- The Project Gutenberg EBook of Twilight in Italy, by D. H. Lawrence
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- Title: Twilight in Italy
- Author: D. H. Lawrence
- Posting Date: August 5, 2012 [EBook #9497]
- Release Date: December, 2005
- First Posted: October 6, 2003
- Language: English
- *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TWILIGHT IN ITALY ***
- Produced by Joshua Hutchinson and PG Distributed Proofreaders
- TWILIGHT IN ITALY
- By D. H. Lawrence
- 1916
- CONTENTS
- THE CRUCIFIX ACROSS THE MOUNTAINS
- ON THE LAGO DI GARDA
- 1 _The Spinner and the Monks_
- 2 _The Lemon Gardens_
- 3 _The Theatre_
- 4 _San Gaudenzio_
- 5 _The Dance_
- 6 _Il Duro_
- 7 _John_
- ITALIANS IN EXILE
- THE RETURN JOURNEY
- _The Crucifix Across the Mountains_
- The imperial road to Italy goes from Munich across the Tyrol, through
- Innsbruck and Bozen to Verona, over the mountains. Here the great
- processions passed as the emperors went South, or came home again from
- rosy Italy to their own Germany.
- And how much has that old imperial vanity clung to the German soul? Did
- not the German kings inherit the empire of bygone Rome? It was not a
- very real empire, perhaps, but the sound was high and splendid.
- Maybe a certain Grössenwahn is inherent in the German nature. If only
- nations would realize that they have certain natural characteristics, if
- only they could understand and agree to each other's particular nature,
- how much simpler it would all be.
- The imperial procession no longer crosses the mountains, going South.
- That is almost forgotten, the road has almost passed out of mind. But
- still it is there, and its signs are standing.
- The crucifixes are there, not mere attributes of the road, yet still
- having something to do with it. The imperial processions, blessed by the
- Pope and accompanied by the great bishops, must have planted the holy
- idol like a new plant among the mountains, there where it multiplied and
- grew according to the soil, and the race that received it.
- As one goes among the Bavarian uplands and foothills, soon one realizes
- here is another land, a strange religion. It is a strange country,
- remote, out of contact. Perhaps it belongs to the forgotten, imperial
- processions.
- Coming along the clear, open roads that lead to the mountains, one
- scarcely notices the crucifixes and the shrines. Perhaps one's interest
- is dead. The crucifix itself is nothing, a factory-made piece of
- sentimentalism. The soul ignores it.
- But gradually, one after another looming shadowily under their hoods,
- the crucifixes seem to create a new atmosphere over the whole of the
- countryside, a darkness, a weight in the air that is so unnaturally
- bright and rare with the reflection from the snows above, a darkness
- hovering just over the earth. So rare and unearthly the light is, from
- the mountains, full of strange radiance. Then every now and again recurs
- the crucifix, at the turning of an open, grassy road, holding a shadow
- and a mystery under its pointed hood.
- I was startled into consciousness one evening, going alone over a marshy
- place at the foot of the mountains, when the sky was pale and unearthly,
- invisible, and the hills were nearly black. At a meeting of the tracks
- was a crucifix, and between the feet of the Christ a handful of withered
- poppies. It was the poppies I saw, then the Christ.
- It was an old shrine, the wood-sculpture of a Bavarian peasant. The
- Christ was a peasant of the foot of the Alps. He had broad cheekbones
- and sturdy limbs. His plain, rudimentary face stared fixedly at the
- hills, his neck was stiffened, as if in resistance to the fact of the
- nails and the cross, which he could not escape. It was a man nailed down
- in spirit, but set stubbornly against the bondage and the disgrace. He
- was a man of middle age, plain, crude, with some of the meanness of the
- peasant, but also with a kind of dogged nobility that does not yield its
- soul to the circumstance. Plain, almost blank in his soul, the
- middle-aged peasant of the crucifix resisted unmoving the misery of his
- position. He did not yield. His soul was set, his will was fixed. He was
- himself, let his circumstances be what they would, his life fixed down.
- Across the marsh was a tiny square of orange-coloured light, from the
- farm-house with the low, spreading roof. I remembered how the man and
- his wife and the children worked on till dark, silent and intent,
- carrying the hay in their arms out of the streaming thunder-rain into
- the shed, working silent in the soaking rain.
- The body bent forward towards the earth, closing round on itself; the
- arms clasped full of hay, clasped round the hay that presses soft and
- close to the breast and the body, that pricks heat into the arms and the
- skin of the breast, and fills the lungs with the sleepy scent of dried
- herbs: the rain that falls heavily and wets the shoulders, so that the
- shirt clings to the hot, firm skin and the rain comes with heavy,
- pleasant coldness on the active flesh, running in a trickle down towards
- the loins, secretly; this is the peasant, this hot welter of physical
- sensation. And it is all intoxicating. It is intoxicating almost like a
- soporific, like a sensuous drug, to gather the burden to one's body in
- the rain, to stumble across the living grass to the shed, to relieve
- one's arms of the weight, to throw down the hay on to the heap, to feel
- light and free in the dry shed, then to return again into the chill,
- hard rain, to stoop again under the rain, and rise to return again with
- the burden.
- It is this, this endless heat and rousedness of physical sensation which
- keeps the body full and potent, and flushes the mind with a blood heat,
- a blood sleep. And this sleep, this heat of physical experience, becomes
- at length a bondage, at last a crucifixion. It is the life and the
- fulfilment of the peasant, this flow of sensuous experience. But at last
- it drives him almost mad, because he cannot escape.
- For overhead there is always the strange radiance of the mountains,
- there is the mystery of the icy river rushing through its pink shoals
- into the darkness of the pine-woods, there is always the faint tang of
- ice on the air, and the rush of hoarse-sounding water.
- And the ice and the upper radiance of snow are brilliant with timeless
- immunity from the flux and the warmth of life. Overhead they transcend
- all life, all the soft, moist fire of the blood. So that a man must
- needs live under the radiance of his own negation.
- There is a strange, clear beauty of form about the men of the Bavarian
- highlands, about both men and women. They are large and clear and
- handsome in form, with blue eyes very keen, the pupil small, tightened,
- the iris keen, like sharp light shining on blue ice. Their large,
- full-moulded limbs and erect bodies are distinct, separate, as if they
- were perfectly chiselled out of the stuff of life, static, cut off.
- Where they are everything is set back, as in a clear frosty air.
- Their beauty is almost this, this strange, clean-cut isolation, as if
- each one of them would isolate himself still further and for ever from
- the rest of his fellows.
- Yet they are convivial, they are almost the only race with the souls of
- artists. Still they act the mystery plays with instinctive fullness of
- interpretation, they sing strangely in the mountain fields, they love
- make-belief and mummery, their processions and religious festivals are
- profoundly impressive, solemn, and rapt.
- It is a race that moves on the poles of mystic sensual delight. Every
- gesture is a gesture from the blood, every expression is a symbolic
- utterance.
- For learning there is sensuous experience, for thought there is myth and
- drama and dancing and singing. Everything is of the blood, of the
- senses. There is no mind. The mind is a suffusion of physical heat, it
- is not separated, it is kept submerged.
- At the same time, always, overhead, there is the eternal, negative
- radiance of the snows. Beneath is life, the hot jet of the blood playing
- elaborately. But above is the radiance of changeless not-being. And life
- passes away into this changeless radiance. Summer and the prolific
- blue-and-white flowering of the earth goes by, with the labour and the
- ecstasy of man, disappears, and is gone into brilliance that hovers
- overhead, the radiant cold which waits to receive back again all that
- which has passed for the moment into being.
- The issue is too much revealed. It leaves the peasant no choice. The
- fate gleams transcendent above him, the brightness of eternal,
- unthinkable not-being. And this our life, this admixture of labour and
- of warm experience in the flesh, all the time it is steaming up to the
- changeless brilliance above, the light of the everlasting snows. This is
- the eternal issue.
- Whether it is singing or dancing or play-acting or physical transport of
- love, or vengeance or cruelty, or whether it is work or sorrow or
- religion, the issue is always the same at last, into the radiant
- negation of eternity. Hence the beauty and completeness, the finality of
- the highland peasant. His figure, his limbs, his face, his motion, it is
- all formed in beauty, and it is all completed. There is no flux nor hope
- nor becoming, all is, once and for all. The issue is eternal, timeless,
- and changeless. All being and all passing away is part of the issue,
- which is eternal and changeless. Therefore there is no becoming and no
- passing away. Everything is, now and for ever. Hence the strange beauty
- and finality and isolation of the Bavarian peasant.
- It is plain in the crucifixes. Here is the essence rendered in sculpture
- of wood. The face is blank and stiff, almost expressionless. One
- realizes with a start how unchanging and conventionalized is the face of
- the living man and woman of these parts, handsome, but motionless as
- pure form. There is also an underlying meanness, secretive, cruel. It is
- all part of the beauty, the pure, plastic beauty. The body also of the
- Christus is stiff and conventionalized, yet curiously beautiful in
- proportion, and in the static tension which makes it unified into one
- clear thing. There is no movement, no possible movement. The being is
- fixed, finally. The whole body is locked in one knowledge, beautiful,
- complete. It is one with the nails. Not that it is languishing or dead.
- It is stubborn, knowing its own undeniable being, sure of the absolute
- reality of the sensuous experience. Though he is nailed down upon an
- irrevocable fate, yet, within that fate he has the power and the delight
- of all sensuous experience. So he accepts the fate and the mystic
- delight of the senses with one will, he is complete and final. His
- sensuous experience is supreme, a consummation of life and death
- at once.
- It is the same at all times, whether it is moving with the scythe on the
- hill-slopes, or hewing the timber, or steering the raft down the river
- which is all effervescent with ice; whether it is drinking in the
- Gasthaus, or making love, or playing some mummer's part, or hating
- steadily and cruelly, or whether it is kneeling in spellbound subjection
- in the incense-filled church, or walking in the strange, dark,
- subject-procession to bless the fields, or cutting the young birch-trees
- for the feast of Frohenleichnam, it is always the same, the dark,
- powerful mystic, sensuous experience is the whole of him, he is mindless
- and bound within the absoluteness of the issue, the unchangeability of
- the great icy not-being which holds good for ever, and is supreme.
- Passing further away, towards Austria, travelling up the Isar, till the
- stream becomes smaller and whiter and the air is colder, the full
- glamour of the northern hills, which are so marvellously luminous and
- gleaming with flowers, wanes and gives way to a darkness, a sense of
- ominousness. Up there I saw another little Christ, who seemed the very
- soul of the place. The road went beside the river, that was seething
- with snowy ice-bubbles, under the rocks and the high, wolf-like
- pine-trees, between the pinkish shoals. The air was cold and hard and
- high, everything was cold and separate. And in a little glass case
- beside the road sat a small, hewn Christ, the head resting on the hand;
- and he meditates, half-wearily, doggedly, the eyebrows lifted in strange
- abstraction, the elbow resting on the knee. Detached, he sits and dreams
- and broods, wearing his little golden crown of thorns, and his little
- cloak of red flannel that some peasant woman has stitched for him.
- No doubt he still sits there, the small, blank-faced Christ in the cloak
- of red flannel, dreaming, brooding, enduring, persisting. There is a
- wistfulness about him, as if he knew that the whole of things was too
- much for him. There was no solution, either, in death. Death did not
- give the answer to the soul's anxiety. That which is, is. It does not
- cease to be when it is cut. Death cannot create nor destroy. What
- is, is.
