look so angry, Basil. It was at my aunt, Lady Agatha's. She told
- me she had discovered a wonderful young man, who was going to help her
- in the East End, and that his name was Dorian Gray. I am bound to state
- that she never told me he was good-looking. Women have no appreciation
- of good looks; at least, good women have not. She said that he was very
- earnest, and had a beautiful nature. I at once pictured to myself a
- creature with spectacles and lank hair, horribly freckled, and tramping
- about on huge feet. I wish I had known it was your friend."
- "I am very glad you didn't, Harry."
- "Why?"
- "I don't want you to meet him."
- "You don't want me to meet him?"
- "No."
- "Mr. Dorian Gray is in the studio, sir," said the butler, coming into
- the garden.
- "You must introduce me now," cried Lord Henry, laughing.
- The painter turned to his servant, who stood blinking in the sunlight.
- "Ask Mr. Gray to wait, Parker: I shall be in in a few moments." The man
- bowed, and went up the walk.
- Then he looked at Lord Henry. "Dorian Gray is my dearest friend," he
- said. "He has a simple and a beautiful nature. Your aunt was quite right
- in what she said of him. Don't spoil him. Don't try to influence him.
- Your influence would be bad. The world is wide, and has many marvellous
- people in it. Don't take away from me the one person who gives to my art
- whatever charm it possesses; my life as an artist depends on him. Mind,
- Harry, I trust you." He spoke very slowly, and the words seemed wrung
- out of him almost against his will.
- "What nonsense you talk!" said Lord Henry, smiling, and, taking Hallward
- by the arm, he almost led him into the house.
- CHAPTER II
- As they entered they saw Dorian Gray. He was seated at the piano, with
- his back to them, turning over the pages of a volume of Schumann's
- "Forest Scenes." "You must lend me these, Basil," he cried. "I want to
- learn them. They are perfectly charming."
- "That entirely depends on how you sit to-day, Dorian."
- "Oh, I am tired of sitting, and I don't want a life-sized portrait of
- myself," answered the lad, swinging round on the music-stool, in a
- wilful, petulant manner. When he caught sight of Lord Henry, a faint
- blush coloured his cheeks for a moment, and he started up. "I beg your
- pardon, Basil, but I didn't know you had anyone with you."
- "This is Lord Henry Wotton, Dorian, an old Oxford friend of mine. I have
- just been telling him what a capital sitter you were, and now you have
- spoiled everything."
- "You have not spoiled my pleasure in meeting you, Mr. Gray," said Lord
- Henry, stepping forward and extending his hand. "My aunt has often
- spoken to me about you. You are one of her favourites, and, I am afraid,
- one of her victims also."
- "I am in Lady Agatha's black books at present," answered Dorian, with a
- funny look of penitence. "I promised to go to a club in Whitechapel with
- her last Tuesday, and I really forgot all about it. We were to have
- played a duet together--three duets, I believe. I don't know what she
- will say to me. I am far too frightened to call."
- "Oh, I will make your peace with my aunt. She is quite devoted to you.
- And I don't think it really matters about your not being there. The
- audience probably thought it was a duet. When Aunt Agatha sits down to
- the piano she makes quite enough noise for two people."
- "That is very horrid to her, and not very nice to me," answered Dorian,
- laughing.
- Lord Henry looked at him. Yes, he was certainly wonderfully handsome,
- with his finely-curved scarlet lips, his frank blue eyes, his crisp gold
- hair. There was something in his face that made one trust him at once.
- All the candour of youth was there, as well as all youth's passionate
- purity. One felt that he had kept himself unspotted from the world. No
- wonder Basil Hallward worshipped him.
- "You are too charming to go in for philanthropy, Mr. Gray--far too
- charming." And Lord Henry flung himself down on the divan, and opened
- his cigarette-case.
- The painter had been busy mixing his colours and getting his brushes
- ready. He was looking worried, and when he heard Lord Henry's last
- remark he glanced at him, hesitated for a moment, and then said, "Harry,
- I want to finish this picture to-day. Would you think it awfully rude of
- me if I asked you to go away?"
- Lord Henry smiled, and looked at Dorian Gray. "Am I to go, Mr. Gray?" he
- asked.
- "Oh, please don't, Lord Henry. I see that Basil is in one of his sulky
- moods; and I can't bear him when he sulks. Besides, I want you to tell
- me why I should not go in for philanthropy."
- "I don't know that I shall tell you that, Mr. Gray. It is so tedious a
- subject that one would have to talk seriously about it. But I certainly
- shall not run away, now that you have asked me to stop. You don't really
- mind, Basil, do you? You have often told me that you liked your sitters
- to have someone to chat to."
- Hallward bit his lip. "If Dorian wishes it, of course you must stay.
- Dorian's whims are laws to everybody, except himself."
- Lord Henry took up his hat and gloves. "You are very pressing, Basil,
- but I am afraid I must go. I have promised to meet a man at the Orleans.
- Good-bye, Mr. Gray. Come and see me some afternoon in Curzon Street. I
- am nearly always at home at five o'clock. Write to me when you are
- coming. I should be sorry to miss you."
- "Basil," cried Dorian Gray, "if Lord Henry Wotton goes I shall go too.
- You never open your lips while you are painting, and it is horribly dull
- standing on a platform and trying to look pleasant. Ask him to stay. I
- insist upon it."
- "Stay, Harry, to oblige Dorian, and to oblige me," said Hallward, gazing
- intently at his picture. "It is quite true, I never talk when I am
- working, and never listen either, and it must be dreadfully tedious for
- my unfortunate sitters. I beg you to stay."
- "But what about my man at the Orleans?"
- The painter laughed. "I don't think there will be any difficulty about
- that. Sit down again, Harry. And now, Dorian, get up on the platform,
- and don't move about too much, or pay any attention to what Lord Henry
- says. He has a very bad influence over all his friends, with the single
- exception of myself."
- Dorian Gray stepped up on the dais, with the air of a young Greek
- martyr, and made a little _moue_ of discontent to Lord Henry, to whom he
- had rather taken a fancy. He was so unlike Basil. They made a delightful
- contrast. And he had such a beautiful voice. After a few moments he said
- to him, "Have you really a very bad influence, Lord Henry? As bad as
- Basil says?"
- "There is no such thing as a good influence, Mr. Gray. All influence is
- immoral--immoral from the scientific point of view."
- "Why?"
- "Because to influence a person is to give him one's own soul. He does
- not think his natural thoughts, or burn with his natural passions. His
- virtues are not real to him. His sins, if there are such things as sins,
- are borrowed. He becomes an echo of someone else's music, an actor of a
- part that has not been written for him. The aim of life is
- self-development. To realise one's nature perfectly--that is what each
- of us is here for. People are afraid of themselves, nowadays. They have
- forgotten the highest of all duties, the duty that one owes to one's
- self. Of course they are charitable. They feed the hungry, and clothe
- the beggar. But their own souls starve, and are naked. Courage has gone
- out of our race. Perhaps we never really had it. The terror of society,
- which is the basis of morals, the terror of God, which is the secret of
- religion--these are the two things that govern us. And yet----"
- "Just turn your head a little more to the right, Dorian, like a good
- boy," said the painter, deep in his work, and conscious only that a look
- had come into the lad's face that he had never seen there before.
- "And yet," continued Lord Henry, in his low, musical voice, and with
- that graceful wave of the hand that was always so characteristic of him,
- and that he had even in his Eton days, "I believe that if one man were
- to live out his life fully and completely, were to give form to every
- feeling, expression to every thought, reality to every dream--I believe
- that the world would gain such a fresh impulse of joy that we would
- forget all the maladies of mediævalism, and return to the Hellenic
- ideal--to something finer, richer, than the Hellenic ideal, it may be.
- But the bravest man amongst us is afraid of himself. The mutilation of
- the savage has its tragic survival in the self-denial that mars our
- lives. We are punished for our refusals. Every impulse that we strive to
- strangle broods in the mind, and poisons us. The body sins once, and has
- done with its sin, for action is a mode of purification. Nothing remains
- then but the recollection of a pleasure, or the luxury of a regret. The
- only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Resist it, and
- your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to
- itself, with desire for what its monstrous laws have made monstrous and
- unlawful. It has been said that the great events of the world take place
- in the brain. It is in the brain, and the brain only, that the great
- sins of the world take place also. You, Mr. Gray, you yourself, with
- your rose-red youth and your rose-white boyhood, you have had passions
- that have made you afraid, thoughts that have filled you with terror,
- day-dreams and sleeping dreams whose mere memory might stain your cheek
- with shame----"
- "Stop!" faltered Dorian Gray, "stop! you bewilder me. I don't know what
- to say. There is some answer to you, but I cannot find it. Don't speak.
- Let me think. Or, rather, let me try not to think."
- For nearly ten minutes he stood there, motionless, with parted lips, and
- eyes strangely bright. He was dimly conscious that entirely fresh
- influences were at work within him. Yet they seemed to him to have come
- really from himself. The few words that Basil's friend had said to
- him--words spoken by chance, no doubt, and with wilful paradox in
- them--had touched some secret chord that had never been touched before,
- but that he felt was now vibrating and throbbing to curious pulses.
- Music had stirred him like that. Music had troubled him many times. But
- music was not articulate. It was not a new world, but rather another
- chaos, that it created in us. Words! Mere words! How terrible they were!
- How clear, and vivid, and cruel! One could not escape from them. And yet
- what a subtle magic there was in them! They seemed to be able to give a
- plastic form to formless things, and to have a music of their own as
- sweet as that of viol or of lute. Mere words! Was there anything so real
- as words?
- Yes; there had been things in his boyhood that he had not understood.
- He understood them now. Life suddenly became fiery-coloured to him. It
- seemed to him that he had been walking in fire. Why had he not known it?
- With his subtle smile, Lord Henry watched him. He knew the precise
- psychological moment when to say nothing. He felt intensely interested.
- He was amazed at the sudden impression that his words had produced, and,
- remembering a book that he had read when he was sixteen, a book which
- had revealed to him much that he had not known before, he wondered
- whether Dorian Gray was passing through a similar experience. He had
- merely shot an arrow into the air. Had it hit the mark? How fascinating
- the lad was!
- Hallward painted away with that marvellous bold touch of his, that had
- the true refinement and perfect delicacy that in art, at any rate, comes
- only from strength. He was unconscious of the silence.
- "Basil, I am tired of standing," cried Dorian Gray, suddenly. "I must go
- out and sit in the garden. The air is stifling here."
- "My dear fellow, I am so sorry. When I am painting, I can't think of
- anything else. But you never sat better. You were perfectly still. And I
- have caught the effect I wanted--the half-parted lips, and the bright
- look in the eyes. I don't know what Harry has been saying to you, but he
- has certainly made you have the most wonderful expression. I suppose he
- has been paying you compliments. You mustn't believe a word that he
- says."
- "He has certainly not been paying me compliments. Perhaps that is the
- reason that I don't believe anything he has told me."
- "You know you believe it all," said Lord Henry, looking at him with his
- dreamy, languorous eyes. "I will go out to the garden with you. It is
- horribly hot in the studio. Basil, let us have something iced to drink,
- something with strawberries in it."
- "Certainly, Harry. Just touch the bell, and when Parker comes I will
- tell him what you want. I have got to work up this background, so I
- will join you later on. Don't keep Dorian too long. I have never been in
- better form for painting than I am to-day. This is going to be my
- masterpiece. It is my masterpiece as it stands."
- Lord Henry went out to the garden, and found Dorian Gray burying his
- face in the great cool lilac-blossoms, feverishly drinking in their
- perfume as if it had been wine. He came close to him, and put his hand
- upon his shoulder. "You are quite right to do that," he murmured.
- "Nothing can cure the soul but the senses, just as nothing can cure the
- senses but the soul."
- The lad started and drew back. He was bareheaded, and the leaves had
- tossed his rebellious curls and tangled all their gilded threads. There
- was a look of fear in his eyes, such as people have when they are
- suddenly awakened. His finely-chiselled nostrils quivered, and some
- hidden nerve shook the scarlet of his lips and left them trembling.
- "Yes," continued Lord Henry, "that is one of the great secrets of
- life--to cure the soul by means of the senses, and the senses by means
- of the soul. You are a wonderful creation. You know more than you think
- you know, just as you know less than you want to know."
- Dorian Gray frowned and turned his head away. He could not help liking
- the tall, graceful young man who was standing by him. His romantic
- olive-coloured face and worn expression interested him. There was
- something in his low, languid voice that was absolutely fascinating. His
- cool, white, flower-like hands, even, had a curious charm. They moved,
- as he spoke, like music, and seemed to have a language of their own. But
- he felt afraid of him, and ashamed of being afraid. Why had it been left
- for a stranger to reveal him to himself? He had known Basil Hallward for
- months, but the friendship between them had never altered him. Suddenly
- there had come someone across his life who seemed to have disclosed to
- him life's mystery. And, yet, what was there to be afraid of? He was not
- a schoolboy or a girl. It was absurd to be frightened.
- "Let us go and sit in the shade," said Lord Henry. "Parker has brought
- out the drinks, and if you stay any longer in this glare you will be
- quite spoiled, and Basil will never paint you again. You really must not
- allow yourself to become sunburnt. It would be unbecoming."
- "What can it matter?" cried Dorian Gray, laughing, as he sat down on the
- seat at the end of the garden.
- "It should matter everything to you, Mr. Gray."
- "Why?"
- "Because you have the most marvellous youth, and youth is the one thing
- worth having."
- "I don't feel that, Lord Henry."
- "No, you don't feel it now. Some day, when you are old and wrinkled and
- ugly, when thought has seared your forehead with its lines, and passion
- branded your lips with its hideous fires, you will feel it, you will
- feel it terribly. Now, wherever you go, you charm the world. Will it
- always be so?... You have a wonderfully beautiful face, Mr. Gray. Don't
- frown. You have. And Beauty is a form of Genius--is higher, indeed, than
- Genius, as it needs no explanation. It is of the great facts of the
- world, like sunlight, or spring-time, or the reflection in dark waters
- of that silver shell we call the moon. It cannot be questioned. It has
- its divine right of sovereignty. It makes princes of those who have it.
- You smile? Ah! when you have lost it you won't smile.... People say
- sometimes that Beauty is only superficial. That may be so. But at least
- it is not so superficial as Thought is. To me, Beauty is the wonder of
- wonders. It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. The
- true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.... Yes, Mr.
- Gray, the gods have been good to you. But what the gods give they
- quickly take away. You have only a few years in which to live really,
- perfectly, and fully. When your youth goes, your beauty will go with it,
- and then you will suddenly discover that there are no triumphs left for
- you, or have to content yourself with those mean triumphs that the
- memory of your past will make more bitter than defeats. Every month as
- it wanes brings you nearer to something dreadful. Time is jealous of
- you, and wars against your lilies and your roses. You will become
- sallow, and hollow-cheeked, and dull-eyed. You will suffer horribly....
- Ah! realise your youth while you have it. Don't squander the gold of
- your days, listening to the tedious, trying to improve the hopeless
- failure, or giving away your life to the ignorant, the common, and the
- vulgar. These are the sickly aims, the false ideals, of our age. Live!
- Live the wonderful life that is in you! Let nothing be lost upon you. Be
- always searching for new sensations. Be afraid of nothing.... A new
- Hedonism--that is what our century wants. You might be its visible
- symbol. With your personality there is nothing you could not do. The
- world belongs to you for a season.... The moment I met you I saw that
- you were quite unconscious of what you really are, of what you really
- might be. There was so much in you that charmed me that I felt I must
- tell you something about yourself. I thought how tragic it would be if
- you were wasted. For there is such a little time that your youth will
- last--such a little time. The common hill-flowers wither, but they
- blossom again. The laburnum will be as yellow next June as it is now. In
- a month there will be purple stars on the clematis, and year after year
- the green night of its leaves will hold its purple stars. But we never
- get back our youth. The pulse of joy that beats in us at twenty, becomes
- sluggish. Our limbs fail, our senses rot. We degenerate into hideous
- puppets, haunted by the memory of the passions of which we were too much
- afraid, and the exquisite temptations that we had not the courage to
- yield to. Youth! Youth! There is absolutely nothing in the world but
- youth!"
- Dorian Gray listened, open-eyed and wondering. The spray of lilac fell
- from his hand upon the gravel. A furry bee came and buzzed round it for
- a moment. Then it began to scramble all over the oval stellated globe of
- the tiny blossoms. He watched it with that strange interest in trivial
- things that we try to develop when things of high import make us afraid,
- or when we are stirred by some new emotion for which we cannot find
- expression, or when some thought that terrifies us lays sudden siege to
- the brain and calls on us to yield. After a time the bee flew away. He
- saw it creeping into the stained trumpet of a Tyrian convolvulus. The
- flower seemed to quiver, and then swayed gently to and fro.
- Suddenly the painter appeared at the door of the studio, and made
- staccato signs for them to come in. They turned to each other, and
- smiled.
- "I am waiting," he cried. "Do come in. The light is quite perfect, and
- you can bring your drinks."
- They rose up, and sauntered down the walk together. Two green-and-white
- butterflies fluttered past them, and in the pear-tree at the corner of
- the garden a thrush began to sing.
- "You are glad you have met me, Mr. Gray," said Lord Henry, looking at
- him.
- "Yes, I am glad now. I wonder shall I always be glad?"
- "Always! That is a dreadful word. It makes me shudder when I hear it.
- Women are so fond of using it. They spoil every romance by trying to
- make it last for ever. It is a meaningless word, too. The only
- difference between a caprice and a life-long passion is that the caprice
- lasts a little longer."
- As they entered the studio, Dorian Gray put his hand upon Lord Henry's
- arm. "In that case, let our friendship be a caprice," he murmured,
- flushing at his own boldness, then stepped up on the platform and
- resumed his pose.
- Lord Henry flung himself into a large wicker arm-chair and watched him.
- The sweep and dash of the brush on the canvas made the only sound that
- broke the stillness, except when, now and then, Hallward stepped back to
- look at his work from a distance. In the slanting beams that streamed
- through the open doorway the dust danced and was golden. The heavy scent
- of the roses seemed to brood over everything.
- After about a quarter of an hour Hallward stopped painting, looked for a
- long time at Dorian Gray, and then for a long time at the picture,
- biting the end of one of his huge brushes, and frowning. "It is quite
- finished," he cried at last, and stooping down he wrote his name in long
- vermilion letters on the left-hand corner of the canvas.
- Lord Henry came over and examined the picture. It was certainly a
- wonderful work of art, and a wonderful likeness as well.
- "My dear fellow, I congratulate you most warmly," he said. "It is the
- finest portrait of modern times. Mr. Gray, come over and look at
- yourself."
- The lad started, as if awakened from some dream. "Is it really
- finished?" he murmured, stepping down from the platform.
- "Quite finished," said the painter. "And you have sat splendidly to-day.
- I am awfully obliged to you."
- "That is entirely due to me," broke in Lord Henry. "Isn't it, Mr. Gray?"
- Dorian made no answer, but passed listlessly in front of his picture,
- and turned towards it. When he saw it he drew back, and his cheeks
- flushed for a moment with pleasure. A look of joy came into his eyes, as
- if he had recognised himself for the first time. He stood there
- motionless and in wonder, dimly conscious that Hallward was speaking to
- him, but not catching the meaning of his words. The sense of his own
- beauty came on him like a revelation. He had never felt it before. Basil
- Hallward's compliments had seemed to him to be merely the charming
- exaggerations of friendship. He had listened to them, laughed at them,
- forgotten them. They had not influenced his nature. Then had come Lord
- Henry Wotton with his strange panegyric on youth, his terrible warning
- of its brevity. That had stirred him at the time, and now, as he stood
- gazing at the shadow of his own loveliness, the full reality of the
- description flashed across him. Yes, there would be a day when his face
- would be wrinkled and wizen, his eyes dim and colourless, the grace of
- his figure broken and deformed. The scarlet would pass away from his
- lips, and the gold steal from his hair. The life that was to make his
- soul would mar his body. He would become dreadful, hideous, and uncouth.
- As he thought of it, a sharp pang of pain struck through him like a
- knife, and made each delicate fibre of his nature quiver. His eyes
- deepened into amethyst, and across them came a mist of tears. He felt as
- if a hand of ice had been laid upon his heart.
- "Don't you like it?" cried Hallward at last, stung a little by the lad's
- silence, not understanding what it meant.
- "Of course he likes it," said Lord Henry. "Who wouldn't like it? It is
- one of the greatest things in modern art. I will give you anything you
- like to ask for it. I must have it."
- "It is not my property, Harry."
- "Whose property is it?"
- "Dorian's, of course," answered the painter.
- "He is a very lucky fellow."
- "How sad it is!" murmured Dorian Gray, with his eyes still fixed upon
- his own portrait. "How sad it is! I shall grow old, and horrible, and
- dreadful. But this picture will remain always young. It will never be
- older than this particular day of June.... If it were only the other
- way! If it were I who was to be always young, and the picture that was
- to grow old! For that--for that--I would give everything! Yes, there is
- nothing in the whole world I would not give! I would give my soul for
- that!"
- "You would hardly care for such an arrangement, Basil," cried Lord
- Henry, laughing. "It would be rather hard lines on your work."
- "I should object very strongly, Harry," said Hallward.
- Dorian Gray turned and looked at him. "I believe you would, Basil. You
- like your art better than your friends. I am no more to you than a green
- bronze figure. Hardly as much, I daresay."
- The painter stared in amazement. It was so unlike Dorian to speak like
- that. What had happened? He seemed quite angry. His face was flushed and
- his cheeks burning.
- "Yes," he continued, "I am less to you than your ivory Hermes or your
- silver Faun. You will like them always. How long will you like me? Till
- I have my first wrinkle, I suppose. I know, now, that when one loses
- one's good looks, whatever they may be, one loses everything. Your
- picture has taught me that. Lord Henry Wotton is perfectly right. Youth
- is the only thing worth having. When I find that I am growing old, I
- shall kill myself."
- Hallward turned pale, and caught his hand. "Dorian! Dorian!" he cried,
- "don't talk like that. I have never had such a friend as you, and I
- shall never have such another. You are not jealous of material things,
- are you?--you who are finer than any of them!"
- "I am jealous of everything whose beauty does not die. I am jealous of
- the portrait you have painted of me. Why should it keep what I must
- lose? Every moment that passes takes something from me, and gives
- something to it. Oh, if it were only the other way! If the picture could
- change, and I could be always what I am now! Why did you paint it? It
- will mock me some day--mock me horribly!" The hot tears welled into his
- eyes; he tore his hand away, and, flinging himself on the divan, he
- buried his face in the cushions, as though he was praying.
- "This is your doing, Harry," said the painter, bitterly.
- Lord Henry shrugged his shoulders. "It is the real Dorian Gray--that is
- all."
- "It is not."
- "If it is not, what have I to do with it?"
- "You should have gone away when I asked you," he muttered.
- "I stayed when you asked me," was Lord Henry's answer.
- "Harry, I can't quarrel with my two best friends at once, but between
- you both you have made me hate the finest piece of work I have ever
- done, and I will destroy it. What is it but canvas and colour? I will
- not let it come across our three lives and mar them."
- Dorian Gray lifted his golden head from the pillow, and with pallid face
- and tear-stained eyes looked at him, as he walked over to the deal
- painting-table that was set beneath the high curtained window. What was
- he doing there? His fingers were straying about among the litter of tin
- tubes and dry brushes, seeking for something. Yes, it was for the long
- palette-knife, with its thin blade of lithe steel. He had found it at
- last. He was going to rip up the canvas.
- With a stifled sob the lad leaped from the couch, and, rushing over to
- Hallward, tore the knife out of his hand, and flung it to the end of the
- studio. "Don't, Basil, don't!" he cried. "It would be murder!"
- "I am glad you appreciate my work at last, Dorian," said the painter,
- coldly, when he had recovered from his surprise. "I never thought you
- would."
- "Appreciate it? I am in love with it, Basil. It is part of myself. I
- feel that."
- "Well, as soon as you are dry, you shall be varnished, and framed, and
- sent home. Then you can do what you like with yourself." And he walked
- across the room and rang the bell for tea. "You will have tea, of
- course, Dorian? And so will you, Harry? Or do you object to such simple
- pleasures?"
- "I adore simple pleasures," said Lord Henry. "They are the last refuge
- of the complex. But I don't like scenes, except on the stage. What
- absurd fellows you are, both of you! I wonder who it was defined man as
- a rational animal. It was the most premature definition ever given. Man
- is many things, but he is not rational. I am glad he is not, after all:
- though I wish you chaps would not squabble over the picture. You had
- much better let me have it, Basil. This silly boy doesn't really want
- it, and I really do."
- "If you let anyone have it but me, Basil, I shall never forgive you!"
- cried Dorian Gray; "and I don't allow people to call me a silly boy."
- "You know the picture is yours, Dorian. I gave it to you before it
- existed."
- "And you know you have been a little silly, Mr. Gray, and that you don't
- really object to being reminded that you are extremely young."
- "I should have objected very strongly this morning, Lord Henry."
- "Ah! this morning! You have lived since then."
- There came a knock at the door, and the butler entered with a laden
- tea-tray and set it down upon a small Japanese table. There was a rattle
- of cups and saucers and the hissing of a fluted Georgian urn. Two
- globe-shaped china dishes were brought in by a page. Dorian Gray went
- over and poured out the tea. The two men sauntered languidly to the
- table, and examined what was under the covers.
- "Let us go to the theatre to-night," said Lord Henry. "There is sure to
- be something on, somewhere. I have promised to dine at White's, but it
- is only with an old friend, so I can send him a wire to say that I am
- ill, or that I am prevented from coming in consequence of a subsequent
- engagement. I think that would be a rather nice excuse: it would have
- all the surprise of candour."
- "It is such a bore putting on one's dress-clothes," muttered Hallward.
- "And, when one has them on, they are so horrid."
- "Yes," answered Lord Henry, dreamily, "the costume of the nineteenth
- century is detestable. It is so sombre, so depressing. Sin is the only
- real colour-element left in modern life."
- "You really must not say things like that before Dorian, Harry."
- "Before which Dorian? The one who is pouring out tea for us, or the one
- in the picture?"
- "Before either."
- "I should like to come to the theatre with you, Lord Henry," said the
- lad.
- "Then you shall come; and you will come too, Basil, won't you?"
- "I can't really. I would sooner not. I have a lot of work to do."
- "Well, then, you and I will go alone, Mr. Gray."
- "I should like that awfully."
- The painter bit his lip and walked over, cup in hand, to the picture. "I
- shall stay with the real Dorian," he said, sadly.
- "Is it the real Dorian?" cried the original of the portrait, strolling
- across to him. "Am I really like that?"
- "Yes; you are just like that."
- "How wonderful, Basil!"
- "At least you are like it in appearance. But it will never alter,"
- sighed Hallward. "That is something."
- "What a fuss people make about fidelity!" exclaimed Lord Henry. "Why,
- even in love it is purely a question for physiology. It has nothing to
- do with our own will. Young men want to be faithful, and are not; old
- men want to be faithless, and cannot: that is all one can say."
- "Don't go to the theatre to-night, Dorian," said Hallward. "Stop and
- dine with me."
- "I can't, Basil."
- "Why?"
- "Because I have promised Lord Henry Wotton to go with him."
- "He won't like you the better for keeping your promises. He always
- breaks his own. I beg you not to go."
- Dorian Gray laughed and shook his head.
- "I entreat you."
- The lad hesitated, and looked over at Lord Henry, who was watching them
- from the tea-table with an amused smile.
- "I must go, Basil," he answered.
- "Very well," said Hallward; and he went over and laid down his cup on
- the tray. "It is rather late, and, as you have to dress, you had better
- lose no time. Good-bye, Harry. Good-bye, Dorian. Come and see me soon.
- Come to-morrow."
- "Certainly."
- "You won't forget?"
- "No, of course not," cried Dorian.
- "And... Harry!"
- "Yes, Basil?"
- "Remember what I asked you, when we were in the garden this morning."
- "I have forgotten it."
- "I trust you."
- "I wish I could trust myself," said Lord Henry, laughing. "Come, Mr.
- Gray, my hansom is outside, and I can drop you at your own place.
- Good-bye, Basil. It has been a most interesting afternoon."
- As the door closed behind them, the painter flung himself down on a
- sofa, and a look of pain came into his face.
- CHAPTER III
- At half-past twelve next day Lord Henry Wotton strolled from Curzon
- Street over to the Albany to call on his uncle, Lord Fermor, a genial if
- somewhat rough-mannered old bachelor, whom the outside world called
- selfish because it derived no particular benefit from him, but who was
- considered generous by Society as he fed the people who amused him. His
- father had been our ambassador at Madrid when Isabella was young, and
- Prim unthought of, but had retired from the Diplomatic Service in a
- capricious moment of annoyance at not being offered the Embassy at
- Paris, a post to which he considered that he was fully entitled by
- reason of his birth, his indolence, the good English of his despatches,
- and his inordinate passion for pleasure. The son, who had been his
- father's secretary, had resigned along with his chief, somewhat
- foolishly as was thought at the time, and on succeeding some months
- later to the title, had set himself to the serious study of the great
- aristocratic art of doing absolutely nothing. He had two large town
- houses, but preferred to live in chambers, as it was less trouble, and
- took most of his meals at his club. He paid some attention to the
- management of his collieries in the Midland counties, excusing himself
- for this taint of industry on the ground that the one advantage of
- having coal was that it enabled a gentleman to afford the decency of
- burning wood on his own hearth. In politics he was a Tory, except when
- the Tories were in office, during which period he roundly abused them
- for being a pack of Radicals. He was a hero to his valet, who bullied
- him, and a terror to most of his relations, whom he bullied in turn.
- Only England could have produced him, and he always said that the
- country was going to the dogs. His principles were out of date, but
- there was a good deal to be said for his prejudices.
- When Lord Henry entered the room, he found his uncle sitting in a rough
- shooting coat, smoking a cheroot, and grumbling over _The Times_. "Well,
- Harry," said the old gentleman, "what brings you out so early? I thought
- you dandies never got up till two, and were not visible till five."
- "Pure family affection, I assure you, Uncle George. I want to get
- something out of you."
- "Money, I suppose," said Lord Fermor, making a wry face. "Well, sit down
- and tell me all about it. Young people, nowadays, imagine that money is
- everything."
- "Yes," murmured Lord Henry, settling his buttonhole in his coat; "and
- when they grow older they know it. But I don't want money. It is only
- people who pay their bills who want that, Uncle George, and I never pay
- mine. Credit is the capital of a younger son, and one lives charmingly
- upon it. Besides, I always deal with Dartmoor's tradesmen, and
- consequently they never bother me. What I want is information; not
- useful information, of course; useless information."
- "Well, I can tell you anything that is in an English Blue-book, Harry,
- although those fellows nowadays write a lot of nonsense. When I was in
- the Diplomatic, things were much better. But I hear they let them in now
- by examination. What can you expect? Examinations, sir, are pure humbug
- from beginning to end. If a man is a gentleman, he knows quite enough,
- and if he is not a gentleman, whatever he knows is bad for him."
- "Mr. Dorian Gray does not belong to Blue-books, Uncle George," said Lord
- Henry, languidly.
- "Mr. Dorian Gray? Who is he?" asked Lord Fermor, knitting his bushy
- white eyebrows.
- "That is what I have come to learn, Uncle George. Or rather, I know who
- he is. He is the last Lord Kelso's grandson. His mother was a Devereux;
- Lady Margaret Devereux. I want you to tell me about his mother. What was
- she like? Whom did she marry? You have known nearly everybody in your
- time, so you might have known her. I am very much interested in Mr. Gray
- at present. I have only just met him."
- "Kelso's grandson!" echoed the old gentleman.--"Kelso's grandson!... Of
- course.... I knew his mother intimately. I believe I was at her
- christening. She was an extraordinarily beautiful girl, Margaret
- Devereux; and made all the men frantic by running away with a penniless
- young fellow; a mere nobody, sir, a subaltern in a foot regiment, or
- something of that kind. Certainly. I remember the whole thing as if it
- happened yesterday. The poor chap was killed in a duel at Spa, a few
- months after the marriage. There was an ugly story about it. They said
- Kelso got some rascally adventurer, some Belgian brute, to insult his
- son-in-law in public; paid him, sir, to do it, paid him; and that the
- fellow spitted his man as if he had been a pigeon. The thing was hushed
- up, but, egad, Kelso ate his chop alone at the club for some time
- afterwards. He brought his daughter back with him, I was told, and she
- never spoke to him again. Oh, yes; it was a bad business. The girl died
- too; died within a year. So she left a son, did she? I had forgotten
- that. What sort of boy is he? If he is like his mother he must be a
- good-looking chap."
- "He is very good-looking," assented Lord Henry.
- "I hope he will fall into proper hands," continued the old man. "He
- should have a pot of money waiting for him if Kelso did the right thing
- by him. His mother had money too. All the Selby property came to her,
- through her grandfather. Her grandfather hated Kelso, thought him a mean
- dog. He was, too. Came to Madrid once when I was there. Egad, I was
- ashamed of him. The Queen used to ask me about the English noble who was
- always quarrelling with the cabmen about their fares. They made quite a
- story of it. I didn't dare to show my face at Court for a month. I hope
- he treated his grandson better than he did the jarvies."
- "I don't know," answered Lord Henry. "I fancy that the boy will be well
- off. He is not of age yet. He has Selby, I know. He told me so. And...
- his mother was very beautiful?"
- "Margaret Devereux was one of the loveliest creatures I ever saw, Harry.
- What on earth induced her to behave as she did, I never could
- understand. She could have married anybody she chose. Carlington was mad
- after her. She was romantic, though. All the women of that family were.
- The men were a poor lot, but, egad! the women were wonderful. Carlington
- went on his knees to her. Told me so himself. She laughed at him, and
- there wasn't a girl in London at the time who wasn't after him. And by
- the way, Harry, talking about silly marriages, what is this humbug your
- father tells me about Dartmoor wanting to marry an American? Ain't
- English girls good enough for him?"
- "It is rather fashionable to marry Americans just now, Uncle George."
- "I'll back English women against the world, Harry," said Lord Fermor,
- striking the table with his fist.
- "The betting is on the Americans."
- "They don't last, I am told," muttered his uncle.
- "A long engagement exhausts them, but they are capital at a
- steeplechase. They take things flying. I don't think Dartmoor has a
- chance."
- "Who are her people?" grumbled the old gentleman. "Has she got any?"
- Lord Henry shook his head. "American girls are as clever at concealing
- their parents as English women are at concealing their past," he said,
- rising to go.
- "They are pork-packers, I suppose?"
- "I hope so, Uncle George, for Dartmoor's sake. I am told that
- pork-packing is the most lucrative profession in America, after
- politics."
- "Is she pretty?"
- "She behaves as if she was beautiful. Most American women do. It is the
- secret of their charm."
- "Why can't these American women stay in their own country? They are
- always telling us that it is the Paradise for women."
- "It is. That is the reason why, like Eve, they are so excessively
- anxious to get out of it," said Lord Henry. "Good-bye, Uncle George. I
- shall be late for lunch, if I stop any longer. Thanks for giving me the
- information I wanted. I always like to know everything about my new
- friends, and nothing about my old ones."
- "Where are you lunching, Harry?"
- "At Aunt Agatha's. I have asked myself and Mr. Gray. He is her latest
- _protégé_."
- "Humph! tell your Aunt Agatha, Harry, not to bother me any more with her
- charity appeals. I am sick of them. Why, the good woman thinks that I
- have nothing to do but to write cheques for her silly fads."
- "All right, Uncle George, I'll tell her, but it won't have any effect.
- Philanthropic people lose all sense of humanity. It is their
- distinguishing characteristic."
- The old gentleman growled approvingly, and rang the bell for his
- servant. Lord Henry passed up the low arcade into Burlington Street, and
- turned his steps in the direction of Berkeley Square.
- So that was the story of Dorian Gray's parentage. Crudely as it had been
- told to him, it had yet stirred him by its suggestion of a strange,
- almost modern romance. A beautiful woman risking everything for a mad
- passion. A few wild weeks of happiness cut short by a hideous,
- treacherous crime. Months of voiceless agony, and then a child born in
- pain. The mother snatched away by death, the boy left to solitude and
- the tyranny of an old and loveless man. Yes; it was an interesting
- background. It posed the lad, made him more perfect as it were. Behind
- every exquisite thing that existed, there was something tragic. Worlds
- had to be in travail, that the meanest flower might blow.... And how
- charming he had been at dinner the night before, as, with startled eyes
- and lips parted in frightened pleasure, he had sat opposite to him at
- the club, the red candleshades staining to a richer rose the wakening
- wonder of his face. Talking to him was like playing upon an exquisite
- violin. He answered to every touch and thrill of the bow.... There was
- something terribly enthralling in the exercise of influence. No other
- activity was like it. To project one's soul into some gracious form, and
- let it tarry there for a moment; to hear one's own intellectual views
- echoed back to one with all the added music of passion and youth; to
- convey one's temperament into another as though it were a subtle fluid
- or a strange perfume; there was a real joy in that--perhaps the most
- satisfying joy left to us in an age so limited and vulgar as our own, an
- age grossly carnal in its pleasures, and grossly common in its aims....
- He was a marvellous type, too, this lad, whom by so curious a chance he
- had met in Basil's studio; or could be fashioned into a marvellous type,
- at any rate. Grace was his, and the white purity of boyhood, and beauty
- such as old Greek marbles kept for us. There was nothing that one could
- not do with him. He could be made a Titan or a toy. What a pity it was
- that such beauty was destined to fade!... And Basil? From a
- psychological point of view, how interesting he was! The new manner in
- art, the fresh mode of looking at life, suggested so strangely by the
- merely visible presence of one who was unconscious of it all; the silent
- spirit that dwelt in dim woodland, and walked unseen in open field,
- suddenly showing herself, Dryad-like and not afraid, because in his soul
- who sought for her there had been wakened that wonderful vision to
- which alone are wonderful things revealed; the mere shapes and patterns
- of things becoming, as it were, refined, and gaining a kind of
- symbolical value, as though they were themselves patterns of some other
- and more perfect form whose shadow they made real: how strange it all
- was! He remembered something like it in history. Was it not Plato, that
- artist in thought, who had first analysed it? Was it not Buonarotti who
- had carved it in the coloured marbles of a sonnet-sequence? But in our
- own century it was strange.... Yes; he would try to be to Dorian Gray
- what, without knowing it, the lad was to the painter who had fashioned
- the wonderful portrait. He would seek to dominate him--had already,
- indeed, half done so. He would make that wonderful spirit his own. There
- was something fascinating in this son of Love and Death.
- Suddenly he stopped, and glanced up at the houses. He found that he had
- passed his aunt's some distance, and, smiling to himself, turned back.
- When he entered the somewhat sombre hall the butler told him that they
- had gone in to lunch. He gave one of the footmen his hat and stick, and
- passed into the dining-room.
- "Late as usual, Harry," cried his aunt, shaking her head at him.
- He invented a facile excuse, and having taken the vacant seat next to
- her, looked round to see who was there. Dorian bowed to him shyly from
- the end of the table, a flush of pleasure stealing into his cheek.
- Opposite was the Duchess of Harley; a lady of admirable good-nature and
- good temper, much liked by everyone who knew her, and of those ample
- architectural proportions that in women who are not Duchesses are
- described by contemporary historians as stoutness. Next to her sat, on
- her right, Sir Thomas Burdon, a Radical member of Parliament, who
- followed his leader in public life, and in private life followed the
- best cooks, dining with the Tories, and thinking with the Liberals, in
- accordance with a wise and well-known rule. The post on her left was
- occupied by Mr. Erskine of Treadley, an old gentleman of considerable
- charm and culture, who had fallen, however, into bad habits of silence,
- having, as he explained once to Lady Agatha, said everything that he had
- to say before he was thirty. His own neighbour was Mrs. Vandeleur, one
- of his aunt's oldest friends, a perfect saint amongst women, but so
- dreadfully dowdy that she reminded one of a badly bound hymn-book.
- Fortunately for him she had on the other side Lord Faudel, a most
- intelligent middle-aged mediocrity, as bald as a Ministerial statement
- in the House of Commons, with whom she was conversing in that intensely
- earnest manner which is the one unpardonable error, as he remarked once
- himself, that all really good people fall into, and from which none of
- them ever quite escape.
- "We are talking about poor Dartmoor, Lord Henry," cried the Duchess,
- nodding pleasantly to him across the table. "Do you think he will really
- marry this fascinating young person?"
- "I believe she has made up her mind to propose to him, Duchess."
- "How dreadful!" exclaimed Lady Agatha. "Really, someone should
- interfere."
- "I am told, on excellent authority, that her father keeps an American
- dry-goods store," said Sir Thomas Burdon, looking supercilious.
- "My uncle has already suggested pork-packing, Sir Thomas."
- "Dry-goods! What are American dry-goods?" asked the Duchess, raising her
- large hands in wonder, and accentuating the verb.
- "American novels," answered Lord Henry, helping himself to some quail.
- The Duchess looked puzzled.
- "Don't mind him, my dear," whispered Lady Agatha. "He never means
- anything that he says."
- "When America was discovered," said the Radical member, and he began to
- give some wearisome facts. Like all people who try to exhaust a subject,
- he exhausted his listeners. The Duchess sighed, and exercised her
- privilege of interruption. "I wish to goodness it never had been
- discovered at all!" she exclaimed. "Really, our girls have no chance
- nowadays. It is most unfair."
- "Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered," said Mr.
- Erskine. "I myself would say that it had merely been detected."
- "Oh! but I have seen specimens of the inhabitants," answered the
- Duchess, vaguely. "I must confess that most of them are extremely
- pretty. And they dress well, too. They get all their dresses in Paris. I
- wish I could afford to do the same."
- "They say that when good Americans die they go to Paris," chuckled Sir
- Thomas, who had a large wardrobe of Humour's cast-off clothes.
- "Really! And where do bad Americans go to when they die?" inquired the
- Duchess.
- "They go to America," murmured Lord Henry.
- Sir Thomas frowned. "I am afraid that your nephew is prejudiced against
- that great country," he said to Lady Agatha. "I have travelled all over
- it, in cars provided by the directors, who, in such matters, are
- extremely civil. I assure you that it is an education to visit it."
- "But must we really see Chicago in order to be educated?" asked Mr.
- Erskine, plaintively. "I don't feel up to the journey."
- Sir Thomas waved his hand. "Mr. Erskine of Treadley has the world on his
- shelves. We practical men like to see things, not to read about them.
- The Americans are an extremely interesting people. They are absolutely
- reasonable. I think that is their distinguishing characteristic. Yes,
- Mr. Erskine, an absolutely reasonable people. I assure you there is no
- nonsense about the Americans."
- "How dreadful!" cried Lord Henry. "I can stand brute force, but brute
- reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It
- is hitting below the intellect."
- "I do not understand you," said Sir Thomas, growing rather red.
- "I do, Lord Henry," murmured Mr. Erskine, with a smile.
- "Paradoxes are all very well in their way...." rejoined the Baronet.
- "Was that a paradox?" asked Mr. Erskine. "I did not think so. Perhaps it
- was. Well, the way of paradoxes is the way of truth. To test Reality we
- must see it on the tight-rope. When the Verities become acrobats we can
- judge them."
- "Dear me!" said Lady Agatha, "how you men argue! I am sure I never can
- make out what you are talking about. Oh! Harry, I am quite vexed with
- you. Why do you try to persuade our nice Mr. Dorian Gray to give up the
- East End? I assure you he would be quite invaluable. They would love his
- playing."
- "I want him to play to me," cried Lord Henry, smiling, and he looked
- down the table and caught a bright answering glance.
- "But they are so unhappy in Whitechapel," continued Lady Agatha.
- "I can sympathise with everything, except suffering," said Lord Henry,
- shrugging his shoulders. "I cannot sympathise with that. It is too ugly,
- too horrible, too distressing. There is something terribly morbid in the
- modern sympathy with pain. One should sympathise with the colour, the
- beauty, the joy of life. The less said about life's sores the better."
- "Still, the East End is a very important problem," remarked Sir Thomas,
- with a grave shake of the head.
- "Quite so," answered the young lord. "It is the problem of slavery, and
- we try to solve it by amusing the slaves."
- The politician looked at him keenly. "What change do you propose, then?"
- he asked.
- Lord Henry laughed. "I don't desire to change anything in England except
- the weather," he answered. "I am quite content with philosophic
- contemplation. But, as the nineteenth century has gone bankrupt through
- an over-expenditure of sympathy, I would suggest that we should appeal
- to Science to put us straight. The advantage of the emotions is that
- they lead us astray, and the advantage of Science is that it is not
- emotional."
- "But we have such grave responsibilities," ventured Mrs. Vandeleur,
- timidly.
- "Terribly grave," echoed Lady Agatha.