- The little brooding Christ knows this. What is he brooding, then? His
- static patience and endurance is wistful. What is it that he secretly
- yearns for, amid all the placidity of fate? 'To be, or not to be,' this
- may be the question, but is it not a question for death to answer. It is
- not a question of living or not-living. It is a question of being--to be
- or not to be. To persist or not to persist, that is not the question;
- neither is it to endure or not to endure. The issue, is it eternal
- not-being? If not, what, then, is being? For overhead the eternal
- radiance of the snow gleams unfailing, it receives the efflorescence of
- all life and is unchanged, the issue is bright and immortal, the snowy
- not-being. What, then, is being?
- As one draws nearer to the turning-point of the Alps, towards the
- culmination and the southern slope, the influence of the educated world
- is felt once more. Bavaria is remote in spirit, as yet unattached. Its
- crucifixes are old and grey and abstract, small like the kernel of the
- truth. Further into Austria they become new, they are painted white,
- they are larger, more obtrusive. They are the expressions of a later,
- newer phase, more introspective and self-conscious. But still they are
- genuine expressions of the people's soul.
- Often one can distinguish the work of a particular artist here and there
- in a district. In the Zemm valley, in the heart of the Tyrol, behind
- Innsbruck, there are five or six crucifixes by one sculptor. He is no
- longer a peasant working out an idea, conveying a dogma. He is an
- artist, trained and conscious, probably working in Vienna. He is
- consciously trying to convey a _feeling_, he is no longer striving
- awkwardly to render a truth, a religious fact.
- The chief of his crucifixes stands deep in the Klamm, in the dank gorge
- where it is always half-night. The road runs under the rock and the
- trees, half-way up the one side of the pass. Below, the stream rushes
- ceaselessly, embroiled among great stones, making an endless loud noise.
- The rock face opposite rises high overhead, with the sky far up. So that
- one is walking in a half-night, an underworld. And just below the path,
- where the pack-horses go climbing to the remote, infolded villages, in
- the cold gloom of the pass hangs the large, pale Christ. He is larger
- than life-size. He has fallen forward, just dead, and the weight of the
- full-grown, mature body hangs on the nails of the hands. So the dead,
- heavy body drops forward, sags, as if it would tear away and fall under
- its own weight.
- It is the end. The face is barren with a dead expression of weariness,
- and brutalized with pain and bitterness. The rather ugly, passionate
- mouth is set for ever in the disillusionment of death. Death is the
- complete disillusionment, set like a seal over the whole body and being,
- over the suffering and weariness and the bodily passion.
- The pass is gloomy and damp, the water roars unceasingly, till it is
- almost like a constant pain. The driver of the pack-horses, as he comes
- up the narrow path in the side of the gorge, cringes his sturdy
- cheerfulness as if to obliterate himself, drawing near to the large,
- pale Christ, and he takes his hat off as he passes, though he does not
- look up, but keeps his face averted from the crucifix. He hurries by in
- the gloom, climbing the steep path after his horses, and the large white
- Christ hangs extended above.
- The driver of the pack-horses is afraid. The fear is always there in
- him, in spite of his sturdy, healthy robustness. His soul is not sturdy.
- It is blenched and whitened with fear. The mountains are dark overhead,
- the water roars in the gloom below. His heart is ground between the
- mill-stones of dread. When he passes the extended body of the dead
- Christ he takes off his hat to the Lord of Death. Christ is the Deathly
- One, He is Death incarnate.
- And the driver of the pack-horses acknowledges this deathly Christ as
- supreme Lord. The mountain peasant seems grounded upon fear, the fear of
- death, of physical death. Beyond this he knows nothing. His supreme
- sensation is in physical pain, and in its culmination. His great climax,
- his consummation, is death. Therefore he worships it, bows down before
- it, and is fascinated by it all the while. It is his fulfilment, death,
- and his approach to fulfilment is through physical pain.
- And so these monuments to physical death are found everywhere in the
- valleys. By the same hand that carved the big Christ, a little further
- on, at the end of a bridge, was another crucifix, a small one. This
- Christ had a fair beard, and was thin, and his body was hanging almost
- lightly, whereas the other Christ was large and dark and handsome. But
- in this, as well as in the other, was the same neutral triumph of death,
- complete, negative death, so complete as to be abstract, beyond cynicism
- in its completeness of leaving off.
- Everywhere is the same obsession with the fact of physical pain,
- accident, and sudden death. Wherever a misfortune has befallen a man,
- there is nailed up a little memorial of the event, in propitiation of
- the God of hurt and death. A man is standing up to his waist in water,
- drowning in full stream, his arms in the air. The little painting in its
- wooden frame is nailed to the tree, the spot is sacred to the accident.
- Again, another little crude picture fastened to a rock: a tree, falling
- on a man's leg, smashes it like a stalk, while the blood flies up.
- Always there is the strange ejaculation of anguish and fear, perpetuated
- in the little paintings nailed up in the place of the disaster.
- This is the worship, then, the worship of death and the approaches to
- death, physical violence, and pain. There is something crude and
- sinister about it, almost like depravity, a form of reverting, turning
- back along the course of blood by which we have come.
- Turning the ridge on the great road to the south, the imperial road to
- Rome, a decisive change takes place. The Christs have been taking on
- various different characters, all of them more or less realistically
- conveyed. One Christus is very elegant, combed and brushed and foppish
- on his cross, as Gabriele D'Annunzio's son posing as a martyred saint.
- The martyrdom of this Christ is according to the most polite convention.
- The elegance is very important, and very Austrian. One might almost
- imagine the young man had taken up this striking and original position
- to create a delightful sensation among the ladies. It is quite in the
- Viennese spirit. There is something brave and keen in it, too. The
- individual pride of body triumphs over every difficulty in the
- situation. The pride and satisfaction in the clean, elegant form, the
- perfectly trimmed hair, the exquisite bearing, are more important than
- the fact of death or pain. This may be foolish, it is at the same time
- admirable.
- But the tendency of the crucifix, as it nears the ridge to the south, is
- to become weak and sentimental. The carved Christs turn up their faces
- and roll back their eyes very piteously, in the approved Guido Reni
- fashion. They are overdoing the pathetic turn. They are looking to
- heaven and thinking about themselves, in self-commiseration. Others
- again are beautiful as elegies. It is dead Hyacinth lifted and extended
- to view, in all his beautiful, dead youth. The young, male body droops
- forward on the cross, like a dead flower. It looks as if its only true
- nature were to be dead. How lovely is death, how poignant, real,
- satisfying! It is the true elegiac spirit.
- Then there are the ordinary, factory-made Christs, which are not very
- significant. They are as null as the Christs we see represented in
- England, just vulgar nothingness. But these figures have gashes of red,
- a red paint of blood, which is sensational.
- Beyond the Brenner, I have only seen vulgar or sensational crucifixes.
- There are great gashes on the breast and the knees of the Christ-figure,
- and the scarlet flows out and trickles down, till the crucified body has
- become a ghastly striped thing of red and white, just a sickly thing of
- striped red.
- They paint the rocks at the corners of the tracks, among the mountains;
- a blue and white ring for the road to Ginzling, a red smear for the way
- to St Jakob. So one follows the blue and white ring, or the three
- stripes of blue and white, or the red smear, as the case may be. And the
- red on the rocks, the dabs of red paint, are of just the same colour as
- the red upon the crucifixes; so that the red upon the crucifixes is
- paint, and the signs on the rocks are sensational, like blood.
- I remember the little brooding Christ of the Isar, in his little cloak
- of red flannel and his crown of gilded thorns, and he remains real and
- dear to me, among all this violence of representation.
- '_Couvre-toi de gloire, Tartarin--couvre-toi de flanelle._' Why should
- it please me so that his cloak is of red flannel?
- In a valley near St Jakob, just over the ridge, a long way from the
- railway, there is a very big, important shrine by the roadside. It is a
- chapel built in the baroque manner, florid pink and cream outside, with
- opulent small arches. And inside is the most startling sensational
- Christus I have ever seen. He is a big, powerful man, seated after the
- crucifixion, perhaps after the resurrection, sitting by the grave. He
- sits sideways, as if the extremity were over, finished, the agitation
- done with, only the result of the experience remaining. There is some
- blood on his powerful, naked, defeated body, that sits rather hulked.
- But it is the face which is so terrifying. It is slightly turned over
- the hulked, crucified shoulder, to look. And the look of this face, of
- which the body has been killed, is beyond all expectation horrible. The
- eyes look at one, yet have no seeing in them, they seem to see only
- their own blood. For they are bloodshot till the whites are scarlet, the
- iris is purpled. These red, bloody eyes with their stained pupils,
- glancing awfully at all who enter the shrine, looking as if to see
- through the blood of the late brutal death, are terrible. The naked,
- strong body has known death, and sits in utter dejection, finished,
- hulked, a weight of shame. And what remains of life is in the face,
- whose expression is sinister and gruesome, like that of an unrelenting
- criminal violated by torture. The criminal look of misery and hatred on
- the fixed, violated face and in the bloodshot eyes is almost impossible.
- He is conquered, beaten, broken, his body is a mass of torture, an
- unthinkable shame. Yet his will remains obstinate and ugly, integral
- with utter hatred.
- It is a great shock to find this figure sitting in a handsome, baroque,
- pink-washed shrine in one of those Alpine valleys which to our thinking
- are all flowers and romance, like the picture in the Tate Gallery.
- 'Spring in the Austrian Tyrol' is to our minds a vision of pristine
- loveliness. It contains also this Christ of the heavy body defiled by
- torture and death, the strong, virile life overcome by physical
- violence, the eyes still looking back bloodshot in consummate hate
- and misery.
- The shrine was well kept and evidently much used. It was hung with
- ex-voto limbs and with many gifts. It was a centre of worship, of a sort
- of almost obscene worship. Afterwards the black pine-trees and the river
- of that valley seemed unclean, as if an unclean spirit lived there. The
- very flowers seemed unnatural, and the white gleam on the mountain-tops
- was a glisten of supreme, cynical horror.
- After this, in the populous valleys, all the crucifixes were more or
- less tainted and vulgar. Only high up, where the crucifix becomes
- smaller and smaller, is there left any of the old beauty and religion.
- Higher and higher, the monument becomes smaller and smaller, till in the
- snows it stands out like a post, or a thick arrow stuck barb upwards.
- The crucifix itself is a small thing under the pointed hood, the barb of
- the arrow. The snow blows under the tiny shed, upon the little, exposed
- Christ. All round is the solid whiteness of snow, the awful curves and
- concaves of pure whiteness of the mountain top, the hollow whiteness
- between the peaks, where the path crosses the high, extreme ridge of the
- pass. And here stands the last crucifix, half buried, small and tufted
- with snow. The guides tramp slowly, heavily past, not observing the
- presence of the symbol, making no salute. Further down, every mountain
- peasant lifted his hat. But the guide tramps by without concern. His is
- a professional importance now.
- On a small mountain track on the Jaufen, not far from Meran, was a
- fallen Christus. I was hurrying downhill to escape from an icy wind
- which almost took away my consciousness, and I was looking up at the
- gleaming, unchanging snow-peaks all round. They seemed like blades
- immortal in the sky. So I almost ran into a very old Martertafel. It
- leaned on the cold, stony hillside surrounded by the white peaks in the
- upper air.