- Lord Henry looked over at Mr. Erskine. "Humanity takes itself too
- seriously. It is the world's original sin. If the caveman had known how
- to laugh, History would have been different."
- "You are really very comforting," warbled the Duchess. "I have always
- felt rather guilty when I came to see your dear aunt, for I take no
- interest at all in the East End. For the future I shall be able to look
- her in the face without a blush."
- "A blush is very becoming, Duchess," remarked Lord Henry.
- "Only when one is young," she answered. "When an old woman like myself
- blushes, it is a very bad sign. Ah! Lord Henry, I wish you would tell me
- how to become young again."
- He thought for a moment. "Can you remember any great error that you
- committed in your early days, Duchess?" he asked, looking at her across
- the table.
- "A great many, I fear," she cried.
- "Then commit them over again," he said, gravely. "To get back one's
- youth, one has merely to repeat one's follies."
- "A delightful theory!" she exclaimed. "I must put it into practice."
- "A dangerous theory!" came from Sir Thomas's tight lips. Lady Agatha
- shook her head, but could not help being amused. Mr. Erskine listened.
- "Yes," he continued, "that is one of the great secrets of life. Nowadays
- most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it
- is too late that the only things one never regrets are one's mistakes."
- A laugh ran round the table.
- He played with the idea, and grew wilful; tossed it into the air and
- transformed it; let it escape and recaptured it; made it iridescent with
- fancy, and winged it with paradox. The praise of folly, as he went on,
- soared into a philosophy, and Philosophy herself became young, and
- catching the mad music of Pleasure, wearing, one might fancy, her
- wine-stained robe and wreath of ivy, danced like a Bacchante over the
- hills of life, and mocked the slow Silenus for being sober. Facts fled
- before her like frightened forest things. Her white feet trod the huge
- press at which wise Omar sits, till the seething grape-juice rose round
- her bare limbs in waves of purple bubbles, or crawled in red foam over
- the vat's black, dripping, sloping sides. It was an extraordinary
- improvisation. He felt that the eyes of Dorian Gray were fixed on him,
- and the consciousness that amongst his audience there was one whose
- temperament he wished to fascinate, seemed to give his wit keenness, and
- to lend colour to his imagination. He was brilliant, fantastic,
- irresponsible. He charmed his listeners out of themselves, and they
- followed his pipe laughing. Dorian Gray never took his gaze off him, but
- sat like one under a spell, smiles chasing each other over his lips, and
- wonder growing grave in his darkening eyes.
- At last, liveried in the costume of the age, Reality entered the room in
- the shape of a servant to tell the Duchess that her carriage was
- waiting. She wrung her hands in mock despair. "How annoying!" she cried.
- "I must go. I have to call for my husband at the club, to take him to
- some absurd meeting at Willis's Rooms, where he is going to be in the
- chair. If I am late, he is sure to be furious, and I couldn't have a
- scene in this bonnet. It is far too fragile. A harsh word would ruin it.
- No, I must go, dear Agatha. Good-bye, Lord Henry, you are quite
- delightful, and dreadfully demoralising. I am sure I don't know what to
- say about your views. You must come and dine with us some night.
- Tuesday? Are you disengaged Tuesday?"
- "For you I would throw over anybody, Duchess," said Lord Henry, with a
- bow.
- "Ah! that is very nice, and very wrong of you," she cried; "so mind you
- come;" and she swept out of the room, followed by Lady Agatha and the
- other ladies.
- When Lord Henry had sat down again, Mr. Erskine moved round, and taking
- a chair close to him, placed his hand upon his arm.
- "You talk books away," he said; "why don't you write one?"
- "I am too fond of reading books to care to write them, Mr. Erskine. I
- should like to write a novel certainly; a novel that would be as lovely
- as a Persian carpet, and as unreal. But there is no literary public in
- England for anything except newspapers, primers, and encyclopædias. Of
- all people in the world the English have the least sense of the beauty
- of literature."
- "I fear you are right," answered Mr. Erskine. "I myself used to have
- literary ambitions, but I gave them up long ago. And now, my dear young
- friend, if you will allow me to call you so, may I ask if you really
- meant all that you said to us at lunch?"
- "I quite forget what I said," smiled Lord Henry. "Was it all very bad?"
- "Very bad indeed. In fact I consider you extremely dangerous, and if
- anything happens to our good Duchess we shall all look on you as being
- primarily responsible. But I should like to talk to you about life. The
- generation into which I was born was tedious. Some day, when you are
- tired of London, come down to Treadley, and expound to me your
- philosophy of pleasure over some admirable Burgundy I am fortunate
- enough to possess."
- "I shall be charmed. A visit to Treadley would be a great privilege. It
- has a perfect host, and a perfect library."
- "You will complete it," answered the old gentleman, with a courteous
- bow. "And now I must bid good-bye to your excellent aunt. I am due at
- the Athenæum. It is the hour when we sleep there."
- "All of you, Mr. Erskine?"
- "Forty of us, in forty arm-chairs. We are practising for an English
- Academy of Letters."
- Lord Henry laughed, and rose. "I am going to the Park," he cried.
- As he was passing out of the door Dorian Gray touched him on the arm.
- "Let me come with you," he murmured.
- "But I thought you had promised Basil Hallward to go and see him,"
- answered Lord Henry.
- "I would sooner come with you; yes, I feel I must come with you. Do let
- me. And you will promise to talk to me all the time? No one talks so
- wonderfully as you do."
- "Ah! I have talked quite enough for to-day," said Lord Henry, smiling.
- "All I want now is to look at life. You may come and look at it with me,
- if you care to."
- CHAPTER IV
- One afternoon, a month later, Dorian Gray was reclining in a luxurious
- arm-chair, in the little library of Lord Henry's house in Mayfair. It
- was, in its way, a very charming room, with its high-panelled
- wainscoting of olive-stained oak, its cream-coloured frieze and ceiling
- of raised plaster-work, and its brickdust felt carpet strewn with silk
- long-fringed Persian rugs. On a tiny satinwood table stood a statuette
- by Clodion, and beside it lay a copy of "_Les Cent Nouvelles_," bound
- for Margaret of Valois by Clovis Eve, and powdered with the gilt daisies
- that Queen had selected for her device. Some large blue china jars and
- parrot-tulips were ranged on the mantel-shelf, and through the small
- leaded panels of the window streamed the apricot-coloured light of a
- summer day in London.
- Lord Henry had not yet come in. He was always late on principle, his
- principle being that punctuality is the thief of time. So the lad was
- looking rather sulky, as with listless fingers he turned over the pages
- of an elaborately-illustrated edition of "_Manon Lescaut_" that he had
- found in one of the bookcases. The formal monotonous ticking of the
- Louis Quatorze clock annoyed him. Once or twice he thought of going
- away.
- At last he heard a step outside, and the door opened. "How late you are,
- Harry!" he murmured.
- "I am afraid it is not Harry, Mr. Gray," answered a shrill voice.
- He glanced quickly round, and rose to his feet. "I beg your pardon. I
- thought----"
- "You thought it was my husband. It is only his wife. You must let me
- introduce myself. I know you quite well by your photographs. I think my
- husband has got seventeen of them."
- "Not seventeen, Lady Henry?"
- "Well, eighteen, then. And I saw you with him the other night at the
- Opera." She laughed nervously as she spoke, and watched him with her
- vague forget-me-not eyes. She was a curious woman, whose dresses always
- looked as if they had been designed in a rage and put on in a tempest.
- She was usually in love with somebody, and, as her passion was never
- returned, she had kept all her illusions. She tried to look picturesque,
- but only succeeded in being untidy. Her name was Victoria, and she had a
- perfect mania for going to church.
- "That was at 'Lohengrin,' Lady Henry, I think?"
- "Yes; it was at dear 'Lohengrin.' I like Wagner's music better than
- anybody's. It is so loud that one can talk the whole time without other
- people hearing what one says. That is a great advantage: don't you think
- so, Mr. Gray?"
- The same nervous staccato laugh broke from her thin lips, and her
- fingers began to play with a long tortoise-shell paper-knife.
- Dorian smiled, and shook his head: "I am afraid I don't think so, Lady
- Henry. I never talk during music, at least, during good music. If one
- hears bad music, it is one's duty to drown it in conversation."
- "Ah! that is one of Harry's views, isn't it, Mr. Gray? I always hear
- Harry's views from his friends. It is the only way I get to know of
- them. But you must not think I don't like good music. I adore it, but I
- am afraid of it. It makes me too romantic. I have simply worshipped
- pianists--two at a time, sometimes, Harry tells me. I don't know what it
- is about them. Perhaps it is that they are foreigners. They all are,
- ain't they? Even those that are born in England become foreigners after
- a time, don't they? It is so clever of them, and such a compliment to
- art. Makes it quite cosmopolitan, doesn't it? You have never been to any
- of my parties, have you, Mr. Gray? You must come. I can't afford
- orchids, but I spare no expense in foreigners. They make one's rooms
- look so picturesque. But here is Harry!--Harry, I came in to look for
- you, to ask you something--I forget what it was--and I found Mr. Gray
- here. We have had such a pleasant chat about music. We have quite the
- same ideas. No; I think our ideas are quite different. But he has been
- most pleasant. I am so glad I've seen him."
- "I am charmed, my love, quite charmed," said Lord Henry, elevating his
- dark crescent-shaped eyebrows and looking at them both with an amused
- smile. "So sorry I am late, Dorian. I went to look after a piece of old
- brocade in Wardour Street, and had to bargain for hours for it. Nowadays
- people know the price of everything, and the value of nothing."
- "I am afraid I must be going," exclaimed Lady Henry, breaking an awkward
- silence with her silly sudden laugh. "I have promised to drive with the
- Duchess. Good-bye, Mr. Gray. Good-bye, Harry. You are dining out, I
- suppose? So am I. Perhaps I shall see you at Lady Thornbury's."
- "I daresay, my dear," said Lord Henry, shutting the door behind her, as,
- looking like a bird of paradise that had been out all night in the rain,
- she flitted out of the room, leaving a faint odour of frangipanni. Then
- he lit a cigarette, and flung himself down on the sofa.
- "Never marry a woman with straw-coloured hair, Dorian," he said, after a
- few puffs.
- "Why, Harry?"
- "Because they are so sentimental."
- "But I like sentimental people."
- "Never marry at all, Dorian. Men marry because they are tired; women,
- because they are curious; both are disappointed."
- "I don't think I am likely to marry, Henry. I am too much in love. That
- is one of your aphorisms. I am putting it into practice, as I do
- everything that you say."
- "Who are you in love with?" asked Lord Henry, after a pause.
- "With an actress," said Dorian Gray, blushing.
- Lord Henry shrugged his shoulders. "That is a rather commonplace
- _début_."
- "You would not say so if you saw her, Harry."
- "Who is she?"
- "Her name is Sibyl Vane."
- "Never heard of her."
- "No one has. People will some day, however. She is a genius."
- "My dear boy, no woman is a genius. Women are a decorative sex. They
- never have anything to say, but they say it charmingly. Women represent
- the triumph of matter over mind, just as men represent the triumph of
- mind over morals."
- "Harry, how can you?"
- "My dear Dorian, it is quite true. I am analysing women at the present,
- so I ought to know. The subject is not so abstruse as I thought it was.
- I find that, ultimately, there are only two kinds of women, the plain
- and the coloured. The plain women are very useful. If you want to gain a
- reputation for respectability, you have merely to take them down to
- supper. The other women are very charming. They commit one mistake,
- however. They paint in order to try and look young. Our grandmothers
- painted in order to try and talk brilliantly. _Rouge_ and _esprit_ used
- to go together. That is all over now. As long as a woman can look ten
- years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied. As for
- conversation, there are only five women in London worth talking to, and
- two of these can't be admitted into decent society. However, tell me
- about your genius. How long have you known her?"
- "Ah! Harry, your views terrify me."
- "Never mind that. How long have you known her?"
- "About three weeks."
- "And where did you come across her?"
- "I will tell you, Harry; but you mustn't be unsympathetic about it.
- After all, it never would have happened if I had not met you. You filled
- me with a wild desire to know everything about life. For days after I
- met you, something seemed to throb in my veins. As I lounged in the
- Park, or strolled down Piccadilly, I used to look at every one who
- passed me, and wonder, with a mad curiosity, what sort of lives they
- led. Some of them fascinated me. Others filled me with terror. There was
- an exquisite poison in the air. I had a passion for sensations.... Well,
- one evening about seven o'clock, I determined to go out in search of
- some adventure. I felt that this grey, monstrous London of ours, with
- its myriads of people, its sordid sinners, and its splendid sins, as you
- once phrased it, must have something in store for me. I fancied a
- thousand things. The mere danger gave me a sense of delight. I
- remembered what you had said to me on that wonderful evening when we
- first dined together, about the search for beauty being the real secret
- of life. I don't know what I expected, but I went out and wandered
- eastward, soon losing my way in a labyrinth of grimy streets and black,
- grassless squares. About half-past eight I passed by an absurd little
- theatre, with great flaring gas-jets and gaudy play-bills. A hideous
- Jew, in the most amazing waistcoat I ever beheld in my life, was
- standing at the entrance, smoking a vile cigar. He had greasy ringlets,
- and an enormous diamond blazed in the centre of a soiled shirt. 'Have a
- box, my Lord?' he said, when he saw me, and he took off his hat with an
- air of gorgeous servility. There was something about him, Harry, that
- amused me. He was such a monster. You will laugh at me, I know, but I
- really went in and paid a whole guinea for the stage-box. To the
- present day I can't make out why I did so; and yet if I hadn't--my dear
- Harry, if I hadn't, I should have missed the greatest romance of my
- life. I see you are laughing. It is horrid of you!"
- "I am not laughing, Dorian; at least I am not laughing at you. But you
- should not say the greatest romance of your life. You should say the
- first romance of your life. You will always be loved, and you will
- always be in love with love. A _grande passion_ is the privilege of
- people who have nothing to do. That is the one use of the idle classes
- of a country. Don't be afraid. There are exquisite things in store for
- you. This is merely the beginning."
- "Do you think my nature so shallow?" cried Dorian Gray, angrily.
- "No; I think your nature so deep."
- "How do you mean?"
- "My dear boy, the people who love only once in their lives are really
- the shallow people. What they call their loyalty, and their fidelity, I
- call either the lethargy of custom or their lack of imagination.
- Faithfulness is to the emotional life what consistency is to the life of
- the intellect--simply a confession of failures. Faithfulness! I must
- analyse it some day. The passion for property is in it. There are many
- things that we would throw away if we were not afraid that others might
- pick them up. But I don't want to interrupt you. Go on with your story."
- "Well, I found myself seated in a horrid little private box, with a
- vulgar drop-scene staring me in the face. I looked out from behind the
- curtain, and surveyed the house. It was a tawdry affair, all Cupids and
- cornucopias, like a third-rate wedding cake. The gallery and pit were
- fairy full, but the two rows of dingy stalls were quite empty, and there
- was hardly a person in what I suppose they called the dress-circle.
- Women went about with oranges and ginger-beer, and there was a terrible
- consumption of nuts going on."
- "It must have been just like the palmy days of the British Drama."
- "Just like, I should fancy, and very depressing. I began to wonder what
- on earth I should do, when I caught sight of the play-bill. What do you
- think the play was, Harry?"
- "I should think 'The Idiot Boy, or Dumb but Innocent.' Our fathers used
- to like that sort of piece, I believe. The longer I live, Dorian, the
- more keenly I feel that whatever was good enough for our fathers is not
- good enough for us. In art, as in politics, _les grandpères ont toujours
- tort_."
- "This play was good enough for us, Harry. It was 'Romeo and Juliet.' I
- must admit that I was rather annoyed at the idea of seeing Shakespeare
- done in such a wretched hole of a place. Still, I felt interested, in a
- sort of way. At any rate, I determined to wait for the first act. There
- was a dreadful orchestra, presided over by a young Hebrew who sat at a
- cracked piano, that nearly drove me away, but at last the drop-scene was
- drawn up, and the play began. Romeo was a stout elderly gentleman, with
- corked eyebrows, a husky tragedy voice, and a figure like a beer-barrel.
- Mercutio was almost as bad. He was played by the low-comedian, who had
- introduced gags of his own and was on most friendly terms with the pit.
- They were both as grotesque as the scenery, and that looked as if it had
- come out of a country-booth. But Juliet! Harry, imagine a girl, hardly
- seventeen years of age, with a little flower-like face, a small Greek
- head with plaited coils of dark-brown hair, eyes that were violet wells
- of passion, lips that were like the petals of a rose. She was the
- loveliest thing I had ever seen in my life. You said to me once that
- pathos left you unmoved, but that beauty, mere beauty, could fill your
- eyes with tears. I tell you, Harry, I could hardly see this girl for the
- mist of tears that came across me. And her voice--I never heard such a
- voice. It was very low at first, with deep mellow notes, that seemed to
- fall singly upon one's ear. Then it became a little louder, and sounded
- like a flute or a distant hautbois. In the garden-scene it had all the
- tremulous ecstasy that one hears just before dawn when nightingales are
- singing. There were moments, later on, when it had the wild passion of
- violins. You know how a voice can stir one. Your voice and the voice of
- Sibyl Vane are two things that I shall never forget. When I close my
- eyes, I hear them, and each of them says something different. I don't
- know which to follow. Why should I not love her? Harry, I do love her.
- She is everything to me in life. Night after night I go to see her play.
- One evening she is Rosalind, and the next evening she is Imogen. I have
- seen her die in the gloom of an Italian tomb, sucking the poison from
- her lover's lips. I have watched her wandering through the forest of
- Arden, disguised as a pretty boy in hose and doublet and dainty cap. She
- has been mad, and has come into the presence of a guilty king, and given
- him rue to wear, and bitter herbs to taste of. She has been innocent,
- and the black hands of jealousy have crushed her reed-like throat. I
- have seen her in every age and in every costume. Ordinary women never
- appeal to one's imagination. They are limited to their century. No
- glamour ever transfigures them. One knows their minds as easily as one
- knows their bonnets. One can always find them. There is no mystery in
- any of them. They ride in the Park in the morning, and chatter at
- tea-parties in the afternoon. They have their stereotyped smile, and
- their fashionable manner. They are quite obvious. But an actress! How
- different an actress is! Harry! why didn't you tell me that the only
- thing worth loving is an actress?"
- "Because I have loved so many of them, Dorian."
- "Oh, yes, horrid people with dyed hair and painted faces."
- "Don't run down dyed hair and painted faces. There is an extraordinary
- charm in them, sometimes," said Lord Henry.
- "I wish now I had not told you about Sibyl Vane."
- "You could not have helped telling me, Dorian. All through your life you
- will tell me everything you do."
- "Yes, Harry, I believe that is true. I cannot help telling you things.
- You have a curious influence over me. If I ever did a crime, I would
- come and confess it to you. You would understand me."
- "People like you--the wilful sunbeams of life--don't commit crimes,
- Dorian. But I am much obliged for the compliment, all the same. And now
- tell me--reach me the matches, like a good boy: thanks:--what are your
- actual relations with Sibyl Vane?"
- Dorian Gray leaped to his feet, with flushed cheeks and burning eyes.
- "Harry! Sibyl Vane is sacred!"
- "It is only the sacred things that are worth touching, Dorian," said
- Lord Henry, with a strange touch of pathos in his voice. "But why should
- you be annoyed? I suppose she will belong to you some day. When one is
- in love, one always begins by deceiving one's self, and one always ends
- by deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance. You know
- her, at any rate, I suppose?"
- "Of course I know her. On the first night I was at the theatre, the
- horrid old Jew came round to the box after the performance was over, and
- offered to take me behind the scenes and introduce me to her. I was
- furious with him, and told him that Juliet had been dead for hundreds of
- years, and that her body was lying in a marble tomb in Verona. I think,
- from his blank look of amazement, that he was under the impression that
- I had taken too much champagne, or something."
- "I am not surprised."
- "Then he asked me if I wrote for any of the newspapers. I told him I
- never even read them. He seemed terribly disappointed at that, and
- confided to me that all the dramatic critics were in a conspiracy
- against him, and that they were every one of them to be bought."
- "I should not wonder if he was quite right there. But, on the other
- hand, judging from their appearance, most of them cannot be at all
- expensive."
- "Well, he seemed to think they were beyond his means," laughed Dorian.
- "By this time, however, the lights were being put out in the theatre,
- and I had to go. He wanted me to try some cigars that he strongly
- recommended. I declined. The next night, of course, I arrived at the
- place again. When he saw me he made me a low bow, and assured me that I
- was a munificent patron of art. He was a most offensive brute, though he
- had an extraordinary passion for Shakespeare. He told me once, with an
- air of pride, that his five bankruptcies were entirely due to 'The
- Bard,' as he insisted on calling him. He seemed to think it a
- distinction."
- "It was a distinction, my dear Dorian--a great distinction. Most people
- become bankrupt through having invested too heavily in the prose of
- life. To have ruined one's self over poetry is an honour. But when did
- you first speak to Miss Sibyl Vane?"
- "The third night. She had been playing Rosalind. I could not help going
- round. I had thrown her some flowers, and she had looked at me; at least
- I fancied that she had. The old Jew was persistent. He seemed determined
- to take me behind, so I consented. It was curious my not wanting to know
- her, wasn't it?"
- "No; I don't think so."
- "My dear Harry, why?"
- "I will tell you some other time. Now I want to know about the girl."
- "Sibyl? Oh, she was so shy, and so gentle. There is something of a child
- about her. Her eyes opened wide in exquisite wonder when I told her what
- I thought of her performance, and she seemed quite unconscious of her
- power. I think we were both rather nervous. The old Jew stood grinning
- at the doorway of the dusty greenroom, making elaborate speeches about
- us both, while we stood looking at each other like children. He would
- insist on calling me 'My Lord,' so I had to assure Sibyl that I was not
- anything of the kind. She said quite simply to me, 'You look more like a
- prince. I must call you Prince Charming.'"
- "Upon my word, Dorian, Miss Sibyl knows how to pay compliments."
- "You don't understand her, Harry. She regarded me merely as a person in
- a play. She knows nothing of life. She lives with her mother, a faded
- tired woman who played Lady Capulet in a sort of magenta
- dressing-wrapper on the first night, and looks as if she had seen better
- days."
- "I know that look. It depresses me," murmured Lord Henry, examining his
- rings.
- "The Jew wanted to tell me her history, but I said it did not interest
- me."
- "You were quite right. There is always something infinitely mean about
- other people's tragedies."
- "Sibyl is the only thing I care about. What is it to me where she came
- from? From her little head to her little feet, she is absolutely and
- entirely divine. Every night of my life I go to see her act, and every
- night she is more marvellous."
- "That is the reason, I suppose, that you never dine with me now. I
- thought you must have some curious romance on hand. You have; but it is
- not quite what I expected."
- "My dear Harry, we either lunch or sup together every day, and I have
- been to the Opera with you several times," said Dorian, opening his blue
- eyes in wonder.
- "You always come dreadfully late."
- "Well, I can't help going to see Sibyl play," he cried, "even if it is
- only for a single act. I get hungry for her presence; and when I think
- of the wonderful soul that is hidden away in that little ivory body, I
- am filled with awe."
- "You can dine with me to-night, Dorian, can't you?"
- He shook his head. "To-night she is Imogen," he answered, "and to-morrow
- night she will be Juliet."
- "When is she Sibyl Vane?"
- "Never."
- "I congratulate you."
- "How horrid you are! She is all the great heroines of the world in one.
- She is more than an individual. You laugh, but I tell you she has
- genius. I love her, and I must make her love me. You, who know all the
- secrets of life, tell me how to charm Sibyl Vane to love me! I want to
- make Romeo jealous. I want the dead lovers of the world to hear our
- laughter, and grow sad. I want a breath of our passion to stir their
- dust into consciousness, to wake their ashes into pain. My God, Harry,
- how I worship her!" He was walking up and down the room as he spoke.
- Hectic spots of red burned on his cheeks. He was terribly excited.
- Lord Henry watched him with a subtle sense of pleasure. How different he
- was now from the shy, frightened boy he had met in Basil Hallward's
- studio! His nature had developed like a flower, had borne blossoms of
- scarlet flame. Out of its secret hiding-place had crept his Soul, and
- Desire had come to meet it on the way.
- "And what do you propose to do?" said Lord Henry, at last.
- "I want you and Basil to come with me some night and see her act. I have
- not the slightest fear of the result. You are certain to acknowledge her
- genius. Then we must get her out of the Jew's hands. She is bound to him
- for three years--at least for two years and eight months--from the
- present time. I shall have to pay him something, of course. When all
- that is settled, I shall take a West End theatre and bring her out
- properly. She will make the world as mad as she has made me."
- "That would be impossible, my dear boy?"
- "Yes, she will. She has not merely art, consummate art-instinct, in her,
- but she has personality also; and you have often told me that it is
- personalities, not principles, that move the age."
- "Well, what night shall we go?"
- "Let me see. To-day is Tuesday. Let us fix to-morrow. She plays Juliet
- to-morrow."
- "All right. The Bristol at eight o'clock; and I will get Basil."
- "Not eight, Harry, please. Half-past six. We must be there before the
- curtain rises. You must see her in the first act, where she meets
- Romeo."
- "Half-past six! What an hour! It will be like having a meat-tea, or
- reading an English novel. It must be seven. No gentleman dines before
- seven. Shall you see Basil between this and then? Or shall I write to
- him?"
- "Dear Basil! I have not laid eyes on him for a week. It is rather horrid
- of me, as he has sent me my portrait in the most wonderful frame,
- specially designed by himself, and, though I am a little jealous of the
- picture for being a whole month younger than I am, I must admit that I
- delight in it. Perhaps you had better write to him. I don't want to see
- him alone. He says things that annoy me. He gives me good advice."
- Lord Henry smiled. "People are very fond of giving away what they need
- most themselves. It is what I call the depth of generosity."
- "Oh, Basil is the best of fellows, but he seems to me to be just a bit
- of a Philistine. Since I have known you, Harry, I have discovered that."
- "Basil, my dear boy, puts everything that is charming in him into his
- work. The consequence is that he has nothing left for life but his
- prejudices, his principles, and his common-sense. The only artists I
- have ever known, who are personally delightful, are bad artists. Good
- artists exist simply in what they make, and consequently are perfectly
- uninteresting in what they are. A great poet, a really great poet, is
- the most unpoetical of all creatures. But inferior poets are absolutely
- fascinating. The worse their rhymes are, the more picturesque they look.
- The mere fact of having published a book of second-rate sonnets makes a
- man quite irresistible. He lives the poetry that he cannot write. The
- others write the poetry that they dare not realise."
- "I wonder is that really so, Harry?" said Dorian Gray, putting some
- perfume on his handkerchief out of a large gold-topped bottle that stood
- on the table. "It must be, if you say it. And now I am off. Imogen is
- waiting for me. Don't forget about to-morrow. Good-bye."
- As he left the room, Lord Henry's heavy eyelids drooped, and he began to
- think. Certainly few people had ever interested him so much as Dorian
- Gray, and yet the lad's mad adoration of some one else caused him not
- the slightest pang of annoyance or jealousy. He was pleased by it. It
- made him a more interesting study. He had been always enthralled by the
- methods of natural science, but the ordinary subject-matter of that
- science had seemed to him trivial and of no import. And so he had begun
- by vivisecting himself, as he had ended by vivisecting others. Human
- life--that appeared to him the one thing worth investigating. Compared
- to it there was nothing else of any value. It was true that as one
- watched life in its curious crucible of pain and pleasure, one could not
- wear over one's face a mask of glass, nor keep the sulphurous fumes from
- troubling the brain, and making the imagination turbid with monstrous
- fancies and misshapen dreams. There were poisons so subtle that to know
- their properties one had to sicken of them. There were maladies so
- strange that one had to pass through them if one sought to understand
- their nature. And, yet, what a great reward one received! How wonderful
- the whole world became to one! To note the curious hard logic of
- passion, and the emotional coloured life of the intellect--to observe
- where they met, and where they separated, at what point they were in
- unison, and at what point they were at discord--there was a delight in
- that! What matter what the cost was? One could never pay too high a
- price for any sensation.
- He was conscious--and the thought brought a gleam of pleasure into his
- brown agate eyes--that it was through certain words of his, musical
- words said with musical utterance, that Dorian Gray's soul had turned to
- this white girl and bowed in worship before her. To a large extent the
- lad was his own creation. He had made him premature. That was something.
- Ordinary people waited till life disclosed to them its secrets, but to
- the few, to the elect, the mysteries of life were revealed before the
- veil was drawn away. Sometimes this was the effect of art, and chiefly
- of the art of literature, which dealt immediately with the passions and
- the intellect. But now and then a complex personality took the place and
- assumed the office of art; was indeed, in its way, a real work of art,
- Life having its elaborate masterpieces, just as poetry has, or
- sculpture, or painting.
- Yes, the lad was premature. He was gathering his harvest while it was
- yet spring. The pulse and passion of youth were in him, but he was
- becoming self-conscious. It was delightful to watch him. With his
- beautiful face, and his beautiful soul, he was a thing to wonder at. It
- was no matter how it all ended, or was destined to end. He was like one
- of those gracious figures in a pageant or a play, whose joys seem to be
- remote from one, but whose sorrows stir one's sense of beauty, and whose
- wounds are like red roses.
- Soul and body, body and soul--how mysterious they were! There was
- animalism in the soul, and the body had its moments of spirituality.
- The senses could refine, and the intellect could degrade. Who could say
- where the fleshly impulse ceased, or the physical impulse began? How
- shallow were the arbitrary definitions of ordinary psychologists! And
- yet how difficult to decide between the claims of the various schools!
- Was the soul a shadow seated in the house of sin? Or was the body really
- in the soul, as Giordano Bruno thought? The separation of spirit from
- matter was a mystery, and the union of spirit with matter was a mystery
- also.
- He began to wonder whether we could ever make psychology so absolute a
- science that each little spring of life would be revealed to us. As it
- was, we always misunderstood ourselves, and rarely understood others.
- Experience was of no ethical value. It was merely the name men gave to
- their mistakes. Moralists had, as a rule, regarded it as a mode of
- warning, had claimed for it a certain ethical efficacy in the formation
- of character, had praised it as something that taught us what to follow
- and showed us what to avoid. But there was no motive power in
- experience. It was as little of an active cause as conscience itself.
- All that it really demonstrated was that our future would be the same as
- our past, and that the sin we had done once, and with loathing, we would
- do many times, and with joy.
- It was clear to him that the experimental method was the only method by
- which one could arrive at any scientific analysis of the passions; and
- certainly Dorian Gray was a subject made to his hand, and seemed to
- promise rich and fruitful results. His sudden mad love for Sibyl Vane
- was a psychological phenomenon of no small interest. There was no doubt
- that curiosity had much to do with it, curiosity and the desire for new
- experiences; yet it was not a simple but rather a very complex passion.
- What there was in it of the purely sensuous instinct of boyhood had been
- transformed by the workings of the imagination, changed into something
- that seemed to the lad himself to be remote from sense, and was for
- that very reason all the more dangerous. It was the passions about whose
- origin we deceived ourselves that tyrannised most strongly over us. Our
- weakest motives were those of whose nature we were conscious. It often
- happened that when we thought we were experimenting on others we were
- really experimenting on ourselves.
- While Lord Henry sat dreaming on these things, a knock came to the door,
- and his valet entered, and reminded him it was time to dress for dinner.
- He got up and looked out into the street. The sunset had smitten into
- scarlet gold the upper windows of the houses opposite. The panes glowed
- like plates of heated metal. The sky above was like a faded rose. He
- thought of his friend's young fiery-coloured life, and wondered how it
- was all going to end.
- When he arrived home, about half-past twelve o'clock, he saw a telegram
- lying on the hall table. He opened it, and found it was from Dorian
- Gray. It was to tell him that he was engaged to be married to Sibyl
- Vane.
- CHAPTER V
- "Mother, mother, I am so happy!" whispered the girl, burying her face in
- the lap of the faded, tired-looking woman who, with back turned to the
- shrill intrusive light, was sitting in the one arm-chair that their
- dingy sitting-room contained. "I am so happy!" she repeated, "and you
- must be happy too!"
- Mrs. Vane winced, and put her thin bismuth-whitened hands on her
- daughter's head. "Happy!" she echoed, "I am only happy, Sibyl, when I
- see you act. You must not think of anything but your acting. Mr. Isaacs
- has been very good to us, and we owe him money."
- The girl looked up and pouted. "Money, mother?" she cried, "what does
- money matter? Love is more than money."
- "Mr. Isaacs has advanced us fifty pounds to pay off our debts, and to
- get a proper outfit for James. You must not forget that, Sibyl. Fifty
- pounds is a very large sum. Mr. Isaacs has been most considerate."
- "He is not a gentleman, mother, and I hate the way he talks to me," said
- the girl, rising to her feet, and going over to the window.
- "I don't know how we could manage without him," answered the elder
- woman, querulously.
- Sibyl Vane tossed her head and laughed. "We don't want him any more,
- mother. Prince Charming rules life for us now." Then she paused. A rose
- shook in her blood, and shadowed her cheeks. Quick breath parted the
- petals of her lips. They trembled. Some southern wind of passion swept
- over her, and stirred the dainty folds of her dress. "I love him," she
- said, simply.
- "Foolish child! foolish child!" was the parrot-phrase flung in answer.
- The waving of crooked, false-jewelled fingers gave grotesqueness to the
- words.
- The girl laughed again. The joy of a caged bird was in her voice. Her
- eyes caught the melody, and echoed it in radiance; then closed for a
- moment, as though to hide their secret. When they opened, the mist of a
- dream had passed across them.
- Thin-lipped wisdom spoke at her from the worn chair, hinted at prudence,
- quoted from that book of cowardice whose author apes the name of common
- sense. She did not listen. She was free in her prison of passion. Her
- prince, Prince Charming, was with her. She had called on Memory to
- remake him. She had sent her soul to search for him, and it had brought
- him back. His kiss burned again upon her mouth. Her eyelids were warm
- with his breath.
- Then Wisdom altered its method and spoke of espial and discovery. This
- young man might be rich. If so, marriage should be thought of. Against
- the shell of her ear broke the waves of worldly cunning. The arrows of
- craft shot by her. She saw the thin lips moving, and smiled.
- Suddenly she felt the need to speak. The wordy silence troubled her.
- "Mother, mother," she cried, "why does he love me so much? I know why I
- love him. I love him because he is like what Love himself should be. But
- what does he see in me? I am not worthy of him. And yet--why, I cannot
- tell--though I feel so much beneath him, I don't feel humble. I feel
- proud, terribly proud. Mother, did you love my father as I love Prince
- Charming?"
- The elder woman grew pale beneath the coarse powder that daubed her
- cheeks, and her dry lips twitched with a spasm of pain. Sibyl rushed to
- her, flung her arms round her neck, and kissed her. "Forgive me, mother.
- I know it pains you to talk about our father. But it only pains you
- because you loved him so much. Don't look so sad. I am as happy to-day
- as you were twenty years ago. Ah! let me be happy for ever!"
- "My child, you are far too young to think of falling in love. Besides,
- what do you know of this young man? You don't even know his name. The
- whole thing is most inconvenient, and really, when James is going away
- to Australia, and I have so much to think of, I must say that you should
- have shown more consideration. However, as I said before, if he is
- rich...."
- "Ah! Mother, mother, let me be happy!"
- Mrs. Vane glanced at her, and with one of those false theatrical
- gestures that so often become a mode of second nature to a stage-player,
- clasped her in her arms. At this moment the door opened, and a young lad
- with rough brown hair came into the room. He was thick-set of figure,
- and his hands and feet were large, and somewhat clumsy in movement. He
- was not so finely bred as his sister. One would hardly have guessed the
- close relationship that existed between them. Mrs. Vane fixed her eyes
- on him, and intensified the smile. She mentally elevated her son to the
- dignity of an audience. She felt sure that the _tableau_ was
- interesting.
- "You might keep some of your kisses for me, Sibyl, I think," said the
- lad, with a good-natured grumble.
- "Ah! but you don't like being kissed, Jim," she cried. "You are a
- dreadful old bear." And she ran across the room and hugged him.
- James Vane looked into his sister's face with tenderness. "I want you to
- come out with me for a walk, Sibyl. I don't suppose I shall ever see
- this horrid London again. I am sure I don't want to."
- "My son, don't say such dreadful things," murmured Mrs. Vane, taking up
- a tawdry theatrical dress, with a sigh, and beginning to patch it. She
- felt a little disappointed that he had not joined the group. It would
- have increased the theatrical picturesqueness of the situation.
- "Why not, mother? I mean it."
- "You pain me, my son. I trust you will return from Australia in a
- position of affluence. I believe there is no society of any kind in the
- Colonies, nothing that I would call society; so when you have made your
- fortune you must come back and assert yourself in London."
- "Society!" muttered the lad. "I don't want to know anything about that.
- I should like to make some money to take you and Sibyl off the stage. I
- hate it."
- "Oh, Jim!" said Sibyl, laughing, "how unkind of you! But are you really
- going for a walk with me? That will be nice! I was afraid you were going
- to say good-bye to some of your friends--to Tom Hardy, who gave you that
- hideous pipe, or Ned Langton, who makes fun of you for smoking it. It is
- very sweet of you to let me have your last afternoon. Where shall we go?
- Let us go to the Park."
- "I am too shabby," he answered, frowning. "Only swell people go to the
- Park."
- "Nonsense, Jim," she whispered, stroking the sleeve of his coat.
- He hesitated for a moment. "Very well," he said at last, "but don't be
- too long dressing." She danced out of the door. One could hear her
- singing as she ran upstairs. Her little feet pattered overhead.
- He walked up and down the room two or three times. Then he turned to the
- still figure in the chair. "Mother, are my things ready?" he asked.
- "Quite ready, James," she answered, keeping her eyes on her work. For
- some months past she had felt ill at ease when she was alone with this
- rough, stern son of hers. Her shallow secret nature was troubled when
- their eyes met. She used to wonder if he suspected anything. The
- silence, for he made no other observation, became intolerable to her.
- She began to complain. Women defend themselves by attacking, just as
- they attack by sudden and strange surrenders. "I hope you will be
- contented, James, with your sea-faring life," she said. "You must
- remember that it is your own choice. You might have entered a
- solicitor's office. Solicitors are a very respectable class, and in the
- country often dine with the best families."
- "I hate offices, and I hate clerks," he replied. "But you are quite
- right. I have chosen my own life. All I say is, watch over Sibyl. Don't
- let her come to any harm. Mother, you must watch over her."
- "James, you really talk very strangely. Of course I watch over Sibyl."
- "I hear a gentleman comes every night to the theatre, and goes behind to
- talk to her. Is that right? What about that?"
- "You are speaking about things you don't understand, James. In the
- profession we are accustomed to receive a great deal of most gratifying
- attention. I myself used to receive many bouquets at one time. That was
- when acting was really understood. As for Sibyl, I do not know at
- present whether her attachment is serious or not. But there is no doubt
- that the young man in question is a perfect gentleman. He is always most
- polite to me. Besides, he has the appearance of being rich, and the
- flowers he sends are lovely."
- "You don't know his name, though," said the lad, harshly.
- "No," answered his mother, with a placid expression in her face. "He has
- not yet revealed his real name. I think it is quite romantic of him. He
- is probably a member of the aristocracy."
- James Vane bit his lip. "Watch over Sibyl, mother," he cried, "watch
- over her."
- "My son, you distress me very much. Sibyl is always under my special
- care. Of course, if this gentleman is wealthy, there is no reason why
- she should not contract an alliance with him. I trust he is one of the
- aristocracy. He has all the appearance of it, I must say. It might be a
- most brilliant marriage for Sibyl. They would make a charming couple.
- His good looks are really quite remarkable; everybody notices them."
- The lad muttered something to himself, and drummed on the window-pane
- with his coarse fingers. He had just turned round to say something, when
- the door opened, and Sibyl ran in.
- "How serious you both are!" she cried. "What is the matter?"
- "Nothing," he answered. "I suppose one must be serious sometimes.
- Good-bye, mother; I will have my dinner at five o'clock. Everything is
- packed, except my shirts, so you need not trouble."
- "Good-bye, my son," she answered, with a bow of strained stateliness.
- She was extremely annoyed at the tone he had adopted with her, and there
- was something in his look that had made her feel afraid.
- "Kiss me, mother," said the girl. Her flower-like lips touched the
- withered cheek, and warmed its frost.
- "My child! my child!" cried Mrs. Vane, looking up to the ceiling in
- search of an imaginary gallery.
- "Come, Sibyl," said her brother, impatiently. He hated his mother's
- affectations.
- They went out into the flickering wind-blown sunlight, and strolled down
- the dreary Euston Road. The passers-by glanced in wonder at the sullen,
- heavy youth, who, in coarse, ill-fitting clothes, was in the company of
- such a graceful, refined-looking girl. He was like a common gardener
- walking with a rose.
- Jim frowned from time to time when he caught the inquisitive glance of
- some stranger. He had that dislike of being stared at which comes on
- geniuses late in life, and never leaves the commonplace. Sibyl, however,
- was quite unconscious of the effect she was producing. Her love was
- trembling in laughter on her lips. She was thinking of Prince Charming,
- and, that she might think of him all the more, she did not talk of him
- but prattled on about the ship in which Jim was going to sail, about
- the gold he was certain to find, about the wonderful heiress whose life
- he was to save from the wicked, red-shirted bushrangers. For he was not
- to remain a sailor, or a super-cargo, or whatever he was going to be.
- Oh, no! A sailor's existence was dreadful. Fancy being cooped up in a
- horrid ship, with the hoarse, hump-backed waves trying to get in, and a
- black wind blowing the masts down, and tearing the sails into long
- screaming ribands! He was to leave the vessel at Melbourne, bid a polite
- good-bye to the captain, and go off at once to the gold-fields. Before a
- week was over he was to come across a large nugget of pure gold, the
- largest nugget that had ever been discovered, and bring it down to the
- coast in a waggon guarded by six mounted policemen. The bushrangers were
- to attack them three times, and be defeated with immense slaughter. Or,
- no. He was not to go to the gold-fields at all. They were horrid places,
- where men got intoxicated, and shot each other in bar-rooms, and used
- bad language. He was to be a nice sheep-farmer, and one evening, as he
- was riding home, he was to see the beautiful heiress being carried off
- by a robber on a black horse, and give chase, and rescue her. Of course
- she would fall in love with him, and he with her, and they would get
- married, and come home, and live in an immense house in London. Yes,
- there were delightful things in store for him. But he must be very good,
- and not lose his temper, or spend his money foolishly. She was only a
- year older than he was, but she knew so much more of life. He must be
- sure, also, to write to her by every mail, and to say his prayers each
- night before he went to sleep. God was very good, and would watch over
- him. She would pray for him, too, and in a few years he would come back
- quite rich and happy.
- The lad listened sulkily to her, and made no answer. He was heart-sick
- at leaving home.
- Yet it was not this alone that made him gloomy and morose.
- Inexperienced though he was, he had still a strong sense of the danger
- of Sibyl's position. This young dandy who was making love to her could
- mean her no good. He was a gentleman, and he hated him for that, hated
- him through some curious race-instinct for which he could not account,
- and which for that reason was all the more dominant within him. He was
- conscious also of the shallowness and vanity of his mother's nature, and
- in that saw infinite peril for Sibyl and Sibyl's happiness. Children
- begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them;
- sometimes they forgive them.
- His mother! He had something on his mind to ask of her, something that
- he had brooded on for many months of silence. A chance phrase that he
- had heard at the theatre, a whispered sneer that had reached his ears
- one night as he waited at the stage-door, had set loose a train of
- horrible thoughts. He remembered it as if it had been the lash of a
- hunting-crop across his face. His brows knit together into a wedge-like
- furrow, and with a twitch of pain he bit his under-lip.
- "You are not listening to a word I am saying, Jim," cried Sibyl, "and I
- am making the most delightful plans for your future. Do say something."
- "What do you want me to say?"
- "Oh! that you will be a good boy, and not forget us," she answered,
- smiling at him.
- He shrugged his shoulders. "You are more likely to forget me, than I am
- to forget you, Sibyl."
- She flushed. "What do you mean, Jim?" she asked.
- "You have a new friend, I hear. Who is he? Why have you not told me
- about him? He means you no good."
- "Stop, Jim!" she exclaimed. "You must not say anything against him. I
- love him."
- "Why, you don't even know his name," answered the lad. "Who is he? I
- have a right to know."
- "He is called Prince Charming. Don't you like the name? Oh! you silly
- boy! you should never forget it. If you only saw him, you would think
- him the most wonderful person in the world. Some day you will meet him:
- when you come back from Australia. You will like him so much. Everybody
- likes him, and I... love him. I wish you could come to the theatre
- to-night. He is going to be there, and I am to play Juliet. Oh! how I
- shall play it! Fancy, Jim, to be in love and play Juliet! To have him
- sitting there! To play for his delight! I am afraid I may frighten the
- company, frighten or enthrall them. To be in love is to surpass one's
- self. Poor dreadful Mr. Isaacs will be shouting 'genius' to his loafers
- at the bar. He has preached me as a dogma; to-night he will announce me
- as a revelation. I feel it. And it is all his, his only, Prince
- Charming, my wonderful lover, my god of graces. But I am poor beside
- him. Poor? What does that matter? When poverty creeps in at the door,
- love flies in through the window. Our proverbs want re-writing. They
- were made in winter, and it is summer now; spring-time for me, I think,
- a very dance of blossoms in blue skies."
- "He is a gentleman," said the lad, sullenly.
- "A Prince!" she cried, musically. "What more do you want?"
- "He wants to enslave you."
- "I shudder at the thought of being free."
- "I want you to beware of him."
- "To see him is to worship him, to know him is to trust him."
- "Sibyl, you are mad about him."
- She laughed, and took his arm. "You dear old Jim, you talk as if you
- were a hundred. Some day you will be in love yourself. Then you will
- know what it is. Don't look so sulky. Surely you should be glad to think
- that, though you are going away, you leave me happier than I have ever
- been before. Life has been hard for us both, terribly hard and
- difficult. But it will be different now. You are going to a new world,
- and I have found one. Here are two chairs; let us sit down and see the
- smart people go by."
- They took their seats amidst a crowd of watchers. The tulip-beds across
- the road flamed like throbbing rings of fire. A white dust, tremulous
- cloud of orris-root it seemed, hung in the panting air. The
- brightly-coloured parasols danced and dipped like monstrous butterflies.
- She made her brother talk of himself, his hopes, his prospects. He spoke
- slowly and with effort. They passed words to each other as players at a
- game pass counters. Sibyl felt oppressed. She could not communicate her
- joy. A faint smile curving that sullen mouth was all the echo she could
- win. After some time she became silent. Suddenly she caught a glimpse of
- golden hair and laughing lips, and in an open carriage with two ladies
- Dorian Gray drove past.
- She started to her feet. "There he is!" she cried.
- "Who?" said Jim Vane.
- "Prince Charming," she answered, looking after the victoria.
- He jumped up, and seized her roughly by the arm. "Show him to me. Which
- is he? Point him out. I must see him!" he exclaimed; but at that moment
- the Duke of Berwick's four-in-hand came between, and when it had left
- the space clear, the carriage had swept out of the Park.
- "He is gone," murmured Sibyl, sadly. "I wish you had seen him."
- "I wish I had, for as sure as there is a God in heaven, if he ever does
- you any wrong I shall kill him."
- She looked at him in horror. He repeated his words. They cut the air
- like a dagger. The people round began to gape. A lady standing close to
- her tittered.
- "Come away, Jim; come away," she whispered. He followed her doggedly, as
- she passed through the crowd. He felt glad at what he had said.
- When they reached the Achilles Statue she turned round. There was pity
- in her eyes that became laughter on her lips. She shook her head at him.
- "You are foolish, Jim, utterly foolish; a bad-tempered boy, that is all.
- How can you say such horrible things? You don't know what you are
- talking about. You are simply jealous and unkind. Ah! I wish you would
- fall in love. Love makes people good, and what you said was wicked."
- "I am sixteen," he answered, "and I know what I am about. Mother is no
- help to you. She doesn't understand how to look after you. I wish now
- that I was not going to Australia at all. I have a great mind to chuck
- the whole thing up. I would, if my articles hadn't been signed."
- "Oh, don't be so serious, Jim. You are like one of the heroes of those
- silly melodramas mother used to be so fond of acting in. I am not going
- to quarrel with you. I have seen him, and oh! to see him is perfect
- happiness. We won't quarrel. I know you would never harm anyone I love,
- would you?"
- "Not as long as you love him, I suppose," was the sullen answer.
- "I shall love him for ever!" she cried.
- "And he?"
- "For ever, too!"
- "He had better."
- She shrank from him. Then she laughed and put her hand on his arm. He
- was merely a boy.
- At the Marble Arch they hailed an omnibus, which left them close to
- their shabby home in the Euston Road. It was after five o'clock, and
- Sibyl had to lie down for a couple of hours before acting. Jim insisted
- that she should do so. He said that he would sooner part with her when
- their mother was not present. She would be sure to make a scene, and he
- detested scenes of every kind.
- In Sibyl's own room they parted. There was jealousy in the lad's heart,
- and a fierce, murderous hatred of the stranger who, as it seemed to him,
- had come between them. Yet, when her arms were flung round his neck,
- and her fingers strayed through his hair, he softened, and kissed her
- with real affection. There were tears in his eyes as he went downstairs.
- His mother was waiting for him below. She grumbled at his unpunctuality,
- as he entered. He made no answer, but sat down to his meagre meal. The
- flies buzzed round the table, and crawled over the stained cloth.
- Through the rumble of omnibuses, and the clatter of street-cabs, he
- could hear the droning voice devouring each minute that was left to him.
- After some time, he thrust away his plate, and put his head in his
- hands. He felt that he had a right to know. It should have been told to
- him before, if it was as he suspected. Leaden with fear, his mother
- watched him. Words dropped mechanically from her lips. A tattered lace
- handkerchief twitched in her fingers. When the clock struck six, he got
- up, and went to the door. Then he turned back, and looked at her. Their
- eyes met. In hers he saw a wild appeal for mercy. It enraged him.
- "Mother, I have something to ask you," he said. Her eyes wandered
- vaguely about the room. She made no answer. "Tell me the truth. I have a
- right to know. Were you married to my father?"
- She heaved a deep sigh. It was a sigh of relief. The terrible moment,
- the moment that night and day, for weeks and months, she had dreaded,
- had come at last, and yet she felt no terror. Indeed in some measure it
- was a disappointment to her. The vulgar directness of the question
- called for a direct answer. The situation had not been gradually led up
- to. It was crude. It reminded her of a bad rehearsal.
- "No," she answered, wondering at the harsh simplicity of life.
- "My father was a scoundrel then?" cried the lad, clenching his fists.
- She shook her head. "I knew he was not free. We loved each other very
- much. If he had lived, he would have made provision for us. Don't speak
- against him, my son. He was your father, and a gentleman. Indeed he was
- highly connected."
- An oath broke from his lips. "I don't care for myself," he exclaimed,
- "but don't let Sibyl.... It is a gentleman, isn't it, who is in love
- with her, or says he is? Highly connected, too, I suppose."
- For a moment a hideous sense of humiliation came over the woman. Her
- head drooped. She wiped her eyes with shaking hands. "Sibyl has a
- mother," she murmured; "I had none."
- The lad was touched. He went towards her, and stooping down he kissed
- her. "I am sorry if I have pained you by asking about my father," he
- said, "but I could not help it. I must go now. Good-bye. Don't forget
- that you will only have one child now to look after, and believe me that
- if this man wrongs my sister, I will find out who he is, track him down,
- and kill him like a dog. I swear it."
- The exaggerated folly of the threat, the passionate gesture that
- accompanied it, the mad melodramatic words, made life seem more vivid to
- her. She was familiar with the atmosphere. She breathed more freely, and
- for the first time for many months she really admired her son. She would
- have liked to have continued the scene on the same emotional scale, but
- he cut her short. Trunks had to be carried down, and mufflers looked
- for. The lodging-house drudge bustled in and out. There was the
- bargaining with the cabman. The moment was lost in vulgar details. It
- was with a renewed feeling of disappointment that she waved the tattered
- lace handkerchief from the window, as her son drove away. She was
- conscious that a great opportunity had been wasted. She consoled herself
- by telling Sibyl how desolate she felt her life would be, now that she
- had only one child to look after. She remembered the phrase. It had
- pleased her. Of the threat she said nothing. It was vividly and
- dramatically expressed. She felt that they would all laugh at it some
- day.
- CHAPTER VI
- "I suppose you have heard the news, Basil?" said Lord Henry that
- evening, as Hallward was shown into a little private room at the Bristol
- where dinner had been laid for three.
- "No, Harry," answered the artist, giving his hat and coat to the bowing
- waiter. "What is it? Nothing about politics, I hope? They don't interest
- me. There is hardly a single person in the House of Commons worth
- painting; though many of them would be the better for a little
- white-washing."
- "Dorian Gray is engaged to be married," said Lord Henry, watching him as
- he spoke.
- Hallward started, and then frowned. "Dorian engaged to be married!" he
- cried. "Impossible!"
- "It is perfectly true."
- "To whom?"
- "To some little actress or other."
- "I can't believe it. Dorian is far too sensible."
- "Dorian is far too wise not to do foolish things now and then, my dear
- Basil."
- "Marriage is hardly a thing that one can do now and then, Harry."
- "Except in America," rejoined Lord Henry, languidly. "But I didn't say
- he was married. I said he was engaged to be married. There is a great
- difference. I have a distinct remembrance of being married, but I have
- no recollection at all of being engaged. I am inclined to think that I
- never was engaged."
- "But think of Dorian's birth, and position, and wealth. It would be
- absurd for him to marry so much beneath him."
- "If you want to make him marry this girl tell him that, Basil. He is
- sure to do it, then. Whenever a man does a thoroughly stupid thing, it
- is always from the noblest motives."
- "I hope the girl is good, Harry. I don't want to see Dorian tied to some
- vile creature, who might degrade his nature and ruin his intellect."
- "Oh, she is better than good--she is beautiful," murmured Lord Henry,
- sipping a glass of vermouth and orange-bitters. "Dorian says she is
- beautiful; and he is not often wrong about things of that kind. Your
- portrait of him has quickened his appreciation of the personal
- appearance of other people. It has had that excellent effect, amongst
- others. We are to see her to-night, if that boy doesn't forget his
- appointment."
- "Are you serious?"
- "Quite serious, Basil. I should be miserable if I thought I should ever
- be more serious than I am at the present moment."
- "But do you approve of it, Harry?" asked the painter, walking up and
- down the room, and biting his lip. "You can't approve of it, possibly.
- It is some silly infatuation."
- "I never approve, or disapprove, of anything now. It is an absurd
- attitude to take towards life. We are not sent into the world to air our
- moral prejudices. I never take any notice of what common people say, and
- I never interfere with what charming people do. If a personality
- fascinates me, whatever mode of expression that personality selects is
- absolutely delightful to me. Dorian Gray falls in love with a beautiful
- girl who acts Juliet, and proposes to marry her. Why not? If he wedded
- Messalina he would be none the less interesting. You know I am not a
- champion of marriage. The real drawback to marriage is that it makes one
- unselfish. And unselfish people are colourless. They lack
- individuality. Still, there are certain temperaments that marriage
- makes more complex. They retain their egotism, and add to it many other
- egos. They are forced to have more than one life. They become more
- highly organised, and to be highly organised is, I should fancy, the
- object of man's existence. Besides, every experience is of value, and,
- whatever one may say against marriage, it is certainly an experience. I
- hope that Dorian Gray will make this girl his wife, passionately adore
- her for six months, and then suddenly become fascinated by someone else.
- He would be a wonderful study."
- "You don't mean a single word of all that, Harry; you know you don't. If
- Dorian Gray's life were spoiled, no one would be sorrier than yourself.
- You are much better than you pretend to be."
- Lord Henry laughed. "The reason we all like to think so well of others
- is that we are all afraid for ourselves. The basis of optimism is sheer
- terror. We think that we are generous because we credit our neighbour
- with the possession of those virtues that are likely to be a benefit to
- us. We praise the banker that we may overdraw our account, and find good
- qualities in the highwayman in the hope that he may spare our pockets. I
- mean everything that I have said. I have the greatest contempt for
- optimism. As for a spoiled life, no life is spoiled but one whose growth
- is arrested. If you want to mar a nature, you have merely to reform it.
- As for marriage, of course that would be silly, but there are other and
- more interesting bonds between men and women. I will certainly encourage
- them. They have the charm of being fashionable. But here is Dorian
- himself. He will tell you more than I can."
- "My dear Harry, my dear Basil, you must both congratulate me!" said the
- lad, throwing off his evening cape with its satin-lined wings and
- shaking each of his friends by the hand in turn. "I have never been so
- happy. Of course it is sudden; all really delightful things are. And
- yet it seems to me to be the one thing I have been looking for all my
- life." He was flushed with excitement and pleasure, and looked
- extraordinarily handsome.
- "I hope you will always be very happy, Dorian," said Hallward, "but I
- don't quite forgive you for not having let me know of your engagement.
- You let Harry know."
- "And I don't forgive you for being late for dinner," broke in Lord
- Henry, putting his hand on the lad's shoulder, and smiling as he spoke.
- "Come, let us sit down and try what the new _chef_ here is like, and
- then you will tell us how it all came about."
- "There is really not much to tell," cried Dorian, as they took their
- seats at the small round table. "What happened was simply this. After I
- left you yesterday evening, Harry, I dressed, had some dinner at that
- little Italian restaurant in Rupert Street you introduced me to, and
- went down at eight o'clock to the theatre. Sibyl was playing Rosalind.
- Of course the scenery was dreadful, and the Orlando absurd. But Sibyl!
- You should have seen her! When she came on in her boy's clothes she was
- perfectly wonderful. She wore a moss-coloured velvet jerkin with
- cinnamon sleeves, slim brown cross-gartered hose, a dainty little green
- cap with a hawk's feather caught in a jewel, and a hooded cloak lined
- with dull red. She had never seemed to me more exquisite. She had all
- the delicate grace of that Tanagra figurine that you have in your
- studio, Basil. Her hair clustered round her face like dark leaves round
- a pale rose. As for her acting--well, you shall see her to-night. She is
- simply a born artist. I sat in the dingy box absolutely enthralled. I
- forgot that I was in London and in the nineteenth century. I was away
- with my love in a forest that no man had ever seen. After the
- performance was over I went behind, and spoke to her. As we were sitting
- together, suddenly there came into her eyes a look that I had never seen
- there before. My lips moved towards hers. We kissed each other. I can't
- describe to you what I felt at that moment. It seemed to me that all my
- life had been narrowed to one perfect point of rose-coloured joy. She
- trembled all over, and shook like a white narcissus. Then she flung
- herself on her knees and kissed my hands. I feel that I should not tell
- you all this, but I can't help it. Of course our engagement is a dead
- secret. She has not even told her own mother. I don't know what my
- guardians will say. Lord Radley is sure to be furious. I don't care. I
- shall be of age in less than a year, and then I can do what I like. I
- have been right, Basil, haven't I, to take my love out of poetry, and to
- find my wife in Shakespeare's plays? Lips that Shakespeare taught to
- speak have whispered their secret in my ear. I have had the arms of
- Rosalind around me, and kissed Juliet on the mouth."
- "Yes, Dorian, I suppose you were right," said Hallward, slowly.
- "Have you seen her to-day?" asked Lord Henry.
- Dorian Gray shook his head. "I left her in the forest of Arden, I shall
- find her in an orchard in Verona."
- Lord Henry sipped his champagne in a meditative manner. "At what
- particular point did you mention the word marriage, Dorian? And what did
- she say in answer? Perhaps you forgot all about it."
- "My dear Harry, I did not treat it as a business transaction, and I did
- not make any formal proposal. I told her that I loved her, and she said
- she was not worthy to be my wife. Not worthy! Why, the whole world is
- nothing to me compared with her."
- "Women are wonderfully practical," murmured Lord Henry--"much more
- practical than we are. In situations of that kind we often forget to say
- anything about marriage, and they always remind us."
- Hallward laid his hand upon his arm. "Don't, Harry. You have annoyed
- Dorian. He is not like other men. He would never bring misery upon
- anyone. His nature is too fine for that."
- Lord Henry looked across the table. "Dorian is never annoyed with me,"
- he answered. "I asked the question for the best reason possible, for the
- only reason, indeed, that excuses one for asking any question--simple
- curiosity. I have a theory that it is always the women who propose to
- us, and not we who propose to the women. Except, of course, in
- middle-class life. But then the middle classes are not modern."
- Dorian Gray laughed, and tossed his head. "You are quite incorrigible,
- Harry; but I don't mind. It is impossible to be angry with you. When you
- see Sibyl Vane you will feel that the man who could wrong her would be a
- beast, a beast without a heart. I cannot understand how anyone can wish
- to shame the thing he loves. I love Sibyl Vane. I want to place her on a
- pedestal of gold, and to see the world worship the woman who is mine.
- What is marriage? An irrevocable vow. You mock at it for that. Ah! don't
- mock. It is an irrevocable vow that I want to take. Her trust makes me
- faithful, her belief makes me good. When I am with her, I regret all
- that you have taught me. I become different from what you have known me
- to be. I am changed, and the mere touch of Sibyl Vane's hand makes me
- forget you and all your wrong, fascinating, poisonous, delightful
- theories."
- "And those are...?" asked Lord Henry, helping himself to some salad.
- "Oh, your theories about life, your theories about love, your theories
- about pleasure. All your theories, in fact, Harry."
- "Pleasure is the only thing worth having a theory about," he answered,
- in his slow, melodious voice. "But I am afraid I cannot claim my theory
- as my own. It belongs to Nature, not to me. Pleasure is Nature's test,
- her sign of approval. When we are happy we are always good, but when we
- are good we are not always happy."
- "Ah! but what do you mean by good?" cried Basil Hallward.
- "Yes," echoed Dorian, leaning back in his chair, and looking at Lord
- Henry over the heavy clusters of purple-lipped irises that stood in the
- centre of the table, "what do you mean by good, Harry?"
- "To be good is to be in harmony with one's self," he replied, touching
- the thin stem of his glass with his pale, fine-pointed fingers. "Discord
- is to be forced to be in harmony with others. One's own life--that is
- the important thing. As for the lives of one's neighbours, if one wishes
- to be a prig or a Puritan, one can flaunt one's moral views about them,
- but they are not one's concern. Besides, Individualism has really the
- higher aim. Modern morality consists in accepting the standard of one's
- age. I consider that for any man of culture to accept the standard of
- his age is a form of the grossest immorality."
- "But, surely, if one lives merely for one's self, Harry, one pays a
- terrible price for doing so?" suggested the painter.
- "Yes, we are overcharged for everything nowadays. I should fancy that
- the real tragedy of the poor is that they can afford nothing but
- self-denial. Beautiful sins, like beautiful things, are the privilege of
- the rich."
- "One has to pay in other ways but money."
- "What sort of ways, Basil?"
- "Oh! I should fancy in remorse, in suffering, in... well, in the
- consciousness of degradation."
- Lord Henry shrugged his shoulders. "My dear fellow, mediæval art is
- charming, but mediæval emotions are out of date. One can use them in
- fiction, of course. But then the only things that one can use in fiction
- are the things that one has ceased to use in fact. Believe me, no
- civilised man ever regrets a pleasure, and no uncivilised man ever
- knows what a pleasure is."
- "I know what pleasure is," cried Dorian Gray. "It is to adore someone."
- "That is certainly better than being adored," he answered, toying with
- some fruits. "Being adored is a nuisance. Women treat us just as
- Humanity treats its gods. They worship us, and are always bothering us
- to do something for them."
- "I should have said that whatever they ask for they had first given to
- us," murmured the lad, gravely. "They create Love in our natures. They
- have a right to demand it back."
- "That is quite true, Dorian," cried Hallward.
- "Nothing is ever quite true," said Lord Henry.
- "This is," interrupted Dorian. "You must admit, Harry, that women give
- to men the very gold of their lives."
- "Possibly," he sighed, "but they invariably want it back in such very
- small change. That is the worry. Women, as some witty Frenchman once put
- it, inspire us with the desire to do masterpieces, and always prevent us
- from carrying them out."
- "Harry, you are dreadful! I don't know why I like you so much."
- "You will always like me, Dorian," he replied. "Will you have some
- coffee, you fellows?--Waiter, bring coffee, and _fine-champagne_, and
- some cigarettes. No: don't mind the cigarettes; I have some. Basil, I
- can't allow you to smoke cigars. You must have a cigarette. A cigarette
- is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite, and it
- leaves one unsatisfied. What more can one want? Yes, Dorian, you will
- always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you have never had
- the courage to commit."
- "What nonsense you talk, Harry!" cried the lad, taking a light from a
- fire-breathing silver dragon that the waiter had placed on the table.
- "Let us go down to the theatre. When Sibyl comes on the stage you will
- have a new ideal of life. She will represent something to you that you
- have never known."
- "I have known everything," said Lord Henry, with a tired look in his
- eyes, "but I am always ready for a new emotion. I am afraid, however,
- that, for me at any rate, there is no such thing. Still, your wonderful
- girl may thrill me. I love acting. It is so much more real than life.
- Let us go. Dorian, you will come with me. I am so sorry, Basil, but
- there is only room for two in the brougham. You must follow us in a
- hansom."
- They got up and put on their coats, sipping their coffee standing. The
- painter was silent and preoccupied. There was a gloom over him. He could
- not bear this marriage, and yet it seemed to him to be better than many
- other things that might have happened. After a few minutes, they all
- passed downstairs. He drove off by himself, as had been arranged, and
- watched the flashing lights of the little brougham in front of him. A
- strange sense of loss came over him. He felt that Dorian Gray would
- never again be to him all that he had been in the past. Life had come
- between them.... His eyes darkened, and the crowded, flaring streets
- became blurred to his eyes. When the cab drew up at the theatre, it
- seemed to him that he had grown years older.
- CHAPTER VII
- For some reason or other, the house was crowded that night, and the fat
- Jew manager who met them at the door was beaming from ear to ear with an
- oily, tremulous smile. He escorted them to their box with a sort of
- pompous humility, waving his fat jewelled hands, and talking at the top
- of his voice. Dorian Gray loathed him more than ever. He felt as if he
- had come to look for Miranda and had been met by Caliban. Lord Henry,
- upon the other hand, rather liked him. At least he declared he did, and
- insisted on shaking him by the hand, and assuring him that he was proud
- to meet a man who had discovered a real genius and gone bankrupt over a
- poet. Hallward amused himself with watching the faces in the pit. The
- heat was terribly oppressive, and the huge sunlight flamed like a
- monstrous dahlia with petals of yellow fire. The youths in the gallery
- had taken off their coats and waistcoats and hung them over the side.
- They talked to each other across the theatre, and shared their oranges
- with the tawdry girls who sat beside them. Some women were laughing in
- the pit. Their voices were horribly shrill and discordant. The sound of
- the popping of corks came from the bar.
- "What a place to find one's divinity in!" said Lord Henry.
- "Yes!" answered Dorian Gray. "It was here I found her, and she is divine
- beyond all living things. When she acts you will forget everything.
- These common, rough people, with their coarse faces and brutal gestures,
- become quite different when she is on the stage. They sit silently and
- watch her. They weep and laugh as she wills them to do. She makes them
- as responsive as a violin. She spiritualises them, and one feels that
- they are of the same flesh and blood as one's self."
- "The same flesh and blood as one's self! Oh, I hope not!" exclaimed Lord
- Henry, who was scanning the occupants of the gallery through his
- opera-glass.
- "Don't pay any attention to him, Dorian," said the painter. "I
- understand what you mean, and I believe in this girl. Anyone you love
- must be marvellous, and any girl that has the effect you describe must
- be fine and noble. To spiritualise one's age--that is something worth
- doing. If this girl can give a soul to those who have lived without one,
- if she can create the sense of beauty in people whose lives have been
- sordid and ugly, if she can strip them of their selfishness and lend
- them tears for sorrows that are not their own, she is worthy of all your
- adoration, worthy of the adoration of the world. This marriage is quite
- right. I did not think so at first, but I admit it now. The gods made
- Sibyl Vane for you. Without her you would have been incomplete."
- "Thanks, Basil," answered Dorian Gray, pressing his hand. "I knew that
- you would understand me. Harry is so cynical, he terrifies me. But here
- is the orchestra. It is quite dreadful, but it only lasts for about five
- minutes. Then the curtain rises, and you will see the girl to whom I am
- going to give all my life, to whom I have given everything that is good
- in me."
- A quarter of an hour afterwards, amidst an extraordinary turmoil of
- applause, Sibyl Vane stepped on to the stage. Yes, she was certainly
- lovely to look at--one of the loveliest creatures, Lord Henry thought,
- that he had ever seen. There was something of the fawn in her shy grace
- and startled eyes. A faint blush, like the shadow of a rose in a mirror
- of silver, came to her cheeks as she glanced at the crowded,
- enthusiastic house. She stepped back a few paces, and her lips seemed
- to tremble. Basil Hallward leaped to his feet and began to applaud.
- Motionless, and as one in a dream, sat Dorian Gray, gazing at her. Lord
- Henry peered through his glasses, murmuring, "Charming! charming!"
- The scene was the hall of Capulet's house, and Romeo in his pilgrim's
- dress had entered with Mercutio and his other friends. The band, such as
- it was, struck up a few bars of music, and the dance began. Through the
- crowd of ungainly, shabbily-dressed actors, Sibyl Vane moved like a
- creature from a finer world. Her body swayed, while she danced, as a
- plant sways in the water. The curves of her throat were the curves of a
- white lily. Her hands seemed to be made of cool ivory.
- Yet she was curiously listless. She showed no sign of joy when her eyes
- rested on Romeo. The few words she had to speak--
- Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much,
- Which mannerly devotion shows in this;
- For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch,
- And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss--
- with the brief dialogue that follows, were spoken in a thoroughly
- artificial manner. The voice was exquisite, but from the point of view
- of tone it was absolutely false. It was wrong in colour. It took away
- all the life from the verse. It made the passion unreal.
- Dorian Gray grew pale as he watched her. He was puzzled and anxious.
- Neither of his friends dared to say anything to him. She seemed to them
- to be absolutely incompetent. They were horribly disappointed.
- Yet they felt that the true test of any Juliet is the balcony scene of
- the second act. They waited for that. If she failed there, there was
- nothing in her.
- She looked charming as she came out in the moonlight. That could not be
- denied. But the staginess of her acting was unbearable, and grew worse
- as she went on. Her gestures became absurdly artificial. She
- over-emphasised everything that she had to say. The beautiful passage--
- Thou knowest the mask of night is on my face,
- Else would a maiden blush bepaint my cheek
- For that which thou hast heard me speak to-night--
- was declaimed with the painful precision of a schoolgirl who has been
- taught to recite by some second-rate professor of elocution. When she
- leaned over the balcony and came to those wonderful lines--
- Although I joy in thee,
- I have no joy of this contract to-night:
- It is too rash, too unadvised, too sudden;
- Too like the lightning, which doth cease to be
- Ere one can say, "It lightens." Sweet, good-night!
- This bud of love by summer's ripening breath
- May prove a beauteous flower when next we meet--
- she spoke the words as though they conveyed no meaning to her. It was
- not nervousness. Indeed, so far from being nervous, she was absolutely
- self-contained. It was simply bad art. She was a complete failure.
- Even the common, uneducated audience of the pit and gallery lost their
- interest in the play. They got restless, and began to talk loudly and to
- whistle. The Jew manager, who was standing at the back of the
- dress-circle, stamped and swore with rage. The only person unmoved was
- the girl herself.
- When the second act was over there came a storm of hisses, and Lord
- Henry got up from his chair and put on his coat. "She is quite
- beautiful, Dorian," he said, "but she can't act. Let us go."
- "I am going to see the play through," answered the lad, in a hard,
- bitter voice. "I am awfully sorry that I have made you waste an evening,
- Harry. I apologise to you both."
- "My dear Dorian, I should think Miss Vane was ill," interrupted
- Hallward. "We will come some other night."
- "I wish she were ill," he rejoined. "But she seems to me to be simply
- callous and cold. She has entirely altered. Last night she was a great
- artist. This evening she is merely a commonplace, mediocre actress."
- "Don't talk like that about anyone you love, Dorian. Love is a more
- wonderful thing than Art."
- "They are both simply forms of imitation," remarked Lord Henry. "But do
- let us go. Dorian, you must not stay here any longer. It is not good for
- one's morals to see bad acting. Besides, I don't suppose you will want
- your wife to act. So what does it matter if she plays Juliet like a
- wooden doll? She is very lovely, and if she knows as little about life
- as she does about acting, she will be a delightful experience. There are
- only two kinds of people who are really fascinating--people who know
- absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing. Good
- heavens, my dear boy, don't look so tragic! The secret of remaining
- young is never to have an emotion that is unbecoming. Come to the club
- with Basil and myself. We will smoke cigarettes and drink to the beauty
- of Sibyl Vane. She is beautiful. What more can you want?"
- "Go away, Harry," cried the lad. "I want to be alone. Basil, you must
- go. Ah! can't you see that my heart is breaking?" The hot tears came to
- his eyes. His lips trembled, and, rushing to the back of the box, he
- leaned up against the wall, hiding his face in his hands.
- "Let us go, Basil," said Lord Henry, with a strange tenderness in his
- voice; and the two young men passed out together.
- A few moments afterwards the footlights flared up, and the curtain rose
- on the third act. Dorian Gray went back to his seat. He looked pale, and
- proud, and indifferent. The play dragged on, and seemed interminable.
- Half of the audience went out, tramping in heavy boots, and laughing.
- The whole thing was a _fiasco_. The last act was played to almost empty
- benches. The curtain went down on a titter, and some groans.
- As soon as it was over, Dorian Gray rushed behind the scenes into the
- greenroom. The girl was standing there alone, with a look of triumph on
- her face. Her eyes were lit with an exquisite fire. There was a radiance
- about her. Her parted lips were smiling over some secret of their own.
- When he entered, she looked at him, and an expression of infinite joy
- came over her. "How badly I acted to-night, Dorian!" she cried.
- "Horribly!" he answered, gazing at her in amazement--"horribly! It was
- dreadful. Are you ill? You have no idea what it was. You have no idea
- what I suffered."
- The girl smiled. "Dorian," she answered, lingering over his name with
- long-drawn music in her voice, as though it were sweeter than honey to
- the red petals of her mouth--"Dorian, you should have understood. But
- you understand now, don't you?"
- "Understand what?" he asked, angrily.
- "Why I was so bad to-night. Why I shall always be bad. Why I shall never
- act well again."
- He shrugged his shoulders. "You are ill, I suppose. When you are ill you
- shouldn't act. You make yourself ridiculous. My friends were bored. I
- was bored."
- She seemed not to listen to him. She was transfigured with joy. An
- ecstasy of happiness dominated her.
- "Dorian, Dorian," she cried, "before I knew you, acting was the one
- reality of my life. It was only in the theatre that I lived. I thought
- that it was all true. I was Rosalind one night, and Portia the other.
- The joy of Beatrice was my joy, and the sorrows of Cordelia were mine
- also. I believed in everything. The common people who acted with me
- seemed to me to be godlike. The painted scenes were my world. I knew
- nothing but shadows, and I thought them real. You came--oh, my beautiful
- love!--and you freed my soul from prison. You taught me what reality
- really is. To-night, for the first time in my life, I saw through the
- hollowness, the sham, the silliness of the empty pageant in which I had
- always played. To-night, for the first time, I became conscious that the
- Romeo was hideous, and old, and painted, that the moonlight in the
- orchard was false, that the scenery was vulgar, and that the words I had
- to speak were unreal, were not my words, were not what I wanted to say.
- You had brought me something higher, something of which all art is but a
- reflection. You had made me understand what love really is. My love! my
- love! Prince Charming! Prince of life! I have grown sick of shadows. You
- are more to me than all art can ever be. What have I to do with the
- puppets of a play? When I came on to-night, I could not understand how
- it was that everything had gone from me. I thought that I was going to
- be wonderful. I found that I could do nothing. Suddenly it dawned on my
- soul what it all meant. The knowledge was exquisite to me. I heard them
- hissing, and I smiled. What could they know of love such as ours? Take
- me away, Dorian--take me away with you, where we can be quite alone. I
- hate the stage. I might mimic a passion that I do not feel, but I cannot
- mimic one that burns me like fire. Oh, Dorian, Dorian, you understand
- now what it signifies? Even if I could do it, it would be profanation
- for me to play at being in love. You have made me see that."
- He flung himself down on the sofa, and turned away his face. "You have
- killed my love," he muttered.
- She looked at him in wonder, and laughed. He made no answer. She came
- across to him, and with her little fingers stroked his hair. She knelt
- down and pressed his hands to her lips. He drew them away, and a shudder
- ran through him.
- Then he leaped up, and went to the door. "Yes," he cried, "you have
- killed my love. You used to stir my imagination. Now you don't even stir
- my curiosity. You simply produce no effect. I loved you because you
- were marvellous, because you had genius and intellect, because you
- realised the dreams of great poets and gave shape and substance to the
- shadows of art. You have thrown it all away. You are shallow and stupid.
- My God! how mad I was to love you! What a fool I have been! You are
- nothing to me now. I will never see you again. I will never think of
- you. I will never mention your name. You don't know what you were to me,
- once. Why, once.... Oh, I can't bear to think of it! I wish I had never
- laid eyes upon you! You have spoiled the romance of my life. How little
- you can know of love, if you say it mars your art! Without your art you
- are nothing. I would have made you famous, splendid, magnificent. The
- world would have worshipped you, and you would have borne my name. What
- are you now? A third-rate actress with a pretty face."
- The girl grew white, and trembled. She clenched her hands together, and
- her voice seemed to catch in her throat. "You are not serious, Dorian?"
- she murmured. "You are acting."
- "Acting! I leave that to you. You do it so well," he answered bitterly.
- She rose from her knees, and, with a piteous expression of pain in her
- face, came across the room to him. She put her hand upon his arm, and
- looked into his eyes. He thrust her back. "Don't touch me!" he cried.
- A low moan broke from her, and she flung herself at his feet, and lay
- there like a trampled flower. "Dorian, Dorian, don't leave me!" she
- whispered. "I am so sorry I didn't act well. I was thinking of you all
- the time. But I will try--indeed, I will try. It came so suddenly across
- me, my love for you. I think I should never have known it if you had not
- kissed me--if we had not kissed each other. Kiss me again, my love.
- Don't go away from me. I couldn't bear it. Oh! don't go away from me. My
- brother.... No; never mind. He didn't mean it. He was in jest.... But
- you, oh! can't you forgive me for to-night? I will work so hard, and try
- to improve. Don't be cruel to me because I love you better than anything
- in the world. After all, it is only once that I have not pleased you.
- But you are quite right, Dorian. I should have shown myself more of an
- artist. It was foolish of me; and yet I couldn't help it. Oh, don't
- leave me, don't leave me." A fit of passionate sobbing choked her. She
- crouched on the floor like a wounded thing, and Dorian Gray, with his
- beautiful eyes, looked down at her, and his chiselled lips curled in
- exquisite disdain. There is always something ridiculous about the
- emotions of people whom one has ceased to love. Sibyl Vane seemed to him
- to be absurdly melodramatic. Her tears and sobs annoyed him.
- "I am going," he said at last, in his calm, clear voice. "I don't wish
- to be unkind, but I can't see you again. You have disappointed me."
- She wept silently, and made no answer, but crept nearer. Her little
- hands stretched blindly out, and appeared to be seeking for him. He
- turned on his heel, and left the room. In a few moments he was out of
- the theatre.
- Where he went to he hardly knew. He remembered wandering through
- dimly-lit streets, past gaunt black-shadowed archways and evil-looking
- houses. Women with hoarse voices and harsh laughter had called after
- him. Drunkards had reeled by cursing, and chattering to themselves like
- monstrous apes. He had seen grotesque children huddled upon doorsteps,
- and heard shrieks and oaths from gloomy courts.
- As the dawn was just breaking he found himself close to Covent Garden.
- The darkness lifted, and, flushed with faint fires, the sky hollowed
- itself into a perfect pearl. Huge carts filled with nodding lilies
- rumbled slowly down the polished empty street. The air was heavy with
- the perfume of the flowers, and their beauty seemed to bring him an
- anodyne for his pain. He followed into the market, and watched the men
- unloading their waggons. A white-smocked carter offered him some
- cherries. He thanked him, and wondered why he refused to accept any
- money for them, and began to eat them listlessly. They had been plucked
- at midnight, and the coldness of the moon had entered into them. A long
- line of boys carrying crates of striped tulips, and of yellow and red
- roses, defiled in front of him, threading their way through the huge
- jade-green piles of vegetables. Under the portico, with its grey
- sun-bleached pillars, loitered a troop of draggled bareheaded girls,
- waiting for the auction to be over. Others crowded round the swinging
- doors of the coffee-house in the Piazza. The heavy cart-horses slipped
- and stamped upon the rough stones, shaking their bells and trappings.
- Some of the drivers were lying asleep on a pile of sacks. Iris-necked,
- and pink-footed, the pigeons ran about picking up seeds.
- After a little while, he hailed a hansom, and drove home. For a few
- moments he loitered upon the doorstep, looking round at the silent
- Square with its blank, close-shuttered windows, and its staring blinds.
- The sky was pure opal now, and the roofs of the houses glistened like
- silver against it. From some chimney opposite a thin wreath of smoke was
- rising. It curled, a violet riband, through the nacre-coloured air.
- In the huge gilt Venetian lantern, spoil of some Doge's barge, that hung
- from the ceiling of the great oak-panelled hall of entrance, lights were
- still burning from three flickering jets: thin blue petals of flame they
- seemed, rimmed with white fire. He turned them out, and, having thrown
- his hat and cape on the table, passed through the library towards the
- door of his bedroom, a large octagonal chamber on the ground floor that,
- in his new-born feeling for luxury, he had just had decorated for
- himself, and hung with some curious Renaissance tapestries that had been
- discovered stored in a disused attic at Selby Royal. As he was turning
- the handle of the door, his eye fell upon the portrait Basil Hallward
- had painted of him. He started back as if in surprise. Then he went on
- into his own room, looking somewhat puzzled. After he had taken the
- buttonhole out of his coat, he seemed to hesitate. Finally he came back,
- went over to the picture, and examined it. In the dim arrested light
- that struggled through the cream-coloured silk blinds, the face appeared
- to him to be a little changed. The expression looked different. One
- would have said that there was a touch of cruelty in the mouth. It was
- certainly strange.
- He turned round, and, walking to the window, drew up the blind. The
- bright dawn flooded the room, and swept the fantastic shadows into dusky
- corners, where they lay shuddering. But the strange expression that he
- had noticed in the face of the portrait seemed to linger there, to be
- more intensified even. The quivering, ardent sunlight showed him the
- lines of cruelty round the mouth as clearly as if he had been looking
- into a mirror after he had done some dreadful thing.
- He winced, and, taking up from the table an oval glass framed in ivory
- Cupids, one of Lord Henry's many presents to him, glanced hurriedly into
- its polished depths. No line like that warped his red lips. What did it
- mean?
- He rubbed his eyes, and came close to the picture, and examined it
- again. There were no signs of any change when he looked into the actual
- painting, and yet there was no doubt that the whole expression had
- altered. It was not a mere fancy of his own. The thing was horribly
- apparent.
- He threw himself into a chair, and began to think. Suddenly there
- flashed across his mind what he had said in Basil Hallward's studio the
- day the picture had been finished. Yes, he remembered it perfectly. He
- had uttered a mad wish that he himself might remain young, and the
- portrait grow old; that his own beauty might be untarnished, and the
- face on the canvas bear the burden of his passions and his sins; that
- the painted image might be seared with the lines of suffering and
- thought, and that he might keep all the delicate bloom and loveliness of
- his then just conscious boyhood. Surely his wish had not been fulfilled?
- Such things were impossible. It seemed monstrous even to think of them.
- And, yet, there was the picture before him, with the touch of cruelty in
- the mouth.
- Cruelty! Had he been cruel? It was the girl's fault, not his. He had
- dreamed of her as a great artist, had given his love to her because he
- had thought her great. Then she had disappointed him. She had been
- shallow and unworthy. And, yet, a feeling of infinite regret came over
- him, as he thought of her lying at his feet sobbing like a little child.
- He remembered with what callousness he had watched her. Why had he been
- made like that? Why had such a soul been given to him? But he had
- suffered also. During the three terrible hours that the play had lasted,
- he had lived centuries of pain, æon upon æon of torture. His life was
- well worth hers. She had marred him for a moment, if he had wounded her
- for an age. Besides, women were better suited to bear sorrow than men.
- They lived on their emotions. They only thought of their emotions. When
- they took lovers, it was merely to have someone with whom they could
- have scenes. Lord Henry had told him that, and Lord Henry knew what
- women were. Why should he trouble about Sibyl Vane? She was nothing to
- him now.
- But the picture? What was he to say of that? It held the secret of his
- life, and told his story. It had taught him to love his own beauty.
- Would it teach him to loathe his own soul? Would he ever look at it
- again?
- No; it was merely an illusion wrought on the troubled senses. The
- horrible night that he had passed had left phantoms behind it. Suddenly
- there had fallen upon his brain that tiny scarlet speck that makes men
- mad. The picture had not changed. It was folly to think so.
- Yet it was watching him, with its beautiful marred face and its cruel
- smile. Its bright hair gleamed in the early sunlight. Its blue eyes met
- his own. A sense of infinite pity, not for himself, but for the painted
- image of himself, came over him. It had altered already, and would alter
- more. Its gold would wither into grey. Its red and white roses would
- die. For every sin that he committed, a stain would fleck and wreck its
- fairness. But he would not sin. The picture, changed or unchanged, would
- be to him the visible emblem of conscience. He would resist temptation.
- He would not see Lord Henry any more--would not, at any rate, listen to
- those subtle poisonous theories that in Basil Hallward's garden had
- first stirred within him the passion for impossible things. He would go
- back to Sibyl Vane, make her amends, marry her, try to love her again.
- Yes, it was his duty to do so. She must have suffered more than he had.
- Poor child! He had been selfish and cruel to her. The fascination that
- she had exercised over him would return. They would be happy together.
- His life with her would be beautiful and pure.
- He got up from his chair, and drew a large screen right in front of the
- portrait, shuddering as he glanced at it. "How horrible!" he murmured to
- himself, and he walked across to the window and opened it. When he
- stepped out on to the grass, he drew a deep breath. The fresh morning
- air seemed to drive away all his sombre passions. He thought only of
- Sibyl. A faint echo of his love came back to him. He repeated her name
- over and over again. The birds that were singing in the dew-drenched
- garden seemed to be telling the flowers about her.
- CHAPTER VIII
- It was long past noon when he awoke. His valet had crept several times
- on tiptoe into the room to see if he was stirring, and had wondered what
- made his young master sleep so late. Finally his bell sounded, and
- Victor came softly in with a cup of tea, and a pile of letters, on a
- small tray of old Sèvres china, and drew back the olive-satin curtains,
- with their shimmering blue lining, that hung in front of the three tall
- windows.
- "Monsieur has well slept this morning," he said, smiling.
- "What o'clock is it, Victor?" asked Dorian Gray, drowsily.
- "One hour and a quarter, Monsieur."
- How late it was! He sat up, and, having sipped some tea, turned over his
- letters. One of them was from Lord Henry, and had been brought by hand
- that morning. He hesitated for a moment, and then put it aside. The
- others he opened listlessly. They contained the usual collection of
- cards, invitations to dinner, tickets for private views, programmes of
- charity concerts, and the like, that are showered on fashionable young
- men every morning during the season. There was a rather heavy bill, for
- a chased silver Louis-Quinze toilet-set, that he had not yet had the
- courage to send on to his guardians, who were extremely old-fashioned
- people and did not realise that we live in an age when unnecessary
- things are our only necessities; and there were several very courteously
- worded communiations from Jermyn Street money-lenders offering to
- advance any sum of money at a moment's notice and at the most reasonable
- rates of interest.
- After about ten minutes he got up, and, throwing on an elaborate
- dressing-gown of silk-embroidered cashmere wool, passed into the
- onyx-paved bathroom. The cool water refreshed him after his long sleep.
- He seemed to have forgotten all that he had gone through. A dim sense of
- having taken part in some strange tragedy came to him once or twice, but
- there was the unreality of a dream about it.
- As soon as he was dressed, he went into the library and sat down to a
- light French breakfast, that had been laid out for him on a small round
- table close to the open window. It was an exquisite day. The warm air
- seemed laden with spices. A bee flew in, and buzzed round the
- blue-dragon bowl that, filled with sulphur-yellow roses, stood before
- him. He felt perfectly happy.
- Suddenly his eye fell on the screen that he had placed in front of the
- portrait, and he started.
- "Too cold for Monsieur?" asked his valet, putting an omelette on the
- table. "I shut the window?"
- Dorian shook his head. "I am not cold," he murmured.
- Was it all true? Had the portrait really changed? Or had it been simply
- his own imagination that had made him see a look of evil where there had
- been a look of joy? Surely a painted canvas could not alter? The thing
- was absurd. It would serve as a tale to tell Basil some day. It would
- make him smile.