- The wooden hood was silver-grey with age, and covered, on the top, with
- a thicket of lichen, which stuck up in hoary tufts. But on the rock at
- the foot of the post was the fallen Christ, armless, who had tumbled
- down and lay in an unnatural posture, the naked, ancient wooden
- sculpture of the body on the naked, living rock. It was one of the old
- uncouth Christs hewn out of bare wood, having the long, wedge-shaped
- limbs and thin flat legs that are significant of the true spirit, the
- desire to convey a religious truth, not a sensational experience.
- The arms of the fallen Christ had broken off at the shoulders, and they
- hung on their nails, as ex-voto limbs hang in the shrines. But these
- arms dangled from the palms, one at each end of the cross, the muscles,
- carved sparely in the old wood, looking all wrong, upside down. And the
- icy wind blew them backwards and forwards, so that they gave a painful
- impression, there in the stark, sterile place of rock and cold. Yet I
- dared not touch the fallen body of the Christ, that lay on its back in
- so grotesque a posture at the foot of the post. I wondered who would
- come and take the broken thing away, and for what purpose.
- _On the Lago di Garda_
- _1_
- THE SPINNER AND THE MONKS
- The Holy Spirit is a Dove, or an Eagle. In the Old Testament it was an
- Eagle; in the New Testament it is a Dove.
- And there are, standing over the Christian world, the Churches of the
- Dove and the Churches of the Eagle. There are, moreover, the Churches
- which do not belong to the Holy Spirit at all, but which are built to
- pure fancy and logic; such as the Wren Churches in London.
- The Churches of the Dove are shy and hidden: they nestle among trees,
- and their bells sound in the mellowness of Sunday; or they are gathered
- into a silence of their own in the very midst of the town, so that one
- passes them by without observing them; they are as if invisible,
- offering no resistance to the storming of the traffic.
- But the Churches of the Eagle stand high, with their heads to the skies,
- as if they challenged the world below. They are the Churches of the
- Spirit of David, and their bells ring passionately, imperiously, falling
- on the subservient world below.
- The Church of San Francesco was a Church of the Dove. I passed it
- several times in the dark, silent little square, without knowing it was
- a church. Its pink walls were blind, windowless, unnoticeable, it gave
- no sign, unless one caught sight of the tan curtain hanging in the door,
- and the slit of darkness beneath. Yet it was the chief church of
- the village.
- But the Church of San Tommaso perched over the village. Coming down the
- cobbled, submerged street, many a time I looked up between the houses
- and saw the thin old church standing above in the light, as if it
- perched on the house-roofs. Its thin grey neck was held up stiffly,
- beyond was a vision of dark foliage, and the high hillside.
- I saw it often, and yet for a long time it never occurred to me that it
- actually existed. It was like a vision, a thing one does not expect to
- come close to. It was there standing away upon the house-tops, against a
- glamour of foliaged hillside. I was submerged in the village, on the
- uneven, cobbled street, between old high walls and cavernous shops and
- the houses with flights of steps.
- For a long time I knew how the day went, by the imperious clangour of
- midday and evening bells striking down upon the houses and the edge of
- the lake. Yet it did not occur to me to ask where these bells rang. Till
- at last my everyday trance was broken in upon, and I knew the ringing of
- the Church of San Tommaso. The church became a living connexion with me.
- So I set out to find it, I wanted to go to it. It was very near. I could
- see it from the piazza by the lake. And the village itself had only a
- few hundreds of inhabitants. The church must be within a stone's throw.
- Yet I could not find it. I went out of the back door of the house, into
- the narrow gully of the back street. Women glanced down at me from the
- top of the flights of steps, old men stood, half-turning, half-crouching
- under the dark shadow of the walls, to stare. It was as if the strange
- creatures of the under-shadow were looking at me. I was of
- another element.
- The Italian people are called 'Children of the Sun'. They might better
- be called 'Children of the Shadow'. Their souls are dark and nocturnal.
- If they are to be easy, they must be able to hide, to be hidden in lairs
- and caves of darkness. Going through these tiny chaotic backways of the
- village was like venturing through the labyrinth made by furtive
- creatures, who watched from out of another element. And I was pale, and
- clear, and evanescent, like the light, and they were dark, and close,
- and constant, like the shadow.
- So I was quite baffled by the tortuous, tiny, deep passages of the
- village. I could not find my way. I hurried towards the broken end of a
- street, where the sunshine and the olive trees looked like a mirage
- before me. And there above me I saw the thin, stiff neck of old San
- Tommaso, grey and pale in the sun. Yet I could not get up to the church,
- I found myself again on the piazza.
- Another day, however, I found a broken staircase, where weeds grew in
- the gaps the steps had made in falling, and maidenhair hung on the
- darker side of the wall. I went up unwillingly, because the Italians
- used this old staircase as a privy, as they will any deep side-passage.
- But I ran up the broken stairway, and came out suddenly, as by a
- miracle, clean on the platform of my San Tommaso, in the
- tremendous sunshine.
- It was another world, the world of the eagle, the world of fierce
- abstraction. It was all clear, overwhelming sunshine, a platform hung in
- the light. Just below were the confused, tiled roofs of the village, and
- beyond them the pale blue water, down below; and opposite, opposite my
- face and breast, the clear, luminous snow of the mountain across the
- lake, level with me apparently, though really much above.
- I was in the skies now, looking down from my square terrace of cobbled
- pavement, that was worn like the threshold of the ancient church. Round
- the terrace ran a low, broad wall, the coping of the upper heaven where
- I had climbed.
- There was a blood-red sail like a butterfly breathing down on the blue
- water, whilst the earth on the near side gave off a green-silver smoke
- of olive trees, coming up and around the earth-coloured roofs.
- It always remains to me that San Tommaso and its terrace hang suspended
- above the village, like the lowest step of heaven, of Jacob's ladder.
- Behind, the land rises in a high sweep. But the terrace of San Tommaso
- is let down from heaven, and does not touch the earth.
- I went into the church. It was very dark, and impregnated with centuries
- of incense. It affected me like the lair of some enormous creature. My
- senses were roused, they sprang awake in the hot, spiced darkness. My
- skin was expectant, as if it expected some contact, some embrace, as if
- it were aware of the contiguity of the physical world, the physical
- contact with the darkness and the heavy, suggestive substance of the
- enclosure. It was a thick, fierce darkness of the senses. But my
- soul shrank.
- I went out again. The pavemented threshold was clear as a jewel, the
- marvellous clarity of sunshine that becomes blue in the height seemed to
- distil me into itself.
- Across, the heavy mountain crouched along the side of the lake, the
- upper half brilliantly white, belonging to the sky, the lower half dark
- and grim. So, then, that is where heaven and earth are divided. From
- behind me, on the left, the headland swept down out of a great,
- pale-grey, arid height, through a rush of russet and crimson, to the
- olive smoke and the water of the level earth. And between, like a blade
- of the sky cleaving the earth asunder, went the pale-blue lake, cleaving
- mountain from mountain with the triumph of the sky.
- Then I noticed that a big, blue-checked cloth was spread on the parapet
- before me, over the parapet of heaven. I wondered why it hung there.
- Turning round, on the other side of the terrace, under a caper-bush that
- hung like a blood-stain from the grey wall above her, stood a little
- grey woman whose fingers were busy. Like the grey church, she made me
- feel as if I were not in existence. I was wandering by the parapet of
- heaven, looking down. But she stood back against the solid wall, under
- the caper-bush, unobserved and unobserving. She was like a fragment of
- earth, she was a living stone of the terrace, sun-bleached. She took no
- notice of me, who was hesitating looking down at the earth beneath. She
- stood back under the sun-bleached solid wall, like a stone rolled down
- and stayed in a crevice.
- Her head was tied in a dark-red kerchief, but pieces of hair, like dirty
- snow, quite short, stuck out over her ears. And she was spinning. I
- wondered so much, that I could not cross towards her. She was grey, and
- her apron, and her dress, and her kerchief, and her hands and her face
- were all sun-bleached and sun-stained, greyey, bluey, browny, like
- stones and half-coloured leaves, sunny in their colourlessness. In my
- black coat, I felt myself wrong, false, an outsider.
- She was spinning, spontaneously, like a little wind. Under her arm she
- held a distaff of dark, ripe wood, just a straight stick with a clutch
- at the end, like a grasp of brown fingers full of a fluff of blackish,
- rusty fleece, held up near her shoulder. And her fingers were plucking
- spontaneously at the strands of wool drawn down from it. And hanging
- near her feet, spinning round upon a black thread, spinning busily, like
- a thing in a gay wind, was her shuttle, her bobbin wound fat with the
- coarse, blackish worsted she was making.
- All the time, like motion without thought, her fingers teased out the
- fleece, drawing it down to a fairly uniform thickness: brown, old,
- natural fingers that worked as in a sleep, the thumb having a long grey
- nail; and from moment to moment there was a quick, downward rub, between
- thumb and forefinger, of the thread that hung in front of her apron, the
- heavy bobbin spun more briskly, and she felt again at the fleece as she
- drew it down, and she gave a twist to the thread that issued, and the
- bobbin spun swiftly.
- Her eyes were clear as the sky, blue, empyrean, transcendent. They were
- dear, but they had no looking in them. Her face was like a
- sun-worn stone.
- 'You are spinning,' I said to her.
- Her eyes glanced over me, making no effort of attention.
- 'Yes,' she said.
- She saw merely a man's figure, a stranger standing near. I was a bit of
- the outside, negligible. She remained as she was, clear and sustained
- like an old stone upon the hillside. She stood short and sturdy, looking
- for the most part straight in front, unseeing, but glancing from time to
- time, with a little, unconscious attention, at the thread. She was
- slightly more animated than the sunshine and the stone and the
- motionless caper-bush above her. Still her fingers went along the strand
- of fleece near her breast.
- 'That is an old way of spinning,' I said.
- 'What?'
- She looked up at me with eyes clear and transcendent as the heavens. But
- she was slightly roused. There was the slight motion of the eagle in her
- turning to look at me, a faint gleam of rapt light in her eyes. It was
- my unaccustomed Italian.
- 'That is an old way of spinning,' I repeated.
- 'Yes--an old way,' she repeated, as if to say the words so that they
- should be natural to her. And I became to her merely a transient
- circumstance, a man, part of the surroundings. We divided the gift of
- speech, that was all.
- She glanced at me again, with her wonderful, unchanging eyes, that were
- like the visible heavens, unthinking, or like two flowers that are open
- in pure clear unconsciousness. To her I was a piece of the environment.
- That was all. Her world was clear and absolute, without consciousness of
- self. She was not self-conscious, because she was not aware that there
- was anything in the universe except _her_ universe. In her universe I
- was a stranger, a foreign _signore_. That I had a world of my own, other
- than her own, was not conceived by her. She did not care.
- So we conceive the stars. We are told that they are other worlds. But
- the stars are the clustered and single gleaming lights in the night-sky
- of our world. When I come home at night, there are the stars. When I
- cease to exist as the microcosm, when I begin to think of the cosmos,
- then the stars are other worlds. Then the macrocosm absorbs me. But the
- macrocosm is not me. It is something which I, the microcosm, am not.
- So that there is something which is unknown to me and which nevertheless
- exists. I am finite, and my understanding has limits. The universe is
- bigger than I shall ever see, in mind or spirit. There is that which
- is not me.