- And, yet, how vivid was his recollection of the whole thing! First in
- the dim twilight, and then in the bright dawn, he had seen the touch of
- cruelty round the warped lips. He almost dreaded his valet leaving the
- room. He knew that when he was alone he would have to examine the
- portrait. He was afraid of certainty. When the coffee and cigarettes
- had been brought and the man turned to go, he felt a wild desire to tell
- him to remain. As the door was closing behind him he called him back.
- The man stood waiting for his orders. Dorian looked at him for a moment.
- "I am not at home to anyone, Victor," he said, with a sigh. The man
- bowed and retired.
- Then he rose from the table, lit a cigarette, and flung himself down on
- a luxuriously-cushioned couch that stood facing the screen. The screen
- was an old one, of gilt Spanish leather, stamped and wrought with a
- rather florid Louis-Quatorze pattern. He scanned it curiously, wondering
- if ever before it had concealed the secret of a man's life.
- Should he move it aside, after all? Why not let it stay there? What was
- the use of knowing? If the thing was true, it was terrible. If it was
- not true, why trouble about it? But what if, by some fate or deadlier
- chance, eyes other than his spied behind, and saw the horrible change?
- What should he do if Basil Hallward came and asked to look at his own
- picture? Basil would be sure to do that. No; the thing had to be
- examined, and at once. Anything would be better than this dreadful state
- of doubt.
- He got up, and locked both doors. At least he would be alone when he
- looked upon the mask of his shame. Then he drew the screen aside, and
- saw himself face to face. It was perfectly true. The portrait had
- altered.
- As he often remembered afterwards, and always with no small wonder, he
- found himself at first gazing at the portrait with a feeling of almost
- scientific interest. That such a change should have taken place was
- incredible to him. And yet it was a fact. Was there some subtle affinity
- between the chemical atoms, that shaped themselves into form and colour
- on the canvas, and the soul that was within him? Could it be that what
- that soul thought, they realized?--that what it dreamed, they made true?
- Or was there some other, more terrible reason? He shuddered, and felt
- afraid, and, going back to the couch, lay there, gazing at the picture
- in sickened horror.
- One thing, however, he felt that it had done for him. It had made him
- conscious how unjust, how cruel, he had been to Sibyl Vane. It was not
- too late to make reparation for that. She could still be his wife. His
- unreal and selfish love would yield to some higher influence, would be
- transformed into some nobler passion, and the portrait that Basil
- Hallward had painted of him would be a guide to him through life, would
- be to him what holiness is to some, and conscience to others, and the
- fear of God to us all. There were opiates for remorse, drugs that could
- lull the moral sense to sleep. But here was a visible symbol of the
- degradation of sin. Here was an ever-present sign of the ruin men
- brought upon their souls.
- Three o'clock struck, and four, and the half-hour rang its double chime,
- but Dorian Gray did not stir. He was trying to gather up the scarlet
- threads of life, and to weave them into a pattern; to find his way
- through the sanguine labyrinth of passion through which he was
- wandering. He did not know what to do, or what to think. Finally, he
- went over to the table, and wrote a passionate letter to the girl he had
- loved, imploring her forgiveness, and accusing himself of madness. He
- covered page after page with wild words of sorrow, and wilder words of
- pain. There is a luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves we
- feel that no one else has a right to blame us. It is the confession, not
- the priest, that gives us absolution. When Dorian had finished the
- letter, he felt that he had been forgiven.
- Suddenly there came a knock to the door, and he heard Lord Henry's voice
- outside. "My dear boy, I must see you. Let me in at once. I can't bear
- your shutting yourself up like this."
- He made no answer at first, but remained quite still. The knocking
- still continued, and grew louder. Yes, it was better to let Lord Henry
- in, and to explain to him the new life he was going to lead, to quarrel
- with him if it became necessary to quarrel, to part if parting was
- inevitable. He jumped up, drew the screen hastily across the picture,
- and unlocked the door.
- "I am so sorry for it all, Dorian," said Lord Henry, as he entered. "But
- you must not think too much about it."
- "Do you mean about Sibyl Vane?" asked the lad.
- "Yes, of course," answered Lord Henry, sinking into a chair, and slowly
- pulling off his yellow gloves. "It is dreadful, from one point of view,
- but it was not your fault. Tell me, did you go behind and see her, after
- the play was over?"
- "Yes."
- "I felt sure you had. Did you make a scene with her?"
- "I was brutal, Harry--perfectly brutal. But it is all right now. I am
- not sorry for anything that has happened. It has taught me to know
- myself better."
- "Ah, Dorian, I am so glad you take it in that way! I was afraid I would
- find you plunged in remorse, and tearing that nice curly hair of yours."
- "I have got through all that," said Dorian, shaking his head, and
- smiling. "I am perfectly happy now. I know what conscience is, to begin
- with. It is not what you told me it was. It is the divinest thing in us.
- Don't sneer at it, Harry, any more--at least not before me. I want to be
- good. I can't bear the idea of my soul being hideous."
- "A very charming artistic basis for ethics, Dorian! I congratulate you
- on it. But how are you going to begin?"
- "By marrying Sibyl Vane."
- "Marrying Sibyl Vane!" cried Lord Henry, standing up, and looking at him
- in perplexed amazement. "But, my dear Dorian----"
- "Yes, Harry, I know what you are going to say. Something dreadful about
- marriage. Don't say it. Don't ever say things of that kind to me again.
- Two days ago I asked Sibyl to marry me. I am not going to break my word
- to her. She is to be my wife!"
- "Your wife! Dorian!... Didn't you get my letter? I wrote to you this
- morning, and sent the note down, by my own man."
- "Your letter? Oh, yes, I remember. I have not read it yet, Harry. I was
- afraid there might be something in it that I wouldn't like. You cut life
- to pieces with your epigrams."
- "You know nothing then?"
- "What do you mean?"
- Lord Henry walked across the room, and, sitting down by Dorian Gray,
- took both his hands in his own, and held them tightly. "Dorian," he
- said, "my letter--don't be frightened--was to tell you that Sibyl Vane
- is dead."
- A cry of pain broke from the lad's lips, and he leaped to his feet,
- tearing his hands away from Lord Henry's grasp. "Dead! Sibyl dead! It is
- not true! It is a horrible lie! How dare you say it?"
- "It is quite true, Dorian," said Lord Henry, gravely. "It is in all the
- morning papers. I wrote down to you to ask you not to see anyone till I
- came. There will have to be an inquest, of course, and you must not be
- mixed up in it. Things like that make a man fashionable in Paris. But in
- London people are so prejudiced. Here, one should never make one's
- _début_ with a scandal. One should reserve that to give an interest to
- one's old age. I suppose they don't know your name at the theatre? If
- they don't, it is all right. Did anyone see you going round to her room?
- That is an important point."
- Dorian did not answer for a few moments. He was dazed with horror.
- Finally he stammered in a stifled voice, "Harry, did you say an
- inquest? What did you mean by that? Did Sibyl----? Oh, Harry, I can't
- bear it! But be quick. Tell me everything at once."
- "I have no doubt it was not an accident, Dorian, though it must be put
- in that way to the public. It seems that as she was leaving the theatre
- with her mother, about half-past twelve or so, she said she had
- forgotten something upstairs. They waited some time for her, but she did
- not come down again. They ultimately found her lying dead on the floor
- of her dressing-room. She had swallowed something by mistake, some
- dreadful thing they use at theatres. I don't know what it was, but it
- had either prussic acid or white lead in it. I should fancy it was
- prussic acid, as she seems to have died instantaneously."
- "Harry, Harry, it is terrible!" cried the lad.
- "Yes; it is very tragic, of course, but you must not get yourself mixed
- up in it. I see by _The Standard_ that she was seventeen. I should have
- thought she was almost younger than that. She looked such a child, and
- seemed to know so little about acting. Dorian, you mustn't let this
- thing get on your nerves. You must come and dine with me, and afterwards
- we will look in at the Opera. It is a Patti night, and everybody will be
- there. You can come to my sister's box. She has got some smart women
- with her."
- "So I have murdered Sibyl Vane," said Dorian Gray, half to
- himself--"murdered her as surely as if I had cut her little throat with
- a knife. Yet the roses are not less lovely for all that. The birds sing
- just as happily in my garden. And to-night I am to dine with you, and
- then go on to the Opera, and sup somewhere, I suppose, afterwards. How
- extraordinarily dramatic life is! If I had read all this in a book,
- Harry, I think I would have wept over it. Somehow, now that it has
- happened actually, and to me, it seems far too wonderful for tears. Here
- is the first passionate love-letter I have ever written in my life.
- Strange, that my first passionate love-letter should have been addressed
- to a dead girl. Can they feel, I wonder, those white silent people we
- call the dead? Sibyl! Can she feel, or know, or listen? Oh, Harry, how I
- loved her once! It seems years ago to me now. She was everything to me.
- Then came that dreadful night--was it really only last night?--when she
- played so badly, and my heart almost broke. She explained it all to me.
- It was terribly pathetic. But I was not moved a bit. I thought her
- shallow. Suddenly something happened that made me afraid. I can't tell
- you what it was, but it was terrible. I said I would go back to her. I
- felt I had done wrong. And now she is dead. My God! my God! Harry, what
- shall I do? You don't know the danger I am in, and there is nothing to
- keep me straight. She would have done that for me. She had no right to
- kill herself. It was selfish of her."
- "My dear Dorian," answered Lord Henry, taking a cigarette from his case,
- and producing a gold-latten matchbox, "the only way a woman can ever
- reform a man is by boring him so completely that he loses all possible
- interest in life. If you had married this girl you would have been
- wretched. Of course you would have treated her kindly. One can always be
- kind to people about whom one cares nothing. But she would have soon
- found out that you were absolutely indifferent to her. And when a woman
- finds that out about her husband, she either becomes dreadfully dowdy,
- or wears very smart bonnets that some other woman's husband has to pay
- for. I say nothing about the social mistake, which would have been
- abject, which, of course, I would not have allowed, but I assure you
- that in any case the whole thing would have been an absolute failure."
- "I suppose it would," muttered the lad, walking up and down the room,
- and looking horribly pale. "But I thought it was my duty. It is not my
- fault that this terrible tragedy has prevented my doing what was right.
- I remember your saying once that there is a fatality about good
- resolutions--that they are always made too late. Mine certainly were."
- "Good resolutions are useless attempts to interfere with scientific
- laws. Their origin is pure vanity. Their result is absolutely _nil_.
- They give us, now and then, some of those luxurious sterile emotions
- that have a certain charm for the weak. That is all that can be said for
- them. They are simply cheques that men draw on a bank where they have no
- account."
- "Harry," cried Dorian Gray, coming over and sitting down beside him,
- "why is it that I cannot feel this tragedy as much as I want to? I don't
- think I am heartless. Do you?"
- "You have done too many foolish things during the last fortnight to be
- entitled to give yourself that name, Dorian," answered Lord Henry, with
- his sweet, melancholy smile.
- The lad frowned. "I don't like that explanation, Harry," he rejoined,
- "but I am glad you don't think I am heartless. I am nothing of the kind.
- I know I am not. And yet I must admit that this thing that has happened
- does not affect me as it should. It seems to me to be simply like a
- wonderful ending to a wonderful play. It has all the terrible beauty of
- a Greek tragedy, a tragedy in which I took a great part, but by which I
- have not been wounded."
- "It is an interesting question," said Lord Henry, who found an exquisite
- pleasure in playing on the lad's unconscious egotism--"an extremely
- interesting question. I fancy that the true explanation is this. It
- often happens that the real tragedies of life occur in such an
- inartistic manner that they hurt us by their crude violence, their
- absolute incoherence, their absurd want of meaning, their entire lack of
- style. They affect us just as vulgarity affects us. They give us an
- impression of sheer brute force, and we revolt against that. Sometimes,
- however, a tragedy that possesses artistic elements of beauty crosses
- our lives. If these elements of beauty are real, the whole thing simply
- appeals to our sense of dramatic effect. Suddenly we find that we are no
- longer the actors, but the spectators of the play. Or rather we are
- both. We watch ourselves, and the mere wonder of the spectacle enthralls
- us. In the present case, what is it that has really happened? Someone
- has killed herself for love of you. I wish that I had ever had such an
- experience. It would have made me in love with love for the rest of my
- life. The people who have adored me--there have not been very many, but
- there have been some--have always insisted on living on, long after I
- had ceased to care for them, or they to care for me. They have become
- stout and tedious, and when I meet them they go in at once for
- reminiscences. That awful memory of woman! What a fearful thing it is!
- And what an utter intellectual stagnation it reveals! One should absorb
- the colour of life, but one should never remember its details. Details
- are always vulgar."
- "I must sow poppies in my garden," sighed Dorian.
- "There is no necessity," rejoined his companion. "Life has always
- poppies in her hands. Of course, now and then things linger. I once wore
- nothing but violets all through one season, as a form of artistic
- mourning for a romance that would not die. Ultimately, however, it did
- die. I forget what killed it. I think it was her proposing to sacrifice
- the whole world for me. That is always a dreadful moment. It fills one
- with the terror of eternity. Well--would you believe it?--a week ago, at
- Lady Hampshire's, I found myself seated at dinner next the lady in
- question, and she insisted on going over the whole thing again, and
- digging up the past, and raking up the future. I had buried my romance
- in a bed of asphodel. She dragged it out again, and assured me that I
- had spoiled her life. I am bound to state that she ate an enormous
- dinner, so I did not feel any anxiety. But what a lack of taste she
- showed! The one charm of the past is that it is the past. But women
- never know when the curtain has fallen. They always want a sixth act,
- and as soon as the interest of the play is entirely over they propose to
- continue it. If they were allowed their own way, every comedy would have
- a tragic ending, and every tragedy would culminate in a farce. They are
- charmingly artificial, but they have no sense of art. You are more
- fortunate than I am. I assure you, Dorian, that not one of the women I
- have known would have done for me what Sibyl Vane did for you. Ordinary
- women always console themselves. Some of them do it by going in for
- sentimental colours. Never trust a woman who wears mauve, whatever her
- age may be, or a woman over thirty-five who is fond of pink ribbons. It
- always means that they have a history. Others find a great consolation
- in suddenly discovering the good qualities of their husbands. They
- flaunt their conjugal felicity in one's face, as if it were the most
- fascinating of sins. Religion consoles some. Its mysteries have all the
- charm of a flirtation, a woman once told me; and I can quite understand
- it. Besides, nothing makes one so vain as being told that one is a
- sinner. Conscience makes egotists of us all. Yes; there is really no end
- to the consolations that women find in modern life. Indeed, I have not
- mentioned the most important one."
- "What is that, Harry?" said the lad, listlessly.
- "Oh, the obvious consolation. Taking someone else's admirer when one
- loses one's own. In good society that always whitewashes a woman. But
- really, Dorian, how different Sibyl Vane must have been from all the
- women one meets! There is something to me quite beautiful about her
- death. I am glad I am living in a century when such wonders happen. They
- make one believe in the reality of the things we all play with, such as
- romance, passion, and love."
- "I was terribly cruel to her. You forget that."
- "I am afraid that women appreciate cruelty, downright cruelty, more than
- anything else. They have wonderfully primitive instincts. We have
- emancipated them, but they remain slaves looking for their masters, all
- the same. They love being dominated. I am sure you were splendid. I have
- never seen you really and absolutely angry, but I can fancy how
- delightful you looked. And, after all, you said something to me the day
- before yesterday that seemed to me at the time to be merely fanciful,
- but that I see now was absolutely true, and it holds the key to
- everything."
- "What was that, Harry?"
- "You said to me that Sibyl Vane represented to you all the heroines of
- romance--that she was Desdemona one night, and Ophelia the other; that
- if she died as Juliet, she came to life as Imogen."
- "She will never come to life again now," muttered the lad, burying his
- face in his hands.
- "No, she will never come to life. She has played her last part. But you
- must think of that lonely death in the tawdry dressing-room simply as a
- strange lurid fragment from some Jacobean tragedy, as a wonderful scene
- from Webster, or Ford, or Cyril Tourneur. The girl never really lived,
- and so she has never really died. To you at least she was always a
- dream, a phantom that flitted through Shakespeare's plays and left them
- lovelier for its presence, a reed through which Shakespeare's music
- sounded richer and more full of joy. The moment she touched actual life,
- she marred it, and it marred her, and so she passed away. Mourn for
- Ophelia, if you like. Put ashes on your head because Cordelia was
- strangled. Cry out against Heaven because the daughter of Brabantio
- died. But don't waste your tears over Sibyl Vane. She was less real than
- they are."
- There was a silence. The evening darkened in the room. Noiselessly, and
- with silver feet, the shadows crept in from the garden. The colours
- faded wearily out of things.
- After some time Dorian Gray looked up. "You have explained me to myself,
- Harry," he murmured, with something of a sigh of relief. "I felt all
- that you have said, but somehow I was afraid of it, and I could not
- express it to myself. How well you know me! But we will not talk again
- of what has happened. It has been a marvellous experience. That is all.
- I wonder if life has still in store for me anything as marvellous."
- "Life has everything in store for you, Dorian. There is nothing that
- you, with your extraordinary good looks, will not be able to do."
- "But suppose, Harry, I became haggard, and old, and wrinkled? What
- then?"
- "Ah, then," said Lord Henry, rising to go--"then, my dear Dorian, you
- would have to fight for your victories. As it is, they are brought to
- you. No, you must keep your good looks. We live in an age that reads too
- much to be wise, and that thinks too much to be beautiful. We cannot
- spare you. And now you had better dress, and drive down to the club. We
- are rather late, as it is."
- "I think I shall join you at the Opera, Harry. I feel too tired to eat
- anything. What is the number of your sister's box?"
- "Twenty-seven, I believe. It is on the grand tier. You will see her name
- on the door. But I am sorry you won't come and dine."
- "I don't feel up to it," said Dorian, listlessly. "But I am awfully
- obliged to you for all that you have said to me. You are certainly my
- best friend. No one has ever understood me as you have."
- "We are only at the beginning of our friendship, Dorian," answered Lord
- Henry, shaking him by the hand. "Good-bye. I shall see you before
- nine-thirty, I hope. Remember, Patti is singing."
- As he closed the door behind him, Dorian Gray touched the bell, and in a
- few minutes Victor appeared with the lamps and drew the blinds down. He
- waited impatiently for him to go. The man seemed to take an interminable
- time over everything.
- As soon as he had left, he rushed to the screen, and drew it back. No;
- there was no further change in the picture. It had received the news of
- Sibyl Vane's death before he had known of it himself. It was conscious
- of the events of life as they occurred. The vicious cruelty that marred
- the fine lines of the mouth had, no doubt, appeared at the very moment
- that the girl had drunk the poison, whatever it was. Or was it
- indifferent to results? Did it merely take cognizance of what passed
- within the soul? He wondered, and hoped that some day he would see the
- change taking place before his very eyes, shuddering as he hoped it.
- Poor Sibyl! what a romance it had all been! She had often mimicked death
- on the stage. Then Death himself had touched her, and taken her with
- him. How had she played that dreadful last scene? Had she cursed him, as
- she died? No; she had died for love of him, and love would always be a
- sacrament to him now. She had atoned for everything, by the sacrifice
- she had made of her life. He would not think any more of what she had
- made him go through, on that horrible night at the theatre. When he
- thought of her, it would be as a wonderful tragic figure sent on to the
- world's stage to show the supreme reality of Love. A wonderful tragic
- figure? Tears came to his eyes as he remembered her childlike look, and
- winsome fanciful ways, and shy tremulous grace. He brushed them away
- hastily, and looked again at the picture.
- He felt that the time had really come for making his choice. Or had his
- choice already been made? Yes, life had decided that for him--life, and
- his own infinite curiosity about life. Eternal youth, infinite passion,
- pleasures subtle and secret, wild joys and wilder sins--he was to have
- all these things. The portrait was to bear the burden of his shame: that
- was all.
- A feeling of pain crept over him as he thought of the desecration that
- was in store for the fair face on the canvas. Once, in boyish mockery of
- Narcissus, he had kissed, or feigned to kiss, those painted lips that
- now smiled so cruelly at him. Morning after morning he had sat before
- the portrait, wondering at its beauty, almost enamoured of it, as it
- seemed to him at times. Was it to alter now with every mood to which he
- yielded? Was it to become a monstrous and loathsome thing, to be hidden
- away in a locked room, to be shut out from the sunlight that had so
- often touched to brighter gold the waving wonder of its hair? The pity
- of it! the pity of it!
- For a moment he thought of praying that the horrible sympathy that
- existed between him and the picture might cease. It had changed in
- answer to a prayer; perhaps in answer to a prayer it might remain
- unchanged. And, yet, who, that knew anything about Life, would surrender
- the chance of remaining always young, however fantastic that chance
- might be, or with what fateful consequences it might be fraught?
- Besides, was it really under his control? Had it indeed been prayer that
- had produced the substitution? Might there not be some curious
- scientific reason for it all? If thought could exercise its influence
- upon a living organism, might not thought exercise an influence upon
- dead and inorganic things? Nay, without thought or conscious desire,
- might not things external to ourselves vibrate in unison with our moods
- and passions, atom calling to atom in secret love of strange affinity?
- But the reason was of no importance. He would never again tempt by a
- prayer any terrible power. If the picture was to alter, it was to alter.
- That was all. Why inquire too closely into it?
- For there would be a real pleasure in watching it. He would be able to
- follow his mind into its secret places. This portrait would be to him
- the most magical of mirrors. As it had revealed to him his own body, so
- it would reveal to him his own soul. And when winter came upon it, he
- would still be standing where spring trembles on the verge of summer.
- When the blood crept from its face, and left behind a pallid mask of
- chalk with leaden eyes, he would keep the glamour of boyhood. Not one
- blossom of his loveliness would ever fade. Not one pulse of his life
- would ever weaken. Like the gods of the Greeks, he would be strong, and
- fleet, and joyous. What did it matter what happened to the coloured
- image on the canvas? He would be safe. That was everything.
- He drew the screen back into its former place in front of the picture,
- smiling as he did so, and passed into his bedroom, where his valet was
- already waiting for him. An hour later he was at the Opera, and Lord
- Henry was leaning over his chair.
- CHAPTER IX
- As he was sitting at breakfast next morning, Basil Hallward was shown
- into the room.
- "I am so glad I have found you, Dorian," he said, gravely. "I called
- last night, and they told me you were at the Opera. Of course I knew
- that was impossible. But I wish you had left word where you had really
- gone to. I passed a dreadful evening, half afraid that one tragedy might
- be followed by another. I think you might have telegraphed for me when
- you heard of it first. I read of it quite by chance in a late edition of
- _The Globe_, that I picked up at the club. I came here at once, and was
- miserable at not finding you. I can't tell you how heartbroken I am
- about the whole thing. I know what you must suffer. But where were you?
- Did you go down and see the girl's mother? For a moment I thought of
- following you there. They gave the address in the paper. Somewhere in
- the Euston Road, isn't it? But I was afraid of intruding upon a sorrow
- that I could not lighten. Poor woman! What a state she must be in! And
- her only child, too! What did she say about it all?"
- "My dear Basil, how do I know?" murmured Dorian Gray, sipping some
- pale-yellow wine from a delicate gold-beaded bubble of Venetian glass,
- and looking dreadfully bored. "I was at the Opera. You should have come
- on there. I met Lady Gwendolen, Harry's sister, for the first time. We
- were in her box. She is perfectly charming; and Patti sang divinely.
- Don't talk about horrid subjects. If one doesn't talk about a thing, it
- has never happened. It is simply expression, as Harry says, that gives
- reality to things. I may mention that she was not the woman's only
- child. There is a son, a charming fellow, I believe. But he is not on
- the stage. He is a sailor, or something. And now, tell me about yourself
- and what you are painting."
- "You went to the Opera?" said Hallward, speaking very slowly, and with a
- strained touch of pain in his voice. "You went to the Opera while Sibyl
- Vane was lying dead in some sordid lodging? You can talk to me of other
- women being charming, and of Patti singing divinely, before the girl you
- loved has even the quiet of a grave to sleep in? Why, man, there are
- horrors in store for that little white body of hers!"
- "Stop, Basil! I won't hear it!" cried Dorian, leaping to his feet. "You
- must not tell me about things. What is done is done. What is past is
- past."
- "You call yesterday the past?"
- "What has the actual lapse of time got to do with it? It is only shallow
- people who require years to get rid of an emotion. A man who is master
- of himself can end a sorrow as easily as he can invent a pleasure. I
- don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to
- enjoy them, and to dominate them."
- "Dorian, this is horrible! Something has changed you completely. You
- look exactly the same wonderful boy who, day after day, used to come
- down to my studio to sit for his picture. But you were simple, natural,
- and affectionate then. You were the most unspoiled creature in the whole
- world. Now, I don't know what has come over you. You talk as if you had
- no heart, no pity in you. It is all Harry's influence. I see that."
- The lad flushed up, and, going to the window, looked out for a few
- moments on the green, flickering, sun-lashed garden. "I owe a great deal
- to Harry, Basil," he said, at last--"more than I owe to you. You only
- taught me to be vain."
- "Well, I am punished for that, Dorian--or shall be some day."
- "I don't know what you mean, Basil," he exclaimed, turning round. "I
- don't know what you want. What do you want?"
- "I want the Dorian Gray I used to paint," said the artist, sadly.
- "Basil," said the lad, going over to him, and putting his hand on his
- shoulder, "you have come too late. Yesterday when I heard that Sibyl
- Vane had killed herself----"
- "Killed herself! Good heavens! is there no doubt about that?" cried
- Hallward, looking up at him with an expression of horror.
- "My dear Basil! Surely you don't think it was a vulgar accident? Of
- course she killed herself."
- The elder man buried his face in his hands. "How fearful," he muttered,
- and a shudder ran through him.
- "No," said Dorian Gray, "there is nothing fearful about it. It is one of
- the great romantic tragedies of the age. As a rule, people who act lead
- the most commonplace lives. They are good husbands, or faithful wives,
- or something tedious. You know what I mean--middle-class virtue, and all
- that kind of thing. How different Sibyl was! She lived her finest
- tragedy. She was always a heroine. The last night she played--the night
- you saw her--she acted badly because she had known the reality of love.
- When she knew its unreality, she died, as Juliet might have died. She
- passed again into the sphere of art. There is something of the martyr
- about her. Her death has all the pathetic uselessness of martyrdom, all
- its wasted beauty. But, as I was saying, you must not think I have not
- suffered. If you had come in yesterday at a particular moment--about
- half-past five, perhaps, or a quarter to six--you would have found me in
- tears. Even Harry, who was here, who brought me the news, in fact, had
- no idea what I was going through. I suffered immensely. Then it passed
- away. I cannot repeat an emotion. No one can, except sentimentalists.
- And you are awfully unjust, Basil. You come down here to console me.
- That is charming of you. You find me consoled, and you are furious. How
- like a sympathetic person! You remind me of a story Harry told me about
- a certain philanthropist who spent twenty years of his life in trying to
- get some grievance redressed, or some unjust law altered--I forget
- exactly what it was. Finally he succeeded, and nothing could exceed his
- disappointment. He had absolutely nothing to do, almost died of _ennui_,
- and became a confirmed misanthrope. And besides, my dear old Basil, if
- you really want to console me, teach me rather to forget what has
- happened, or to see it from the proper artistic point of view. Was it
- not Gautier who used to write about _la consolation des arts_? I
- remember picking up a little vellum-covered book in your studio one day
- and chancing on that delightful phrase. Well, I am not like that young
- man you told me of when we were down at Marlow together, the young man
- who used to say that yellow satin could console one for all the miseries
- of life. I love beautiful things that one can touch and handle. Old
- brocades, green bronzes, lacquer-work, carved ivories, exquisite
- surroundings, luxury, pomp, there is much to be got from all these. But
- the artistic temperament that they create, or at any rate reveal, is
- still more to me. To become the spectator of one's own life, as Harry
- says, is to escape the suffering of life. I know you are surprised at my
- talking to you like this. You have not realised how I have developed. I
- was a schoolboy when you knew me. I am a man now. I have new passions,
- new thoughts, new ideas. I am different, but you must not like me less.
- I am changed, but you must always be my friend. Of course I am very fond
- of Harry. But I know that you are better than he is. You are not
- stronger--you are too much afraid of life--but you are better. And how
- happy we used to be together! Don't leave me, Basil, and don't quarrel
- with me. I am what I am. There is nothing more to be said."
- The painter felt strangely moved. The lad was infinitely dear to him,
- and his personality had been the great turning-point in his art. He
- could not bear the idea of reproaching him any more. After all, his
- indifference was probably merely a mood that would pass away. There was
- so much in him that was good, so much in him that was noble.
- "Well, Dorian," he said, at length, with a sad smile, "I won't speak to
- you again about this horrible thing, after to-day. I only trust your
- name won't be mentioned in connection with it. The inquest is to take
- place this afternoon. Have they summoned you?"
- Dorian shook his head and a look of annoyance passed over his face at
- the mention of the word "inquest." There was something so crude and
- vulgar about everything of the kind. "They don't know my name," he
- answered.
- "But surely she did?"
- "Only my Christian name, and that I am quite sure she never mentioned to
- anyone. She told me once that they were all rather curious to learn who
- I was, and that she invariably told them my name was Prince Charming. It
- was pretty of her. You must do me a drawing of Sibyl, Basil. I should
- like to have something more of her than the memory of a few kisses and
- some broken pathetic words."
- "I will try and do something, Dorian, if it would please you. But you
- must come and sit to me yourself again. I can't get on without you."
- "I can never sit to you again, Basil. It is impossible!" he exclaimed,
- starting back.
- The painter stared at him. "My dear boy, what nonsense!" he cried. "Do
- you mean to say you don't like what I did of you? Where is it? Why have
- you pulled the screen in front of it? Let me look at it. It is the best
- thing I have ever done. Do take the screen away, Dorian. It is simply
- disgraceful of your servant hiding my work like that. I felt the room
- looked different as I came in."
- "My servant has nothing to do with it, Basil. You don't imagine I let
- him arrange my room for me? He settles my flowers for me sometimes--that
- is all. No; I did it myself. The light was too strong on the portrait."
- "Too strong! Surely not, my dear fellow? It is an admirable place for
- it. Let me see it." And Hallward walked towards the corner of the room.
- A cry of terror broke from Dorian Gray's lips, and he rushed between the
- painter and the screen. "Basil," he said, looking very pale, "you must
- not look at it. I don't wish you to."
- "Not look at my own work! you are not serious. Why shouldn't I look at
- it?" exclaimed Hallward, laughing.
- "If you try to look at it, Basil, on my word of honour I will never
- speak to you again as long as I live. I am quite serious. I don't offer
- any explanation, and you are not to ask for any. But, remember, if you
- touch this screen, everything is over between us."
- Hallward was thunderstruck. He looked at Dorian Gray in absolute
- amazement. He had never seen him like this before. The lad was actually
- pallid with rage. His hands were clenched, and the pupils of his eyes
- were like disks of blue fire. He was trembling all over.
- "Dorian!"
- "Don't speak!"
- "But what is the matter? Of course I won't look at it if you don't want
- me to," he said, rather coldly, turning on his heel, and going over
- towards the window. "But, really, it seems rather absurd that I
- shouldn't see my own work, especially as I am going to exhibit it in
- Paris in the autumn. I shall probably have to give it another coat of
- varnish before that, so I must see it some day, and why not to-day?"
- "To exhibit it? You want to exhibit it?" exclaimed Dorian Gray, a
- strange sense of terror creeping over him. Was the world going to be
- shown his secret? Were people to gape at the mystery of his life? That
- was impossible. Something--he did not know what--had to be done at once.
- "Yes; I don't suppose you will object to that. George Petit is going to
- collect all my best pictures for a special exhibition in the Rue de
- Sèze, which will open the first week in October. The portrait will only
- be away a month. I should think you could easily spare it for that time.
- In fact, you are sure to be out of town. And if you keep it always
- behind a screen, you can't care much about it."
- Dorian Gray passed his hand over his forehead. There were beads of
- perspiration there. He felt that he was on the brink of a horrible
- danger. "You told me a month ago that you would never exhibit it," he
- cried. "Why have you changed your mind? You people who go in for being
- consistent have just as many moods as others have. The only difference
- is that your moods are rather meaningless. You can't have forgotten that
- you assured me most solemnly that nothing in the world would induce you
- to send it to any exhibition. You told Harry exactly the same thing." He
- stopped suddenly, and a gleam of light came into his eyes. He remembered
- that Lord Henry had said to him once, half seriously and half in jest,
- "If you want to have a strange quarter of an hour, get Basil to tell you
- why he won't exhibit your picture. He told me why he wouldn't, and it
- was a revelation to me." Yes, perhaps Basil, too, had his secret. He
- would ask him and try.
- "Basil," he said, coming over quite close, and looking him straight in
- the face, "we have each of us a secret. Let me know yours and I shall
- tell you mine. What was your reason for refusing to exhibit my
- picture?"
- The painter shuddered in spite of himself. "Dorian, if I told you, you
- might like me less than you do, and you would certainly laugh at me. I
- could not bear your doing either of those two things. If you wish me
- never to look at your picture again, I am content. I have always you to
- look at. If you wish the best work I have ever done to be hidden from
- the world, I am satisfied. Your friendship is dearer to me than any fame
- or reputation."
- "No, Basil, you must tell me," insisted Dorian Gray. "I think I have a
- right to know." His feeling of terror had passed away, and curiosity had
- taken its place. He was determined to find out Basil Hallward's mystery.
- "Let us sit down, Dorian," said the painter, looking troubled. "Let us
- sit down. And just answer me one question. Have you noticed in the
- picture something curious?--something that probably at first did not
- strike you, but that revealed itself to you suddenly?"
- "Basil!" cried the lad, clutching the arms of his chair with trembling
- hands, and gazing at him with wild, startled eyes.
- "I see you did. Don't speak. Wait till you hear what I have to say.
- Dorian, from the moment I met you, your personality had the most
- extraordinary influence over me. I was dominated, soul, brain, and power
- by you. You became to me the visible incarnation of that unseen ideal
- whose memory haunts us artists like an exquisite dream. I worshipped
- you. I grew jealous of everyone to whom you spoke. I wanted to have you
- all to myself. I was only happy when I was with you. When you were away
- from me you were still present in my art.... Of course I never let you
- know anything about this. It would have been impossible. You would not
- have understood it. I hardly understood it myself. I only knew that I
- had seen perfection face to face, and that the world had become
- wonderful to my eyes--too wonderful, perhaps, for in such mad worships
- there is peril, the peril of losing them, no less than the peril of
- keeping them.... Weeks and weeks went on, and I grew more and more
- absorbed in you. Then came a new development. I had drawn you as Paris
- in dainty armour, and as Adonis with huntsman's cloak and polished
- boar-spear. Crowned with heavy lotus-blossoms you had sat on the prow of
- Adrian's barge, gazing across the green turbid Nile. You had leant over
- the still pool of some Greek woodland, and seen in the water's silent
- silver the marvel of your own face. And it had all been what art should
- be, unconscious, ideal, and remote. One day, a fatal day I sometimes
- think, I determined to paint a wonderful portrait of you as you actually
- are, not in the costume of dead ages, but in your own dress and in your
- own time. Whether it was the Realism of the method, or the mere wonder
- of your own personality, thus directly presented to me without mist or
- veil, I cannot tell. But I know that as I worked at it, every flake and
- film of colour seemed to me to reveal my secret. I grew afraid that
- others would know of my idolatry. I felt, Dorian, that I had told too
- much, that I had put too much of myself into it. Then it was that I
- resolved never to allow the picture to be exhibited. You were a little
- annoyed; but then you did not realise all that it meant to me. Harry, to
- whom I talked about it, laughed at me. But I did not mind that. When the
- picture was finished, and I sat alone with it, I felt that I was
- right.... Well, after a few days the thing left my studio, and as soon
- as I had got rid of the intolerable fascination of its presence it
- seemed to me that I had been foolish in imagining that I had seen
- anything in it, more than that you were extremely good-looking, and that
- I could paint. Even now I cannot help feeling that it is a mistake to
- think that the passion one feels in creation is ever really shown in the
- work one creates. Art is always more abstract than we fancy. Form and
- colour tell us of form and colour--that is all. It often seems to me
- that art conceals the artist far more completely than it ever reveals
- him. And so when I got this offer from Paris I determined to make your
- portrait the principal thing in my exhibition. It never occurred to me
- that you would refuse. I see now that you were right. The picture cannot
- be shown. You must not be angry with me, Dorian, for what I have told
- you. As I said to Harry, once, you are made to be worshipped."
- Dorian Gray drew a long breath. The colour came back to his cheeks, and
- a smile played about his lips. The peril was over. He was safe for the
- time. Yet he could not help feeling infinite pity for the painter who
- had just made this strange confession to him, and wondered if he himself
- would ever be so dominated by the personality of a friend. Lord Henry
- had the charm of being very dangerous. But that was all. He was too
- clever and too cynical to be really fond of. Would there ever be someone
- who would fill him with a strange idolatry? Was that one of the things
- that life had in store?
- "It is extraordinary to me, Dorian," said Hallward, "that you should
- have seen this in the portrait. Did you really see it?"
- "I saw something in it," he answered, "something that seemed to me very
- curious."
- "Well, you don't mind my looking at the thing now?"
- Dorian shook his head. "You must not ask me that, Basil. I could not
- possibly let you stand in front of that picture."
- "You will some day, surely?"
- "Never."
- "Well, perhaps you are right. And now good-bye, Dorian. You have been
- the one person in my life who has really influenced my art. Whatever I
- have done that is good, I owe to you. Ah! you don't know what it cost me
- to tell you all that I have told you."
- "My dear Basil," said Dorian, "what have you told me? Simply that you
- felt that you admired me too much. That is not even a compliment."
- "It was not intended as a compliment. It was a confession. Now that I
- have made it, something seems to have gone out of me. Perhaps one should
- never put one's worship into words."
- "It was a very disappointing confession."
- "Why, what did you expect, Dorian? You didn't see anything else in the
- picture, did you? There was nothing else to see?"
- "No; there was nothing else to see. Why do you ask? But you mustn't talk
- about worship. It is foolish. You and I are friends, Basil, and we must
- always remain so."
- "You have got Harry," said the painter, sadly.
- "Oh, Harry!" cried the lad, with a ripple of laughter. "Harry spends his
- days in saying what is incredible, and his evenings in doing what is
- improbable. Just the sort of life I would like to lead. But still I
- don't think I would go to Harry if I were in trouble. I would sooner go
- to you, Basil."
- "You will sit to me again?"
- "Impossible!"
- "You spoil my life as an artist by refusing, Dorian. No man came across
- two ideal things. Few come across one."
- "I can't explain it to you, Basil, but I must never sit to you again.
- There is something fatal about a portrait. It has a life of its own. I
- will come and have tea with you. That will be just as pleasant."
- "Pleasanter for you, I am afraid," murmured Hallward, regretfully. "And
- now good-bye. I am sorry you won't let me look at the picture once
- again. But that can't be helped. I quite understand what you feel about
- it."
- As he left the room, Dorian Gray smiled to himself. Poor Basil! how
- little he knew of the true reason! And how strange it was that, instead
- of having been forced to reveal his own secret, he had succeeded, almost
- by chance, in wresting a secret from his friend! How much that strange
- confession explained to him! The painter's absurd fits of jealousy, his
- wild devotion, his extravagant panegyrics, his curious reticences--he
- understood them all now, and he felt sorry. There seemed to him to be
- something tragic in a friendship so coloured by romance.
- He sighed, and touched the bell. The portrait must be hidden away at all
- costs. He could not run such a risk of discovery again. It had been mad
- of him to have allowed the thing to remain, even for an hour, in a room
- to which any of his friends had access.
- CHAPTER X
- When his servant entered, he looked at him steadfastly, and wondered if
- he had thought of peering behind the screen. The man was quite
- impassive, and waited for his orders. Dorian lit a cigarette, and walked
- over to the glass and glanced into it. He could see the reflection of
- Victor's face perfectly. It was like a placid mask of servility. There
- was nothing to be afraid of, there. Yet he thought it best to be on his
- guard.
- Speaking very slowly, he told him to tell the housekeeper that he wanted
- to see her, and then to go to the frame-maker and ask him to send two of
- his men round at once. It seemed to him that as the man left the room
- his eyes wandered in the direction of the screen. Or was that merely his
- own fancy?
- After a few moments, in her black silk dress, with old-fashioned thread
- mittens on her wrinkled hands, Mrs. Leaf bustled into the library. He
- asked her for the key of the schoolroom.
- "The old schoolroom, Mr. Dorian?" she exclaimed. "Why, it is full of
- dust. I must get it arranged, and put straight before you go into it. It
- is not fit for you to see, sir. It is not, indeed."
- "I don't want it put straight, Leaf. I only want the key."
- "Well, sir, you'll be covered with cobwebs if you go into it. Why, it
- hasn't been opened for nearly five years, not since his lordship died."
- He winced at the mention of his grandfather. He had hateful memories of
- him. "That does not matter," he answered. "I simply want to see the
- place--that is all. Give me the key."
- "And here is the key, sir," said the old lady, going over the contents
- of her bunch with tremulously uncertain hands. "Here is the key. I'll
- have it off the bunch in a moment. But you don't think of living up
- there, sir, and you so comfortable here?"
- "No, no," he cried, petulantly. "Thank you, Leaf. That will do."
- She lingered for a few moments, and was garrulous over some detail of
- the household. He sighed, and told her to manage things as she thought
- best. She left the room, wreathed in smiles.
- As the door closed, Dorian put the key in his pocket, and looked round
- the room. His eye fell on a large, purple satin coverlet heavily
- embroidered with gold, a splendid piece of late seventeenth-century
- Venetian work that his grandfather had found in a convent near Bologna.
- Yes, that would serve to wrap the dreadful thing in. It had perhaps
- served often as a pall for the dead. Now it was to hide something that
- had a corruption of its own, worse than the corruption of death
- itself--something that would breed horrors and yet would never die. What
- the worm was to the corpse, his sins would be to the painted image on
- the canvas. They would mar its beauty, and eat away its grace. They
- would defile it, and make it shameful. And yet the thing would still
- live on. It would be always alive.
- He shuddered, and for a moment he regretted that he had not told Basil
- the true reason why he had wished to hide the picture away. Basil would
- have helped him to resist Lord Henry's influence, and the still more
- poisonous influences that came from his own temperament. The love that
- he bore him--for it was really love--had nothing in it that was not
- noble and intellectual. It was not that mere physical admiration of
- beauty that is born of the senses, and that dies when the senses tire.
- It was such love as Michael Angelo had known, and Montaigne, and
- Winckelmann, and Shakespeare himself. Yes, Basil could have saved him.
- But it was too late now. The past could always be annihilated. Regret,
- denial, or forgetfulness could do that. But the future was inevitable.
- There were passions in him that would find their terrible outlet, dreams
- that would make the shadow of their evil real.
- He took up from the couch the great purple-and-gold texture that covered
- it, and, holding it in his hands, passed behind the screen. Was the face
- on the canvas viler than before? It seemed to him that it was unchanged;
- and yet his loathing of it was intensified. Gold hair, blue eyes, and
- rose-red lips--they all were there. It was simply the expression that
- had altered. That was horrible in its cruelty. Compared to what he saw
- in it of censure or rebuke, how shallow Basil's reproaches about Sibyl
- Vane had been!--how shallow, and of what little account! His own soul
- was looking out at him from the canvas and calling him to judgment. A
- look of pain came across him, and he flung the rich pall over the
- picture. As he did so, a knock came to the door. He passed out as his
- servant entered.
- "The persons are here, Monsieur."
- He felt that the man must be got rid of at once. He must not be allowed
- to know where the picture was being taken to. There was something sly
- about him, and he had thoughtful, treacherous eyes. Sitting down at the
- writing-table, he scribbled a note to Lord Henry, asking him to send him
- round something to read, and reminding him that they were to meet at
- eight-fifteen that evening.
- "Wait for an answer," he said, handing it to him, "and show the men in
- here."
- In two or three minutes there was another knock, and Mr. Hubbard
- himself, the celebrated frame-maker of South Audley Street, came in with
- a somewhat rough-looking young assistant. Mr. Hubbard was a florid,
- red-whiskered little man, whose admiration for art was considerably
- tempered by the inveterate impecuniosity of most of the artists who
- dealt with him. As a rule, he never left his shop. He waited for people
- to come to him. But he always made an exception in favour of Dorian
- Gray. There was something about Dorian that charmed everybody. It was a
- pleasure even to see him.
- "What can I do for you, Mr. Gray?" he said, rubbing his fat freckled
- hands. "I thought I would do myself the honour of coming round in
- person. I have just got a beauty of a frame, sir. Picked it up at a
- sale. Old Florentine. Came from Fonthill, I believe. Admirably suited
- for a religious subject, Mr. Gray."
- "I am so sorry you have given yourself the trouble of coming round, Mr.