- If I say 'The planet Mars is inhabited,' I do not know what I mean by
- 'inhabited', with reference to the planet Mars. I can only mean that
- that world is not my world. I can only know there is that which is not
- me. I am the microcosm, but the macrocosm is that also which I am not.
- The old woman on the terrace in the sun did not know this. She was
- herself the core and centre to the world, the sun, and the single
- firmament. She knew that I was an inhabitant of lands which she had
- never seen. But what of that! There were parts of her own body which she
- had never seen, which physiologically she could never see. They were
- none the less her own because she had never seen them. The lands she had
- not seen were corporate parts of her own living body, the knowledge she
- had not attained was only the hidden knowledge of her own self. She
- _was_ the substance of the knowledge, whether she had the knowledge in
- her mind or not. There was nothing which was not herself, ultimately.
- Even the man, the male, was part of herself. He was the mobile, separate
- part, but he was none the less herself because he was sometimes severed
- from her. If every apple in the world were cut in two, the apple would
- not be changed. The reality is the apple, which is just the same in the
- half-apple as in the whole.
- And she, the old spinning-woman, was the apple, eternal, unchangeable,
- whole even in her partiality. It was this which gave the wonderful clear
- unconsciousness to her eyes. How could she be conscious of herself when
- all was herself?
- She was talking to me of a sheep that had died, but I could not
- understand because of her dialect. It never occurred to her that I could
- not understand. She only thought me different, stupid. And she talked
- on. The ewes had lived under the house, and a part was divided off for
- the he-goat, because the other people brought their she-goats to be
- covered by the he-goat. But how the ewe came to die I could not
- make out.
- Her fingers worked away all the time in a little, half-fretful movement,
- yet spontaneous as butterflies leaping here and there. She chattered
- rapidly on in her Italian that I could not understand, looking meanwhile
- into my face, because the story roused her somewhat. Yet not a feature
- moved. Her eyes remained candid and open and unconscious as the skies.
- Only a sharp will in them now and then seemed to gleam at me, as if to
- dominate me.
- Her shuttle had caught in a dead chicory plant, and spun no more. She
- did not notice. I stooped and broke off the twigs. There was a glint of
- blue on them yet. Seeing what I was doing, she merely withdrew a few
- inches from the plant. Her bobbin hung free.
- She went on with her tale, looking at me wonderfully. She seemed like
- the Creation, like the beginning of the world, the first morning. Her
- eyes were like the first morning of the world, so ageless.
- Her thread broke. She seemed to take no notice, but mechanically picked
- up the shuttle, wound up a length of worsted, connected the ends from
- her wool strand, set the bobbin spinning again, and went on talking, in
- her half-intimate, half-unconscious fashion, as if she were talking to
- her own world in me.
- So she stood in the sunshine on the little platform, old and yet like
- the morning, erect and solitary, sun-coloured, sun-discoloured, whilst I
- at her elbow, like a piece of night and moonshine, stood smiling into
- her eyes, afraid lest she should deny me existence.
- Which she did. She had stopped talking, did not look at me any more, but
- went on with her spinning, the brown shuttle twisting gaily. So she
- stood, belonging to the sunshine and the weather, taking no more notice
- of me than of the dark-stained caper-bush which hung from the wall above
- her head, whilst I, waiting at her side, was like the moon in the
- daytime sky, overshone, obliterated, in spite of my black clothes.
- 'How long has it taken you to do that much?' I asked.
- She waited a minute, glanced at her bobbin.
- 'This much? I don't know. A day or two.'
- 'But you do it quickly.'
- She looked at me, as if suspiciously and derisively. Then, quite
- suddenly, she started forward and went across the terrace to the great
- blue-and-white checked cloth that was drying on the wall. I hesitated.
- She had cut off her consciousness from me. So I turned and ran away,
- taking the steps two at a time, to get away from her. In a moment I was
- between the walls, climbing upwards, hidden.
- The schoolmistress had told me I should find snowdrops behind San
- Tommaso. If she had not asserted such confident knowledge I should have
- doubted her translation of _perce-neige_. She meant Christmas roses all
- the while.
- However, I went looking for snowdrops. The walls broke down suddenly,
- and I was out in a grassy olive orchard, following a track beside pieces
- of fallen overgrown masonry. So I came to skirt the brink of a steep
- little gorge, at the bottom of which a stream was rushing down its steep
- slant to the lake. Here I stood to look for my snowdrops. The grassy,
- rocky bank went down steep from my feet. I heard water tittle-tattling
- away in deep shadow below. There were pale flecks in the dimness, but
- these, I knew, were primroses. So I scrambled down.
- Looking up, out of the heavy shadow that lay in the cleft, I could see,
- right in the sky, grey rocks shining transcendent in the pure empyrean.
- 'Are they so far up?' I thought. I did not dare to say, 'Am I so far
- down?' But I was uneasy. Nevertheless it was a lovely place, in the cold
- shadow, complete; when one forgot the shining rocks far above, it was a
- complete, shadowless world of shadow. Primroses were everywhere in nests
- of pale bloom upon the dark, steep face of the cleft, and tongues of
- fern hanging out, and here and there under the rods and twigs of bushes
- were tufts of wrecked Christmas roses, nearly over, but still, in the
- coldest corners, the lovely buds like handfuls of snow. There had been
- such crowded sumptuous tufts of Christmas roses everywhere in the
- stream-gullies, during the shadow of winter, that these few remaining
- flowers were hardly noticeable.
- I gathered instead the primroses, that smelled of earth and of the
- weather. There were no snowdrops. I had found the day before a bank of
- crocuses, pale, fragile, lilac-coloured flowers with dark veins,
- pricking up keenly like myriad little lilac-coloured flames among the
- grass, under the olive trees. And I wanted very much to find the
- snowdrops hanging in the gloom. But there were not any.
- I gathered a handful of primroses, then I climbed suddenly, quickly out
- of the deep watercourse, anxious to get back to the sunshine before the
- evening fell. Up above I saw the olive trees in the sunny golden grass,
- and sunlit grey rocks immensely high up. I was afraid lest the evening
- would fall whilst I was groping about like an otter in the damp and the
- darkness, that the day of sunshine would be over.
- Soon I was up in the sunshine again, on the turf under the olive trees,
- reassured. It was the upper world of glowing light, and I was
- safe again.
- All the olives were gathered, and the mills were going night and day,
- making a great, acrid scent of olive oil in preparation, by the lake.
- The little stream rattled down. A mule driver 'Hued!' to his mules on
- the Strada Vecchia. High up, on the Strada Nuova, the beautiful, new,
- military high-road, which winds with beautiful curves up the
- mountain-side, crossing the same stream several times in clear-leaping
- bridges, travelling cut out of sheer slope high above the lake, winding
- beautifully and gracefully forward to the Austrian frontier, where it
- ends: high up on the lovely swinging road, in the strong evening
- sunshine, I saw a bullock wagon moving like a vision, though the
- clanking of the wagon and the crack of the bullock whip responded close
- in my ears.
- Everything was clear and sun-coloured up there, clear-grey rocks
- partaking of the sky, tawny grass and scrub, browny-green spires of
- cypresses, and then the mist of grey-green olives fuming down to the
- lake-side. There was no shadow, only clear sun-substance built up to the
- sky, a bullock wagon moving slowly in the high sunlight, along the
- uppermost terrace of the military road. It sat in the warm stillness of
- the transcendent afternoon.
- The four o'clock steamer was creeping down the lake from the Austrian
- end, creeping under the cliffs. Far away, the Verona side, beyond the
- Island, lay fused in dim gold. The mountain opposite was so still, that
- my heart seemed to fade in its beating as if it too would be still. All
- was perfectly still, pure substance. The little steamer on the floor of
- the world below, the mules down the road cast no shadow. They too were
- pure sun-substance travelling on the surface of the sun-made world.
- A cricket hopped near me. Then I remembered that it was Saturday
- afternoon, when a strange suspension comes over the world. And then,
- just below me, I saw two monks walking in their garden between the
- naked, bony vines, walking in their wintry garden of bony vines and
- olive trees, their brown cassocks passing between the brown vine-stocks,
- their heads bare to the sunshine, sometimes a glint of light as their
- feet strode from under their skirts.
- It was so still, everything so perfectly suspended, that I felt them
- talking. They marched with the peculiar march of monks, a long, loping
- stride, their heads together, their skirts swaying slowly, two brown
- monks with hidden hands, sliding under the bony vines and beside the
- cabbages, their heads always together in hidden converse. It was as if I
- were attending with my dark soul to their inaudible undertone. All the
- time I sat still in silence, I was one with them, a partaker, though I
- could hear no sound of their voices. I went with the long stride of
- their skirted feet, that slid springless and noiseless from end to end
- of the garden, and back again. Their hands were kept down at their
- sides, hidden in the long sleeves, and the skirts of their robes. They
- did not touch each other, nor gesticulate as they walked. There was no
- motion save the long, furtive stride and the heads leaning together. Yet
- there was an eagerness in their conversation. Almost like
- shadow-creatures ventured out of their cold, obscure element, they went
- backwards and forwards in their wintry garden, thinking nobody could
- see them.
- Across, above them, was the faint, rousing dazzle of snow. They never
- looked up. But the dazzle of snow began to glow as they walked, the
- wonderful, faint, ethereal flush of the long range of snow in the
- heavens, at evening, began to kindle. Another world was coming to pass,
- the cold, rare night. It was dawning in exquisite, icy rose upon the
- long mountain-summit opposite. The monks walked backwards and forwards,
- talking, in the first undershadow.
- And I noticed that up above the snow, frail in the bluish sky, a frail
- moon had put forth, like a thin, scalloped film of ice floated out on
- the slow current of the coming night. And a bell sounded.
- And still the monks were pacing backwards and forwards, backwards and
- forwards, with a strange, neutral regularity.
- The shadows were coming across everything, because of the mountains in
- the west. Already the olive wood where I sat was extinguished. This was
- the world of the monks, the rim of pallor between night and day. Here
- they paced, backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards, in the
- neutral, shadowless light of shadow.
- Neither the flare of day nor the completeness of night reached them,
- they paced the narrow path of the twilight, treading in the neutrality
- of the law. Neither the blood nor the spirit spoke in them, only the
- law, the abstraction of the average. The infinite is positive and
- negative. But the average is only neutral. And the monks trod backward
- and forward down the line of neutrality.
- Meanwhile, on the length of mountain-ridge, the snow grew
- rosy-incandescent, like heaven breaking into blossom. After all, eternal
- not-being and eternal being are the same. In the rosy snow that shone in
- heaven over a darkened earth was the ecstasy of consummation. Night and
- day are one, light and dark are one, both the same in the origin and in
- the issue, both the same in the moment, of ecstasy, light fused in
- darkness and darkness fused in light, as in the rosy snow above
- the twilight.
- But in the monks it was not ecstasy, in them it was neutrality, the
- under earth. Transcendent, above the shadowed, twilit earth was the rosy
- snow of ecstasy. But spreading far over us, down below, was the
- neutrality of the twilight, of the monks. The flesh neutralizing the
- spirit, the spirit neutralizing the flesh, the law of the average
- asserted, this was the monks as they paced backward and forward.
- The moon climbed higher, away from the snowy, fading ridge, she became
- gradually herself. Between the roots of the olive tree was a rosy-tipped
- daisy just going to sleep. I gathered it and put it among the frail,
- moony little bunch of primroses, so that its sleep should warm the rest.