- Hubbard. I shall certainly drop in and look at the frame--though I don't
- go in much at present for religious art--but to-day I only want a
- picture carried to the top of the house for me. It is rather heavy, so I
- thought I would ask you to lend me a couple of your men."
- "No trouble at all, Mr. Gray. I am delighted to be of any service to
- you. Which is the work of art, sir?"
- "This," replied Dorian, moving the screen back. "Can you move it,
- covering and all, just as it is? I don't want it to get scratched going
- upstairs."
- "There will be no difficulty, sir," said the genial frame-maker,
- beginning, with the aid of his assistant, to unhook the picture from the
- long brass chains by which it was suspended. "And, now, where shall we
- carry it to, Mr. Gray?"
- "I will show you the way, Mr. Hubbard, if you will kindly follow me. Or
- perhaps you had better go in front. I am afraid it is right at the top
- of the house. We will go up by the front staircase, as it is wider."
- He held the door open for them, and they passed out into the hall and
- began the ascent. The elaborate character of the frame had made the
- picture extremely bulky, and now and then, in spite of the obsequious
- protests of Mr. Hubbard, who had the true tradesman's spirited dislike
- of seeing a gentleman doing anything useful, Dorian put his hand to it
- so as to help them.
- "Something of a load to carry, sir," gasped the little man, when they
- reached the top landing. And he wiped his shiny forehead.
- "I am afraid it is rather heavy," murmured Dorian, as he unlocked the
- door that opened into the room that was to keep for him the curious
- secret of his life and hide his soul from the eyes of men.
- He had not entered the place for more than four years--not, indeed,
- since he had used it first as a play-room when he was a child, and then
- as a study when he grew somewhat older. It was a large,
- well-proportioned room, which had been specially built by the last Lord
- Kelso for the use of the little grandson whom, for his strange likeness
- to his mother, and also for other reasons, he had always hated and
- desired to keep at a distance. It appeared to Dorian to have but little
- changed. There was the huge Italian _cassone_, with its
- fantastically-painted panels and its tarnished gilt mouldings, in which
- he had so often hidden himself as a boy. There the satinwood bookcase
- filled with his dog-eared schoolbooks. On the wall behind it was hanging
- the same ragged Flemish tapestry, where a faded king and queen were
- playing chess in a garden, while a company of hawkers rode by, carrying
- hooded birds on their gauntleted wrists. How well he remembered it all!
- Every moment of his lonely childhood came back to him as he looked
- round. He recalled the stainless purity of his boyish life, and it
- seemed horrible to him that it was here the fatal portrait was to be
- hidden away. How little he had thought, in those dead days, of all that
- was in store for him!
- But there was no other place in the house so secure from prying eyes as
- this. He had the key, and no one else could enter it. Beneath its purple
- pall, the face painted on the canvas could grow bestial, sodden, and
- unclean. What did it matter? No one could see it. He himself would not
- see it. Why should he watch the hideous corruption of his soul? He kept
- his youth--that was enough. And, besides, might not his nature grow
- finer, after all? There was no reason that the future should be so full
- of shame. Some love might come across his life, and purify him, and
- shield him from those sins that seemed to be already stirring in spirit
- and in flesh--those curious unpictured sins whose very mystery lent them
- their subtlety and their charm. Perhaps, some day, the cruel look would
- have passed away from the scarlet sensitive mouth, and he might show to
- the world Basil Hallward's masterpiece.
- No; that was impossible. Hour by hour, and week by week, the thing upon
- the canvas was growing old. It might escape the hideousness of sin, but
- the hideousness of age was in store for it. The cheeks would become
- hollow or flaccid. Yellow crow's-feet would creep round the fading eyes
- and make them horrible. The hair would lose its brightness, the mouth
- would gape or droop, would be foolish or gross, as the mouths of old men
- are. There would be the wrinkled throat, the cold, blue-veined hands,
- the twisted body, that he remembered in the grandfather who had been so
- stern to him in his boyhood. The picture had to be concealed. There was
- no help for it.
- "Bring it in, Mr. Hubbard, please," he said, wearily, turning round. "I
- am sorry I kept you so long. I was thinking of something else."
- "Always glad to have a rest, Mr. Gray," answered the frame-maker, who
- was still gasping for breath. "Where shall we put it, sir?"
- "Oh, anywhere. Here: this will do. I don't want to have it hung up. Just
- lean it against the wall. Thanks."
- "Might one look at the work of art, sir?"
- Dorian started. "It would not interest you, Mr. Hubbard," he said,
- keeping his eye on the man. He felt ready to leap upon him and fling him
- to the ground if he dared to lift the gorgeous hanging that concealed
- the secret of his life. "I shan't trouble you any more now. I am much
- obliged for your kindness in coming round."
- "Not at all, not at all, Mr. Gray. Ever ready to do anything for you,
- sir." And Mr. Hubbard tramped downstairs, followed by the assistant, who
- glanced back at Dorian with a look of shy wonder in his rough, uncomely
- face. He had never seen anyone so marvellous.
- When the sound of their footsteps had died away, Dorian locked the door,
- and put the key in his pocket. He felt safe now. No one would ever look
- upon the horrible thing. No eye but his would ever see his shame.
- On reaching the library he found that it was just after five o'clock,
- and that the tea had been already brought up. On a little table of dark
- perfumed wood thickly encrusted with nacre, a present from Lady Radley,
- his guardian's wife, a pretty professional invalid, who had spent the
- preceding winter in Cairo, was lying a note from Lord Henry, and beside
- it was a book bound in yellow paper, the cover slightly torn and the
- edges soiled. A copy of the third edition of _The St. James's Gazette_
- had been placed on the tea-tray. It was evident that Victor had
- returned. He wondered if he had met the men in the hall as they were
- leaving the house, and had wormed out of them what they had been doing.
- He would be sure to miss the picture--had no doubt missed it already,
- while he had been laying the tea-things. The screen had not been set
- back, and a blank space was visible on the wall. Perhaps some night he
- might find him creeping upstairs and trying to force the door of the
- room. It was a horrible thing to have a spy in one's house. He had heard
- of rich men who had been blackmailed all their lives by some servant who
- had read a letter, or overheard a conversation, or picked up a card with
- an address, or found beneath a pillow a withered flower or a shred of
- crumpled lace.
- He sighed, and, having poured himself out some tea, opened Lord Henry's
- note. It was simply to say that he sent him round the evening paper, and
- a book that might interest him, and that he would be at the club at
- eight-fifteen. He opened _The St. James's_ languidly, and looked through
- it. A red pencil-mark on the fifth page caught his eye. It drew
- attention to the following paragraph:--
- "INQUEST ON AN ACTRESS.--An inquest was held this morning at the
- Bell Tavern, Hoxton Road, by Mr. Danby, the District Coroner, on
- the body of Sibyl Vane, a young actress recently engaged at the
- Royal Theatre, Holborn. A verdict of death by misadventure was
- returned. Considerable sympathy was expressed for the mother of the
- deceased, who was greatly affected during the giving of her own
- evidence, and that of Dr. Birrell, who had made the post-mortem
- examination of the deceased."
- He frowned, and, tearing the paper in two, went across the room and
- flung the pieces away. How ugly it all was! And how horribly real
- ugliness made things! He felt a little annoyed with Lord Henry for
- having sent him the report. And it was certainly stupid of him to have
- marked it with red pencil. Victor might have read it. The man knew more
- than enough English for that.
- Perhaps he had read it, and had begun to suspect something. And, yet,
- what did it matter? What had Dorian Gray to do with Sibyl Vane's death?
- There was nothing to fear. Dorian Gray had not killed her.
- His eye fell on the yellow book that Lord Henry had sent him. What was
- it, he wondered. He went towards the little pearl-coloured octagonal
- stand, that had always looked to him like the work of some strange
- Egyptian bees that wrought in silver, and taking up the volume, flung
- himself into an arm-chair, and began to turn over the leaves. After a
- few minutes he became absorbed. It was the strangest book that he had
- ever read. It seemed to him that in exquisite raiment, and to the
- delicate sound of flutes, the sins of the world were passing in dumb
- show before him. Things that he had dimly dreamed of were suddenly made
- real to him. Things of which he had never dreamed were gradually
- revealed.
- It was a novel without a plot, and with only one character, being,
- indeed, simply a psychological study of a certain young Parisian, who
- spent his life trying to realise in the nineteenth century all the
- passions and modes of thought that belonged to every century except his
- own, and to sum up, as it were, in himself the various moods through
- which the world-spirit had ever passed, loving for their mere
- artificiality those renunciations that men have unwisely called virtue,
- as much as those natural rebellions that wise men still call sin. The
- style in which it was written was that curious jewelled style, vivid and
- obscure at once, full of _argot_ and of archaisms, of technical
- expressions and of elaborate paraphrases, that characterises the work of
- some of the finest artists of the French school of _Symbolistes_. There
- were in it metaphors as monstrous as orchids, and as subtle in colour.
- The life of the senses was described in the terms of mystical
- philosophy. One hardly knew at times whether one was reading the
- spiritual ecstasies of some mediæval saint or the morbid confessions of
- a modern sinner. It was a poisonous book. The heavy odour of incense
- seemed to cling about its pages and to trouble the brain. The mere
- cadence of the sentences, the subtle monotony of their music, so full as
- it was of complex refrains and movements elaborately repeated, produced
- in the mind of the lad, as he passed from chapter to chapter, a form of
- reverie, a malady of dreaming, that made him unconscious of the falling
- day and creeping shadows.
- Cloudless, and pierced by one solitary star, a copper-green sky gleamed
- through the windows. He read on by its wan light till he could read no
- more. Then, after his valet had reminded him several times of the
- lateness of the hour, he got up, and, going into the next room, placed
- the book on the little Florentine table that always stood at his
- bedside, and began to dress for dinner.
- It was almost nine o'clock before he reached the club, where he found
- Lord Henry sitting alone, in the morning-room, looking very much bored.
- "I am so sorry, Harry," he cried, "but really it is entirely your fault.
- That book you sent me so fascinated me that I forgot how the time was
- going."
- "Yes: I thought you would like it," replied his host, rising from his
- chair.
- "I didn't say I liked it, Harry. I said it fascinated me. There is a
- great difference."
- "Ah, you have discovered that?" murmured Lord Henry. And they passed
- into the dining-room.
- CHAPTER XI
- For years, Dorian Gray could not free himself from the influence of this
- book. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that he never sought
- to free himself from it. He procured from Paris no less than nine
- large-paper copies of the first edition, and had them bound in different
- colours, so that they might suit his various moods and the changing
- fancies of a nature over which he seemed, at times, to have almost
- entirely lost control. The hero, the wonderful young Parisian, in whom
- the romantic and the scientific temperaments were so strangely blended,
- became to him a kind of prefiguring type of himself. And, indeed, the
- whole book seemed to him to contain the story of his own life, written
- before he had lived it.
- In one point he was more fortunate than the novel's fantastic hero. He
- never knew--never, indeed, had any cause to know--that somewhat
- grotesque dread of mirrors, and polished metal surfaces, and still
- water, which came upon the young Parisian so early in his life, and was
- occasioned by the sudden decay of a beauty that had once, apparently,
- been so remarkable. It was with an almost cruel joy--and perhaps in
- nearly every joy, as certainly in every pleasure, cruelty has its
- place--that he used to read the latter part of the book, with its really
- tragic, if somewhat over-emphasised, account of the sorrow and despair
- of one who had himself lost what in others, and in the world, he had
- most dearly valued.
- For the wonderful beauty that had so fascinated Basil Hallward, and many
- others besides him, seemed never to leave him. Even those who had heard
- the most evil things against him, and from time to time strange rumours
- about his mode of life crept through London and became the chatter of
- the clubs, could not believe anything to his dishonour when they saw
- him. He had always the look of one who had kept himself unspotted from
- the world. Men who talked grossly became silent when Dorian Gray entered
- the room. There was something in the purity of his face that rebuked
- them. His mere presence seemed to recall to them the memory of the
- innocence that they had tarnished. They wondered how one so charming and
- graceful as he was could have escaped the stain of an age that was at
- once sordid and sensual.
- Often, on returning home from one of those mysterious and prolonged
- absences that gave rise to such strange conjecture among those who were
- his friends, or thought that they were so, he himself would creep
- upstairs to the locked room, open the door with the key that never left
- him now, and stand, with a mirror, in front of the portrait that Basil
- Hallward had painted of him, looking now at the evil and ageing face on
- the canvas, and now at the fair young face that laughed back at him from
- the polished glass. The very sharpness of the contrast used to quicken
- his sense of pleasure. He grew more and more enamoured of his own
- beauty, more and more interested in the corruption of his own soul. He
- would examine with minute care, and sometimes with a monstrous and
- terrible delight, the hideous lines that seared the wrinkling forehead,
- or crawled around the heavy sensual mouth, wondering sometimes which
- were the more horrible, the signs of sin or the signs of age. He would
- place his white hands beside the coarse bloated hands of the picture,
- and smile. He mocked the misshapen body and the failing limbs.
- There were moments, indeed, at night, when, lying sleepless in his own
- delicately-scented chamber, or in the sordid room of the little
- ill-famed tavern near the Docks, which, under an assumed name, and in
- disguise, it was his habit to frequent, he would think of the ruin he
- had brought upon his soul, with a pity that was all the more poignant
- because it was purely selfish. But moments such as these were rare. That
- curiosity about life which Lord Henry had first stirred in him, as they
- sat together in the garden of their friend, seemed to increase with
- gratification. The more he knew, the more he desired to know. He had mad
- hungers that grew more ravenous as he fed them.
- Yet he was not really reckless, at any rate in his relations to society.
- Once or twice every month during the winter, and on each Wednesday
- evening while the season lasted, he would throw open to the world his
- beautiful house and have the most celebrated musicians of the day to
- charm his guests with the wonders of their art. His little dinners, in
- the settling of which Lord Henry always assisted him, were noted as much
- for the careful selection and placing of those invited, as for the
- exquisite taste shown in the decoration of the table, with its subtle
- symphonic arrangements of exotic flowers, and embroidered cloths, and
- antique plate of gold and silver. Indeed, there were many, especially
- among the very young men, who saw, or fancied that they saw, in Dorian
- Gray the true realisation of a type of which they had often dreamed in
- Eton or Oxford days, a type that was to combine something of the real
- culture of the scholar with all the grace and distinction and perfect
- manner of a citizen of the world. To them he seemed to be of the company
- of those whom Dante describes as having sought to "make themselves
- perfect by the worship of beauty." Like Gautier, he was one for whom
- "the visible world existed."
- And, certainly, to him Life itself was the first, the greatest, of the
- arts, and for it all the other arts seemed to be but a preparation.
- Fashion, by which what is really fantastic becomes for a moment
- universal, and Dandyism, which, in its own way, is an attempt to assert
- the absolute modernity of beauty, had, of course, their fascination for
- him. His mode of dressing, and the particular styles that from time to
- time he affected, had their marked influence on the young exquisites of
- the Mayfair balls and Pall Mall club windows, who copied him in
- everything that he did, and tried to reproduce the accidental charm of
- his graceful, though to him only half-serious, fopperies.
- For, while he was but too ready to accept the position that was almost
- immediately offered to him on his coming of age, and found, indeed, a
- subtle pleasure in the thought that he might really become to the London
- of his own day what to imperial Neronian Rome the author of the
- "Satyricon" once had been, yet in his inmost heart he desired to be
- something more than a mere _arbiter elegantiarum_, to be consulted on
- the wearing of a jewel, or the knotting of a necktie, or the conduct of
- a cane. He sought to elaborate some new scheme of life that would have
- its reasoned philosophy and its ordered principles, and find in the
- spiritualising of the senses its highest realisation.
- The worship of the senses has often, and with much justice, been
- decried, men feeling a natural instinct of terror about passions and
- sensations that seem stronger than themselves, and that they are
- conscious of sharing with the less highly organised forms of existence.
- But it appeared to Dorian Gray that the true nature of the senses had
- never been understood, and that they had remained savage and animal
- merely because the world had sought to starve them into submission or to
- kill them by pain, instead of aiming at making them elements of a new
- spirituality, of which a fine instinct for beauty was to be the dominant
- characteristic. As he looked back upon man moving through History, he
- was haunted by a feeling of loss. So much had been surrendered! and to
- such little purpose! There had been mad wilful rejections, monstrous
- forms of self-torture and self-denial, whose origin was fear, and whose
- result was a degradation infinitely more terrible than that fancied
- degradation from which, in their ignorance, they had sought to escape,
- Nature, in her wonderful irony, driving out the anchorite to feed with
- the wild animals of the desert and giving to the hermit the beasts of
- the field as his companions.
- Yes: there was to be, as Lord Henry had prophesied, a new Hedonism that
- was to recreate life, and to save it from that harsh, uncomely
- puritanism that is having, in our own day, its curious revival. It was
- to have its service of the intellect, certainly; yet, it was never to
- accept any theory or system that would involve the sacrifice of any mode
- of passionate experience. Its aim, indeed, was to be experience itself,
- and not the fruits of experience, sweet or bitter as they might be. Of
- the asceticism that deadens the senses, as of the vulgar profligacy that
- dulls them, it was to know nothing. But it was to teach man to
- concentrate himself upon the moments of a life that is itself but a
- moment.
- There are few of us who have not sometimes wakened before dawn, either
- after one of those dreamless nights that make us almost enamoured of
- death, or one of those nights of horror and misshapen joy, when through
- the chambers of the brain sweep phantoms more terrible than reality
- itself, and instinct with that vivid life that lurks in all grotesques,
- and that lends to Gothic art its enduring vitality, this art being, one
- might fancy, especially the art of those whose minds have been troubled
- with the malady of reverie. Gradually white fingers creep through the
- curtains, and they appear to tremble. In black fantastic shapes, dumb
- shadows crawl into the corners of the room, and crouch there. Outside,
- there is the stirring of birds among the leaves, or the sound of men
- going forth to their work, or the sigh and sob of the wind coming down
- from the hills, and wandering round the silent house, as though it
- feared to wake the sleepers, and yet must needs call forth sleep from
- her purple cave. Veil after veil of thin dusky gauze is lifted, and by
- degrees the forms and colours of things are restored to them, and we
- watch the dawn remaking the world in its antique pattern. The wan
- mirrors get back their mimic life. The flameless tapers stand where we
- had left them, and beside them lies the half-cut book that we had been
- studying, or the wired flower that we had worn at the ball, or the
- letter that we had been afraid to read, or that we had read too often.
- Nothing seems to us changed. Out of the unreal shadows of the night
- comes back the real life that we had known. We have to resume it where
- we had left off, and there steals over us a terrible sense of the
- necessity for the continuance of energy in the same wearisome round of
- stereotyped habits, or a wild longing, it may be, that our eyelids might
- open some morning upon a world that had been refashioned anew in the
- darkness for our pleasure, a world in which things would have fresh
- shapes and colours, and be changed, or have other secrets, a world in
- which the past would have little or no place, or survive, at any rate,
- in no conscious form of obligation or regret, the remembrance even of
- joy having its bitterness, and the memories of pleasure their pain.
- It was the creation of such worlds as these that seemed to Dorian Gray
- to be the true object, or amongst the true objects, of life; and in his
- search for sensations that would be at once new and delightful, and
- possess that element of strangeness that is so essential to romance, he
- would often adopt certain modes of thought that he knew to be really
- alien to his nature, abandon himself to their subtle influences, and
- then, having, as it were, caught their colour and satisfied his
- intellectual curiosity, leave them with that curious indifference that
- is not incompatible with a real ardour of temperament, and that indeed,
- according to certain modern psychologists, is often a condition of it.
- It was rumoured of him once that he was about to join the Roman Catholic
- communion; and certainly the Roman ritual had always a great attraction
- for him. The daily sacrifice, more awful really than all the sacrifices
- of the antique world, stirred him as much by its superb rejection of
- the evidence of the senses as by the primitive simplicity of its
- elements and the eternal pathos of the human tragedy that it sought to
- symbolise. He loved to kneel down on the cold marble pavement, and watch
- the priest, in his stiff flowered vestment, slowly and with white hands
- moving aside the veil of the tabernacle, or raising aloft the jewelled
- lantern-shaped monstrance with that pallid wafer that at times, one
- would fain think, is indeed the "_panis cælestis_," the bread of angels,
- or, robed in the garments of the Passion of Christ, breaking the Host
- into the chalice, and smiting his breast for his sins. The fuming
- censers, that the grave boys, in their lace and scarlet, tossed into the
- air like great gilt flowers, had their subtle fascination for him. As he
- passed out, he used to look with wonder at the black confessionals, and
- long to sit in the dim shadow of one of them and listen to men and women
- whispering through the worn grating the true story of their lives.
- But he never fell into the error of arresting his intellectual
- development by any formal acceptance of creed or system, or of
- mistaking, for a house in which to live, an inn that is but suitable for
- the sojourn of a night, or for a few hours of a night in which there are
- no stars and the moon is in travail. Mysticism, with its marvellous
- power of making common things strange to us, and the subtle
- antinomianism that always seems to accompany it, moved him for a season;
- and for a season he inclined to the materialistic doctrines of the
- _Darwinismus_ movement in Germany, and found a curious pleasure in
- tracing the thoughts and passions of men to some pearly cell in the
- brain, or some white nerve in the body, delighting in the conception of
- the absolute dependence of the spirit on certain physical conditions,
- morbid or healthy, normal or diseased. Yet, as has been said of him
- before, no theory of life seemed to him to be of any importance compared
- with life itself. He felt keenly conscious of how barren all
- intellectual speculation is when separated from action and experiment.
- He knew that the senses, no less than the soul, have their spiritual
- mysteries to reveal.
- And so he would now study perfumes, and the secrets of their
- manufacture, distilling heavily-scented oils, and burning odorous gums
- from the East. He saw that there was no mood of the mind that had not
- its counterpart in the sensuous life, and set himself to discover their
- true relations, wondering what there was in frankincense that made one
- mystical, and in ambergris that stirred one's passions, and in violets
- that woke the memory of dead romances, and in musk that troubled the
- brain, and in champak that stained the imagination; and seeking often to
- elaborate a real psychology of perfumes, and to estimate the several
- influences of sweet-smelling roots, and scented pollen-laden flowers, or
- aromatic balms, and of dark and fragrant woods, of spikenard that
- sickens, of hovenia that makes men mad, and of aloes that are said to be
- able to expel melancholy from the soul.
- At another time he devoted himself entirely to music, and in a long
- latticed room, with a vermilion-and-gold ceiling and walls of
- olive-green lacquer, he used to give curious concerts, in which mad
- gypsies tore wild music from little zithers, or grave yellow-shawled
- Tunisians plucked at the strained strings of monstrous lutes, while
- grinning negroes beat monotonously upon copper drums, and, crouching
- upon scarlet mats, slim turbaned Indians blew through long pipes of reed
- or brass, and charmed, or feigned to charm, great hooded snakes and
- horrible horned adders. The harsh intervals and shrill discords of
- barbaric music stirred him at times when Schubert's grace, and Chopin's
- beautiful sorrows, and the mighty harmonies of Beethoven himself, fell
- unheeded on his ear. He collected together from all parts of the world
- the strangest instruments that could be found, either in the tombs of
- dead nations or among the few savage tribes that have survived contact
- with Western civilisations, and loved to touch and try them. He had the
- mysterious _juruparis_ of the Rio Negro Indians, that women are not
- allowed to look at, and that even youths may not see till they have been
- subjected to fasting and scourging, and the earthen jars of the
- Peruvians that have the shrill cries of birds, and flutes of human bones
- such as Alfonso de Ovalle heard in Chili, and the sonorous green jaspers
- that are found near Cuzco and give forth a note of singular sweetness.
- He had painted gourds filled with pebbles that rattled when they were
- shaken; the long _clarin_ of the Mexicans, into which the performer does
- not blow, but through which he inhales the air; the harsh _ture_ of the
- Amazon tribes, that is sounded by the sentinels who sit all day long in
- high trees, and can be heard, it is said, at a distance of three
- leagues; the _teponaztli_, that has two vibrating tongues of wood, and
- is beaten with sticks that are smeared with an elastic gum obtained from
- the milky juice of plants; the _yotl_-bells of the Aztecs, that are hung
- in clusters like grapes; and a huge cylindrical drum, covered with the
- skins of great serpents, like the one that Bernal Diaz saw when he went
- with Cortes into the Mexican temple, and of whose doleful sound he has
- left us so vivid a description. The fantastic character of these
- instruments fascinated him, and he felt a curious delight in the thought
- that Art, like Nature, has her monsters, things of bestial shape and
- with hideous voices. Yet, after some time, he wearied of them, and would
- sit in his box at the Opera, either alone or with Lord Henry, listening
- in rapt pleasure to "Tannhäuser," and seeing in the prelude to that
- great work of art a presentation of the tragedy of his own soul.
- On one occasion he took up the study of jewels, and appeared at a
- costume ball as Anne de Joyeuse, Admiral of France, in a dress covered
- with five hundred and sixty pearls. This taste enthralled him for years,
- and, indeed, may be said never to have left him. He would often spend a
- whole day settling and resettling in their cases the various stones that
- he had collected, such as the olive-green chrysoberyl that turns red by
- lamp-light, the cymophane with its wire-like line of silver, the
- pistachio-coloured peridot, rose-pink and wine-yellow topazes,
- carbuncles of fiery scarlet with tremulous four-rayed stars, flame-red
- cinnamon-stones, orange and violet spinels, and amethysts with their
- alternate layers of ruby and sapphire. He loved the red gold of the
- sunstone, and the moonstone's pearly whiteness, and the broken rainbow
- of the milky opal. He procured from Amsterdam three emeralds of
- extraordinary size and richness of colour, and had a turquoise _de la
- vieille roche_ that was the envy of all the connoisseurs.
- He discovered wonderful stories, also, about jewels. In Alphonso's
- "Clericalis Disciplina" a serpent was mentioned with eyes of real
- jacinth, and in the romantic history of Alexander, the Conqueror of
- Emathia was said to have found in the vale of Jordan snakes "with
- collars of real emeralds growing on their backs." There was a gem in the
- brain of the dragon, Philostratus told us, and "by the exhibition of
- golden letters and a scarlet robe" the monster could be thrown into a
- magical sleep, and slain. According to the great alchemist, Pierre de
- Boniface, the diamond rendered a man invisible, and the agate of India
- made him eloquent. The cornelian appeased anger, and the hyacinth
- provoked sleep, and the amethyst drove away the fumes of wine. The
- garnet cast out demons, and the hydropicus deprived the moon of her
- colour. The selenite waxed and waned with the moon, and the meloceus,
- that discovers thieves, could be affected only by the blood of kids.
- Leonardus Camillus had seen a white stone taken from the brain of a
- newly-killed toad, that was a certain antidote against poison. The
- bezoar, that was found in the heart of the Arabian deer, was a charm
- that could cure the plague. In the nests of Arabian birds was the
- aspilates, that, according to Democritus, kept the wearer from any
- danger by fire.
- The King of Ceilan rode through his city with a large ruby in his hand,
- at the ceremony of his coronation. The gates of the palace of John the
- Priest were "made of sardius, with the horn of the horned snake
- inwrought, so that no man might bring poison within." Over the gable
- were "two golden apples, in which were two carbuncles," so that the gold
- might shine by day, and the carbuncles by night. In Lodge's strange
- romance "A Margarite of America" it was stated that in the chamber of
- the queen one could behold "all the chaste ladies of the world, inchased
- out of silver, looking through fair mirrours of chrysolites, carbuncles,
- sapphires, and greene emeraults." Marco Polo had seen the inhabitants of
- Zipangu place rose-coloured pearls in the mouths of the dead. A
- sea-monster had been enamoured of the pearl that the diver brought to
- King Perozes, and had slain the thief, and mourned for seven moons over
- its loss. When the Huns lured the king into the great pit, he flung it
- away--Procopius tells the story--nor was it ever found again, though the
- Emperor Anastasius offered five hundred-weight of gold pieces for it.
- The King of Malabar had shown to a certain Venetian a rosary of three
- hundred and four pearls, one for every god that he worshipped.
- When the Duke de Valentinois, son of Alexander VI., visited Louis XII.
- of France, his horse was loaded with gold leaves, according to Brantôme,
- and his cap had double rows of rubles that threw out a great light.
- Charles of England had ridden in stirrups hung with four hundred and
- twenty-one diamonds. Richard II. had a coat, valued at thirty thousand
- marks, which was covered with balas rubies. Hall described Henry VIII.,
- on his way to the Tower previous to his coronation, as wearing "a jacket
- of raised gold, the placard embroidered with diamonds and other rich
- stones, and a great bauderike about his neck of large balasses." The
- favourites of James I. wore earrings of emeralds set in gold filigrane.
- Edward II. gave to Piers Gaveston a suit of red-gold armour studded with
- jacinths, a collar of gold roses set with turquoise-stones, and a
- skull-cap _parsemé_ with pearls. Henry II. wore jewelled gloves
- reaching to the elbow, and had a hawk-glove sewn with twelve rubies and
- fifty-two great orients. The ducal hat of Charles the Rash, the last
- Duke of Burgundy of his race, was hung with pear-shaped pearls, and
- studded with sapphires.
- How exquisite life had once been! How gorgeous in its pomp and
- decoration! Even to read of the luxury of the dead was wonderful.
- Then he turned his attention to embroideries, and to the tapestries that
- performed the office of frescoes in the chill rooms of the Northern
- nations of Europe. As he investigated the subject--and he always had an
- extraordinary faculty of becoming absolutely absorbed for the moment in
- whatever he took up--he was almost saddened by the reflection of the
- ruin that Time brought on beautiful and wonderful things. He, at any
- rate, had escaped that. Summer followed summer, and the yellow jonquils
- bloomed and died many times, and nights of horror repeated the story of
- their shame, but he was unchanged. No winter marred his face or stained
- his flower-like bloom. How different it was with material things! Where
- had they passed to? Where was the great crocus-coloured robe, on which
- the gods fought against the giants, that had been worked by brown girls
- for the pleasure of Athena? Where, the huge velarium that Nero had
- stretched across the Colosseum at Rome, that Titan sail of purple on
- which was represented the starry sky, and Apollo driving a chariot drawn
- by white gilt-reined steeds? He longed to see the curious table-napkins
- wrought for the Priest of the Sun, on which were displayed all the
- dainties and viands that could be wanted for a feast; the mortuary cloth
- of King Chilperic, with its three hundred golden bees; the fantastic
- robes that excited the indignation of the Bishop of Pontus, and were
- figured with "lions, panthers, bears, dogs, forests, rocks,
- hunters--all, in fact, that a painter can copy from nature;" and the
- coat that Charles of Orleans once wore, on the sleeves of which were
- embroidered the verses of a song beginning "_Madame, je suis tout
- joyeux_," the musical accompaniment of the words being wrought in gold
- thread, and each note, of square shape in those days, formed with four
- pearls. He read of the room that was prepared at the palace at Rheims
- for the use of Queen Joan of Burgundy, and was decorated with "thirteen
- hundred and twenty-one parrots, made in broidery, and blazoned with the
- king's arms, and five hundred and sixty-one butterflies, whose wings
- were similarly ornamented with the arms of the queen, the whole worked
- in gold." Catherine de Médicis had a mourning-bed made for her of black
- velvet powdered with crescents and suns. Its curtains were of damask,
- with leafy wreaths and garlands, figured upon a gold and silver ground,
- and fringed along the edges with broideries of pearls, and it stood in a
- room hung with rows of the queen's devices in cut black velvet upon
- cloth of silver. Louis XIV. had gold embroidered caryatides fifteen feet
- high in his apartment. The state bed of Sobieski, King of Poland, was
- made of Smyrna gold brocade embroidered in turquoises with verses from
- the Koran. Its supports were of silver gilt, beautifully chased, and
- profusely set with enamelled and jewelled medallions. It had been taken
- from the Turkish camp before Vienna, and the standard of Mohammed had
- stood beneath the tremulous gilt of its canopy.
- And so, for a whole year, he sought to accumulate the most exquisite
- specimens that he could find of textile and embroidered work, getting
- the dainty Delhi muslins, finely wrought with gold-thread palmates, and
- stitched over with iridescent beetles' wings; the Dacca gauzes, that
- from their transparency are known in the East as "woven air," and
- "running water," and "evening dew"; strange figured cloths from Java;
- elaborate yellow Chinese hangings; books bound in tawny satins or fair
- blue silks, and wrought with _fleurs de lys_, birds, and images; veils
- of _lacis_ worked in Hungary point; Sicilian brocades, and stiff
- Spanish velvets; Georgian work with its gilt coins, and Japanese
- _Foukousas_ with their green-toned golds and their marvellously-plumaged
- birds.
- He had a special passion, also, for ecclesiastical vestments, as indeed
- he had for everything connected with the service of the Church. In the
- long cedar chests that lined the west gallery of his house he had stored
- away many rare and beautiful specimens of what is really the raiment of
- the Bride of Christ, who must wear purple and jewels and fine linen that
- she may hide the pallid macerated body that is worn by the suffering
- that she seeks for, and wounded by self-inflicted pain. He possessed a
- gorgeous cope of crimson silk and gold-thread damask, figured with a
- repeating pattern of golden pomegranates set in six-petalled formal
- blossoms, beyond which on either side was the pine-apple device wrought
- in seed-pearls. The orphreys were divided into panels representing
- scenes from the life of the Virgin, and the coronation of the Virgin was
- figured in coloured silks upon the hood. This was Italian work of the
- fifteenth century. Another cope was of green velvet, embroidered with
- heart-shaped groups of acanthus-leaves, from which spread long-stemmed
- white blossoms, the details of which were picked out with silver thread
- and coloured crystals. The morse bore a seraph's head in gold-thread
- raised work. The orphreys were woven in a diaper of red and gold silk,
- and were starred with medallions of many saints and martyrs, among whom
- was St. Sebastian. He had chasubles, also, of amber-coloured silk, and
- blue silk and gold brocade, and yellow silk damask and cloth of gold,
- figured with representations of the Passion and Crucifixion of Christ,
- and embroidered with lions and peacocks and other emblems; dalmatics of
- white satin and pink silk damask, decorated with tulips and dolphins and
- _fleurs de lys_; altar frontals of crimson velvet and blue linen; and
- many corporals, chalice-veils, and sudaria. In the mystic offices to
- which such things were put, there was something that quickened his
- imagination.
- For these treasures, and everything that he collected in his lovely
- house, were to be to him means of forgetfulness, modes by which he could
- escape, for a season, from the fear that seemed to him at times to be
- almost too great to be borne. Upon the walls of the lonely locked room
- where he had spent so much of his boyhood, he had hung with his own
- hands the terrible portrait whose changing features showed him the real
- degradation of his life, and in front of it had draped the
- purple-and-gold pall as a curtain. For weeks he would not go there,
- would forget the hideous painted thing, and get back his light heart,
- his wonderful joyousness, his passionate absorption in mere existence.
- Then, suddenly, some night he would creep out of the house, go down to
- dreadful places near Blue Gate Fields, and stay there, day after day,
- until he was driven away. On his return he would sit in front of the
- picture, sometimes loathing it and himself, but filled, at other times,
- with that pride of individualism that is half the fascination of sin,
- and smiling with secret pleasure, at the misshapen shadow that had to
- bear the burden that should have been his own.
- After a few years he could not endure to be long out of England, and
- gave up the villa that he had shared at Trouville with Lord Henry, as
- well as the little white walled-in house at Algiers where they had more
- than once spent the winter. He hated to be separated from the picture
- that was such a part of his life, and was also afraid that during his
- absence someone might gain access to the room, in spite of the elaborate
- bars that he had caused to be placed upon the door.
- He was quite conscious that this would tell them nothing. It was true
- that the portrait still preserved, under all the foulness and ugliness
- of the face, its marked likeness to himself; but what could they learn
- from that? He would laugh at anyone who tried to taunt him. He had not
- painted it. What was it to him how vile and full of shame it looked?
- Even if he told them, would they believe it?
- Yet he was afraid. Sometimes when he was down at his great house in
- Nottinghamshire, entertaining the fashionable young men of his own rank
- who were his chief companions, and astounding the county by the wanton
- luxury and gorgeous splendour of his mode of life, he would suddenly
- leave his guests and rush back to town to see that the door had not been
- tampered with, and that the picture was still there. What if it should
- be stolen? The mere thought made him cold with horror. Surely the world
- would know his secret then. Perhaps the world already suspected it.
- For, while he fascinated many, there were not a few who distrusted him.
- He was very nearly blackballed at a West End club of which his birth and
- social position fully entitled him to become a member, and it was said
- that on one occasion when he was brought by a friend into the
- smoking-room of the Churchill, the Duke of Berwick and another gentleman
- got up in a marked manner and went out. Curious stories became current
- about him after he had passed his twenty-fifth year. It was rumoured
- that he had been seen brawling with foreign sailors in a low den in the
- distant parts of Whitechapel, and that he consorted with thieves and
- coiners and knew the mysteries of their trade. His extraordinary
- absences became notorious, and, when he used to reappear again in
- society, men would whisper to each other in corners, or pass him with a
- sneer, or look at him with cold searching eyes, as though they were
- determined to discover his secret.
- Of such insolences and attempted slights he, of course, took no notice,
- and in the opinion of most people his frank debonair manner, his
- charming boyish smile, and the infinite grace of that wonderful youth
- that seemed never to leave him, were in themselves a sufficient answer
- to the calumnies, for so they termed them, that were circulated about
- him. It was remarked, however, that some of those who had been most
- intimate with him appeared, after a time, to shun him. Women who had
- wildly adored him, and for his sake had braved all social censure and
- set convention at defiance, were seen to grow pallid with shame or
- horror if Dorian Gray entered the room.
- Yet these whispered scandals only increased, in the eyes of many, his
- strange and dangerous charm. His great wealth was a certain element of
- security. Society, civilised society at least, is never very ready to
- believe anything to the detriment of those who are both rich and
- fascinating. It feels instinctively that manners are of more importance
- than morals, and, in its opinion, the highest respectability is of much
- less value than the possession of a good _chef_. And, after all, it is a
- very poor consolation to be told that the man who has given one a bad
- dinner, or poor wine, is irreproachable in his private life. Even the
- cardinal virtues cannot atone for half-cold _entrées_, as Lord Henry
- remarked once, in a discussion on the subject; and there is possibly a
- good deal to be said for his view. For the canons of good society are,
- or should be, the same as the canons of art. Form is absolutely
- essential to it. It should have the dignity of a ceremony, as well as
- its unreality, and should combine the insincere character of a romantic
- play with the wit and beauty that make such plays delightful to us. Is
- insincerity such a terrible thing? I think not. It is merely a method by
- which we can multiply our personalities.
- Such, at any rate, was Dorian Gray's opinion. He used to wonder at the
- shallow psychology of those who conceive the Ego in man as a thing
- simple, permanent, reliable, and of one essence. To him, man was a being
- with myriad lives and myriad sensations, a complex multiform creature
- that bore within itself strange legacies of thought and passion, and
- whose very flesh was tainted with the monstrous maladies of the dead. He
- loved to stroll through the gaunt cold picture-gallery of his country
- house and look at the various portraits of those whose blood flowed in
- his veins. Here was Philip Herbert, described by Francis Osborne, in
- his "Memoires on the Reigns of Queen Elizabeth and King James," as one
- who was "caressed by the Court for his handsome face, which kept him not
- long company." Was it young Herbert's life that he sometimes led? Had
- some strange poisonous germ crept from body to body till it had reached
- his own? Was it some dim sense of that ruined grace that had made him so
- suddenly, and almost without cause, give utterance, in Basil Hallward's
- studio, to the mad prayer that had so changed his life? Here, in
- gold-embroidered red doublet, jewelled surcoat, and gilt-edged ruff and
- wrist-bands, stood Sir Anthony Sherard, with his silver-and-black armour
- piled at his feet. What had this man's legacy been? Had the lover of
- Giovanna of Naples bequeathed him some inheritance of sin and shame?
- Were his own actions merely the dreams that the dead man had not dared
- to realise? Here, from the fading canvas, smiled Lady Elizabeth
- Devereux, in her gauze hood, pearl stomacher, and pink slashed sleeves.
- A flower was in her right hand, and her left clasped an enamelled collar
- of white and damask roses. On a table by her side lay a mandolin and an
- apple. There were large green rosettes upon her little pointed shoes. He
- knew her life, and the strange stories that were told about her lovers.
- Had he something of her temperament in him? These oval heavy-lidded eyes
- seemed to look curiously at him. What of George Willoughby, with his
- powdered hair and fantastic patches? How evil he looked! The face was
- saturnine and swarthy, and the sensual lips seemed to be twisted with
- disdain. Delicate lace ruffles fell over the lean yellow hands that were
- so over-laden with rings. He had been a macaroni of the eighteenth
- century, and the friend, in his youth, of Lord Ferrars. What of the
- second Lord Beckenham, the companion of the Prince Regent in his wildest
- days, and one of the witnesses at the secret marriage with Mrs.
- Fitzherbert? How proud and handsome he was, with his chestnut curls and
- insolent pose! What passions had he bequeathed? The world had looked
- upon him as infamous. He had led the orgies at Carlton House. The star
- of the Garter glittered upon his breast. Beside him hung the portrait of
- his wife, a pallid, thin-lipped woman in black. Her blood, also, stirred
- within him. How curious it all seemed! And his mother with her Lady
- Hamilton face, and her moist wine-dashed lips--he knew what he had got
- from her. He had got from her his beauty, and his passion for the beauty
- of others. She laughed at him in her loose Bacchante dress. There were
- vine leaves in her hair. The purple spilled from the cup she was
- holding. The carnations of the painting had withered, but the eyes were
- still wonderful in their depth and brilliancy of colour. They seemed to
- follow him wherever he went.
- Yet one had ancestors in literature, as well as in one's own race,
- nearer perhaps in type and temperament, many of them, and certainly with
- an influence of which one was more absolutely conscious. There were
- times when it appeared to Dorian Gray that the whole of history was
- merely the record of his own life, not as he had lived it in act and
- circumstance, but as his imagination had created it for him, as it had
- been in his brain and in his passions. He felt that he had known them
- all, those strange terrible figures that had passed across the stage of
- the world and made sin so marvellous, and evil so full of subtlety. It
- seemed to him that in some mysterious way their lives had been his own.
- The hero of the wonderful novel that had so influenced his life had
- himself known this curious fancy. In the seventh chapter he tells how,
- crowned with laurel, lest lightning might strike him, he had sat, as
- Tiberius, in a garden at Capri, reading the shameful books of
- Elephantis, while dwarfs and peacocks strutted round him, and the
- flute-player mocked the swinger of the censer; and, as Caligula, had
- caroused with the green-shirted jockeys in their stables and supped in
- an ivory manger with a jewel-frontleted horse; and, as Domitian, had
- wandered through a corridor lined with marble mirrors, looking round
- with haggard eyes for the reflection of the dagger that was to end his
- days, and sick with that ennui, that terrible _tædium vitæ_, that comes
- on those to whom life denies nothing; and had peered through a clear
- emerald at the red shambles of the Circus, and then, in a litter of
- pearl and purple drawn by silver-shod mules, been carried through the
- Street of Pomegranates to a House of Gold, and heard men cry on Nero
- Cæsar as he passed by; and, as Elagabalus, had painted his face with
- colours, and plied the distaff among the women, and brought the Moon
- from Carthage, and given her in mystic marriage to the Sun.
- Over and over again Dorian used to read this fantastic chapter, and the
- two chapters immediately following, in which, as in some curious
- tapestries or cunningly-wrought enamels, were pictured the awful and
- beautiful forms of those whom Vice and Blood and Weariness had made
- monstrous or mad: Filippo, Duke of Milan, who slew his wife, and painted
- her lips with a scarlet poison that her lover might suck death from the
- dead thing he fondled; Pietro Barbi, the Venetian, known as Paul the
- Second, who sought in his vanity to assume the title of Formosus, and
- whose tiara, valued at two hundred thousand florins, was bought at the
- price of a terrible sin; Gian Maria Visconti, who used hounds to chase
- living men, and whose murdered body was covered with roses by a harlot
- who had loved him; the Borgia on his white horse, with Fratricide riding
- beside him, and his mantle stained with the blood of Perotto; Pietro
- Riario, the young Cardinal Archbishop of Florence, child and minion of
- Sixtus IV., whose beauty was equalled only by his debauchery, and who
- received Leonora of Aragon in a pavilion of white and crimson silk,
- filled with nymphs and centaurs, and gilded a boy that he might serve at
- the feast as Ganymede or Hylas; Ezzelin, whose melancholy could be cured
- only by the spectacle of death, and who had a passion for red blood, as
- other men have for red wine--the son of the Fiend, as was reported, and
- one who had cheated his father at dice when gambling with him for his
- own soul; Giambattista Cibo, who in mockery took the name of Innocent,
- and into whose torpid veins the blood of three lads was infused by a
- Jewish doctor; Sigismondo Malatesta, the lover of Isotta, and the lord
- of Rimini, whose effigy was burned at Rome as the enemy of God and man,
- who strangled Polyssena with a napkin, and gave poison to Ginevra d'Este
- in a cup of emerald, and in honour of a shameful passion built a pagan
- church for Christian worship; Charles VI., who had so wildly adored his
- brother's wife that a leper had warned him of the insanity that was
- coming on him, and who, when his brain had sickened and grown strange,
- could only be soothed by Saracen cards painted with the images of Love
- and Death and Madness; and, in his trimmed jerkin and jewelled cap and
- acanthus-like curls, Grifonetto Baglioni, who slew Astorre with his
- bride, and Simonetto with his page, and whose comeliness was such that,
- as he lay dying in the yellow piazza of Perugia, those who had hated him
- could not choose but weep, and Atalanta, who had cursed him, blessed
- him.