- Also I put in some little periwinkles, that were very blue, reminding me
- of the eyes of the old woman.
- The day was gone, the twilight was gone, and the snow was invisible as I
- came down to the side of the lake. Only the moon, white and shining, was
- in the sky, like a woman glorying in her own loveliness as she loiters
- superbly to the gaze of all the world, looking sometimes through the
- fringe of dark olive leaves, sometimes looking at her own superb,
- quivering body, wholly naked in the water of the lake.
- My little old woman was gone. She, all day-sunshine, would have none of
- the moon. Always she must live like a bird, looking down on all the
- world at once, so that it lay all subsidiary to herself, herself the
- wakeful consciousness hovering over the world like a hawk, like a sleep
- of wakefulness. And, like a bird, she went to sleep as the shadows came.
- She did not know the yielding up of the senses and the possession of the
- unknown, through the senses, which happens under a superb moon. The
- all-glorious sun knows none of these yieldings up. He takes his way. And
- the daisies at once go to sleep. And the soul of the old spinning-woman
- also closed up at sunset, the rest was a sleep, a cessation.
- It is all so strange and varied: the dark-skinned Italians ecstatic in
- the night and the moon, the blue-eyed old woman ecstatic in the busy
- sunshine, the monks in the garden below, who are supposed to unite both,
- passing only in the neutrality of the average. Where, then, is the
- meeting-point: where in mankind is the ecstasy of light and dark
- together, the supreme transcendence of the afterglow, day hovering in
- the embrace of the coming night like two angels embracing in the
- heavens, like Eurydice in the arms of Orpheus, or Persephone embraced
- by Pluto?
- Where is the supreme ecstasy in mankind, which makes day a delight and
- night a delight, purpose an ecstasy and a concourse in ecstasy, and
- single abandon of the single body and soul also an ecstasy under the
- moon? Where is the transcendent knowledge in our hearts, uniting sun and
- darkness, day and night, spirit and senses? Why do we not know that the
- two in consummation are one; that each is only part; partial and alone
- for ever; but that the two in consummation are perfect, beyond the range
- of loneliness or solitude?
- _2_
- THE LEMON GARDENS
- The padrone came just as we were drinking coffee after dinner. It was
- two o'clock, because the steamer going down the lake to Desenzano had
- bustled through the sunshine, and the rocking of the water still made
- lights that danced up and down upon the wall among the shadows by
- the piano.
- The signore was very apologetic. I found him bowing in the hall, cap in
- one hand, a slip of paper in the other, protesting eagerly, in broken
- French, against disturbing me.
- He is a little, shrivelled man, with close-cropped grey hair on his
- skull, and a protruding jaw, which, with his gesticulations, always
- makes me think of an ancient, aristocratic monkey. The signore is a
- gentleman, and the last, shrivelled representative of his race. His only
- outstanding quality, according to the villagers, is his avarice.
- _'Mais--mais, monsieur--je crains que--que--que je vous dérange--'_
- He spreads wide his hands and bows, looking up at me with implicit brown
- eyes, so ageless in his wrinkled, monkey's face, like onyx. He loves to
- speak French, because then he feels grand. He has a queer, naïve,
- ancient passion to be grand. As the remains of an impoverished family,
- he is not much better than a well-to-do peasant. But the old spirit is
- eager and pathetic in him.
- He loves to speak French to me. He holds his chin and waits, in his
- anxiety for the phrase to come. Then it stammers forth, a little rush,
- ending in Italian. But his pride is all on edge: we must continue
- in French.
- The hall is cold, yet he will not come into the large room. This is not
- a courtesy visit. He is not here in his quality of gentleman. He is only
- an anxious villager.
- '_Voyez, monsieur--cet--cet--qu'est-ce que--qu'est-ce que veut dire
- cet--cela?_'
- He shows me the paper. It is an old scrap of print, the picture of an
- American patent door-spring, with directions: 'Fasten the spring either
- end up. Wind it up. Never unwind.'
- It is laconic and American. The signore watches me anxiously, waiting,
- holding his chin. He is afraid he ought to understand my English. I
- stutter off into French, confounded by the laconic phrases of the
- directions. Nevertheless, I make it clear what the paper says.
- He cannot believe me. It must say something else as well. He has not
- done anything contrary to these directions. He is most distressed.
- '_Mais, monsieur, la porte--la porte--elle ferme_ pas--_elle s'ouvre_--'
- He skipped to the door and showed me the whole tragic mystery. The door,
- it is shut--_ecco_! He releases the catch, and pouf!--she flies open.
- She flies _open_. It is quite final.
- The brown, expressionless, ageless eyes, that remind me of a monkey's,
- or of onyx, wait for me. I feel the responsibility devolve upon me. I
- am anxious.
- 'Allow me,' I said, 'to come and look at the door.'
- I feel uncomfortably like Sherlock Holmes. The padrone protests--_non,
- monsieur, non, cela vous dérange_--that he only wanted me to translate
- the words, he does not want to disturb me. Nevertheless, we go. I feel I
- have the honour of mechanical England in my hands.
- The Casa di Paoli is quite a splendid place. It is large, pink and
- cream, rising up to a square tower in the centre, throwing off a painted
- loggia at either extreme of the façade. It stands a little way back from
- the road, just above the lake, and grass grows on the bay of cobbled
- pavement in front. When at night the moon shines full on this pale
- façade, the theatre is far outdone in staginess.
- The hall is spacious and beautiful, with great glass doors at either
- end, through which shine the courtyards where bamboos fray the sunlight
- and geraniums glare red. The floor is of soft red tiles, oiled and
- polished like glass, the walls are washed grey-white, the ceiling is
- painted with pink roses and birds. This is half-way between the outer
- world and the interior world, it partakes of both.
- The other rooms are dark and ugly. There is no mistake about their being
- interior. They are like furnished vaults. The red-tiled, polished floor
- in the drawing-room seems cold and clammy, the carved, cold furniture
- stands in its tomb, the air has been darkened and starved to death, it
- is perished.
- Outside, the sunshine runs like birds singing. Up above, the grey rocks
- build the sun-substance in heaven, San Tommaso guards the terrace. But
- inside here is the immemorial shadow.
- Again I had to think of the Italian soul, how it is dark, cleaving to
- the eternal night. It seems to have become so, at the Renaissance, after
- the Renaissance.
- In the Middle Ages Christian Europe seems to have been striving, out of
- a strong, primitive, animal nature, towards the self-abnegation and the
- abstraction of Christ. This brought about by itself a great sense of
- completeness. The two halves were joined by the effort towards the one
- as yet unrealized. There was a triumphant joy in the Whole.
- But the movement all the time was in one direction, towards the
- elimination of the flesh. Man wanted more and more to become purely free
- and abstract. Pure freedom was in pure abstraction. The Word was
- absolute. When man became as the Word, a pure law, then he was free.
- But when this conclusion was reached, the movement broke. Already
- Botticelli painted Aphrodite, queen of the senses, supreme along with
- Mary, Queen of Heaven. And Michelangelo suddenly turned back on the
- whole Christian movement, back to the flesh. The flesh was supreme and
- god-like, in the oneness of the flesh, in the oneness of our physical
- being, we are one with God, with the Father. God the Father created man
- in the flesh, in His own image. Michelangelo swung right back to the old
- Mosaic position. Christ did not exist. To Michelangelo there was no
- salvation in the spirit. There was God the Father, the Begetter, the
- Author of all flesh. And there was the inexorable law of the flesh, the
- Last Judgement, the fall of the immortal flesh into Hell.
- This has been the Italian position ever since. The mind, that is the
- Light; the senses, they are the Darkness. Aphrodite, the queen of the
- senses, she, born of the sea-foam, is the luminousness of the gleaming
- senses, the phosphorescence of the sea, the senses become a conscious
- aim unto themselves; she is the gleaming darkness, she is the luminous
- night, she is goddess of destruction, her white, cold fire consumes and
- does not create.
- This is the soul of the Italian since the Renaissance. In the sunshine
- he basks asleep, gathering up a vintage into his veins which in the
- night-time he will distil into ecstatic sensual delight, the intense,
- white-cold ecstasy of darkness and moonlight, the raucous, cat-like,
- destructive enjoyment, the senses conscious and crying out in their
- consciousness in the pangs of the enjoyment, which has consumed the
- southern nation, perhaps all the Latin races, since the Renaissance.
- It is a lapse back, back to the original position, the Mosaic position,
- of the divinity of the flesh, and the absoluteness of its laws. But also
- there is the Aphrodite-worship. The flesh, the senses, are now
- self-conscious. They know their aim. Their aim is in supreme sensation.
- They seek the maximum of sensation. They seek the reduction of the
- flesh, the flesh reacting upon itself, to a crisis, an ecstasy, a
- phosphorescent transfiguration in ecstasy.
- The mind, all the time, subserves the senses. As in a cat, there is
- subtlety and beauty and the dignity of the darkness. But the fire is
- cold, as in the eyes of a cat, it is a green fire. It is fluid,
- electric. At its maximum it is the white ecstasy of phosphorescence, in
- the darkness, always amid the darkness, as under the black fur of a cat.
- Like the feline fire, it is destructive, always consuming and reducing
- to the ecstasy of sensation, which is the end in itself.
- There is the I, always the I. And the mind is submerged, overcome. But
- the senses are superbly arrogant. The senses are the absolute, the
- god-like. For I can never have another man's senses. These are me, my
- senses absolutely me. And all that is can only come to me through my
- senses. So that all is me, and is administered unto me. The rest, that
- is not me, is nothing, it is something which is nothing. So the Italian,
- through centuries, has avoided our Northern purposive industry, because
- it has seemed to him a form of nothingness.
- It is the spirit of the tiger. The tiger is the supreme manifestation of
- the senses made absolute. This is the
- Tiger, tiger burning bright,
- In the forests of the night
- of Blake. It does indeed burn within the darkness. But the
- _essential_ fate, of the tiger is cold and white, a white ecstasy.
- It is seen in the white eyes of the blazing cat. This is the supremacy
- of the flesh, which devours all, and becomes transfigured into a
- magnificent brindled flame, a burning bush indeed.
- This is one way of transfiguration into the eternal flame, the
- transfiguration through ecstasy in the flesh. Like the tiger in the
- night, I devour all flesh, I drink all blood, until this fuel blazes up
- in me to the consummate fire of the Infinite. In the ecstacy I am
- Infinite, I become again the great Whole, I am a flame of the One White
- Flame which is the Infinite, the Eternal, the Originator, the Creator,
- the Everlasting God. In the sensual ecstasy, having drunk all blood and
- devoured all flesh, I am become again the eternal Fire, I am infinite.
- This is the way of the tiger; the tiger is supreme. His head is
- flattened as if there were some great weight on the hard skull,
- pressing, pressing, pressing the mind into a stone, pressing it down
- under the blood, to serve the blood. It is the subjugate instrument of
- the blood. The will lies above the loins, as it were at the base of the
- spinal column, there is the living will, the living mind of the tiger,
- there in the slender loins. That is the node, there in the spinal cord.
- So the Italian, so the soldier. This is the spirit of the soldier. He,
- too, walks with his consciousness concentrated at the base of the spine,
- his mind subjugated, submerged. The will of the soldier is the will of
- the great cats, the will to ecstasy in destruction, in absorbing life
- into his own life, always his own life supreme, till the ecstasy burst
- into the white, eternal flame, the Infinite, the Flame of the Infinite.
- Then he is satisfied, he has been consummated in the Infinite.
- This is the true soldier, this is the immortal climax of the senses.
- This is the acme of the flesh, the one superb tiger who has devoured all
- living flesh, and now paces backwards and forwards in the cage of its
- own infinite, glaring with blind, fierce, absorbed eyes at that which is
- nothingness to it.
- The eyes of the tiger cannot see, except with the light from within
- itself, by the light of its own desire. Its own white, cold light is so
- fierce that the other warm light of day is outshone, it is not, it does
- not exist. So the white eyes of the tiger gleam to a point of
- concentrated vision, upon that which does not exist. Hence its
- terrifying sightlessness. The something which I know I am is hollow
- space to its vision, offers no resistance to the tiger's looking. It can
- only see of me that which it knows I am, a scent, a resistance, a
- voluptuous solid, a struggling warm violence that it holds overcome, a
- running of hot blood between its Jaws, a delicious pang of live flesh in
- the mouth. This it sees. The rest is not.
- And what is the rest, that which is-not the tiger, that which the tiger
- is-not? What is this?
- What is that which parted ways with the terrific eagle-like angel of the
- senses at the Renaissance? The Italians said, 'We are one in the Father:
- we will go back.' The Northern races said, 'We are one in Christ: we
- will go on.'
- What _is_ the consummation in Christ? Man knows satisfaction when he
- surpasses all conditions and becomes, to himself, consummate in the
- Infinite, when he reaches a state of infinity. In the supreme ecstasy
- of the flesh, the Dionysic ecstasy, he reaches this state. But how does
- it come to pass in Christ?
- It is not the mystic ecstasy. The mystic ecstasy is a special sensual
- ecstasy, it is the senses satisfying themselves with a self-created
- object. It is self-projection into the self, the sensuous self satisfied
- in a projected self.
- Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
- Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for
- theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
- The kingdom of heaven is this Infinite into which we may be consummated,
- then, if we are poor in spirit or persecuted for righteousness' sake.
- Whosoever shall smite thee on the right cheek, turn to him the other
- also.
- Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that
- hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and
- persecute you.
- Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is
- perfect.
- To be perfect, to be one with God, to be infinite and eternal, what
- shall we do? We must turn the other cheek, and love our enemies.
- Christ is the lamb which the eagle swoops down upon, the dove taken by
- the hawk, the deer which the tiger devours.
- What then, if a man come to me with a sword, to kill me, and I do not
- resist him, but suffer his sword and the death from his sword, what am
- I? Am I greater than he, am I stronger than he? Do I know a consummation
- in the Infinite, I, the prey, beyond the tiger who devours me? By my
- non-resistance I have robbed him of his consummation. For a tiger knows
- no consummation unless he kill a violated and struggling prey. There is
- no consummation merely for the butcher, nor for a hyena. I can rob the
- tiger of his ecstasy, his consummation, his very __my non-resistance. In
- my non-resistance the tiger is infinitely destroyed.
- But I, what am I? 'Be ye therefore perfect.' Wherein am I perfect in
- this submission? Is there an affirmation, behind my negation, other than
- the tiger's affirmation of his own glorious infinity?
- What is the Oneness to which I subscribe, I who offer no resistance in
- the flesh?
- Have I only the negative ecstasy of being devoured, of becoming thus
- part of the Lord, the Great Moloch, the superb and terrible God? I have
- this also, this subject ecstasy of consummation. But is there
- nothing else?
- The Word of the tiger is: my senses are supremely Me, and my senses are
- God in me. But Christ said: God is in the others, who are not-me. In all
- the multitude of the others is God, and this is the great God, greater
- than the God which is Me. God is that which is Not-Me.
- And this is the Christian truth, a truth complementary to the pagan
- affirmation: 'God is that which is Me.'
- God is that which is Not-Me. In realizing the Not-Me I am consummated, I
- become infinite. In turning the other cheek I submit to God who is
- greater than I am, other than I am, who is in that which is not me. This
- is the supreme consummation. To achieve this consummation I love my
- neighbour as myself. My neighbour is all that is not me. And if I love
- all this, have I not become one with the Whole, is not my consummation
- complete, am I not one with God, have I not achieved the Infinite?
- After the Renaissance the Northern races continued forward to put into
- practice this religious belief in the God which is Not-Me. Even the idea
- of the saving of the soul was really negative: it was a question of
- escaping damnation. The Puritans made the last great attack on the God
- who is Me. When they beheaded Charles the First, the king by Divine
- Right, they destroyed, symbolically, for ever, the supremacy of the Me
- who am the image of God, the Me of the flesh, of the senses, Me, the
- tiger burning bright, me the king, the Lord, the aristocrat, me who am
- divine because I am the body of God.
- After the Puritans, we have been gathering data for the God who is
- not-me. When Pope said 'Know then thyself, presume not God to scan, The
- proper study of mankind is Man,' he was stating the proposition: A man
- is right, he is consummated, when he is seeking to know Man, the great
- abstract; and the method of knowledge is by the analysis, which is the
- destruction, of the Self. The proposition up to that time was, a man is
- the epitome of the universe. He has only to express himself, to fulfil
- his desires, to satisfy his supreme senses.
- Now the change has come to pass. The individual man is a limited being,
- finite in himself. Yet he is capable of apprehending that which is not
- himself. 'The proper study of mankind is Man.' This is another way of
- saying, 'Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.' Which means, a man
- is consummated in his knowledge of that which is not himself, the
- abstract Man. Therefore the consummation lies in seeking that other, in
- knowing that other. Whereas the Stuart proposition was: 'A man is
- consummated in expressing his own Self.'
- The new spirit developed into the empirical and ideal systems of
- philosophy. Everything that is, is consciousness. And in every man's
- consciousness, Man is great and illimitable, whilst the individual is
- small and fragmentary. Therefore the individual must sink himself in the
- great whole of Mankind.
- This is the spirituality of Shelley, the perfectibility of man. This is
- the way in which we fulfil the commandment, 'Be ye therefore perfect,
- even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.' This is Saint
- Paul's, 'Now I know in part; but then shall I know even as I am known.'
- When a man knows everything and understands everything, then he will be
- perfect, and life will be blessed. He is capable of knowing everything
- and understanding everything. Hence he is justified in his hope of
- infinite freedom and blessedness.
- The great inspiration of the new religion was the inspiration of
- freedom. When I have submerged or distilled away my concrete body and my
- limited desires, when I am like the skylark dissolved in the sky yet
- filling heaven and earth with song, then I am perfect, consummated in
- the Infinite. When I am all that is not-me, then I have perfect liberty,
- I know no limitation. Only I must eliminate the Self.
- It was this religious belief which expressed itself in science. Science
- was the analysis of the outer self, the elementary substance of the
- self, the outer world. And the machine is the great reconstructed
- selfless power. Hence the active worship to which we were given at the
- end of the last century, the worship of mechanized force.
- Still we continue to worship that which is not-me, the Selfless world,
- though we would fain bring in the Self to help us. We are shouting the
- Shakespearean advice to warriors: 'Then simulate the action of the
- tiger.' We are trying to become again the tiger, the supreme, imperial,
- warlike Self. At the same time our ideal is the selfless world
- of equity.
- We continue to give service to the Selfless God, we worship the great
- selfless oneness in the spirit, oneness in service of the great
- humanity, that which is Not-Me. This selfless God is He who works for
- all alike, without consideration. And His image is the machine which
- dominates and cows us, we cower before it, we run to serve it. For it
- works for all humanity alike.
- At the same time, we want to be warlike tigers. That is the horror: the
- confusing of the two ends. We warlike tigers fit ourselves out with
- machinery, and our blazing tiger wrath is emitted through a machine. It
- is a horrible thing to see machines hauled about by tigers, at the mercy
- of tigers, forced to express the tiger. It is a still more horrible
- thing to see tigers caught up and entangled and torn in machinery. It is
- horrible, a chaos beyond chaos, an unthinkable hell.
- The tiger is not wrong, the machine is not wrong, but we, liars,
- lip-servers, duplicate fools, we are unforgivably wrong. We say: 'I will
- be a tiger because I love mankind; out of love for other people, out of
- selfless service to that which is not me, I will even become a tiger.'
- Which is absurd. A tiger devours because it is consummated in devouring,
- it achieves its absolute self in devouring. It does not devour because
- its unselfish conscience bids it do so, for the sake of the other deer
- and doves, or the other tigers.
- Having arrived at the one extreme of mechanical selflessness, we
- immediately embrace the other extreme of the transcendent Self. But we
- try to be both at once. We do not cease to be the one before we become
- the other. We do not even play the roles in turn. We want to be the
- tiger and the deer both in one. Which is just ghastly nothingness. We
- try to say, 'The tiger is the lamb and the lamb is the tiger.' Which is
- nil, nihil, nought.
- The padrone took me into a small room almost contained in the thickness
- of the wall. There the Signora's dark eyes glared with surprise and
- agitation, seeing me intrude. She is younger than the Signore, a mere
- village tradesman's daughter, and, alas, childless.
- It was quite true, the door stood open. Madame put down the screw-driver
- and drew herself erect. Her eyes were a flame of excitement. This
- question of a door-spring that made the door fly open when it should
- make it close roused a vivid spark in her soul. It was she who was
- wrestling with the angel of mechanism.
- She was about forty years old, and flame-like and fierily sad. I think
- she did not know she was sad. But her heart was eaten by some impotence
- in her life.
- She subdued her flame of life to the little padrone. He was strange and
- static, scarcely human, ageless, like a monkey. She supported him with
- her flame, supported his static, ancient, beautiful form, kept it
- intact. But she did not believe in him.
- Now, the Signora Gemma held her husband together whilst he undid the
- screw that fixed the spring. If they had been alone, she would have done
- it, pretending to be under his direction. But since I was there, he did
- it himself; a grey, shaky, highly-bred little gentleman, standing on a
- chair with a long screw-driver, whilst his wife stood behind him, her
- hands half-raised to catch him if he should fall. Yet he was strangely
- absolute, with a strange, intact force in his breeding.
- They had merely adjusted the strong spring to the shut door, and
- stretched it slightly in fastening it to the door-jamb, so that it drew
- together the moment the latch was released, and the door flew open.
- We soon made it right. There was a moment of anxiety, the screw was
- fixed. And the door swung to. They were delighted. The Signora Gemma,
- who roused in me an electric kind of melancholy, clasped her hands
- together in ecstasy as the door swiftly shut itself.
- '_Ecco!_' she cried, in her vibrating, almost warlike woman's voice:
- '_Ecco!_'
- Her eyes were aflame as they looked at the door. She ran forward to try
- it herself. She opened the door expectantly, eagerly. Pouf!--it shut
- with a bang.
- '_Ecco!_' she cried, her voice quivering like bronze, overwrought but
- triumphant.
- I must try also. I opened the door. Pouf! It shut with a bang. We all
- exclaimed with joy.
- Then the Signor di Paoli turned to me, with a gracious, bland, formal
- grin. He turned his back slightly on the woman, and stood holding his
- chin, his strange horse-mouth grinning almost pompously at me. It was an
- affair of gentlemen. His wife disappeared as if dismissed. Then the
- padrone broke into cordial motion. We must drink.