- There was a horrible fascination in them all. He saw them at night, and
- they troubled his imagination in the day. The Renaissance knew of
- strange manners of poisoning--poisoning by a helmet and a lighted torch,
- by an embroidered glove and a jewelled fan, by a gilded pomander and by
- an amber chain. Dorian Gray had been poisoned by a book. There were
- moments when he looked on evil simply as a mode through which he could
- realise his conception of the beautiful.
- CHAPTER XII
- It was on the ninth of November, the eve of his own thirty-eighth
- birthday, as he often remembered afterwards.
- He was walking home about eleven o'clock from Lord Henry's, where he had
- been dining, and was wrapped in heavy furs, as the night was cold and
- foggy. At the corner of Grosvenor Square and South Audley Street a man
- passed him in the mist, walking very fast, and with the collar of his
- grey ulster turned up. He had a bag in his hand. Dorian recognised him.
- It was Basil Hallward. A strange sense of fear, for which he could not
- account, came over him. He made no sign of recognition, and went on
- quickly in the direction of his own house.
- But Hallward had seen him. Dorian heard him first stopping on the
- pavement, and then hurrying after him. In a few moments his hand was on
- his arm.
- "Dorian! What an extraordinary piece of luck! I have been waiting for
- you in your library ever since nine o'clock. Finally I took pity on your
- tired servant, and told him to go to bed, as he let me out. I am off to
- Paris by the midnight train, and I particularly wanted to see you before
- I left. I thought it was you, or rather your fur coat, as you passed me.
- But I wasn't quite sure. Didn't you recognise me?"
- "In this fog, my dear Basil? Why, I can't even recognise Grosvenor
- Square. I believe my house is somewhere about here, but I don't feel at
- all certain about it. I am sorry you are going away, as I have not seen
- you for ages. But I suppose you will be back soon?"
- "No: I am going to be out of England for six months. I intend to take a
- studio in Paris, and shut myself up till I have finished a great picture
- I have in my head. However, it wasn't about myself I wanted to talk.
- Here we are at your door. Let me come in for a moment. I have something
- to say to you."
- "I shall be charmed. But won't you miss your train?" said Dorian Gray,
- languidly, as he passed up the steps and opened the door with his
- latch-key.
- The lamp-light struggled out through the fog, and Hallward looked at his
- watch. "I have heaps of time," he answered. "The train doesn't go till
- twelve-fifteen, and it is only just eleven. In fact, I was on my way to
- the club to look for you, when I met you. You see, I shan't have any
- delay about luggage, as I have sent on my heavy things. All I have with
- me is in this bag, and I can easily get to Victoria in twenty minutes."
- Dorian looked at him and smiled. "What a way for a fashionable painter
- to travel! A Gladstone bag, and an ulster! Come in, or the fog will get
- into the house. And mind you don't talk about anything serious. Nothing
- is serious nowadays. At least nothing should be."
- Hallward shook his head as he entered, and followed Dorian into the
- library. There was a bright wood fire blazing in the large open hearth.
- The lamps were lit, and an open Dutch silver spirit-case stood, with
- some siphons of soda-water and large cut-glass tumblers, on a little
- marqueterie table.
- "You see your servant made me quite at home, Dorian. He gave me
- everything I wanted, including your best gold-tipped cigarettes. He is a
- most hospitable creature. I like him much better than the Frenchman you
- used to have. What has become of the Frenchman, by the bye?"
- Dorian shrugged his shoulders. "I believe he married Lady Radley's
- maid, and has established her in Paris as an English dressmaker.
- _Anglomanie_ is very fashionable over there now, I hear. It seems silly
- of the French, doesn't it? But--do you know?--he was not at all a bad
- servant. I never liked him, but I had nothing to complain about. One
- often imagines things that are quite absurd. He was really very devoted
- to me, and seemed quite sorry when he went away. Have another
- brandy-and-soda? Or would you like hock-and-seltzer? I always take
- hock-and-seltzer myself. There is sure to be some in the next room."
- "Thanks, I won't have anything more," said the painter, taking his cap
- and coat off, and throwing them on the bag that he had placed in the
- corner. "And now, my dear fellow, I want to speak to you seriously.
- Don't frown like that. You make it so much more difficult for me."
- "What is it all about?" cried Dorian, in his petulant way, flinging
- himself down on the sofa. "I hope it is not about myself. I am tired of
- myself to-night. I should like to be somebody else."
- "It is about yourself," answered Hallward, in his grave, deep voice,
- "and I must say it to you. I shall only keep you half an hour."
- Dorian sighed, and lit a cigarette. "Half an hour!" he murmured.
- "It is not much to ask of you, Dorian, and it is entirely for your own
- sake that I am speaking. I think it right that you should know that the
- most dreadful things are being said against you in London."
- "I don't wish to know anything about them. I love scandals about other
- people, but scandals about myself don't interest me. They have not got
- the charm of novelty."
- "They must interest you, Dorian. Every gentleman is interested in his
- good name. You don't want people to talk of you as something vile and
- degraded. Of course you have your position, and your wealth, and all
- that kind of thing. But position and wealth are not everything. Mind
- you, I don't believe these rumours at all. At least, I can't believe
- them when I see you. Sin is a thing that writes itself across a man's
- face. It cannot be concealed. People talk sometimes of secret vices.
- There are no such things. If a wretched man has a vice, it shows itself
- in the lines of his mouth, the droop of his eyelids, the moulding of his
- hands even. Somebody--I won't mention his name, but you know him--came
- to me last year to have his portrait done. I had never seen him before,
- and had never heard anything about him at the time, though I have heard
- a good deal since. He offered an extravagant price. I refused him. There
- was something in the shape of his fingers that I hated. I know now that
- I was quite right in what I fancied about him. His life is dreadful. But
- you, Dorian, with your pure, bright, innocent face, and your marvellous
- untroubled youth--I can't believe anything against you. And yet I see
- you very seldom, and you never come down to the studio now, and when I
- am away from you, and I hear all these hideous things that people are
- whispering about you, I don't know what to say. Why is it, Dorian, that
- a man like the Duke of Berwick leaves the room of a club when you enter
- it? Why is it that so many gentlemen in London will neither go to your
- house nor invite you to theirs? You used to be a friend of Lord
- Staveley. I met him at dinner last week. Your name happened to come up
- in conversation, in connection with the miniatures you have lent to the
- exhibition at the Dudley. Staveley curled his lip, and said that you
- might have the most artistic tastes, but that you were a man whom no
- pure-minded girl should be allowed to know, and whom no chaste woman
- should sit in the same room with. I reminded him that I was a friend of
- yours, and asked him what he meant. He told me. He told me right out
- before everybody. It was horrible! Why is your friendship so fatal to
- young men? There was that wretched boy in the Guards who committed
- suicide. You were his great friend. There was Sir Henry Ashton, who had
- to leave England, with a tarnished name. You and he were inseparable.
- What about Adrian Singleton, and his dreadful end? What about Lord
- Kent's only son, and his career? I met his father yesterday in St.
- James's Street. He seemed broken with shame and sorrow. What about the
- young Duke of Perth? What sort of life has he got now? What gentleman
- would associate with him?"
- "Stop, Basil. You are talking about things of which you know nothing,"
- said Dorian Gray, biting his lip, and with a note of infinite contempt
- in his voice. "You ask me why Berwick leaves a room when I enter it. It
- is because I know everything about his life, not because he knows
- anything about mine. With such blood as he has in his veins, how could
- his record be clean? You ask me about Henry Ashton and young Perth. Did
- I teach the one his vices, and the other his debauchery? If Kent's silly
- son takes his wife from the streets what is that to me? If Adrian
- Singleton writes his friend's name across a bill, am I his keeper? I
- know how people chatter in England. The middle classes air their moral
- prejudices over their gross dinner-tables, and whisper about what they
- call the profligacies of their betters in order to try and pretend that
- they are in smart society, and on intimate terms with the people they
- slander. In this country it is enough for a man to have distinction and
- brains for every common tongue to wag against him. And what sort of
- lives do these people, who pose as being moral, lead themselves? My dear
- fellow, you forget that we are in the native land of the hypocrite."
- "Dorian," cried Hallward, "that is not the question. England is bad
- enough, I know, and English society is all wrong. That is the reason why
- I want you to be fine. You have not been fine. One has a right to judge
- of a man by the effect he has over his friends. Yours seem to lose all
- sense of honour, of goodness, of purity. You have filled them with a
- madness for pleasure. They have gone down into the depths. You led them
- there. Yes: you led them there, and yet you can smile, as you are
- smiling now. And there is worse behind. I know you and Harry are
- inseparable. Surely for that reason, if for none other, you should not
- have made his sister's name a by-word."
- "Take care, Basil. You go too far."
- "I must speak, and you must listen. You shall listen. When you met Lady
- Gwendolen, not a breath of scandal had ever touched her. Is there a
- single decent woman in London now who would drive with her in the Park?
- Why, even her children are not allowed to live with her. Then there are
- other stories--stories that you have been seen creeping at dawn out of
- dreadful houses and slinking in disguise into the foulest dens in
- London. Are they true? Can they be true? When I first heard them, I
- laughed. I hear them now, and they make me shudder. What about your
- country house, and the life that is led there? Dorian, you don't know
- what is said about you. I won't tell you that I don't want to preach to
- you. I remember Harry saying once that every man who turned himself into
- an amateur curate for the moment always began by saying that, and then
- proceeded to break his word. I do want to preach to you. I want you to
- lead such a life as will make the world respect you. I want you to have
- a clean name and a fair record. I want you to get rid of the dreadful
- people you associate with. Don't shrug your shoulders like that. Don't
- be so indifferent. You have a wonderful influence. Let it be for good,
- not for evil. They say that you corrupt everyone with whom you become
- intimate, and that it is quite sufficient for you to enter a house, for
- shame of some kind to follow after. I don't know whether it is so or
- not. How should I know? But it is said of you. I am told things that it
- seems impossible to doubt. Lord Gloucester was one of my greatest
- friends at Oxford. He showed me a letter that his wife had written to
- him when she was dying alone in her villa at Mentone. Your name was
- implicated in the most terrible confession I ever read. I told him that
- it was absurd--that I knew you thoroughly, and that you were incapable
- of anything of the kind. Know you? I wonder do I know you? Before I
- could answer that, I should have to see your soul."
- "To see my soul!" muttered Dorian Gray, starting up from the sofa and
- turning almost white from fear.
- "Yes," answered Hallward, gravely, and with deep-toned sorrow in his
- voice--"to see your soul. But only God can do that."
- A bitter laugh of mockery broke from the lips of the younger man. "You
- shall see it yourself, to-night!" he cried, seizing a lamp from the
- table. "Come: it is your own handiwork. Why shouldn't you look at it?
- You can tell the world all about it afterwards, if you choose. Nobody
- would believe you. If they did believe you, they would like me all the
- better for it. I know the age better than you do, though you will prate
- about it so tediously. Come, I tell you. You have chattered enough about
- corruption. Now you shall look on it face to face."
- There was the madness of pride in every word he uttered. He stamped his
- foot upon the ground in his boyish insolent manner. He felt a terrible
- joy at the thought that someone else was to share his secret, and that
- the man who had painted the portrait that was the origin of all his
- shame was to be burdened for the rest of his life with the hideous
- memory of what he had done.
- "Yes," he continued, coming closer to him, and looking steadfastly into
- his stern eyes, "I shall show you my soul. You shall see the thing that
- you fancy only God can see."
- Hallward started back. "This is blasphemy, Dorian!" he cried. "You must
- not say things like that. They are horrible, and they don't mean
- anything."
- "You think so?" He laughed again.
- "I know so. As for what I said to you to-night, I said it for your good.
- You know I have been always a staunch friend to you."
- "Don't touch me. Finish what you have to say."
- A twisted flash of pain shot across the painter's face. He paused for a
- moment, and a wild feeling of pity came over him. After all, what right
- had he to pry into the life of Dorian Gray? If he had done a tithe of
- what was rumoured about him, how much he must have suffered! Then he
- straightened himself up, and walked over to the fireplace, and stood
- there, looking at the burning logs with their frost-like ashes and their
- throbbing cores of flame.
- "I am waiting, Basil," said the young man, in a hard, clear voice.
- He turned round. "What I have to say is this," he cried. "You must give
- me some answer to these horrible charges that are made against you. If
- you tell me that they are absolutely untrue from beginning to end, I
- shall believe you. Deny them, Dorian, deny them! Can't you see what I am
- going through? My God! don't tell me that you are bad, and corrupt, and
- shameful."
- Dorian Gray smiled. There was a curl of contempt in his lips. "Come
- upstairs, Basil," he said, quietly. "I keep a diary of my life from day
- to day, and it never leaves the room in which it is written. I shall
- show it to you if you come with me."
- "I shall come with you, Dorian, if you wish it. I see I have missed my
- train. That makes no matter. I can go to-morrow. But don't ask me to
- read anything to-night. All I want is a plain answer to my question."
- "That shall be given to you upstairs. I could not give it here. You will
- not have to read long."
- CHAPTER XIII
- He passed out of the room, and began the ascent, Basil Hallward
- following close behind. They walked softly, as men do instinctively at
- night. The lamp cast fantastic shadows on the wall and staircase. A
- rising wind made some of the windows rattle.
- When they reached the top landing, Dorian set the lamp down on the
- floor, and taking out the key turned it in the lock. "You insist on
- knowing, Basil?" he asked, in a low voice.
- "Yes."
- "I am delighted," he answered, smiling. Then he added, somewhat harshly,
- "You are the one man in the world who is entitled to know everything
- about me. You have had more to do with my life than you think:" and,
- taking up the lamp, he opened the door and went in. A cold current of
- air passed them, and the light shot up for a moment in a flame of murky
- orange. He shuddered. "Shut the door behind you," he whispered, as he
- placed the lamp on the table.
- Hallward glanced round him, with a puzzled expression. The room looked
- as if it had not been lived in for years. A faded Flemish tapestry, a
- curtained picture, an old Italian _cassone_, and an almost empty
- bookcase--that was all that it seemed to contain, besides a chair and a
- table. As Dorian Gray was lighting a half-burned candle that was
- standing on the mantel-shelf, he saw that the whole place was covered
- with dust, and that the carpet was in holes. A mouse ran scuffling
- behind the wainscoting. There was a damp odour of mildew.
- "So you think that it is only God who sees the soul, Basil? Draw that
- curtain back, and you will see mine."
- The voice that spoke was cold and cruel. "You are mad, Dorian, or
- playing a part," muttered Hallward, frowning.
- "You won't? Then I must do it myself," said the young man; and he tore
- the curtain from its rod, and flung it on the ground.
- An exclamation of horror broke from the painter's lips as he saw in the
- dim light the hideous face on the canvas grinning at him. There was
- something in its expression that filled him with disgust and loathing.
- Good heavens! it was Dorian Gray's own face that he was looking at! The
- horror, whatever it was, had not yet entirely spoiled that marvellous
- beauty. There was still some gold in the thinning hair and some scarlet
- on the sensual mouth. The sodden eyes had kept something of the
- loveliness of their blue, the noble curves had not yet completely passed
- away from chiselled nostrils and from plastic throat. Yes, it was Dorian
- himself. But who had done it? He seemed to recognise his own brush-work,
- and the frame was his own design. The idea was monstrous, yet he felt
- afraid. He seized the lighted candle, and held it to the picture. In the
- left-hand corner was his own name, traced in long letters of bright
- vermilion.
- It was some foul parody, some infamous, ignoble satire. He had never
- done that. Still, it was his own picture. He knew it, and he felt as if
- his blood had changed in a moment from fire to sluggish ice. His own
- picture! What did it mean? Why had it altered? He turned, and looked at
- Dorian Gray with the eyes of a sick man. His mouth twitched, and his
- parched tongue seemed unable to articulate. He passed his hand across
- his forehead. It was dank with clammy sweat.
- The young man was leaning against the mantel-shelf, watching him with
- that strange expression that one sees on the faces of those who are
- absorbed in a play when some great artist is acting. There was neither
- real sorrow in it nor real joy. There was simply the passion of the
- spectator, with perhaps a flicker of triumph in his eyes. He had taken
- the flower out of his coat, and was smelling it, or pretending to do so.
- "What does this mean?" cried Hallward, at last. His own voice sounded
- shrill and curious in his ears.
- "Years ago, when I was a boy," said Dorian Gray, crushing the flower in
- his hand, "you met me, flattered me, and taught me to be vain of my good
- looks. One day you introduced me to a friend of yours, who explained to
- me the wonder of youth, and you finished the portrait of me that
- revealed to me the wonder of beauty. In a mad moment, that, even now, I
- don't know whether I regret or not, I made a wish, perhaps you would
- call it a prayer...."
- "I remember it! Oh, how well I remember it! No! the thing is impossible.
- The room is damp. Mildew has got into the canvas. The paints I used had
- some wretched mineral poison in them. I tell you the thing is
- impossible."
- "Ah, what is impossible?" murmured the young man, going over to the
- window, and leaning his forehead against the cold, mist-stained glass.
- "You told me you had destroyed it."
- "I was wrong. It has destroyed me."
- "I don't believe it is my picture."
- "Can't you see your ideal in it?" said Dorian, bitterly.
- "My ideal, as you call it...."
- "As you called it."
- "There was nothing evil in it, nothing shameful. You were to me such an
- ideal as I shall never meet again. This is the face of a satyr."
- "It is the face of my soul."
- "Christ! what a thing I must have worshipped! It has the eyes of a
- devil."
- "Each of us has Heaven and Hell in him, Basil," cried Dorian, with a
- wild gesture of despair.
- Hallward turned again to the portrait, and gazed at it. "My God! if it
- is true," he exclaimed, "and this is what you have done with your life,
- why, you must be worse even than those who talk against you fancy you to
- be!" He held the light up again to the canvas, and examined it. The
- surface seemed to be quite undisturbed, and as he had left it. It was
- from within, apparently, that the foulness and horror had come. Through
- some strange quickening of inner life the leprosies of sin were slowly
- eating the thing away. The rotting of a corpse in a watery grave was not
- so fearful.
- His hand shook, and the candle fell from its socket on the floor, and
- lay there sputtering. He placed his foot on it and put it out. Then he
- flung himself into the rickety chair that was standing by the table and
- buried his face in his hands.
- "Good God, Dorian, what a lesson! what an awful lesson!" There was no
- answer, but he could hear the young man sobbing at the window. "Pray,
- Dorian, pray," he murmured. "What is it that one was taught to say in
- one's boyhood? 'Lead us not into temptation. Forgive us our sins. Wash
- away our iniquities.' Let us say that together. The prayer of your pride
- has been answered. The prayer of your repentance will be answered also.
- I worshipped you too much. I am punished for it. You worshipped yourself
- too much. We are both punished."
- Dorian Gray turned slowly around, and looked at him with tear-dimmed
- eyes. "It is too late, Basil," he faltered.
- "It is never too late, Dorian. Let us kneel down and try if we cannot
- remember a prayer. Isn't there a verse somewhere, 'Though your sins be
- as scarlet; yet I will make them as white as snow'?"
- "Those words mean nothing to me now."
- "Hush! don't say that. You have done enough evil in your life. My God!
- don't you see that accursed thing leering at us?"
- Dorian Gray glanced at the picture, and suddenly an uncontrollable
- feeling of hatred for Basil Hallward came over him, as though it had
- been suggested to him by the image on the canvas, whispered into his ear
- by those grinning lips. The mad passions of a hunted animal stirred
- within him, and he loathed the man who was seated at the table, more
- than in his whole life he had ever loathed anything. He glanced wildly
- around. Something glimmered on the top of the painted chest that faced
- him. His eye fell on it. He knew what it was. It was a knife that he had
- brought up, some days before, to cut a piece of cord, and had forgotten
- to take away with him. He moved slowly towards it, passing Hallward as
- he did so. As soon as he got behind him, he seized it, and turned round.
- Hallward stirred in his chair as if he was going to rise. He rushed at
- him, and dug the knife into the great vein that is behind the ear,
- crushing the man's head down on the table, and stabbing again and again.
- There was a stifled groan, and the horrible sound of someone choking
- with blood. Three times the outstretched arms shot up convulsively,
- waving grotesque stiff-fingered hands in the air. He stabbed him twice
- more, but the man did not move. Something began to trickle on the floor.
- He waited for a moment, still pressing the head down. Then he threw the
- knife on the table, and listened.
- He could hear nothing but the drip, drip on the threadbare carpet. He
- opened the door and went out on the landing. The house was absolutely
- quiet. No one was about. For a few seconds he stood bending over the
- balustrade, and peering down into the black seething well of darkness.
- Then he took out the key and returned to the room, locking himself in as
- he did so.
- The thing was still seated in the chair, straining over the table with
- bowed head, and humped back, and long fantastic arms. Had it not been
- for the red jagged tear in the neck, and the clotted black pool that was
- slowly widening on the table, one would have said that the man was
- simply asleep.
- How quickly it had all been done! He felt strangely calm, and, walking
- over to the window, opened it, and stepped out on the balcony. The wind
- had blown the fog away, and the sky was like a monstrous peacock's tail,
- starred with myriads of golden eyes. He looked down, and saw the
- policeman going his rounds and flashing the long beam of his lantern on
- the doors of the silent houses. The crimson spot of a prowling hansom
- gleamed at the corner, and then vanished. A woman in a fluttering shawl
- was creeping slowly by the railings, staggering as she went. Now and
- then she stopped, and peered back. Once, she began to sing in a hoarse
- voice. The policeman strolled over and said something to her. She
- stumbled away, laughing. A bitter blast swept across the Square. The
- gas-lamps flickered, and became blue, and the leafless trees shook their
- black iron branches to and fro. He shivered, and went back, closing the
- window behind him.
- Having reached the door, he turned the key, and opened it. He did not
- even glance at the murdered man. He felt that the secret of the whole
- thing was not to realise the situation. The friend who had painted the
- fatal portrait to which all his misery had been due, had gone out of his
- life. That was enough.
- Then he remembered the lamp. It was a rather curious one of Moorish
- workmanship, made of dull silver inlaid with arabesques of burnished
- steel, and studded with coarse turquoises. Perhaps it might be missed by
- his servant, and questions would be asked. He hesitated for a moment,
- then he turned back and took it from the table. He could not help seeing
- the dead thing. How still it was! How horribly white the long hands
- looked! It was like a dreadful wax image.
- Having locked the door behind him, he crept quietly downstairs. The
- woodwork creaked, and seemed to cry out as if in pain. He stopped
- several times, and waited. No: everything was still. It was merely the
- sound of his own footsteps.
- When he reached the library, he saw the bag and coat in the corner. They
- must be hidden away somewhere. He unlocked a secret press that was in
- the wainscoting, a press in which he kept his own curious disguises, and
- put them into it. He could easily burn them afterwards. Then he pulled
- out his watch. It was twenty minutes to two.
- He sat down, and began to think. Every year--every month, almost--men
- were strangled in England for what he had done. There had been a madness
- of murder in the air. Some red star had come too close to the earth....
- And yet what evidence was there against him? Basil Hallward had left the
- house at eleven. No one had seen him come in again. Most of the servants
- were at Selby Royal. His valet had gone to bed.... Paris! Yes. It was to
- Paris that Basil had gone, and by the midnight train, as he had
- intended. With his curious reserved habits, it would be months before
- any suspicions would be aroused. Months! Everything could be destroyed
- long before then.
- A sudden thought struck him. He put on his fur coat and hat, and went
- out into the hall. There he paused, hearing the slow heavy tread of the
- policeman on the pavement outside, and seeing the flash of the
- bull's-eye reflected in the window. He waited, and held his breath.
- After a few moments he drew back the latch, and slipped out, shutting
- the door very gently behind him. Then he began ringing the bell. In
- about five minutes his valet appeared half dressed, and looking very
- drowsy.
- "I am sorry to have had to wake you up, Francis," he said, stepping in;
- "but I had forgotten my latch-key. What time is it?"
- "Ten minutes past two, sir," answered the man, looking at the clock and
- blinking.
- "Ten minutes past two? How horribly late! You must wake me at nine
- to-morrow. I have some work to do."
- "All right, sir."
- "Did anyone call this evening?"
- "Mr. Hallward, sir. He stayed here till eleven, and then he went away to
- catch his train."
- "Oh! I am sorry I didn't see him. Did he leave any message?"
- "No, sir, except that he would write to you from Paris, if he did not
- find you at the club."
- "That will do, Francis. Don't forget to call me at nine to-morrow."
- "No, sir."
- The man shambled down the passage in his slippers.
- Dorian Gray threw his hat and coat upon the table, and passed into the
- library. For a quarter of an hour he walked up and down the room biting
- his lip, and thinking. Then he took down the Blue Book from one of the
- shelves, and began to turn over the leaves. "Alan Campbell, 152,
- Hertford Street, Mayfair." Yes; that was the man he wanted.
- CHAPTER XIV
- At nine o'clock the next morning his servant came in with a cup of
- chocolate on a tray, and opened the shutters. Dorian was sleeping quite
- peacefully, lying on his right side, with one hand underneath his cheek.
- He looked like a boy who had been tired out with play, or study.
- The man had to touch him twice on the shoulder before he woke, and as he
- opened his eyes a faint smile passed across his lips, as though he had
- been lost in some delightful dream. Yet he had not dreamed at all. His
- night had been untroubled by any images of pleasure or of pain. But
- youth smiles without any reason. It is one of its chiefest charms.
- He turned round, and, leaning upon his elbow, began to sip his
- chocolate. The mellow November sun came streaming into the room. The sky
- was bright, and there was a genial warmth in the air. It was almost like
- a morning in May.
- Gradually the events of the preceding night crept with silent
- blood-stained feet into his brain, and reconstructed themselves there
- with terrible distinctness. He winced at the memory of all that he had
- suffered, and for a moment the same curious feeling of loathing for
- Basil Hallward that had made him kill him as he sat in the chair, came
- back to him, and he grew cold with passion. The dead man was still
- sitting there, too, and in the sunlight now. How horrible that was! Such
- hideous things were for the darkness, not for the day.
- He felt that if he brooded on what he had gone through he would sicken
- or grow mad. There were sins whose fascination was more in the memory
- than in the doing of them; strange triumphs that gratified the pride
- more than the passions, and gave to the intellect a quickened sense of
- joy, greater than any joy they brought, or could ever bring, to the
- senses. But this was not one of them. It was a thing to be driven out of
- the mind, to be drugged with poppies, to be strangled lest it might
- strangle one itself.
- When the half-hour struck, he passed his hand across his forehead, and
- then got up hastily, and dressed himself with even more than his usual
- care, giving a good deal of attention to the choice of his necktie and
- scarf-pin, and changing his rings more than once. He spent a long time
- also over breakfast, tasting the various dishes, talking to his valet
- about some new liveries that he was thinking of getting made for the
- servants at Selby, and going through his correspondence. At some of the
- letters he smiled. Three of them bored him. One he read several times
- over, and then tore up with a slight look of annoyance in his face.
- "That awful thing, a woman's memory!" as Lord Henry had once said.
- After he had drunk his cup of black coffee, he wiped his lips slowly
- with a napkin, motioned to his servant to wait, and going over to the
- table sat down and wrote two letters. One he put in his pocket, the
- other he handed to the valet.
- "Take this round to 152, Hertford Street, Francis, and if Mr. Campbell
- is out of town, get his address."
- As soon as he was alone, he lit a cigarette, and began sketching upon a
- piece of paper, drawing first flowers, and bits of architecture, and
- then human faces. Suddenly he remarked that every face that he drew
- seemed to have a fantastic likeness to Basil Hallward. He frowned, and,
- getting up, went over to the bookcase and took out a volume at hazard.
- He was determined that he would not think about what had happened until
- it became absolutely necessary that he should do so.
- When he had stretched himself on the sofa, he looked at the title-page
- of the book. It was Gautier's "Émaux et Camées," Charpentier's
- Japanese-paper edition, with the Jacquemart etching. The binding was of
- citron-green leather, with a design of gilt trellis-work and dotted
- pomegranates. It had been given to him by Adrian Singleton. As he turned
- over the pages his eye fell on the poem about the hand of Lacenaire, the
- cold yellow hand "_du supplice encore mal lavée_," with its downy red
- hairs and its "_doigts de faune_." He glanced at his own white taper
- fingers, shuddering slightly in spite of himself, and passed on, till he
- came to those lovely stanzas upon Venice:--
- "Sur une gamme chromatique,
- Le sein de perles ruisselant,
- La Vénus de l'Adriatique
- Sort de l'eau son corps rose et blanc.
- "Les dômes, sur l'azur des ondes
- Suivant la phrase au pur contour,
- S'enflent comme des gorges rondes
- Que soulève un soupir d'amour.
- "L'esquif aborde et me dépose,
- Jetant son amarre au pilier,
- Devant une façade rose,
- Sur le marbre d'un escalier."
- How exquisite they were! As one read them, one seemed to be floating
- down the green water-ways of the pink and pearl city, seated in a black
- gondola with silver prow and trailing curtains. The mere lines looked to
- him like those straight lines of turquoise-blue that follow one as one
- pushes out to the Lido. The sudden flashes of colour reminded him of the
- gleam of the opal-and-iris-throated birds that flutter round the tall
- honey-combed Campanile, or stalk, with such stately grace, through the
- dim, dust-stained arcades. Leaning back with half-closed eyes, he kept
- saying over and over to himself:--
- "Devant une façade rose,
- Sur le marbre d'un escalier."
- The whole of Venice was in those two lines. He remembered the autumn
- that he had passed there, and a wonderful love that had stirred him to
- mad, delightful follies. There was romance in every place. But Venice,
- like Oxford, had kept the background for romance, and, to the true
- romantic, background was everything, or almost everything. Basil had
- been with him part of the time, and had gone wild over Tintoret. Poor
- Basil! what a horrible way for a man to die!
- He sighed, and took up the volume again, and tried to forget. He read of
- the swallows that fly in and out of the little café at Smyrna where the
- Hadjis sit counting their amber beads and the turbaned merchants smoke
- their long tasselled pipes and talk gravely to each other; he read of
- the Obelisk in the Place de la Concorde that weeps tears of granite in
- its lonely sunless exile, and longs to be back by the hot lotus-covered
- Nile, where there are Sphinxes, and rose-red ibises, and white vultures
- with gilded claws, and crocodiles, with small beryl eyes, that crawl
- over the green steaming mud; he began to brood over those verses which,
- drawing music from kiss-stained marble, tell of that curious statue that
- Gautier compares to a contralto voice, the "_monstre charmant_" that
- couches in the porphyry-room of the Louvre. But after a time the book
- fell from his hand. He grew nervous, and a horrible fit of terror came
- over him. What if Alan Campbell should be out of England? Days would
- elapse before he could come back. Perhaps he might refuse to come. What
- could he do then? Every moment was of vital importance. They had been
- great friends once, five years before--almost inseparable, indeed. Then
- the intimacy had come suddenly to an end. When they met in society now,
- it was only Dorian Gray who smiled; Alan Campbell never did.
- He was an extremely clever young man, though he had no real appreciation
- of the visible arts, and whatever little sense of the beauty of poetry
- he possessed he had gained entirely from Dorian. His dominant
- intellectual passion was for science. At Cambridge he had spent a great
- deal of his time working in the Laboratory, and had taken a good class
- in the Natural Science Tripos of his year. Indeed, he was still devoted
- to the study of chemistry, and had a laboratory of his own, in which he
- used to shut himself up all day long, greatly to the annoyance of his
- mother, who had set her heart on his standing for Parliament, and had a
- vague idea that a chemist was a person who made up prescriptions. He was
- an excellent musician, however, as well, and played both the violin and
- the piano better than most amateurs. In fact, it was music that had
- first brought him and Dorian Gray together--music and that indefinable
- attraction that Dorian seemed to be able to exercise whenever he wished,
- and indeed exercised often without being conscious of it. They had met
- at Lady Berkshire's the night that Rubinstein played there, and after
- that used to be always seen together at the Opera, and wherever good
- music was going on. For eighteen months their intimacy lasted. Campbell
- was always either at Selby Royal or in Grosvenor Square. To him, as to
- many others, Dorian Gray was the type of everything that is wonderful
- and fascinating in life. Whether or not a quarrel had taken place
- between them no one ever knew. But suddenly people remarked that they
- scarcely spoke when they met, and that Campbell seemed always to go away
- early from any party at which Dorian Gray was present. He had changed,
- too--was strangely melancholy at times, appeared almost to dislike
- hearing music, and would never himself play, giving as his excuse, when
- he was called upon, that he was so absorbed in science that he had no
- time left in which to practise. And this was certainly true. Every day
- he seemed to become more interested in biology, and his name appeared
- once or twice in some of the scientific reviews, in connection with
- certain curious experiments.
- This was the man Dorian Gray was waiting for. Every second he kept
- glancing at the clock. As the minutes went by he became horribly
- agitated. At last he got up, and began to pace up and down the room,
- looking like a beautiful caged thing. He took long stealthy strides. His
- hands were curiously cold.
- The suspense became unbearable. Time seemed to him to be crawling with
- feet of lead, while he by monstrous winds was being swept towards the
- jagged edge of some black cleft of precipice. He knew what was waiting
- for him there; saw it indeed, and, shuddering, crushed with dank hands
- his burning lids as though he would have robbed the very brain of sight,
- and driven the eyeballs back into their cave. It was useless. The brain
- had its own food on which it battened, and the imagination, made
- grotesque by terror, twisted and distorted as a living thing by pain,
- danced like some foul puppet on a stand, and grinned through moving
- masks. Then, suddenly, Time stopped for him. Yes: that blind,
- slow-breathing thing crawled no more, and horrible thoughts, Time being
- dead, raced nimbly on in front, and dragged a hideous future from its
- grave, and showed it to him. He stared at it. Its very horror made him
- stone.
- At last the door opened, and his servant entered. He turned glazed eyes
- upon him.
- "Mr. Campbell, sir," said the man.
- A sigh of relief broke from his parched lips, and the colour came back
- to his cheeks.
- "Ask him to come in at once, Francis." He felt that he was himself
- again. His mood of cowardice had passed away.
- The man bowed, and retired. In a few moments Alan Campbell walked in,
- looking very stern and rather pale, his pallor being intensified by his
- coal-black hair and dark eyebrows.
- "Alan! this is kind of you. I thank you for coming."
- "I had intended never to enter your house again, Gray. But you said it
- was a matter of life and death." His voice was hard and cold. He spoke
- with slow deliberation. There was a look of contempt in the steady
- searching gaze that he turned on Dorian. He kept his hands in the
- pockets of his Astrakhan coat, and seemed not to have noticed the
- gesture with which he had been greeted.
- "Yes: it is a matter of life and death, Alan, and to more than one
- person. Sit down."
- Campbell took a chair by the table, and Dorian sat opposite to him. The
- two men's eyes met. In Dorian's there was infinite pity. He knew that
- what he was going to do was dreadful.
- After a strained moment of silence, he leaned across and said, very
- quietly, but watching the effect of each word upon the face of him he
- had sent for, "Alan, in a locked room at the top of this house, a room
- to which nobody but myself has access, a dead man is seated at a table.
- He has been dead ten hours now. Don't stir, and don't look at me like
- that. Who the man is, why he died, how he died, are matters that do not
- concern you. What you have to do is this----"
- "Stop, Gray. I don't want to know anything further. Whether what you
- have told me is true or not true, doesn't concern me. I entirely decline
- to be mixed up in your life. Keep your horrible secrets to yourself.
- They don't interest me any more."
- "Alan, they will have to interest you. This one will have to interest
- you. I am awfully sorry for you, Alan. But I can't help myself. You are
- the one man who is able to save me. I am forced to bring you into the
- matter. I have no option. Alan, you are scientific. You know about
- chemistry, and things of that kind. You have made experiments. What you
- have got to do is to destroy the thing that is upstairs--to destroy it
- so that not a vestige of it will be left. Nobody saw this person come
- into the house. Indeed, at the present moment he is supposed to be in
- Paris. He will not be missed for months. When he is missed, there must
- be no trace of him found here. You, Alan, you must change him, and
- everything that belongs to him, into a handful of ashes that I may
- scatter in the air."
- "You are mad, Dorian."
- "Ah! I was waiting for you to call me Dorian."
- "You are mad, I tell you--mad to imagine that I would raise a finger to
- help you, mad to make this monstrous confession. I will have nothing to
- do with this matter, whatever it is. Do you think I am going to peril my
- reputation for you? What is it to me what devil's work you are up to?"
- "It was suicide, Alan."
- "I am glad of that. But who drove him to it? You, I should fancy."
- "Do you still refuse to do this for me?"
- "Of course I refuse. I will have absolutely nothing to do with it. I
- don't care what shame comes on you. You deserve it all. I should not be
- sorry to see you disgraced, publicly disgraced. How dare you ask me, of
- all men in the world, to mix myself up in this horror? I should have
- thought you knew more about people's characters. Your friend Lord Henry
- Wotton can't have taught you much about psychology, whatever else he has
- taught you. Nothing will induce me to stir a step to help you. You have
- come to the wrong man. Go to some of your friends. Don't come to me."
- "Alan, it was murder. I killed him. You don't know what he had made me
- suffer. Whatever my life is, he had more to do with the making or the
- marring of it than poor Harry has had. He may not have intended it, the
- result was the same."
- "Murder! Good God, Dorian, is that what you have come to? I shall not
- inform upon you. It is not my business. Besides, without my stirring in
- the matter, you are certain to be arrested. Nobody ever commits a crime
- without doing something stupid. But I will have nothing to do with it."
- "You must have something to do with it. Wait, wait a moment; listen to
- me. Only listen, Alan. All I ask of you is to perform a certain
- scientific experiment. You go to hospitals and dead-houses, and the
- horrors that you do there don't affect you. If in some hideous
- dissecting-room or fetid laboratory you found this man lying on a leaden
- table with red gutters scooped out in it for the blood to flow through,
- you would simply look upon him as an admirable subject. You would not
- turn a hair. You would not believe that you were doing anything wrong.
- On the contrary, you would probably feel that you were benefiting the
- human race, or increasing the sum of knowledge in the world, or
- gratifying intellectual curiosity, or something of that kind. What I
- want you to do is merely what you have often done before. Indeed, to
- destroy a body must be far less horrible than what you are accustomed to
- work at. And, remember, it is the only piece of evidence against me. If
- it is discovered, I am lost; and it is sure to be discovered unless you
- help me."
- "I have no desire to help you. You forget that. I am simply indifferent
- to the whole thing. It has nothing to do with me."
- "Alan, I entreat you. Think of the position I am in. Just before you
- came I almost fainted with terror. You may know terror yourself some
- day. No! don't think of that. Look at the matter purely from the
- scientific point of view. You don't inquire where the dead things on
- which you experiment come from. Don't inquire now. I have told you too
- much as it is. But I beg of you to do this. We were friends once, Alan."
- "Don't speak about those days, Dorian: they are dead."
- "The dead linger sometimes. The man upstairs will not go away. He is
- sitting at the table with bowed head and outstretched arms. Alan! Alan!
- if you don't come to my assistance I am ruined. Why, they will hang me,
- Alan! Don't you understand? They will hang me for what I have done."
- "There is no good in prolonging this scene. I absolutely refuse to do
- anything in the matter. It is insane of you to ask me."
- "You refuse?"
- "Yes."
- "I entreat you, Alan."
- "It is useless."
- The same look of pity came into Dorian Gray's eyes. Then he stretched
- out his hand, took a piece of paper, and wrote something on it. He read
- it over twice, folded it carefully, and pushed it across the table.
- Having done this, he got up, and went over to the window.
- Campbell looked at him in surprise, and then took up the paper, and
- opened it. As he read it, his face became ghastly pale, and he fell back
- in his chair. A horrible sense of sickness came over him. He felt as if
- his heart was beating itself to death in some empty hollow.
- After two or three minutes of terrible silence, Dorian turned round, and
- came and stood behind him, putting his hand upon his shoulder.
- "I am so sorry for you, Alan," he murmured, "but you leave me no
- alternative. I have a letter written already. Here it is. You see the
- address. If you don't help me, I must send it. If you don't help me, I
- will send it. You know what the result will be. But you are going to
- help me. It is impossible for you to refuse now. I tried to spare you.
- You will do me the justice to admit that. You were stern, harsh,
- offensive. You treated me as no man has ever dared to treat me--no
- living man, at any rate. I bore it all. Now it is for me to dictate
- terms."
- Campbell buried his face in his hands, and a shudder passed through him.
- "Yes, it is my turn to dictate terms, Alan. You know what they are. The
- thing is quite simple. Come, don't work yourself into this fever. The
- thing has to be done. Face it, and do it."
- A groan broke from Campbell's lips, and he shivered all over. The
- ticking of the clock on the mantelpiece seemed to him to be dividing
- Time into separate atoms of agony, each of which was too terrible to be
- borne. He felt as if an iron ring was being slowly tightened round his
- forehead, as if the disgrace with which he was threatened had already
- come upon him. The hand upon his shoulder weighed like a hand of lead.
- It was intolerable. It seemed to crush him.
- "Come, Alan, you must decide at once."
- "I cannot do it," he said, mechanically, as though words could alter
- things.
- "You must. You have no choice. Don't delay."
- He hesitated a moment. "Is there a fire in the room upstairs?"
- "Yes, there is a gas-fire with asbestos."
- "I shall have to go home and get some things from the laboratory."
- "No, Alan, you must not leave the house. Write out on a sheet of
- note-paper what you want, and my servant will take a cab and bring the
- things back to you."
- Campbell scrawled a few lines, blotted them, and addressed an envelope
- to his assistant. Dorian took the note up and read it carefully. Then he
- rang the bell, and gave it to his valet, with orders to return as soon
- as possible, and to bring the things with him.
- As the hall door shut, Campbell started nervously, and, having got up
- from the chair, went over to the chimney-piece. He was shivering with a
- kind of ague. For nearly twenty minutes, neither of the men spoke. A fly
- buzzed noisily about the room, and the ticking of the clock was like the
- beat of a hammer.
- As the chime struck one, Campbell turned round, and, looking at Dorian
- Gray, saw that his eyes were filled with tears. There was something in
- the purity and refinement of that sad face that seemed to enrage him.
- "You are infamous, absolutely infamous!" he muttered.
- "Hush, Alan: you have saved my life," said Dorian.
- "Your life? Good heavens! what a life that is! You have gone from
- corruption to corruption, and now you have culminated in crime. In doing
- what I am going to do, what you force me to do, it is not of your life
- that I am thinking."
- "Ah, Alan," murmured Dorian, with a sigh, "I wish you had a thousandth
- part of the pity for me that I have for you." He turned away as he
- spoke, and stood looking out at the garden. Campbell made no answer.
- After about ten minutes a knock came to the door, and the servant
- entered, carrying a large mahogany chest of chemicals, with a long coil
- of steel and platinum wire and two rather curiously-shaped iron clamps.
- "Shall I leave the things here, sir?" he asked Campbell.
- "Yes," said Dorian. "And I am afraid, Francis, that I have another
- errand for you. What is the name of the man at Richmond who supplies
- Selby with orchids?"
- "Harden, sir."
- "Yes--Harden. You must go down to Richmond at once, see Harden
- personally, and tell him to send twice as many orchids as I ordered, and
- to have as few white ones as possible. In fact, I don't want any white
- ones. It is a lovely day, Francis, and Richmond is a very pretty place,
- otherwise I wouldn't bother you about it."
- "No trouble, sir. At what time shall I be back?"
- Dorian looked at Campbell. "How long will your experiment take, Alan?"
- he said, in a calm, indifferent voice. The presence of a third person in
- the room seemed to give him extraordinary courage.
- Campbell frowned, and bit his lip. "It will take about five hours," he
- answered.
- "It will be time enough, then, if you are back at half-past seven,
- Francis. Or stay: just leave my things out for dressing. You can have
- the evening to yourself. I am not dining at home, so I shall not want
- you."
- "Thank you, sir," said the man, leaving the room.