- He would show me the estate. I had already seen the house. We went out
- by the glass doors on the left, into the domestic courtyard.
- It was lower than the gardens round it, and the sunshine came through
- the trellised arches on to the flagstones, where the grass grew fine and
- green in the cracks, and all was deserted and spacious and still. There
- were one or two orange-tubs in the light.
- Then I heard a noise, and there in the corner, among all the pink
- geraniums and the sunshine, the Signora Gemma sat laughing with a baby.
- It was a fair, bonny thing of eighteen months. The Signora was
- concentrated upon the child as he sat, stolid and handsome, in his
- little white cap, perched on a bench picking at the pink geraniums.
- She laughed, bent forward her dark face out of the shadow, swift into a
- glitter of sunshine near the sunny baby, laughing again excitedly,
- making mother-noises. The child took no notice of her. She caught him
- swiftly into the shadow, and they were obscured; her dark head was
- against the baby's wool jacket, she was kissing his neck, avidly, under
- the creeper leaves. The pink geraniums still frilled joyously in
- the sunshine.
- I had forgotten the padrone. Suddenly I turned to him inquiringly.
- 'The Signora's nephew,' he explained, briefly, curtly, in a small voice.
- It was as if he were ashamed, or too deeply chagrined.
- The woman had seen us watching, so she came across the sunshine with the
- child, laughing, talking to the baby, not coming out of her own world to
- us, not acknowledging us, except formally.
- The Signor Pietro, queer old horse, began to laugh and neigh at the
- child, with strange, rancorous envy. The child twisted its face to cry.
- The Signora caught it away, dancing back a few yards from her
- old husband.
- 'I am a stranger,' I said to her across the distance. 'He is afraid of a
- stranger.'
- 'No, no,' she cried back, her eyes flaring up. 'It is the man. He always
- cries at the men.'
- She advanced again, laughing and roused, with the child in her arms. Her
- husband stood as if overcast, obliterated. She and I and the baby, in
- the sunshine, laughed a moment. Then I heard the neighing, forced laugh
- of the old man. He would not be left out. He seemed to force himself
- forward. He was bitter, acrid with chagrin and obliteration, struggling
- as if to assert his own existence. He was nullified.
- The woman also was uncomfortable. I could see she wanted to go away with
- the child, to enjoy him alone, with palpitating, pained enjoyment. It
- was her brother's boy. And the old padrone was as if nullified by her
- ecstasy over the baby. He held his chin, gloomy, fretful, unimportant.
- He was annulled. I was startled when I realized it. It was as though his
- reality were not attested till he had a child. It was as if his _raison
- d'être_ had been to have a son. And he had no children. Therefore he had
- no _raison d'être_. He was nothing, a shadow that vanishes into nothing.
- And he was ashamed, consumed by his own nothingness.
- I was startled. This, then, is the secret of Italy's attraction for us,
- this phallic worship. To the Italian the phallus is the symbol of
- individual creative immortality, to each man his own Godhead. The child
- is but the evidence of the Godhead.
- And this is why the Italian is attractive, supple, and beautiful,
- because he worships the Godhead in the flesh. We envy him, we feel pale
- and insignificant beside him. Yet at the same time we feel superior to
- him, as if he were a child and we adult.
- Wherein are we superior? Only because we went beyond the phallus in the
- search of the Godhead, the creative origin. And we found the physical
- forces and the secrets of science.
- We have exalted Man far above the man who is in each one of us. Our aim
- is a perfect humanity, a perfect and equable human consciousness,
- selfless. And we obtain it in the subjection, reduction, analysis, and
- destruction of the Self. So on we go, active in science and mechanics,
- and social reform.
- But we have exhausted ourselves in the process. We have found great
- treasures, and we are now impotent to use them. So we have said: 'What
- good are these treasures, they are vulgar nothings.' We have said: 'Let
- us go back from this adventuring, let us enjoy our own flesh, like the
- Italian.' But our habit of life, our very constitution, prevents our
- being quite like the Italian. The phallus will never serve us as a
- Godhead, because we do not believe in it: no Northern race does.
- Therefore, either we set ourselves to serve our children, calling them
- 'the future', or else we turn perverse and destructive, give ourselves
- joy in the destruction of the flesh.
- The children are not the future. The living truth is the future. Time
- and people do not make the future. Retrogression is not the future.
- Fifty million children growing up purposeless, with no purpose save the
- attainment of their own individual desires, these are not the future,
- they are only a disintegration of the past. The future is in living,
- growing truth, in advancing fulfilment.
- But it is no good. Whatever we do, it is within the greater will towards
- self-reduction and a perfect society, analysis on the one hand, and
- mechanical construction on the other. This will dominates us as a whole,
- and until the whole breaks down, the will must persist. So that now,
- continuing in the old, splendid will for a perfect selfless humanity, we
- have become inhuman and unable to help ourselves, we are but attributes
- of the great mechanized society we have created on our way to
- perfection. And this great mechanized society, being selfless, is
- pitiless. It works on mechanically and destroys us, it is our master
- and our God.
- It is past the time to leave off, to cease entirely from what we are
- doing, and from what we have been doing for hundreds of years. It is
- past the time to cease seeking one Infinite, ignoring, striving to
- eliminate the other. The Infinite is twofold, the Father and the Son,
- the Dark and the Light, the Senses and the Mind, the Soul and the
- Spirit, the self and the not-self, the Eagle and the Dove, the Tiger and
- the Lamb. The consummation of man is twofold, in the Self and in
- Selflessness. By great retrogression back to the source of darkness in
- me, the Self, deep in the senses, I arrive at the Original, Creative
- Infinite. By projection forth from myself, by the elimination of my
- absolute sensual self, I arrive at the Ultimate Infinite, Oneness in the
- Spirit. They are two Infinites, twofold approach to God. And man must
- know both.
- But he must never confuse them. They are eternally separate. The lion
- shall never lie down with the lamb. The lion eternally shall devour the
- lamb, the lamb eternally shall be devoured. Man knows the great
- consummation in the flesh, the sensual ecstasy, and that is eternal.
- Also the spiritual ecstasy of unanimity, that is eternal. But the two
- are separate and never to be confused. To neutralize the one with the
- other is unthinkable, an abomination. Confusion is horror and
- nothingness.
- The two Infinites, negative and positive, they are always related, but
- they are never identical. They are always opposite, but there exists a
- relation between them. This is the Holy Ghost of the Christian Trinity.
- And it is this, the relation which is established between the two
- Infinites, the two natures of God, which we have transgressed,
- forgotten, sinned against. The Father is the Father, and the Son is the
- Son. I may know the Son and deny the Father, or know the Father and deny
- the Son. But that which I may never deny, and which I have denied, is
- the Holy Ghost which relates the dual Infinites into One Whole, which
- relates and keeps distinct the dual natures of God. To say that the two
- are one, this is the inadmissible lie. The two are related, by the
- intervention of the Third, into a Oneness.
- There are two ways, there is not only One. There are two opposite ways
- to consummation. But that which relates them, like the base of the
- triangle, this is the constant, the Absolute, this makes the Ultimate
- Whole. And in the Holy Spirit I know the Two Ways, the Two Infinites,
- the Two Consummations. And knowing the Two, I admit the Whole. But
- excluding One, I exclude the Whole. And confusing the two, I make
- nullity nihil.
- '_Mais_,' said the Signore, starting from his scene of ignominy, where
- his wife played with another man's child, '_mais--voulez-vous vous
- promener dans mes petites terres?_'
- It came out fluently, he was so much roused in self-defence and
- self-assertion.
- We walked under the pergola of bony vine-stocks, secure in the sunshine
- within the walls, only the long mountain, parallel with us, looking in.
- I said how I liked the big vine-garden, I asked when it ended. The pride
- of the padrone came back with a click. He pointed me to the terrace, to
- the great shut lemon-houses above. They were all his. But--he shrugged
- his Italian shoulders--it was nothing, just a little garden, _vous
- savez, monsieur_. I protested it was beautiful, that I loved it, and
- that it seemed to me _very_ large indeed. He admitted that today,
- perhaps, it was beautiful.
- '_Perchè--parce que--il fait un tempo--così--très bell'--très beau,
- ecco!_'
- He alighted on the word _beau_ hurriedly, like a bird coming to ground
- with a little bounce.
- The terraces of the garden are held up to the sun, the sun falls full
- upon them, they are like a vessel slanted up, to catch the superb, heavy
- light. Within the walls we are remote, perfect, moving in heavy spring
- sunshine, under the bony avenue of vines. The padrone makes little
- exclamatory noises that mean nothing, and teaches me the names of
- vegetables. The land is rich and black.
- Opposite us, looking down on our security, is the long, arched mountain
- of snow. We climbed one flight of steps, and we could see the little
- villages on the opposite side of the lake. We climbed again, and could
- see the water rippling.
- We came to a great stone building that I had thought was a storehouse,
- for open-air storage, because the walls are open halfway up, showing the
- darkness inside and the corner pillar very white and square and distinct
- in front of it.
- Entering carelessly into the dimness, I started, for at my feet was a
- great floor of water, clear and green in its obscurity, going down
- between the walls, a reservoir in the gloom. The Signore laughed at my
- surprise. It was for irrigating the land, he said. It stank, slightly,
- with a raw smell; otherwise, I said, what a wonderful bath it would
- make. The old Signore gave his little neighing laugh at the idea.
- Then we climbed into a great loft of leaves, ruddy brown, stored in a
- great bank under the roof, seeming to give off a little red heat, as
- they gave off the lovely perfume of the hills. We passed through, and
- stood at the foot of the lemon-house. The big, blind building rose high
- in the sunshine before us.
- All summer long, upon the mountain slopes steep by the lake, stands the
- rows of naked pillars rising out of the green foliage like ruins of
- temples: white, square pillars of masonry, standing forlorn in their
- colonnades and squares, rising up the mountain-sides here and there, as
- if they remained from some great race that had once worshipped here. And
- still, in the winter, some are seen, standing away in lonely places
- where the sun streams full, grey rows of pillars rising out of a broken
- wall, tier above tier, naked to the sky, forsaken.
- They are the lemon plantations, and the pillars are to support the heavy
- branches of the trees, but finally to act as scaffolding of the great
- wooden houses that stand blind and ugly, covering the lemon trees in
- the winter.
- In November, when cold winds came down and snow had fallen on the
- mountains, from out of the storehouses the men were carrying timber, and
- we heard the clang of falling planks. Then, as we walked along the
- military road on the mountain-side, we saw below, on the top of the
- lemon gardens, long, thin poles laid from pillar to pillar, and we heard
- the two men talking and singing as they walked across perilously,
- placing the poles. In their clumsy zoccoli they strode easily across,
- though they had twenty or thirty feet to fall if they slipped. But the
- mountain-side, rising steeply, seemed near, and above their heads the
- rocks glowed high into the sky, so that the sense of elevation must have
- been taken away. At any rate, they went easily from pillar-summit to
- pillar-summit, with a great cave of space below. Then again was the
- rattle and clang of planks being laid in order, ringing from the
- mountain-side over the blue lake, till a platform of timber, old and
- brown, projected from the mountain-side, a floor when seen from above, a
- hanging roof when seen from below. And we, on the road above, saw the
- men sitting easily on this flimsy hanging platform, hammering the
- planks. And all day long the sound of hammering echoed among the rocks
- and olive woods, and came, a faint, quick concussion, to the men on the
- boats far out. When the roofs were on they put in the fronts, blocked in
- between the white pillars withhold, dark wood, in roughly made panels.