- "Now, Alan, there is not a moment to be lost. How heavy this chest is!
- I'll take it for you. You bring the other things." He spoke rapidly, and
- in an authoritative manner. Campbell felt dominated by him. They left
- the room together.
- When they reached the top landing, Dorian took out the key and turned it
- in the lock. Then he stopped, and a troubled look came into his eyes. He
- shuddered. "I don't think I can go in, Alan," he murmured.
- "It is nothing to me. I don't require you," said Campbell, coldly.
- Dorian half opened the door. As he did so, he saw the face of his
- portrait leering in the sunlight. On the floor in front of it the torn
- curtain was lying. He remembered that, the night before he had
- forgotten, for the first time in his life, to hide the fatal canvas, and
- was about to rush forward, when he drew back with a shudder.
- What was that loathsome red dew that gleamed, wet and glistening, on one
- of the hands, as though the canvas had sweated blood? How horrible it
- was!--more horrible, it seemed to him for the moment, than the silent
- thing that he knew was stretched across the table, the thing whose
- grotesque misshapen shadow on the spotted carpet showed him that it had
- not stirred, but was still there, as he had left it.
- He heaved a deep breath, opened the door a little wider, and with
- half-closed eyes and averted head walked quickly in, determined that he
- would not look even once upon the dead man. Then, stooping down, and
- taking up the gold and purple hanging, he flung it right over the
- picture.
- There he stopped, feeling afraid to turn round, and his eyes fixed
- themselves on the intricacies of the pattern before him. He heard
- Campbell bringing in the heavy chest, and the irons, and the other
- things that he had required for his dreadful work. He began to wonder if
- he and Basil Hallward had ever met, and, if so, what they had thought of
- each other.
- "Leave me now," said a stern voice behind him.
- He turned and hurried out, just conscious that the dead man had been
- thrust back into the chair, and that Campbell was gazing into a
- glistening yellow face. As he was going downstairs he heard the key
- being turned in the lock.
- It was long after seven when Campbell came back into the library. He was
- pale, but absolutely calm. "I have done what you asked me to do," he
- muttered. "And now, good-bye. Let us never see each other again."
- "You have saved me from ruin, Alan. I cannot forget that," said Dorian,
- simply.
- As soon as Campbell had left, he went upstairs. There was a horrible
- smell of nitric acid in the room. But the thing that had been sitting at
- the table was gone.
- CHAPTER XV
- That evening, at eight-thirty, exquisitely dressed and wearing a large
- buttonhole of Parma violets, Dorian Gray was ushered into Lady
- Narborough's drawing-room by bowing servants. His forehead was throbbing
- with maddened nerves, and he felt wildly excited, but his manner as he
- bent over his hostess's hand was as easy and graceful as ever. Perhaps
- one never seems so much at one's ease as when one has to play a part.
- Certainly no one looking at Dorian Gray that night could have believed
- that he had passed through a tragedy as horrible as any tragedy of our
- age. Those finely-shaped fingers could never have clutched a knife for
- sin, nor those smiling lips have cried out on God and goodness. He
- himself could not help wondering at the calm of his demeanour, and for a
- moment felt keenly the terrible pleasure of a double life.
- It was a small party, got up rather in a hurry by Lady Narborough, who
- was a very clever woman, with what Lord Henry used to describe as the
- remains of really remarkable ugliness. She had proved an excellent wife
- to one of our most tedious ambassadors, and having buried her husband
- properly in a marble mausoleum, which she had herself designed, and
- married off her daughters to some rich, rather elderly men, she devoted
- herself now to the pleasures of French fiction, French cookery, and
- French _esprit_ when she could get it.
- Dorian was one of her special favourites, and she always told him that
- she was extremely glad she had not met him in early life. "I know, my
- dear, I should have fallen madly in love with you," she used to say,
- "and thrown my bonnet right over the mills for your sake. It is most
- fortunate that you were not thought of at the time. As it was, our
- bonnets were so unbecoming, and the mills were so occupied in trying to
- raise the wind, that I never had even a flirtation with anybody.
- However, that was all Narborough's fault. He was dreadfully
- short-sighted, and there is no pleasure in taking in a husband who never
- sees anything."
- Her guests this evening were rather tedious. The fact was, as she
- explained to Dorian, behind a very shabby fan, one of her married
- daughters had come up quite suddenly to stay with her, and, to make
- matters worse, had actually brought her husband with her. "I think it is
- most unkind of her, my dear," she whispered. "Of course I go and stay
- with them every summer after I come from Homburg, but then an old woman
- like me must have fresh air sometimes, and besides, I really wake them
- up. You don't know what an existence they lead down there. It is pure
- unadulterated country life. They get up early, because they have so much
- to do, and go to bed early because they have so little to think about.
- There has not been a scandal in the neighbourhood since the time of
- Queen Elizabeth, and consequently they all fall asleep after dinner. You
- shan't sit next either of them. You shall sit by me, and amuse me."
- Dorian murmured a graceful compliment, and looked round the room. Yes:
- it was certainly a tedious party. Two of the people he had never seen
- before, and the others consisted of Ernest Harrowden, one of those
- middle-aged mediocrities so common in London clubs who have no enemies,
- but are thoroughly disliked by their friends; Lady Ruxton, an
- over-dressed woman of forty-seven, with a hooked nose, who was always
- trying to get herself compromised, but was so peculiarly plain that to
- her great disappointment no one would ever believe anything against
- her; Mrs. Erlynne, a pushing nobody, with a delightful lisp, and
- Venetian-red hair; Lady Alice Chapman, his hostess's daughter, a dowdy
- dull girl, with one of those characteristic British faces, that, once
- seen, are never remembered; and her husband, a red-cheeked,
- white-whiskered creature who, like so many of his class, was under the
- impression that inordinate joviality can atone for an entire lack of
- ideas.
- He was rather sorry he had come, till Lady Narborough, looking at the
- great ormolu gilt clock that sprawled in gaudy curves on the
- mauve-draped mantel-shelf, exclaimed: "How horrid of Henry Wotton to be
- so late! I sent round to him this morning on chance, and he promised
- faithfully not to disappoint me."
- It was some consolation that Harry was to be there, and when the door
- opened and he heard his slow musical voice lending charm to some
- insincere apology, he ceased to feel bored.
- But at dinner he could not eat anything. Plate after plate went away
- untasted. Lady Narborough kept scolding him for what she called "an
- insult to poor Adolphe, who invented the _menu_ specially for you," and
- now and then Lord Henry looked across at him, wondering at his silence
- and abstracted manner. From time to time the butler filled his glass
- with champagne. He drank eagerly, and his thirst seemed to increase.
- "Dorian," said Lord Henry, at last, as the _chaud-froid_ was being
- handed round, "what is the matter with you to-night? You are quite out
- of sorts."
- "I believe he is in love," cried Lady Narborough, "and that he is afraid
- to tell me for fear I should be jealous. He is quite right. I certainly
- should."
- "Dear Lady Narborough," murmured Dorian, smiling, "I have not been in
- love for a whole week--not, in fact, since Madame de Ferrol left town."
- "How you men can fall in love with that woman!" exclaimed the old lady.
- "I really cannot understand it."
- "It is simply because she remembers you when you were a little girl,
- Lady Narborough," said Lord Henry. "She is the one link between us and
- your short frocks."
- "She does not remember my short frocks at all, Lord Henry. But I
- remember her very well at Vienna thirty years ago, and how _décolletée_
- she was then."
- "She is still _décolletée_," he answered, taking an olive in his long
- fingers; "and when she is in a very smart gown she looks like an
- _édition de luxe_ of a bad French novel. She is really wonderful, and
- full of surprises. Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary.
- When her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief."
- "How can you, Harry!" cried Dorian.
- "It is a most romantic explanation," laughed the hostess. "But her third
- husband, Lord Henry! You don't mean to say Ferrol is the fourth."
- "Certainly, Lady Narborough."
- "I don't believe a word of it."
- "Well, ask Mr. Gray. He is one of her most intimate friends."
- "Is it true, Mr. Gray?"
- "She assures me so, Lady Narborough," said Dorian. "I asked her whether,
- like Marguerite de Navarre, she had their hearts embalmed and hung at
- her girdle. She told me she didn't, because none of them had had any
- hearts at all."
- "Four husbands! Upon my word that is _trop de zèle_."
- "_Trop d'audace_, I tell her," said Dorian.
- "Oh! she is audacious enough for anything, my dear. And what is Ferrol
- like? I don't know him."
- "The husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes,"
- said Lord Henry, sipping his wine.
- Lady Narborough hit him with her fan. "Lord Henry, I am not at all
- surprised that the world says that you are extremely wicked."
- "But what world says that?" asked Lord Henry, elevating his eyebrows.
- "It can only be the next world. This world and I are on excellent
- terms."
- "Everybody I know says you are very wicked," cried the old lady, shaking
- her head.
- Lord Henry looked serious for some moments. "It is perfectly monstrous,"
- he said, at last, "the way people go about nowadays saying things
- against one behind one's back that are absolutely and entirely true."
- "Isn't he incorrigible?" cried Dorian, leaning forward in his chair.
- "I hope so," said his hostess, laughing. "But really if you all worship
- Madame de Ferrol in this ridiculous way, I shall have to marry again so
- as to be in the fashion."
- "You will never marry again, Lady Narborough," broke in Lord Henry. "You
- were far too happy. When a woman marries again it is because she
- detested her first husband. When a man marries again, it is because he
- adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs."
- "Narborough wasn't perfect," cried the old lady.
- "If he had been, you would not have loved him, my dear lady," was the
- rejoinder. "Women love us for our defects. If we have enough of them
- they will forgive us everything, even our intellects. You will never ask
- me to dinner again, after saying this, I am afraid, Lady Narborough; but
- it is quite true."
- "Of course it is true, Lord Henry. If we women did not love you for your
- defects, where would you all be? Not one of you would ever be married.
- You would be a set of unfortunate bachelors. Not, however, that that
- would alter you much. Nowadays all the married men live like bachelors,
- and all the bachelors like married men."
- "_Fin de siècle_," murmured Lord Henry.
- "_Fin du globe_," answered his hostess.
- "I wish it were _fin du globe_," said Dorian, with a sigh. "Life is a
- great disappointment."
- "Ah, my dear," cried Lady Narborough, putting on her gloves, "don't tell
- me that you have exhausted Life. When a man says that one knows that
- Life has exhausted him. Lord Henry is very wicked, and I sometimes wish
- that I had been; but you are made to be good--you look so good. I must
- find you a nice wife. Lord Henry, don't you think that Mr. Gray should
- get married?"
- "I am always telling him so, Lady Narborough," said Lord Henry, with a
- bow.
- "Well, we must look out for a suitable match for him. I shall go through
- Debrett carefully to-night, and draw out a list of all the eligible
- young ladies."
- "With their ages, Lady Narborough?" asked Dorian.
- "Of course, with their ages, slightly edited. But nothing must be done
- in a hurry. I want it to be what _The Morning Post_ calls a suitable
- alliance, and I want you both to be happy."
- "What nonsense people talk about happy marriages!" exclaimed Lord Henry.
- "A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her."
- "Ah! what a cynic you are!" cried the old lady, pushing back her chair,
- and nodding to Lady Ruxton. "You must come and dine with me soon again.
- You are really an admirable tonic, much better than what Sir Andrew
- prescribes for me. You must tell me what people you would like to meet,
- though. I want it to be a delightful gathering."
- "I like men who have a future, and women who have a past," he answered.
- "Or do you think that would make it a petticoat party?"
- "I fear so," she said, laughing, as she stood up. "A thousand pardons,
- my dear Lady Ruxton," she added. "I didn't see you hadn't finished your
- cigarette."
- "Never mind, Lady Narborough. I smoke a great deal too much. I am going
- to limit myself, for the future."
- "Pray don't, Lady Ruxton," said Lord Henry. "Moderation is a fatal
- thing. Enough is as bad as a meal. More than enough is as good as a
- feast."
- Lady Ruxton glanced at him curiously. "You must come and explain that to
- me some afternoon, Lord Henry. It sounds a fascinating theory," she
- murmured, as she swept out of the room.
- "Now, mind you don't stay too long over your politics and scandal,"
- cried Lady Narborough from the door. "If you do, we are sure to squabble
- upstairs."
- The men laughed, and Mr. Chapman got up solemnly from the foot of the
- table and came up to the top. Dorian Gray changed his seat, and went and
- sat by Lord Henry. Mr. Chapman began to talk in a loud voice about the
- situation in the House of Commons. He guffawed at his adversaries. The
- word _doctrinaire_--word full of terror to the British mind--reappeared
- from time to time between his explosions. An alliterative prefix served
- as an ornament of oratory. He hoisted the Union Jack on the pinnacles of
- Thought. The inherited stupidity of the race--sound English common sense
- he jovially termed it--was shown to be the proper bulwark for Society.
- A smile curved Lord Henry's lips, and he turned round and looked at
- Dorian.
- "Are you better, my dear fellow?" he asked. "You seemed rather out of
- sorts at dinner."
- "I am quite well, Harry. I am tired. That is all."
- "You were charming last night. The little Duchess is quite devoted to
- you. She tells me she is going down to Selby."
- "She has promised to come on the twentieth."
- "Is Monmouth to be there too?"
- "Oh, yes, Harry."
- "He bores me dreadfully, almost as much as he bores her. She is very
- clever, too clever for a woman. She lacks the indefinable charm of
- weakness. It is the feet of clay that makes the gold of the image
- precious. Her feet are very pretty, but they are not feet of clay. White
- porcelain feet, if you like. They have been through the fire, and what
- fire does not destroy, it hardens. She has had experiences."
- "How long has she been married?" asked Dorian.
- "An eternity, she tells me. I believe, according to the peerage, it is
- ten years, but ten years with Monmouth must have been like eternity,
- with time thrown in. Who else is coming?"
- "Oh, the Willoughbys, Lord Rugby and his wife, our hostess, Geoffrey
- Clouston, the usual set. I have asked Lord Grotrian."
- "I like him," said Lord Henry. "A great many people don't, but I find
- him charming. He atones for being occasionally somewhat over-dressed, by
- being always absolutely over-educated. He is a very modern type."
- "I don't know if he will be able to come, Harry. He may have to go to
- Monte Carlo with his father."
- "Ah! what a nuisance people's people are! Try and make him come. By the
- way, Dorian, you ran off very early last night. You left before eleven.
- What did you do afterwards? Did you go straight home?"
- Dorian glanced at him hurriedly, and frowned. "No, Harry," he said at
- last, "I did not get home till nearly three."
- "Did you go to the club?"
- "Yes," he answered. Then he bit his lip. "No, I don't mean that. I
- didn't go to the club. I walked about. I forget what I did.... How
- inquisitive you are, Harry! You always want to know what one has been
- doing. I always want to forget what I have been doing. I came in at
- half-past two, if you wish to know the exact time. I had left my
- latch-key at home, and my servant had to let me in. If you want any
- corroborative evidence on the subject you can ask him."
- Lord Henry shrugged his shoulders. "My dear fellow, as if I cared! Let
- us go up to the drawing-room. No sherry, thank you, Mr. Chapman.
- Something has happened to you, Dorian. Tell me what it is. You are not
- yourself to-night."
- "Don't mind me, Harry. I am irritable, and out of temper. I shall come
- round and see you to-morrow or next day. Make my excuses to Lady
- Narborough. I shan't go upstairs. I shall go home. I must go home."
- "All right, Dorian. I daresay I shall see you to-morrow at tea-time. The
- Duchess is coming."
- "I will try to be there, Harry," he said, leaving the room. As he drove
- back to his own house he was conscious that the sense of terror he
- thought he had strangled had come back to him. Lord Henry's casual
- questioning had made him lose his nerves for the moment, and he wanted
- his nerve still. Things that were dangerous had to be destroyed. He
- winced. He hated the idea of even touching them.
- Yet it had to be done. He realised that, and when he had locked the door
- of his library, he opened the secret press into which he had thrust
- Basil Hallward's coat and bag. A huge fire was blazing. He piled another
- log on it. The smell of the singeing clothes and burning leather was
- horrible. It took him three-quarters of an hour to consume everything.
- At the end he felt faint and sick, and having lit some Algerian
- pastilles in a pierced copper brazier, he bathed his hands and forehead
- with a cool musk-scented vinegar.
- Suddenly he started. His eyes grew strangely bright, and he gnawed
- nervously at his under-lip. Between two of the windows stood a large
- Florentine cabinet, made out of ebony, and inlaid with ivory and blue
- lapis. He watched it as though it were a thing that could fascinate and
- make afraid, as though it held something that he longed for and yet
- almost loathed. His breath quickened. A mad craving came over him. He
- lit a cigarette and then threw it away. His eyelids drooped till the
- long fringed lashes almost touched his cheek. But he still watched the
- cabinet. At last he got up from the sofa on which he had been lying,
- went over to it, and, having unlocked it, touched some hidden spring. A
- triangular drawer passed slowly out. His fingers moved instinctively
- towards it, dipped in, and closed on something. It was a small Chinese
- box of black and gold-dust lacquer, elaborately wrought, the sides
- patterned with curved waves, and the silken cords hung with round
- crystals and tasselled in plaited metal threads. He opened it. Inside
- was a green paste, waxy in lustre, the odour curiously heavy and
- persistent.
- He hesitated for some moments, with a strangely immobile smile upon his
- face. Then shivering, though the atmosphere of the room was terribly
- hot, he drew himself up, and glanced at the clock. It was twenty minutes
- to twelve. He put the box back, shutting the cabinet doors as he did so,
- and went into his bedroom.
- As midnight was striking bronze blows upon the dusky air, Dorian Gray
- dressed commonly, and with a muffler wrapped round his throat, crept
- quietly out of the house. In Bond Street he found a hansom with a good
- horse. He hailed it, and in a low voice gave the driver an address.
- The man shook his head. "It is too far for me," he muttered.
- "Here is a sovereign for you," said Dorian. "You shall have another if
- you drive fast."
- "All right, sir," answered the man, "you will be there in an hour," and
- after his fare had got in he turned his horse round, and drove rapidly
- towards the river.
- CHAPTER XVI
- A cold rain began to fall, and the blurred street-lamps looked ghastly
- in the dripping mist. The public-houses were just closing, and dim men
- and women were clustering in broken groups round their doors. From some
- of the bars came the sound of horrible laughter. In others, drunkards
- brawled and screamed.
- Lying back in the hansom, with his hat pulled over his forehead, Dorian
- Gray watched with listless eyes the sordid shame of the great city, and
- now and then he repeated to himself the words that Lord Henry had said
- to him on the first day they had met, "To cure the soul by means of the
- senses, and the senses by means of the soul." Yes, that was the secret.
- He had often tried it, and would try it again now. There were
- opium-dens, where one could buy oblivion, dens of horror where the
- memory of old sins could be destroyed by the madness of sins that were
- new.
- The moon hung low in the sky like a yellow skull. From time to time a
- huge misshapen cloud stretched a long arm across and hid it. The
- gas-lamps grew fewer, and the streets more narrow and gloomy. Once the
- man lost his way, and had to drive back half a mile. A steam rose from
- the horse as it splashed up the puddles. The side-windows of the hansom
- were clogged with a grey-flannel mist.
- "To cure the soul by means of the senses, and the senses by means of the
- soul!" How the words rang in his ears! His soul, certainly, was sick to
- death. Was it true that the senses could cure it? Innocent blood had
- been spilt. What could atone for that? Ah! for that there was no
- atonement; but though forgiveness was impossible, forgetfulness was
- possible still, and he was determined to forget, to stamp the thing out,
- to crush it as one would crush the adder that had stung one. Indeed,
- what right had Basil to have spoken to him as he had done? Who had made
- him a Judge over others? He had said things that were dreadful,
- horrible, not to be endured.
- On and on plodded the hansom, going slower, it seemed to him, at each
- step. He thrust up the trap, and called to the man to drive faster. The
- hideous hunger for opium began to gnaw at him. His throat burned, and
- his delicate hands twitched nervously together. He struck at the horse
- madly with his stick. The driver laughed, and whipped up. He laughed in
- answer, and the man was silent.
- The way seemed interminable, and the streets like the black web of some
- sprawling spider. The monotony became unbearable, and, as the mist
- thickened, he felt afraid.
- Then they passed by lonely brickfields. The fog was lighter here, and he
- could see the strange bottle-shaped kilns with their orange fan-like
- tongues of fire. A dog barked as they went by, and far away in the
- darkness some wandering sea-gull screamed. The horse stumbled in a rut,
- then swerved aside, and broke into a gallop.
- After some time they left the clay road, and rattled again over
- rough-paven streets. Most of the windows were dark, but now and then
- fantastic shadows were silhouetted against some lamp-lit blind. He
- watched them curiously. They moved like monstrous marionettes, and made
- gestures like live things. He hated them. A dull rage was in his heart.
- As they turned a corner a woman yelled something at them from an open
- door, and two men ran after the hansom for about a hundred yards. The
- driver beat at them with his whip.
- It is said that passion makes one think in a circle. Certainly with
- hideous iteration the bitten lips of Dorian Gray shaped and reshaped
- those subtle words that dealt with soul and sense, till he had found in
- them the full expression, as it were, of his mood, and justified, by
- intellectual approval, passions that without such justification would
- still have dominated his temper. From cell to cell of his brain crept
- the one thought; and the wild desire to live, most terrible of all man's
- appetites, quickened into force each trembling nerve and fibre. Ugliness
- that had once been hateful to him because it made things real, became
- dear to him now for that very reason. Ugliness was the one reality. The
- coarse brawl, the loathsome den, the crude violence of disordered life,
- the very vileness of thief and outcast, were more vivid, in their
- intense actuality of impression, than all the gracious shapes of Art,
- the dreamy shadows of Song. They were what he needed for forgetfulness.
- In three days he would be free.
- Suddenly the man drew up with a jerk at the top of a dark lane. Over the
- low roofs and jagged chimney stacks of the houses rose the black masts
- of ships. Wreaths of white mist clung like ghostly sails to the yards.
- "Somewhere about here, sir, ain't it?" he asked huskily through the
- trap.
- Dorian started, and peered round. "This will do," he answered, and,
- having got out hastily, and given the driver the extra fare he had
- promised him, he walked quickly in the direction of the quay. Here and
- there a lantern gleamed at the stern of some huge merchantman. The light
- shook and splintered in the puddles. A red glare came from an
- outward-bound steamer that was coaling. The slimy pavement looked like a
- wet mackintosh.
- He hurried on towards the left, glancing back now and then to see if he
- was being followed. In about seven or eight minutes he reached a small
- shabby house, that was wedged in between two gaunt factories. In one of
- the top-windows stood a lamp. He stopped, and gave a peculiar knock.
- After a little time he heard steps in the passage, and the chain being
- unhooked. The door opened quietly, and he went in without saying a word
- to the squat misshapen figure that flattened itself into the shadow as
- he passed. At the end of the hall hung a tattered green curtain that
- swayed and shook in the gusty wind which had followed him in from the
- street. He dragged it aside, and entered a long, low room which looked
- as if it had once been a third-rate dancing-saloon. Shrill flaring
- gas-jets, dulled and distorted in the fly-blown mirrors that faced them,
- were ranged round the walls. Greasy reflectors of ribbed tin backed
- them, making quivering discs of light. The floor was covered with
- ochre-coloured sawdust, trampled here and there into mud, and stained
- with dark rings of spilt liquor. Some Malays were crouching by a little
- charcoal stove playing with bone counters, and showing their white teeth
- as they chattered. In one corner, with his head buried in his arms, a
- sailor sprawled over a table, and by the tawdrily-painted bar that ran
- across one complete side stood two haggard women mocking an old man who
- was brushing the sleeves of his coat with an expression of disgust. "He
- thinks he's got red ants on him," laughed one of them, as Dorian passed
- by. The man looked at her in terror and began to whimper.
- At the end of the room there was a little staircase, leading to a
- darkened chamber. As Dorian hurried up its three rickety steps, the
- heavy odour of opium met him. He heaved a deep breath, and his nostrils
- quivered with pleasure. When he entered, a young man with smooth yellow
- hair, who was bending over a lamp, lighting a long thin pipe, looked up
- at him, and nodded in a hesitating manner.
- "You here, Adrian?" muttered Dorian.
- "Where else should I be?" he answered, listlessly. "None of the chaps
- will speak to me now."
- "I thought you had left England."
- "Darlington is not going to do anything. My brother paid the bill at
- last. George doesn't speak to me either.... I don't care," he added,
- with a sigh. "As long as one has this stuff, one doesn't want friends. I
- think I have had too many friends."
- Dorian winced, and looked round at the grotesque things that lay in such
- fantastic postures on the ragged mattresses. The twisted limbs, the
- gaping mouths, the staring lustreless eyes, fascinated him. He knew in
- what strange heavens they were suffering, and what dull hells were
- teaching them the secret of some new joy. They were better off than he
- was. He was prisoned in thought. Memory, like a horrible malady, was
- eating his soul away. From time to time he seemed to see the eyes of
- Basil Hallward looking at him. Yet he felt he could not stay. The
- presence of Adrian Singleton troubled him. He wanted to be where no one
- would know who he was. He wanted to escape from himself.
- "I am going on to the other place," he said, after a pause.
- "On the wharf?"
- "Yes."
- "That mad-cat is sure to be there. They won't have her in this place
- now."
- Dorian shrugged his shoulders. "I am sick of women who love one. Women
- who hate one are much more interesting. Besides, the stuff is better."
- "Much the same."
- "I like it better. Come and have something to drink. I must have
- something."
- "I don't want anything," murmured the young man.
- "Never mind."
- Adrian Singleton rose up wearily, and followed Dorian to the bar. A
- half-caste, in a ragged turban and a shabby ulster, grinned a hideous
- greeting as he thrust a bottle of brandy and two tumblers in front of
- them. The women sidled up, and began to chatter. Dorian turned his back
- on them, and said something in a low voice to Adrian Singleton.
- A crooked smile, like a Malay crease, writhed across the face of one of
- the women. "We are very proud to-night," she sneered.
- "For God's sake don't talk to me," cried Dorian, stamping his foot on
- the ground. "What do you want? Money? Here it is. Don't ever talk to me
- again."
- Two red sparks flashed for a moment in the woman's sodden eyes, then
- flickered out, and left them dull and glazed. She tossed her head, and
- raked the coins off the counter with greedy fingers. Her companion
- watched her enviously.
- "It's no use," sighed Adrian Singleton. "I don't care to go back. What
- does it matter? I am quite happy here."
- "You will write to me if you want anything, won't you?" said Dorian,
- after a pause.
- "Perhaps."
- "Good-night, then."
- "Good-night," answered the young man, passing up the steps, and wiping
- his parched mouth with a handkerchief.
- Dorian walked to the door with a look of pain in his face. As he drew
- the curtain aside a hideous laugh broke from the painted lips of the
- woman who had taken his money. "There goes the devil's bargain!" she
- hiccoughed, in a hoarse voice.
- "Curse you!" he answered, "don't call me that."
- She snapped her fingers. "Prince Charming is what you like to be called,
- ain't it?" she yelled after him.
- The drowsy sailor leapt to his feet as she spoke, and looked wildly
- round. The sound of the shutting of the hall door fell on his ear. He
- rushed out as if in pursuit.
- Dorian Gray hurried along the quay through the drizzling rain. His
- meeting with Adrian Singleton had strangely moved him, and he wondered
- if the ruin of that young life was really to be laid at his door, as
- Basil Hallward had said to him with such infamy of insult. He bit his
- lip, and for a few seconds his eyes grew sad. Yet, after all, what did
- it matter to him? One's days were too brief to take the burden of
- another's errors on one's shoulders. Each man lived his own life, and
- paid his own price for living it. The only pity was one had to pay so
- often for a single fault. One had to pay over and over again, indeed. In
- her dealings with man Destiny never closed her accounts.
- There are moments, psychologists tell us, when the passion for sin, or
- for what the world calls sin, so dominates a nature, that every fibre of
- the body, as every cell of the brain, seems to be instinct with fearful
- impulses. Men and women at such moments lose the freedom of their will.
- They move to their terrible end as automatons move, Choice is taken from
- them, and conscience is either killed, or, if it lives at all, lives but
- to give rebellion its fascination, and disobedience its charm. For all
- sins, as theologians weary not of reminding us, are sins of
- disobedience. When that high spirit, that morning-star of evil, fell
- from heaven, it was as a rebel that he fell.
- Callous, concentrated on evil, with stained mind, and soul hungry for
- rebellion, Dorian Gray hastened on, quickening his step as he went, but
- as he darted aside into a dim archway, that had served him often as a
- short cut to the ill-famed place where he was going, he felt himself
- suddenly seized from behind, and before he had time to defend himself he
- was thrust back against the wall, with a brutal hand round his throat.
- He struggled madly for life, and by a terrible effort wrenched the
- tightening fingers away. In a second he heard the click of a revolver,
- and saw the gleam of a polished barrel pointing straight at his head,
- and the dusky form of a short thick-set man facing him.
- "What do you want?" he gasped.
- "Keep quiet," said the man. "If you stir, I shoot you."
- "You are mad. What have I done to you?"
- "You wrecked the life of Sibyl Vane," was the answer, "and Sibyl Vane
- was my sister. She killed herself. I know it. Her death is at your door.
- I swore I would kill you in return. For years I have sought you. I had
- no clue, no trace. The two people who could have described you were
- dead. I knew nothing of you but the pet name she used to call you. I
- heard it to-night by chance. Make your peace with God, for to-night you
- are going to die."
- Dorian Gray grew sick with fear. "I never knew her," he stammered. "I
- never heard of her. You are mad."
- "You had better confess your sin, for as sure as I am James Vane, you
- are going to die." There was a horrible moment. Dorian did not know what
- to say or do. "Down on your knees!" growled the man. "I give you one
- minute to make your peace--no more. I go on board to-night for India,
- and I must do my job first. One minute. That's all."
- Dorian's arms fell to his side. Paralysed with terror, he did not know
- what to do. Suddenly a wild hope flashed across his brain. "Stop," he
- cried. "How long ago is it since your sister died? Quick, tell me!"
- "Eighteen years," said the man. "Why do you ask me? What do years
- matter?"
- "Eighteen years," laughed Dorian Gray, with a touch of triumph in his
- voice. "Eighteen years! Set me under the lamp and look at my face!"
- James Vane hesitated for a moment, not understanding what was meant.
- Then he seized Dorian Gray and dragged him from the archway.
- Dim and wavering as was the wind-blown light, yet it served to show him
- the hideous error, as it seemed, into which he had fallen, for the face
- of the man he had sought to kill had all the bloom of boyhood, all the
- unstained purity of youth. He seemed little more than a lad of twenty
- summers, hardly older, if older indeed at all, than his sister had been
- when they had parted so many years ago. It was obvious that this was not
- the man who had destroyed her life.
- He loosened his hold and reeled back. "My God! my God!" he cried, "and I
- would have murdered you!"
- Dorian Gray drew a long breath. "You have been on the brink of
- committing a terrible crime, my man," he said, looking at him sternly.
- "Let this be a warning to you not to take vengeance into your own
- hands."
- "Forgive me, sir," muttered James Vane. "I was deceived. A chance word I
- heard in that damned den set me on the wrong track."
- "You had better go home, and put that pistol away, or you may get into
- trouble," said Dorian, turning on his heel, and going slowly down the
- street.
- James Vane stood on the pavement in horror. He was trembling from head
- to foot. After a little while a black shadow that had been creeping
- along the dripping wall, moved out into the light and came close to him
- with stealthy footsteps. He felt a hand laid on his arm and looked round
- with a start. It was one of the women who had been drinking at the bar.
- "Why didn't you kill him?" she hissed out, putting her haggard face
- quite close to his. "I knew you were following him when you rushed out
- from Daly's. You fool! You should have killed him. He has lots of money,
- and he's as bad as bad."
- "He is not the man I am looking for," he answered, "and I want no man's
- money. I want a man's life. The man whose life I want must be nearly
- forty now. This one is little more than a boy. Thank God, I have not got
- his blood upon my hands."
- The woman gave a bitter laugh. "Little more than a boy!" she sneered.
- "Why, man, it's nigh on eighteen years since Prince Charming made me
- what I am."
- "You lie!" cried James Vane.
- She raised her hand up to heaven. "Before God I am telling the truth,"
- she cried.
- "Before God?"
- "Strike me dumb if it ain't so. He is the worst one that comes here.
- They say he has sold himself to the devil for a pretty face. It's nigh
- on eighteen years since I met him. He hasn't changed much since then. I
- have though," she added, with a sickly leer.
- "You swear this?"
- "I swear it," came in hoarse echo from her flat mouth. "But don't give
- me away to him," she whined; "I am afraid of him. Let me have some money
- for my night's lodging."
- He broke from her with an oath, and rushed to the corner of the street,
- but Dorian Gray had disappeared. When he looked back, the woman had
- vanished also.
- CHAPTER XVII
- A week later Dorian Gray was sitting in the conservatory at Selby Royal
- talking to the pretty Duchess of Monmouth, who with her husband, a
- jaded-looking man of sixty, was amongst his guests. It was tea-time, and
- the mellow light of the huge lace-covered lamp that stood on the table
- lit up the delicate china and hammered silver of the service at which
- the Duchess was presiding. Her white hands were moving daintily among
- the cups, and her full red lips were smiling at something that Dorian
- had whispered to her. Lord Henry was lying back in a silk-draped wicker
- chair looking at them. On a peach-coloured divan sat Lady Narborough
- pretending to listen to the Duke's description of the last Brazilian
- beetle that he had added to his collection. Three young men in elaborate
- smoking-suits were handing tea-cakes to some of the women. The
- house-party consisted of twelve people, and there were more expected to
- arrive on the next day.
- "What are you two talking about?" said Lord Henry, strolling over to the
- table, and putting his cup down. "I hope Dorian has told you about my
- plan for rechristening everything, Gladys. It is a delightful idea."
- "But I don't want to be rechristened, Harry," rejoined the Duchess,
- looking up at him with her wonderful eyes. "I am quite satisfied with my
- own name, and I am sure Mr. Gray should be satisfied with his."
- "My dear Gladys, I would not alter either name for the world. They are
- both perfect. I was thinking chiefly of flowers. Yesterday I cut an
- orchid, for my buttonhole. It was a marvellous spotted thing, as
- effective as the seven deadly sins. In a thoughtless moment I asked one
- of the gardeners what it was called. He told me it was a fine specimen
- of _Robinsoniana_, or something dreadful of that kind. It is a sad
- truth, but we have lost the faculty of giving lovely names to things.
- Names are everything. I never quarrel with actions. My one quarrel is
- with words. That is the reason I hate vulgar realism in literature. The
- man who could call a spade a spade should be compelled to use one. It is
- the only thing he is fit for."
- "Then what should we call you, Harry?" she asked.
- "His name is Prince Paradox," said Dorian.
- "I recognise him in a flash," exclaimed the Duchess.
- "I won't hear of it," laughed Lord Henry, sinking into a chair. "From a
- label there is no escape! I refuse the title."
- "Royalties may not abdicate," fell as a warning from pretty lips.
- "You wish me to defend my throne, then?"
- "Yes."
- "I give the truths of to-morrow."
- "I prefer the mistakes of to-day," she answered.
- "You disarm me, Gladys," he cried, catching the wilfulness of her mood.
- "Of your shield, Harry: not of your spear."
- "I never tilt against Beauty," he said, with a wave of his hand.
- "That is your error, Harry, believe me. You value beauty far too much."
- "How can you say that? I admit that I think that it is better to be
- beautiful than to be good. But on the other hand no one is more ready
- than I am to acknowledge that it is better to be good than to be ugly."
- "Ugliness is one of the seven deadly sins, then?" cried the Duchess.
- "What becomes of your simile about the orchid?"
- "Ugliness is one of the seven deadly virtues, Gladys. You, as a good
- Tory, must not underrate them. Beer, the Bible, and the seven deadly
- virtues have made our England what she is."
- "You don't like your country, then?" she asked.
- "I live in it."
- "That you may censure it the better."
- "Would you have me take the verdict of Europe on it?" he inquired.
- "What do they say of us?"
- "That Tartuffe has emigrated to England and opened a shop."
- "Is that yours, Harry?"
- "I give it to you."
- "I could not use it. It is too true."
- "You need not be afraid. Our countrymen never recognise a description."
- "They are practical."
- "They are more cunning than practical. When they make up their ledger,
- they balance stupidity by wealth, and vice by hypocrisy."
- "Still, we have done great things."
- "Great things have been thrust on us, Gladys."
- "We have carried their burden."
- "Only as far as the Stock Exchange."
- She shook her head. "I believe in the race," she cried.
- "It represents the survival of the pushing."
- "It has development."
- "Decay fascinates me more."
- "What of Art?" she asked.
- "It is a malady."
- "Love?"
- "An illusion."
- "Religion?"
- "The fashionable substitute for Belief."
- "You are a sceptic."
- "Never! Scepticism is the beginning of Faith."
- "What are you?"
- "To define is to limit."
- "Give me a clue."
- "Threads snap. You would lose your way in the labyrinth."
- "You bewilder me. Let us talk of someone else."
- "Our host is a delightful topic. Years ago he was christened Prince
- Charming."
- "Ah! don't remind me of that," cried Dorian Gray.
- "Our host is rather horrid this evening," answered the Duchess,
- colouring. "I believe he thinks that Monmouth married me on purely
- scientific principles as the best specimen he could find of a modern
- butterfly."
- "Well, I hope he won't stick pins into you, Duchess," laughed Dorian.
- "Oh! my maid does that already, Mr. Gray, when she is annoyed with me."
- "And what does she get annoyed with you about, Duchess?"
- "For the most trivial things, Mr. Gray, I assure you. Usually because I
- come in at ten minutes to nine and tell her that I must be dressed by
- half-past eight."
- "How unreasonable of her! You should give her warning."
- "I daren't, Mr. Gray. Why, she invents hats for me. You remember the one
- I wore at Lady Hilstone's garden-party? You don't, but it is nice of you
- to pretend that you do. Well, she made it out of nothing. All good hats
- are made out of nothing."
- "Like all good reputations, Gladys," interrupted Lord Henry. "Every
- effect that one produces gives one an enemy. To be popular one must be a
- mediocrity."
- "Not with women," said the Duchess, shaking her head; "and women rule
- the world. I assure you we can't bear mediocrities. We women, as someone
- says, love with our ears, just as you men love with your eyes, if you
- ever love at all."
- "It seems to me that we never do anything else," murmured Dorian.
- "Ah! then, you never really love, Mr. Gray," answered the Duchess, with
- mock sadness.
- "My dear Gladys!" cried Lord Henry. "How can you say that? Romance lives
- by repetition, and repetition converts an appetite into an art. Besides,
- each time that one loves is the only time one has ever loved. Difference
- of object does not alter singleness of passion. It merely intensifies
- it. We can have in life but one great experience at best, and the secret
- of life is to reproduce that experience as often as possible."
- "Even when one has been wounded by it, Harry?" asked the Duchess, after
- a pause.
- "Especially when one has been wounded by it," answered Lord Henry.
- The Duchess turned and looked at Dorian Gray with a curious expression
- in her eyes. "What do you say to that, Mr. Gray?" she inquired.
- Dorian hesitated for a moment. Then he threw his head back and laughed.
- "I always agree with Harry, Duchess."
- "Even when he is wrong?"
- "Harry is never wrong, Duchess."
- "And does his philosophy make you happy?"
- "I have never searched for happiness. Who wants happiness? I have
- searched for pleasure."
- "And found it, Mr. Gray?"
- "Often. Too often."
- The Duchess sighed. "I am searching for peace," she said, "and if I
- don't go and dress, I shall have none this evening."
- "Let me get you some orchids, Duchess," cried Dorian, starting to his
- feet, and walking down the conservatory.
- "You are flirting disgracefully with him," said Lord Henry to his
- cousin. "You had better take care. He is very fascinating."
- "If he were not, there would be no battle."
- "Greek meets Greek, then?"
- "I am on the side of the Trojans. They fought for a woman."
- "They were defeated."
- "There are worse things than capture," she answered.
- "You gallop with a loose rein."
- "Pace gives life," was the _riposte_.
- "I shall write it in my diary to-night."
- "What?"
- "That a burnt child loves the fire."
- "I am not even singed. My wings are untouched."
- "You use them for everything, except flight."
- "Courage has passed from men to women. It is a new experience for us."
- "You have a rival."
- "Who?"
- He laughed. "Lady Narborough," he whispered. "She perfectly adores him."
- "You fill me with apprehension. The appeal to Antiquity is fatal to us
- who are romanticists."
- "Romanticists! You have all the methods of science."
- "Men have educated us."
- "But not explained you."
- "Describe us as a sex," was her challenge.
- "Sphynxes without secrets."
- She looked at him, smiling. "How long Mr. Gray is!" she said. "Let us go
- and help him. I have not yet told him the colour of my frock."
- "Ah! you must suit your frock to his flowers, Gladys."
- "That would be a premature surrender."
- "Romantic Art begins with its climax."
- "I must keep an opportunity for retreat."
- "In the Parthian manner?"
- "They found safety in the desert. I could not do that."
- "Women are not always allowed a choice," he answered, but hardly had he
- finished the sentence before from the far end of the conservatory came
- a stifled groan, followed by the dull sound of a heavy fall. Everybody
- started up. The Duchess stood motionless in horror. And with fear in his
- eyes Lord Henry rushed through the flapping palms to find Dorian Gray
- lying face downwards on the tiled floor in a death-like swoon.
- He was carried at once into the blue drawing-room, and laid upon one of
- the sofas. After a short time he came to himself, and looked round with
- a dazed expression.
- "What has happened?" he asked. "Oh! I remember. Am I safe here, Harry?"
- He began to tremble.
- "My dear Dorian," answered Lord Henry, "you merely fainted. That was
- all. You must have overtired yourself. You had better not come down to
- dinner. I will take your place."
- "No, I will come down," he said, struggling to his feet. "I would rather
- come down. I must not be alone."
- He went to his room and dressed. There was a wild recklessness of gaiety
- in his manner as he sat at table, but now and then a thrill of terror
- ran through him when he remembered that, pressed against the window of
- the conservatory, like a white handkerchief, he had seen the face of
- James Vane watching him.
- CHAPTER XVIII
- The next day he did not leave the house, and, indeed, spent most of the
- time in his own room, sick with a wild terror of dying, and yet
- indifferent to life itself. The consciousness of being hunted, snared,
- tracked down, had begun to dominate him. If the tapestry did but tremble
- in the wind, he shook. The dead leaves that were blown against the
- leaded panes seemed to him like his own wasted resolutions and wild
- regrets. When he closed his eyes, he saw again the sailor's face peering
- through the mist-stained glass, and horror seemed once more to lay its
- hand upon his heart.
- But perhaps it had been only his fancy that had called vengeance out of
- the night, and set the hideous shapes of punishment before him. Actual
- life was chaos, but there was something terribly logical in the
- imagination. It was the imagination that set remorse to dog the feet of
- sin. It was the imagination that made each crime bear its misshapen
- brood. In the common world of fact the wicked were not punished, nor the
- good rewarded. Success was given to the strong, failure thrust upon the
- weak. That was all. Besides, had any stranger been prowling round the
- house he would have been seen by the servants or the keepers. Had any
- footmarks been found on the flower-beds, the gardeners would have
- reported it. Yes: it had been merely fancy. Sibyl Vane's brother had not
- come back to kill him. He had sailed away in his ship to founder in some
- winter sea. From him, at any rate, he was safe. Why, the man did not
- know who he was, could not know who he was. The mask of youth had saved
- him.
- And yet if it had been merely an illusion, how terrible it was to think
- that conscience could raise such fearful phantoms, and give them visible
- form, and make them move before one! What sort of life would his be, if
- day and night, shadows of his crime were to peer at him from silent
- corners, to mock him from secret places, to whisper in his ear as he sat
- at the feast, to wake him with icy fingers as he lay asleep! As the
- thought crept through his brain, he grew pale with terror, and the air
- seemed to him to have become suddenly colder. Oh! in what a wild hour of
- madness he had killed his friend! How ghastly the mere memory of the
- scene! He saw it all again. Each hideous detail came back to him with
- added horror. Out of the black cave of Time, terrible and swathed in
- scarlet, rose the image of his sin. When Lord Henry came in at six
- o'clock, he found him crying as one whose heart will break.
- It was not till the third day that he ventured to go out. There was
- something in the clear, pine-scented air of that winter morning that
- seemed to bring him back his joyousness and his ardour for life. But it
- was not merely the physical conditions of environment that had caused
- the change. His own nature had revolted against the excess of anguish
- that had sought to maim and mar the perfection of its calm. With subtle
- and finely-wrought temperaments it is always so. Their strong passions
- must either bruise or bend. They either slay the man, or themselves die.
- Shallow sorrows and shallow loves live on. The loves and sorrows that
- are great are destroyed by their own plenitude. Besides, he had
- convinced himself that he had been the victim of a terror-stricken
- imagination, and looked back now on his fears with something of pity and
- not a little of contempt.
- After breakfast he walked with the Duchess for an hour in the garden,
- and then drove across the park to join the shooting-party. The crisp
- frost lay like salt upon the grass. The sky was an inverted cup of blue
- metal. A thin film of ice bordered the flat reed-grown lake.
- At the corner of the pine-wood he caught sight of Sir Geoffrey Clouston,
- the Duchess's brother, jerking two spent cartridges out of his gun. He
- jumped from the cart, and having told the groom to take the mare home,
- made his way towards his guest through the withered bracken and rough
- undergrowth.
- "Have you had good sport, Geoffrey?" he asked.
- "Not very good, Dorian. I think most of the birds have gone to the open.
- I dare say it will be better after lunch, when we get to new ground."
- Dorian strolled along by his side. The keen aromatic air, the brown and
- red lights that glimmered in the wood, the hoarse cries of the beaters
- ringing out from time to time, and the sharp snaps of the guns that
- followed, fascinated him, and filled him with a sense of delightful
- freedom. He was dominated by the carelessness of happiness, by the high
- indifference of joy.
- Suddenly from a lumpy tussock of old grass, some twenty yards in front
- of them, with black-tipped ears erect, and long hinder limbs throwing it
- forward, started a hare. It bolted for a thicket of alders. Sir Geoffrey
- put his gun to his shoulder, but there was something in the animal's
- grace of movement that strangely charmed Dorian Gray, and he cried out
- at once, "Don't shoot it, Geoffrey. Let it live."
- "What nonsense, Dorian!" laughed his companion, and as the hare bounded
- into the thicket he fired. There were two cries heard, the cry of a hare
- in pain, which is dreadful, the cry of a man in agony, which is worse.
- "Good heavens! I have hit a beater!" exclaimed Sir Geoffrey. "What an
- ass the man was to get in front of the guns! Stop shooting there!" he
- called out at the top of his voice. "A man is hurt."
- The head-keeper came running up with a stick in his hand.
- "Where, sir? Where is he?" he shouted. At the same time the firing
- ceased along the line.
- "Here," answered Sir Geoffrey, angrily, hurrying towards the thicket.
- "Why on earth don't you keep your men back? Spoiled my shooting for the
- day."
- Dorian watched them as they plunged into the alder-clump, brushing the
- lithe, swinging branches aside. In a few moments they emerged, dragging
- a body after them into the sunlight. He turned away in horror. It seemed
- to him that misfortune followed wherever he went. He heard Sir Geoffrey
- ask if the man was really dead, and the affirmative answer of the
- keeper. The wood seemed to him to have become suddenly alive with faces.
- There was the trampling of myriad feet, and the low buzz of voices. A
- great copper-breasted pheasant came beating through the boughs overhead.
- After a few moments, that were to him, in his perturbed state, like
- endless hours of pain, he felt a hand laid on his shoulder. He started,
- and looked round.
- "Dorian," said Lord Henry, "I had better tell them that the shooting is
- stopped for to-day. It would not look well to go on."
- "I wish it were stopped for ever, Harry," he answered, bitterly. "The
- whole thing is hideous and cruel. Is the man...?"
- He could not finish the sentence.
- "I am afraid so," rejoined Lord Henry. "He got the whole charge of shot
- in his chest. He must have died almost instantaneously. Come; let us go
- home."
- They walked side by side in the direction of the avenue for nearly fifty
- yards without speaking. Then Dorian looked at Lord Henry, and said, with
- a heavy sigh, "It is a bad omen, Harry, a very bad omen."
- "What is?" asked Lord Henry. "Oh! this accident, I suppose. My dear
- fellow, it can't be helped. It was the man's own fault. Why did he get
- in front of the guns? Besides, it's nothing to us. It is rather awkward
- for Geoffrey, of course. It does not do to pepper beaters. It makes
- people think that one is a wild shot. And Geoffrey is not; he shoots
- very straight. But there is no use talking about the matter."
- Dorian shook his head. "It is a bad omen, Harry. I feel as if something
- horrible were going to happen to some of us. To myself, perhaps," he
- added, passing his hand over his eyes, with a gesture of pain.
- The elder man laughed. "The only horrible thing in the world is _ennui_,
- Dorian. That is the one sin for which there is no forgiveness. But we
- are not likely to suffer from it, unless these fellows keep chattering
- about this thing at dinner. I must tell them that the subject is to be
- tabooed. As for omens, there is no such thing as an omen. Destiny does
- not send us heralds. She is too wise or too cruel for that. Besides,
- what on earth could happen to you, Dorian? You have everything in the
- world that a man can want. There is no one who would not be delighted to
- change places with you."
- "There is no one with whom I would not change places, Harry. Don't laugh
- like that. I am telling you the truth. The wretched peasant who has just
- died is better off than I am. I have no terror of Death. It is the
- coming of Death that terrifies me. Its monstrous wings seem to wheel in
- the leaden air around me. Good heavens! don't you see a man moving
- behind the trees there, watching me, waiting for me?"
- Lord Henry looked in the direction in which the trembling gloved hand
- was pointing. "Yes," he said, smiling, "I see the gardener waiting for
- you. I suppose he wants to ask you what flowers you wish to have on the
- table to-night. How absurdly nervous you are, my dear fellow! You must
- come and see my doctor, when we get back to town."
- Dorian heaved a sigh of relief as he saw the gardener approaching. The
- man touched his hat, glanced for a moment at Lord Henry in a hesitating
- manner, and then produced a letter, which he handed to his master. "Her
- Grace told me to wait for an answer," he murmured.
- Dorian put the letter into his pocket. "Tell her Grace that I am coming
- in," he said, coldly. The man turned round, and went rapidly in the
- direction of the house.
- "How fond women are of doing dangerous things!" laughed Lord Henry. "It
- is one of the qualities in them that I admire most. A woman will flirt
- with anybody in the world as long as other people are looking on."
- "How fond you are of saying dangerous things, Harry! In the present
- instance you are quite astray. I like the Duchess very much, but I don't
- love her."
- "And the Duchess loves you very much, but she likes you less, so you are
- excellently matched."
- "You are talking scandal, Harry, and there is never any basis for
- scandal."
- "The basis of every scandal is an immoral certainty," said Lord Henry,
- lighting a cigarette.
- "You would sacrifice anybody, Harry, for the sake of an epigram."
- "The world goes to the altar of its own accord," was the answer.
- "I wish I could love," cried Dorian Gray, with a deep note of pathos in
- his voice. "But I seem to have lost the passion, and forgotten the
- desire. I am too much concentrated on myself. My own personality has
- become a burden to me. I want to escape, to go away, to forget. It was
- silly of me to come down here at all. I think I shall send a wire to
- Harvey to have the yacht got ready. On a yacht one is safe."
- "Safe from what, Dorian? You are in some trouble. Why not tell me what
- it is? You know I would help you."
- "I can't tell you, Harry," he answered, sadly. "And I dare say it is
- only a fancy of mine. This unfortunate accident has upset me. I have a
- horrible presentiment that something of the kind may happen to me."
- "What nonsense!"
- "I hope it is, but I can't help feeling it. Ah! here is the Duchess,
- looking like Artemis in a tailor-made gown. You see we have come back,
- Duchess."
- "I have heard all about it, Mr. Gray," she answered. "Poor Geoffrey is
- terribly upset. And it seems that you asked him not to shoot the hare.
- How curious!"
- "Yes, it was very curious. I don't know what made me say it. Some whim,
- I suppose. It looked the loveliest of little live things. But I am sorry
- they told you about the man. It is a hideous subject."
- "It is an annoying subject," broke in Lord Henry. "It has no
- psychological value at all. Now if Geoffrey had done the thing on
- purpose, how interesting he would be! I should like to know someone who
- had committed a real murder."
- "How horrid of you, Harry!" cried the Duchess. "Isn't it, Mr. Gray?
- Harry, Mr. Gray is ill again. He is going to faint."
- Dorian drew himself up with an effort, and smiled. "It is nothing,
- Duchess," he murmured; "my nerves are dreadfully out of order. That is
- all. I am afraid I walked too far this morning. I didn't hear what Harry
- said. Was it very bad? You must tell me some other time. I think I must
- go and lie down. You will excuse me, won't you?"
- They had reached the great flight of steps that led from the
- conservatory on to the terrace. As the glass door closed behind Dorian,
- Lord Henry turned and looked at the Duchess with his slumberous eyes.
- "Are you very much in love with him?" he asked.
- She did not answer for some time, but stood gazing at the landscape. "I
- wish I knew," she said at last.
- He shook his head. "Knowledge would be fatal. It is the uncertainty
- that charms one. A mist makes things wonderful."
- "One may lose one's way."
- "All ways end at the same point, my dear Gladys."
- "What is that?"
- "Disillusion."
- "It was my _début_ in life," she sighed.
- "It came to you crowned."
- "I am tired of strawberry leaves."
- "They become you."
- "Only in public."
- "You would miss them," said Lord Henry.
- "I will not part with a petal."
- "Monmouth has ears."
- "Old age is dull of hearing."
- "Has he never been jealous?"
- "I wish he had been."
- He glanced about as if in search of something. "What are you looking
- for?" she inquired.
- "The button from your foil," he answered. "You have dropped it."
- She laughed. "I have still the mask."
- "It makes your eyes lovelier," was his reply.
- She laughed again. Her teeth showed like white seeds in a scarlet fruit.
- Upstairs, in his own room, Dorian Gray was lying on a sofa, with terror
- in every tingling fibre of his body. Life had suddenly become too
- hideous a burden for him to bear. The dreadful death of the unlucky
- beater, shot in the thicket like a wild animal, had seemed to him to
- prefigure death for himself also. He had nearly swooned at what Lord
- Henry had said in a chance mood of cynical jesting.
- At five o'clock he rang his bell for his servant and gave him orders to
- pack his things for the night-express to town, and to have the brougham
- at the door by eight-thirty. He was determined not to sleep another
- night at Selby Royal. It was an ill-omened place. Death walked there in
- the sunlight. The grass of the forest had been spotted with blood.
- Then he wrote a note to Lord Henry, telling him that he was going up to
- town to consult his doctor, and asking him to entertain his guests in
- his absence. As he was putting it into the envelope, a knock came to the
- door, and his valet informed him that the head-keeper wished to see him.
- He frowned, and bit his lip. "Send him in," he muttered, after some
- moments' hesitation.
- As soon as the man entered Dorian pulled his chequebook out of a drawer,
- and spread it out before him.
- "I suppose you have come about the unfortunate accident of this morning,
- Thornton?" he said, taking up a pen.
- "Yes, sir," answered the gamekeeper.
- "Was the poor fellow married? Had he any people dependent on him?" asked
- Dorian, looking bored. "If so, I should not like them to be left in
- want, and will send them any sum of money you may think necessary."
- "We don't know who he is, sir. That is what I took the liberty of coming
- to you about."
- "Don't know who he is?" said Dorian, listlessly. "What do you mean?
- Wasn't he one of your men?"
- "No, sir. Never saw him before. Seems like a sailor, sir."
- The pen dropped from Dorian Gray's hand, and he felt as if his heart had
- suddenly stopped beating. "A sailor?" he cried out. "Did you say a
- sailor?"
- "Yes, sir. He looks as if he had been a sort of sailor; tattooed on both
- arms, and that kind of thing."
- "Was there anything found on him?" said Dorian, leaning forward and
- looking at the man with startled eyes. "Anything that would tell his
- name?"
- "Some money, sir--not much, and a six-shooter. There was no name of any
- kind. A decent-looking man, sir, but rough-like. A sort of sailor, we
- think."
- Dorian started to his feet. A terrible hope fluttered past him. He
- clutched at it madly. "Where is the body?" he exclaimed. "Quick! I must
- see it at once."
- "It is in an empty stable in the Home Farm, sir. The folk don't like to
- have that sort of thing in their houses. They say a corpse brings bad
- luck."
- "The Home Farm! Go there at once and meet me. Tell one of the grooms to
- bring my horse round. No. Never mind. I'll go to the stables myself. It
- will save time."
- In less than a quarter of an hour Dorian Gray was galloping down the
- long avenue as hard as he could go. The trees seemed to sweep past him
- in spectral procession, and wild shadows to fling themselves across his
- path. Once the mare swerved at a white gate-post and nearly threw him.
- He lashed her across the neck with his crop. She cleft the dusky air
- like an arrow. The stones flew from her hoofs.
- At last he reached the Home Farm. Two men were loitering in the yard. He
- leapt from the saddle and threw the reins to one of them. In the
- farthest stable a light was glimmering. Something seemed to tell him
- that the body was there, and he hurried to the door, and put his hand
- upon the latch.
- There he paused for a moment, feeling that he was on the brink of a
- discovery that would either make or mar his life. Then he thrust the
- door open, and entered.
- On a heap of sacking in the far corner was lying the dead body of a man
- dressed in a coarse shirt and a pair of blue trousers. A spotted
- handkerchief had been placed over the face. A coarse candle, stuck in a
- bottle, sputtered beside it.
- Dorian Gray shuddered. He felt that his could not be the hand to take
- the handkerchief away, and called out to one of the farm-servants to
- come to him.
- "Take that thing off the face. I wish to see it," he said, clutching at
- the doorpost for support.
- When the farm-servant had done so, he stepped forward. A cry of joy
- broke from his lips. The man who had been shot in the thicket was James
- Vane.
- He stood there for some minutes looking at the dead body. As he rode
- home, his eyes were full of tears, for he knew he was safe.
- CHAPTER XIX
- "There is no use your telling me that you are going to be good," cried
- Lord Henry, dipping his white fingers into a red copper bowl filled with
- rose-water. "You're quite perfect. Pray, don't change."
- Dorian Gray shook his head. "No, Harry, I have done too many dreadful
- things in my life. I am not going to do any more. I began my good
- actions yesterday."
- "Where were you yesterday?"
- "In the country, Harry. I was staying at a little inn by myself."
- "My dear boy," said Lord Henry, smiling, "anybody can be good in the
- country. There are no temptations there. That is the reason why people
- who live out of town are so absolutely uncivilised. Civilisation is not
- by any means an easy thing to attain to. There are only two ways by
- which man can reach it. One is by being cultured, the other by being
- corrupt. Country people have no opportunity of being either, so they
- stagnate."
- "Culture and corruption," echoed Dorian. "I have known something of
- both. It seems terrible to me now that they should ever be found
- together. For I have a new ideal, Harry. I am going to alter. I think I
- have altered."
- "You have not yet told me what your good action was. Or did you say you
- had done more than one?" asked his companion, as he spilt into his plate
- a little crimson pyramid of seeded strawberries, and through a
- perforated shell-shaped spoon snowed white sugar upon them.
- "I can tell you, Harry. It is not a story I could tell to anyone else. I
- spared somebody. It sounds vain, but you understand what I mean. She was
- quite beautiful, and wonderfully like Sibyl Vane. I think it was that
- which first attracted me to her. You remember Sibyl, don't you? How long
- ago that seems! Well, Hetty was not one of our own class, of course. She
- was simply a girl in a village. But I really loved her. I am quite sure
- that I loved her. All during this wonderful May that we have been
- having, I used to run down and see her two or three times a week.
- Yesterday she met me in a little orchard. The apple-blossoms kept
- tumbling down on her hair, and she was laughing. We were to have gone
- away together this morning at dawn. Suddenly I determined to leave her
- as flower-like as I had found her."
- "I should think the novelty of the emotion must have given you a thrill
- of real pleasure, Dorian," interrupted Lord Henry. "But I can finish
- your idyll for you. You gave her good advice, and broke her heart. That
- was the beginning of your reformation."
- "Harry, you are horrible! You mustn't say these dreadful things. Hetty's
- heart is not broken. Of course she cried, and all that. But there is no
- disgrace upon her. She can live, like Perdita, in her garden of mint and
- marigold."
- "And weep over a faithless Florizel," said Lord Henry, laughing, as he
- leant back in his chair. "My dear Dorian, you have the most curiously
- boyish moods. Do you think this girl will ever be really contented now
- with anyone of her own rank? I suppose she will be married some day to a
- rough carter or a grinning ploughman. Well, the fact of having met you,
- and loved you, will teach her to despise her husband, and she will be
- wretched. From a moral point of view, I cannot say that I think much of
- your great renunciation. Even as a beginning, it is poor. Besides, how
- do you know that Hetty isn't floating at the present moment in some
- star-lit mill-pond, with lovely water-lilies round her, like Ophelia?"
- "I can't bear this, Harry! You mock at everything, and then suggest the
- most serious tragedies. I am sorry I told you now. I don't care what you
- say to me. I know I was right in acting as I did. Poor Hetty! As I rode
- past the farm this morning, I saw her white face at the window, like a
- spray of jasmine. Don't let us talk about it any more, and don't try to
- persuade me that the first good action I have done for years, the first
- little bit of self-sacrifice I have ever known, is really a sort of sin.
- I want to be better. I am going to be better. Tell me something about
- yourself. What is going on in town? I have not been to the club for
- days."
- "The people are still discussing poor Basil's disappearance."
- "I should have thought they had got tired of that by this time," said
- Dorian, pouring himself out some wine, and frowning slightly.
- "My dear boy, they have only been talking about it for six weeks, and
- the British public are really not equal to the mental strain of having
- more than one topic every three months. They have been very fortunate
- lately, however. They have had my own divorce-case, and Alan Campbell's
- suicide. Now they have got the mysterious disappearance of an artist.
- Scotland Yard still insists that the man in the grey ulster who left for
- Paris by the midnight train on the ninth of November was poor Basil, and
- the French police declare that Basil never arrived in Paris at all. I
- suppose in about a fortnight we shall be told that he has been seen in
- San Francisco. It is an odd thing, but everyone who disappears is said
- to be seen at San Francisco. It must be a delightful city, and possess
- all the attractions of the next world."
- "What do you think has happened to Basil?" asked Dorian, holding up his
- Burgundy against the light, and wondering how it was that he could
- discuss the matter so calmly.
- "I have not the slightest idea. If Basil chooses to hide himself, it is
- no business of mine. If he is dead, I don't want to think about him.
- Death is the only thing that ever terrifies me. I hate it."
- "Why?" said the younger man, wearily.
- "Because," said Lord Henry, passing beneath his nostrils the gilt
- trellis of an open vinaigrette box, "one can survive everything nowadays
- except that. Death and vulgarity are the only two facts in the
- nineteenth century that one cannot explain away. Let us have our coffee
- in the music-room, Dorian. You must play Chopin to me. The man with whom
- my wife ran away played Chopin exquisitely. Poor Victoria! I was very
- fond of her. The house is rather lonely without her. Of course married
- life is merely a habit, a bad habit. But then one regrets the loss even
- of one's worst habits. Perhaps one regrets them the most. They are such
- an essential part of one's personality."
- Dorian said nothing, but rose from the table and, passing into the next
- room, sat down to the piano and let his fingers stray across the white
- and black ivory of the keys. After the coffee had been brought in, he
- stopped, and, looking over at Lord Henry, said, "Harry, did it ever
- occur to you that Basil was murdered?"
- Lord Henry yawned. "Basil was very popular, and always wore a Waterbury
- watch. Why should he have been murdered? He was not clever enough to
- have enemies. Of course he had a wonderful genius for painting. But a
- man can paint like Velasquez and yet be as dull as possible. Basil was
- really rather dull. He only interested me once, and that was when he
- told me, years ago, that he had a wild adoration for you, and that you
- were the dominant motive of his art."
- "I was very fond of Basil," said Dorian, with a note of sadness in his
- voice. "But don't people say that he was murdered?"
- "Oh, some of the papers do. It does not seem to me to be at all
- probable. I know there are dreadful places in Paris, but Basil was not
- the sort of man to have gone to them. He had no curiosity. It was his
- chief defect."
- "What would you say, Harry, if I told you that I had murdered Basil?"
- said the younger man. He watched him intently after he had spoken.
- "I would say, my dear fellow, that you were posing for a character that
- doesn't suit you. All crime is vulgar, just as all vulgarity is crime.
- It is not in you, Dorian, to commit a murder. I am sorry if I hurt your
- vanity by saying so, but I assure you it is true. Crime belongs
- exclusively to the lower orders. I don't blame them in the smallest
- degree. I should fancy that crime was to them what art is to us, simply
- a method of procuring extraordinary sensations."
- "A method of procuring sensations? Do you think, then, that a man who
- has once committed a murder could possibly do the same crime again?
- Don't tell me that."
- "Oh! anything becomes a pleasure if one does it too often," cried Lord
- Henry, laughing. "That is one of the most important secrets of life. I
- should fancy, however, that murder is always a mistake. One should never
- do any thing that one cannot talk about after dinner. But let us pass
- from poor Basil. I wish I could believe that he had come to such a
- really romantic end as you suggest; but I can't. I dare say he fell into
- the Seine off an omnibus, and that the conductor hushed up the scandal.
- Yes: I should fancy that was his end. I see him lying now on his back
- under those dull-green waters with the heavy barges floating over him,
- and long weeds catching in his hair. Do you know, I don't think he would
- have done much more good work. During the last ten years his painting
- had gone off very much."
- Dorian heaved a sigh, and Lord Henry strolled across the room and began
- to stroke the head of a curious Java parrot, a large grey-plumaged bird,
- with pink crest and tail, that was balancing itself upon a bamboo perch.
- As his pointed fingers touched it, it dropped the white scurf of
- crinkled lids over black glass-like eyes, and began to sway backwards
- and forwards.
- "Yes," he continued, turning round, and taking his handkerchief out of
- his pocket; "his painting had quite gone off. It seemed to me to have
- lost something. It had lost an ideal. When you and he ceased to be great
- friends, he ceased to be a great artist. What was it separated you? I
- suppose he bored you. If so, he never forgave you. It's a habit bores
- have. By the way, what has become of that wonderful portrait he did of
- you? I don't think I have ever seen it since he finished it. Oh! I
- remember your telling me years ago that you had sent it down to Selby,
- and that it had got mislaid or stolen on the way. You never got it back?
- What a pity! It was really a masterpiece. I remember I wanted to buy it.
- I wish I had now. It belonged to Basil's best period. Since then, his
- work was that curious mixture of bad painting and good intentions that
- always entitles a man to be called a representative British artist. Did
- you advertise for it? You should."
- "I forget," said Dorian. "I suppose I did. But I never really liked it.
- I am sorry I sat for it. The memory of the thing is hateful to me. Why
- do you talk of it? It used to remind me of those curious lines in some
- play--'Hamlet,' I think--how do they run?--
- "'Like the painting of a sorrow,
- A face without a heart.'
- Yes: that is what it was like."
- Lord Henry laughed. "If a man treats life artistically, his brain is his
- heart," he answered, sinking into an arm-chair.
- Dorian Gray shook his head, and struck some soft chords on the piano.
- "'Like the painting of a sorrow,'" he repeated, "'a face without a
- heart.'"
- The elder man lay back and looked at him with half-closed eyes. "By the
- way, Dorian," he said, after a pause, "'what does it profit a man if he
- gain the whole world and lose'--how does the quotation run?--'his own
- soul'?"
- The music jarred and Dorian Gray started, and stared at his friend. "Why
- do you ask me that, Harry?"
- "My dear fellow," said Lord Henry, elevating his eyebrows in surprise,
- "I asked you because I thought you might be able to give me an answer.
- That is all. I was going through the Park last Sunday, and close by the
- Marble Arch there stood a little crowd of shabby-looking people
- listening to some vulgar street-preacher. As I passed by, I heard the
- man yelling out that question to his audience. It struck me as being
- rather dramatic. London is very rich in curious effects of that kind. A
- wet Sunday, an uncouth Christian in a mackintosh, a ring of sickly white
- faces under a broken roof of dripping umbrellas, and a wonderful phrase
- flung into the air by shrill, hysterical lips--it was really very good
- in its way, quite a suggestion. I thought of telling the prophet that
- Art had a soul, but that man had not. I am afraid, however, he would not
- have understood me."
- "Don't, Harry. The soul is a terrible reality. It can be bought, and
- sold, and bartered away. It can be poisoned, or made perfect. There is a
- soul in each one of us. I know it."
- "Do you feel quite sure of that, Dorian?"
- "Quite sure."
- "Ah! then it must be an illusion. The things one feels absolutely
- certain about are never true. That is the fatality of Faith, and the
- lesson of Romance. How grave you are! Don't be so serious. What have
- you or I to do with the superstitions of our age? No: we have given up
- our belief in the soul. Play me something. Play me a nocturne, Dorian,
- and, as you play, tell me, in a low voice, how you have kept your youth.
- You must have some secret. I am only ten years older than you are, and I
- am wrinkled, and worn, and yellow. You are really wonderful, Dorian. You
- have never looked more charming than you do to-night. You remind me of
- the day I saw you first. You were rather cheeky, very shy, and
- absolutely extraordinary. You have changed, of course, but not in
- appearance. I wish you would tell me your secret. To get back my youth I
- would do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or
- be respectable. Youth! There is nothing like it. It's absurd to talk of
- the ignorance of youth. The only people to whose opinions I listen now
- with any respect are people much younger than myself. They seem in front
- of me. Life has revealed to them her latest wonder. As for the aged, I
- always contradict the aged. I do it on principle. If you ask them their
- opinion on something that happened yesterday, they solemnly give you the
- opinions current in 1820, when people wore high stocks, believed in
- everything, and knew absolutely nothing. How lovely that thing you are
- playing is! I wonder did Chopin write it at Majorca, with the sea
- weeping round the villa, and the salt spray dashing against the panes?
- It is marvellously romantic. What a blessing it is that there is one art
- left to us that is not imitative! Don't stop. I want music to-night. It
- seems to me that you are the young Apollo, and that I am Marsyas
- listening to you. I have sorrows, Dorian, of my own, that even you know
- nothing of. The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one
- is young. I am amazed sometimes at my own sincerity. Ah, Dorian, how
- happy you are! What an exquisite life you have had! You have drunk
- deeply of everything. You have crushed the grapes against your palate.
- Nothing has been hidden from you. And it has all been to you no more
- than the sound of music. It has not marred you. You are still the same."
- "I am not the same, Harry."
- "Yes: you are the same. I wonder what the rest of your life will be.
- Don't spoil it by renunciations. At present you are a perfect type.
- Don't make yourself incomplete. You are quite flawless now. You need not
- shake your head: you know you are. Besides, Dorian, don't deceive
- yourself. Life is not governed by will or intention. Life is a question
- of nerves, and fibres, and slowly built-up cells in which thought hides
- itself and passion has its dreams. You may fancy yourself safe, and
- think yourself strong. But a chance tone of colour in a room or a
- morning sky, a particular perfume that you had once loved and that
- brings subtle memories with it, a line from a forgotten poem that you
- had come across again, a cadence from a piece of music that you had
- ceased to play--I tell you, Dorian, that it is on things like these that
- our lives depend. Browning writes about that somewhere; but our own
- senses will imagine them for us. There are moments when the odour of
- _lilas blanc_ passes suddenly across me, and I have to live the
- strangest month of my life over again. I wish I could change places with
- you, Dorian. The world has cried out against us both, but it has always
- worshipped you. It always will worship you. You are the type of what the
- age is searching for, and what it is afraid it has found. I am so glad
- that you have never done anything, never carved a statue, or painted a
- picture, or produced anything outside of yourself! Life has been your
- art. You have set yourself to music. Your days are your sonnets."
- Dorian rose up from the piano, and passed his hand through his hair.
- "Yes, life has been exquisite," he murmured, "but I am not going to have
- the same life, Harry. And you must not say these extravagant things to
- me. You don't know everything about me. I think that if you did, even
- you would turn from me. You laugh. Don't laugh."
- "Why have you stopped playing, Dorian? Go back and give me the nocturne
- over again. Look at that great honey-coloured moon that hangs in the
- dusky air. She is waiting for you to charm her, and if you play she will
- come closer to the earth. You won't? Let us go to the club, then. It has
- been a charming evening, and we must end it charmingly. There is some
- one at White's who wants immensely to know you--young Lord Poole,
- Bournemouth's eldest son. He has already copied your neckties, and has
- begged me to introduce him to you. He is quite delightful, and rather
- reminds me of you."
- "I hope not," said Dorian, with a sad look in his eyes. "But I am tired
- to-night, Harry. I shan't go to the club. It is nearly eleven, and I
- want to go to bed early."
- "Do stay. You have never played so well as to-night. There was something
- in your touch that was wonderful. It had more expression than I had ever
- heard from it before."
- "It is because I am going to be good," he answered, smiling, "I am a
- little changed already."
- "You cannot change to me, Dorian," said Lord Henry. "You and I will
- always be friends."
- "Yet you poisoned me with a book once. I should not forgive that. Harry,
- promise me that you will never lend that book to any one. It does harm."
- "My dear boy, you are really beginning to moralise. You will soon be
- going about like the converted, and the revivalist, warning people
- against all the sins of which you have grown tired. You are much too
- delightful to do that. Besides, it is no use. You and I are what we are,
- and will be what we will be. As for being poisoned by a book, there is
- no such thing as that. Art has no influence upon action. It annihilates
- the desire to act. It is superbly sterile. The books that the world
- calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame. That is all.
- But we won't discuss literature. Come round to-morrow. I am going to
- ride at eleven. We might go together, and I will take you to lunch
- afterwards with Lady Branksome. She is a charming woman, and wants to
- consult you about some tapestries she is thinking of buying. Mind you
- come. Or shall we lunch with our little Duchess? She says she never sees
- you now. Perhaps you are tired of Gladys? I thought you would be. Her
- clever tongue gets on one's nerves. Well, in any case, be here at
- eleven."
- "Must I really come, Harry?"
- "Certainly. The Park is quite lovely now. I don't think there have been
- such lilacs since the year I met you."
- "Very well. I shall be here at eleven," said Dorian. "Good-night,
- Harry." As he reached the door he hesitated for a moment, as if he had
- something more to say. Then he sighed and went out.
- CHAPTER XX
- It was a lovely night, so warm that he threw his coat over his arm, and
- did not even put his silk scarf round his throat. As he strolled home,
- smoking his cigarette, two young men in evening dress passed him. He
- heard one of them whisper to the other, "That is Dorian Gray." He
- remembered how pleased he used to be when he was pointed out, or stared
- at, or talked about. He was tired of hearing his own name now. Half the
- charm of the little village where he had been so often lately was that
- no one knew who he was. He had often told the girl whom he had lured to
- love him that he was poor, and she had believed him. He had told her
- once that he was wicked, and she had laughed at him, and answered that
- wicked people were always very old and very ugly. What a laugh she
- had!--just like a thrush singing. And how pretty she had been in her
- cotton dresses and her large hats! She knew nothing, but she had
- everything that he had lost.
- When he reached home, he found his servant waiting up for him. He sent
- him to bed, and threw himself down on the sofa in the library, and began
- to think over some of the things that Lord Henry had said to him.
- Was it really true that one could never change? He felt a wild longing
- for the unstained purity of his boyhood--his rose-white boyhood, as Lord
- Henry had once called it. He knew that he had tarnished himself, filled
- his mind with corruption, and given horror to his fancy; that he had
- been an evil influence to others, and had experienced a terrible joy in
- being so; and that, of the lives that had crossed his own, it had been
- the fairest and the most full of promise that he had brought to shame.
- But was it all irretrievable? Was there no hope for him?
- Ah! in what a monstrous moment of pride and passion he had prayed that
- the portrait should bear the burden of his days, and he keep the
- unsullied splendour of eternal youth! All his failure had been due to
- that. Better for him that each sin of his life had brought its sure,
- swift penalty along with it. There was purification in punishment. Not
- "Forgive us our sins," but "Smite us for our iniquities" should be the
- prayer of a man to a most just God.
- The curiously carved mirror that Lord Henry had given to him, so many
- years ago now, was standing on the table, and the white-limbed Cupids
- laughed round it as of old. He took it up, as he had done on that night
- of horror, when he had first noted the change in the fatal picture, and
- with wild, tear-dimmed eyes looked into its polished shield. Once, some
- one who had terribly loved him had written to him a mad letter, ending
- with these idolatrous words: "The world is changed because you are made
- of ivory and gold. The curves of your lips rewrite history." The phrases
- came back to his memory, and he repeated them over and over to himself.
- Then he loathed his own beauty, and, flinging the mirror on the floor,
- crushed it into silver splinters beneath his heel. It was his beauty
- that had ruined him, his beauty and the youth that he had prayed for.
- But for those two things, his life might have been free from stain. His
- beauty had been to him but a mask, his youth but a mockery. What was
- youth at best? A green, an unripe time, a time of shallow moods and
- sickly thoughts. Why had he worn its livery? Youth had spoiled him.
- It was better not to think of the past. Nothing could alter that. It was
- of himself, and of his own future, that he had to think. James Vane was
- hidden in a nameless grave in Selby churchyard. Alan Campbell had shot
- himself one night in his laboratory, but had not revealed the secret
- that he had been forced to know. The excitement, such as it was, over
- Basil Hallward's disappearance would soon pass away. It was already
- waning. He was perfectly safe there. Nor, indeed, was it the death of
- Basil Hallward that weighed most upon his mind. It was the living death
- of his own soul that troubled him. Basil had painted the portrait that
- had marred his life. He could not forgive him that. It was the portrait
- that had done everything. Basil had said things to him that were
- unbearable, and that he had yet borne with patience. The murder had been
- simply the madness of a moment. As for Alan Campbell, his suicide had
- been his own act. He had chosen to do it. It was nothing to him.
- A new life! That was what he wanted. That was what he was waiting for.
- Surely he had begun it already. He had spared one innocent thing, at any
- rate. He would never again tempt innocence. He would be good.
- As he thought of Hetty Merton, he began to wonder if the portrait in the
- locked room had changed. Surely it was not still so horrible as it had
- been? Perhaps if his life became pure, he would be able to expel every
- sign of evil passion from the face. Perhaps the signs of evil had
- already gone away. He would go and look.
- He took the lamp from the table and crept upstairs. As he unbarred the
- door a smile of joy flitted across his strangely young-looking face and
- lingered for a moment about his lips. Yes, he would be good, and the
- hideous thing that he had hidden away would no longer be a terror to
- him. He felt as if the load had been lifted from him already.
- He went in quietly, locking the door behind him, as was his custom, and
- dragged the purple hanging from the portrait. A cry of pain and
- indignation broke from him. He could see no change, save that in the
- eyes there was a look of cunning, and in the mouth the curved wrinkle of
- the hypocrite. The thing was still loathsome--more loathsome, if
- possible, than before--and the scarlet dew that spotted the hand seemed
- brighter, and more like blood newly spilt. Then he trembled. Had it been
- merely vanity that had made him do his one good deed? Or the desire for
- a new sensation, as Lord Henry had hinted, with his mocking laugh? Or
- that passion to act a part that sometimes makes us do things finer than
- we are ourselves? Or, perhaps, all these? And why was the red stain
- larger than it had been? It seemed to have crept like a horrible disease
- over the wrinkled fingers. There was blood on the painted feet, as
- though the thing had dripped--blood even on the hand that had not held
- the knife. Confess? Did it mean that he was to confess? To give himself
- up, and be put to death? He laughed. He felt that the idea was
- monstrous. Besides, even if he did confess, who would believe him? There
- was no trace of the murdered man anywhere. Everything belonging to him
- had been destroyed. He himself had burned what had been below-stairs.
- The world would simply say that he was mad. They would shut him up if he
- persisted in his story.... Yet it was his duty to confess, to suffer
- public shame, and to make public atonement. There was a God who called
- upon men to tell their sins to earth as well as to heaven. Nothing that
- he could do would cleanse him till he had told his own sin. His sin? He
- shrugged his shoulders. The death of Basil Hallward seemed very little
- to him. He was thinking of Hetty Merton. For it was an unjust mirror,
- this mirror of his soul that he was looking at. Vanity? Curiosity?
- Hypocrisy? Had there been nothing more in his renunciation than that?
- There had been something more. At least he thought so. But who could
- tell?... No. There had been nothing more. Through vanity he had spared
- her. In hypocrisy he had worn the mask of goodness. For curiosity's
- sake he had tried the denial of self. He recognised that now.
- But this murder--was it to dog him all his life? Was he always to be
- burdened by his past? Was he really to confess? Never. There was only
- one bit of evidence left against him. The picture itself--that was
- evidence. He would destroy it. Why had he kept it so long? Once it had
- given him pleasure to watch it changing and growing old. Of late he had
- felt no such pleasure. It had kept him awake at night. When he had been
- away, he had been filled with terror lest other eyes should look upon
- it. It had brought melancholy across his passions. Its mere memory had
- marred many moments of joy. It had been like conscience to him. Yes, it
- had been conscience. He would destroy it.
- He looked round, and saw the knife that had stabbed Basil Hallward. He
- had cleaned it many times, till there was no stain left upon it. It was
- bright, and glistened. As it had killed the painter, so it would kill
- the painter's work, and all that that meant. It would kill the past, and
- when that was dead he would be free. It would kill this monstrous
- soul-life, and, without its hideous warnings, he would be at peace. He
- seized the thing, and stabbed the picture with it.
- There was a cry heard, and a crash. The cry was so horrible in its agony
- that the frightened servants woke, and crept out of their rooms. Two
- gentlemen, who were passing in the Square below, stopped, and looked up
- at the great house. They walked on till they met a policeman, and
- brought him back. The man rang the bell several times, but there was no
- answer. Except for a light in one of the top windows, the house was all
- dark. After a time, he went away and stood in an adjoining portico and
- watched.
- "Whose house is that, constable?" asked the elder of the two gentlemen.
- "Mr. Dorian Gray's, sir," answered the policeman.
- They looked at each other, as they walked away and sneered. One of them
- was Sir Henry Ashton's uncle.
- Inside, in the servants' part of the house, the half-clad domestics were
- talking in low whispers to each other. Old Mrs. Leaf was crying and
- wringing her hands. Francis was as pale as death.
- After about a quarter of an hour, he got the coachman and one of the
- footmen and crept upstairs. They knocked, but there was no reply. They
- called out. Everything was still. Finally, after vainly trying to force
- the door, they got on the roof, and dropped down on to the balcony. The
- windows yielded easily; their bolts were old.
- When they entered they found, hanging upon the wall, a splendid portrait
- of their master as they had last seen him, in all the wonder of his
- exquisite youth and beauty. Lying on the floor was a dead man, in
- evening dress, with a knife in his heart. He was withered, wrinkled, and
- loathsome of visage. It was not till they had examined the rings that
- they recognised who it was.
- THE END
- * * *
- BIBLIOGRAPHICAL NOTE
- PIRATED EDITIONS
- Owing to the number of unauthorised editions of "THE PICTURE OF DORIAN
- GRAY" issued at various times both in America and on the Continent of
- Europe, it has become necessary to indicate which are the only
- authorised editions of Oscar Wilde's masterpiece.
- Many of the pirated editions are incomplete in that they omit the
- Preface and seven additional chapters which were first published in the
- London edition of 1891. In other cases certain passages have been
- mutilated, and faulty spellings and misprints are numerous.
- AUTHORISED EDITIONS
- (I) First published in _Lippincott's Monthly Magazine_, July, 1890.
- London: Ward, Lock & Co. _Copyrighted in London_.
- Published _simultaneously_ in America. Philadelphia: J.-B. Lippincott
- Co. _Copyrighted in the United States of America_.
- (II) A Preface to "Dorian Gray." _Fortnightly Review_, March 1, 1891.
- London: Chapman & Hall. (_All rights reserved._)
- (III) With the Preface and Seven additional chapters. London, New York,
- and Melbourne: Ward, Lock & Co. (n. d.).
- (Of this edition 250 copies were issued on L.P., _dated_ 1891.)
- (IV) The same. London, New York, and Melbourne: Ward, Lock & Bowden. (n.
- d.).
- (Published 1894 or 1895.) See Stuart Mason's "Art and Morality" (page
- 153).
- THE FOLLOWING EDITIONS
- were issued by Charles Carrington, _Publisher and Literary Agent_, late
- of 13 Faubourg Montmartre, Paris, and 10 _Rue de la Tribune_, BRUSSELS
- (Belgium), to whom the Copyright belongs.
- (V) Small 8vo, vii 334 pages, printed on English antique wove paper,
- silk-cloth boards. 500 copies, 1901.
- (VI) The same, vii 327 pages, silk-cloth boards. 500 copies, 1905.
- Of this edition 100 copies were issued on hand-made paper.
- (VII) 4to, vi 312 pages, broad margins, claret-coloured paper wrappers,
- title on label on the outside. 250 copies. Price 10_s_. 6_d_. 1908
- (February).
- (VIII) Cr. 8vo, uniform with Methuen's (London) complete edition of
- Wilde's _Works_. xi 362 pages, printed on hand-made paper, white cloth,
- gilt extra.
- 1000 copies. Price 12_s._ 6_d._ 1908 (April 16).
- Of this edition 80 further copies were printed on Imperial Japanese
- vellum, full vellum binding, gilt extra. Price 42_s_.
- (IX) Illustrated edition. Containing seven fullpaged illustrations by
- Paul Thirlat, engraved on Wood by Eugène Dété (both of Paris), and
- artistically printed by Brendon & Son, Ltd. (of Plymouth), 4to, vi 312
- pages, half parchment bound, with corners, and _fleur-de-lys_ on side.
- 1908-9. Price 15_s._
- (X) Small edition, uniform with Messrs. Methuen's Issue of "Oscar
- Wilde's Works" at same price. 12mo, xii and 352 pages. 2000 copies.
- Bound in green cloth. 1910. Price 5_s._
- It follows from all this that, with the exception of the version in
- _Lippincott's Magazine_ only those editions are authorised to be sold in
- Great Britain and her Colonies which bear the imprimatur of Ward, Lock &
- Co., London, or Charles Carrington, Paris and Brussels; and that all
- other editions, whether American, Continental (_save Carrington's Paris
- editions above specified_) or otherwise, may not be sold within British
- jurisdiction without infringing the _Berne_ law of literary copyright
- and incurring the disagreements that may therefrom result.
- LONDON: SIMPKIN, MARSHALL, HAMILTON, KENT & CO., LIMITED.
- * * *
- To possess a good edition
- of SHAKESPEARE
- is surely the desire of every one.
- Simpkin's
- THIN PAPER EDITION
- of
- Shakespeare
- is a charming Edition, suitable for the pocket
- or bookshelf. Size 6-3/4 × 4 × 3/4 inch thick.
- Printed in large type on a thin but thoroughly
- opaque paper, with photogravure frontispiece
- and title-page to each volume on Japanese vellum.
- The 3 Volumes are
- Comedies, Histories, Tragedies.
- Cloth, 3/- each net. Lambskin, 3/6 each net
- Polished Persian Levant in Case, 15/- net
- 1/4 Vellum, gilt top, in Case, 15/- net
- _To be had from all Booksellers or the Publishers_
- LONDON: SIMPKIN, MARSHALL,
- HAMILTON, KENT & CO., LTD.
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- MANUAL OF BRITISH GRASSES. Crown 8vo. 6/-net
- With an accurate coloured figure of every species, and outline drawings
- of the spikelets and florets of every genus.
- _Ask your Bookseller to show you Gordon's Our Country's Series_.
- LONDON: SIMPKIN, MARSHALL, HAMILTON, KENT & CO., LTD.
- * * *
- Have You
- a friend who loves
- "My Lady Nicotine?"
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- THE SMOKER BOOKS
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- Each book is bound in velvet Persian, tobacco
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- 8vo, 6-1/2 by 4-1/2, Cloth limp, designed end-papers,
- 1/- net.
- Undine, and Aslauga's Knight. By LA MOTTE
- FOUQUÉ. With Illustrations by HAROLD NELSON.
- The Pilgrim's Progress from this World to
- that which is to Come. By JOHN BUNYAN. With
- Illustrations by EDMUND J. SULLIVAN. Two Volumes.
- In Memoriam. By ALFRED, LORD TENNYSON.
- With Illustrations by A. GARTH JONES.
- The Serious Poems of Thomas Hood. With
- Illustrations by H. GRANVILLE FELL.
- A Book of Romantic Ballads. Compiled
- from various sources ranging from the Thirteenth
- Century to the Present Day. With Illustrations by
- REGINALD SAVAGE.
- The Sketch Book. By WASHINGTON IRVING.
- With Illustrations by EDMUND J. SULLIVAN. TWO
- Volumes.
- Rosalynde. By THOMAS LODGE. With Illustrations
- by EDMUND J. SULLIVAN.
- Herrick's Hesperides and Noble Numbers.
- With Illustrations by REGINALD SAVAGE. Two
- Volumes.
- LONDON: SIMPKIN, MARSHALL,
- HAMILTON, KENT & CO., LTD.
- End of Project Gutenberg's The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde
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