- And here and there, at irregular intervals, was a panel of glass, pane
- overlapping pane in the long strip of narrow window. So that now these
- enormous, unsightly buildings bulge out on the mountain-sides, rising in
- two or three receding tiers, blind, dark, sordid-looking places.
- In the morning I often lie in bed and watch the sunrise. The lake lies
- dim and milky, the mountains are dark blue at the back, while over them
- the sky gushes and glistens with light. At a certain place on the
- mountain ridge the light burns gold, seems to fuse a little groove on
- the hill's rim. It fuses and fuses at this point, till of a sudden it
- comes, the intense, molten, living light. The mountains melt suddenly,
- the light steps down, there is a glitter, a spangle, a clutch of
- spangles, a great unbearable sun-track flashing across the milky lake,
- and the light falls on my face. Then, looking aside, I hear the little
- slotting noise which tells me they are opening the lemon gardens, a long
- panel here and there, a long slot of darkness at irregular intervals
- between the brown wood and the glass stripes.
- '_Voulez-vous_'--the Signore bows me in with outstretched
- hand--'_voulez-vous entrer, monsieur?_'
- I went into the lemon-house, where the poor threes seem to mope in the
- darkness. It is an immense, dark, cold place. Tall lemon trees, heavy
- with half-visible fruit, crowd together, and rise in the gloom. They
- look like ghosts in the darkness of the underworld, stately, and as if
- in life, but only grand shadows of themselves. And lurking here and
- there, I see one of the pillars, But he, too, seems a shadow, not one of
- the dazzling white fellows I knew. Here we are trees, men, pillars, the
- dark earth, the sad black paths, shut in in this enormous box. It is
- true, there are long strips of window and slots of space, so that the
- front is striped, and an occasional beam of light fingers the leaves of
- an enclosed tree and the sickly round lemons. But it is nevertheless
- very gloomy.
- 'But it is much colder in here than outside,' I said.
- 'Yes,' replied the Signore, 'now. But at night--I _think_--'
- I almost wished it were night to try. I wanted to imagine the trees
- cosy. They seemed now in the underworld. Between the lemon trees, beside
- the path, were little orange trees, and dozens of oranges hanging like
- hot coals in the twilight. When I warm my hands at them the Signore
- breaks me off one twig after another, till I have a bunch of burning
- oranges among dark leaves, a heavy bouquet. Looking down the Hades of
- the lemon-house, the many ruddy-clustered oranges beside the path remind
- me of the lights of a village along the lake at night, while the pale
- lemons above are the stars. There is a subtle, exquisite scent of lemon
- flowers. Then I notice a citron. He hangs heavy and bloated upon so
- small a tree, that he seems a dark green enormity. There is a great host
- of lemons overhead, half-visible, a swarm of ruddy oranges by the paths,
- and here and there a fat citron. It is almost like being under the sea.
- At the corners of the path were round little patches of ash and stumps
- of charred wood, where fires had been kindled inside the house on cold
- nights. For during the second and third weeks in January the snow came
- down so low on the mountains that, after climbing for an hour, I found
- myself in a snow lane, and saw olive orchards on lawns of snow.
- The padrone says that all lemons and sweet oranges are grafted on a
- bitter-orange stock. The plants raised from seed, lemon and sweet
- orange, fell prey to disease, so the cultivators found it safe only to
- raise the native bitter orange, and then graft upon it.
- And the maestra--she is the schoolmistress, who wears black gloves while
- she teaches us Italian--says that the lemon was brought by St Francis of
- Assisi, who came to the Garda here and founded a church and a monastery.
- Certainly the church of San Francesco is very old and dilapidated, and
- its cloisters have some beautiful and original carvings of leaves and
- fruit upon the pillars, which seem to connect San Francesco with the
- lemon. I imagine him wandering here with a lemon in his pocket. Perhaps
- he made lemonade in the hot summer. But Bacchus had been before him in
- the drink trade.
- Looking at his lemons, the Signore sighed. I think he hates them. They
- are leaving him in the lurch. They are sold retail at a halfpenny each
- all the year round. 'But that is as dear, or dearer, than in England,' I
- say. 'Ah, but,' says the maestra, 'that is because your lemons are
- outdoor fruit from Sicily. _Però_--one of our lemons is as good as _two_
- from elsewhere.'
- It is true these lemons have an exquisite fragrance and perfume, but
- whether their force as lemons is double that of an ordinary fruit is a
- question. Oranges are sold at fourpence halfpenny the kilo--it comes
- about five for twopence, small ones. The citrons are sold also by weight
- in Salò for the making of that liqueur known as 'Cedro'. One citron
- fetches sometimes a shilling or more, but then the demand is necessarily
- small. So that it is evident, from these figures, the Lago di Garda
- cannot afford to grow its lemons much longer. The gardens are already
- many of them in ruins, and still more 'Da Vendere'.
- We went out of the shadow of the lemon-house on to the roof of the
- section below us. When we came to the brink of the roof I sat down. The
- padrone stood behind me, a shabby, shaky little figure on his roof in
- the sky, a little figure of dilapidation, dilapidated as the
- lemon-houses themselves.
- We were always level with the mountain-snow opposite. A film of pure
- blue was on the hills to the right and the left. There had been a wind,
- but it was still now. The water breathed an iridescent dust on the far
- shore, where the villages were groups of specks.
- On the low level of the world, on the lake, an orange-sailed boat leaned
- slim to the dark-blue water, which had flecks of foam. A woman went
- down-hill quickly, with two goats and a sheep. Among the olives a man
- was whistling.
- '_Voyez_,' said the padrone, with distant, perfect melancholy. 'There
- was once a lemon garden also there--you see the short pillars, cut off
- to make a pergola for the vine. Once there were twice as many lemons as
- now. Now we must have vine instead. From that piece of land I had two
- hundred lire a year, in lemons. From the vine I have only eighty.'
- 'But wine is a valuable crop,' I said.
- 'Ah--_così-così_! For a man who grows much. For me--_poco, poco--peu_.'
- Suddenly his face broke into a smile of profound melancholy, almost a
- grin, like a gargoyle. It was the real Italian melancholy, very
- deep, static.
- '_Vous voyez, monsieur_--the lemon, it is all the year, all the year.
- But the vine--one crop--?'
- He lifts his shoulders and spreads his hands with that gesture of
- finality and fatality, while his face takes the blank, ageless look of
- misery, like a monkey's. There is no hope. There is the present. Either
- that is enough, the present, or there is nothing.
- I sat and looked at the lake. It was beautiful as paradise, as the first
- creation. On the shores were the ruined lemon-pillars standing out in
- melancholy, the clumsy, enclosed lemon-houses seemed ramshackle, bulging
- among vine stocks and olive trees. The villages, too, clustered upon
- their churches, seemed to belong to the past. They seemed to be
- lingering in bygone centuries.
- 'But it is very beautiful,' I protested. 'In England--'
- 'Ah, in England,' exclaimed the padrone, the same ageless, monkey-like
- grin of fatality, tempered by cunning, coming on his face, 'in England
- you have the wealth--_les richesses_--you have the mineral coal and the
- machines, _vous savez_. Here we have the sun--'
- He lifted his withered hand to the sky, to the wonderful source of that
- blue day, and he smiled, in histrionic triumph. But his triumph was only
- histrionic. The machines were more to his soul than the sun. He did not
- know these mechanisms, their great, human-contrived, inhuman power, and
- he wanted to know them. As for the sun, that is common property, and no
- man is distinguished by it. He wanted machines, machine production,
- money, and human power. He wanted to know the joy of man who has got the
- earth in his grip, bound it up with railways, burrowed it with iron
- fingers, subdued it. He wanted this last triumph of the ego, this last
- reduction. He wanted to go where the English have gone, beyond the Self,
- into the great inhuman Not Self, to create the great unliving creators,
- the machines, out of the active forces of nature that existed
- before flesh.
- But he is too old. It remains for the young Italian to embrace his
- mistress, the machine.
- I sat on the roof of the lemon-house, with the lake below and the snowy
- mountain opposite, and looked at the ruins on the old, olive-fuming
- shores, at all the peace of the ancient world still covered in sunshine,
- and the past seemed to me so lovely that one must look towards it,
- backwards, only backwards, where there is peace and beauty and no more
- dissonance.
- I thought of England, the great mass of London, and the black, fuming,
- laborious Midlands and north-country. It seemed horrible. And yet, it
- was better than the padrone, this old, monkey-like cunning of fatality.
- It is better to go forward into error than to stay fixed inextricably
- in the past.
- Yet what should become of the world? There was London and the industrial
- counties spreading like a blackness over all the world, horrible, in the
- end destructive. And the Garda was so lovely under the sky of sunshine,
- it was intolerable. For away, beyond, beyond all the snowy Alps, with
- the iridescence of eternal ice above them, was this England, black and
- foul and dry, with her soul worn down, almost worn away. And England was
- conquering the world with her machines and her horrible destruction of
- natural life. She was conquering the whole world.
- And yet, was she not herself finished in this work? She had had enough.
- She had conquered the natural life to the end: she was replete with the
- conquest of the outer world, satisfied with the destruction of the Self.
- She would cease, she would turn round; or else expire.
- If she still lived, she would begin to build her knowledge into a great
- structure of truth. There it lay, vast masses of rough-hewn knowledge,
- vast masses of machines and appliances, vast masses of ideas and
- methods, and nothing done with it, only teeming swarms of disintegrated
- human beings seething and perishing rapidly away amongst it, till it
- seems as if a world will be left covered with huge ruins, and scored by
- strange devices of industry, and quite dead, the people disappeared,
- swallowed up in the last efforts towards a perfect, selfless society.
- _3_
- THE THEATRE
- During carnival a company is playing in the theatre. On Christmas Day
- the padrone came in with the key of his box, and would we care to see
- the drama? The theatre was small, a mere nothing, in fact; a mere affair
- of peasants, you understand; and the Signor Di Paoli spread his hands
- and put his head on one side, parrot-wise; but we might find a little
- diversion--_un peu de divertiment_. With this he handed me the key.
- I made suitable acknowledgements, and was really impressed. To be handed
- the key of a box at the theatre, so simply and pleasantly, in the large
- sitting-room looking over the grey lake of Christmas Day; it seemed to
- me a very graceful event. The key had a chain and a little shield of
- bronze, on which was beaten out a large figure 8.
- So the next day we went to see _I Spettri_, expecting some good, crude
- melodrama. The theatre is an old church. Since that triumph of the deaf
- and dumb, the cinematograph, has come to give us the nervous excitement
- of speed--grimace agitation, and speed, as of flying atoms, chaos--many
- an old church in Italy has taken a new lease of life.
- This cast-off church made a good theatre. I realized how cleverly it had
- been constructed for the dramatic presentation of religious ceremonies.
- The east end is round, the walls are windowless, sound is well
- distributed. Now everything is theatrical, except the stone floor and
- two pillars at the back of the auditorium, and the slightly
- ecclesiastical seats below.
- There are two tiers of little boxes in the theatre, some forty in all,
- with fringe and red velvet, and lined with dark red paper, quite like
- real boxes in a real theatre. And the padrone's is one of the best. It
- just holds three people.
- We paid our threepence entrance fee in the stone hall and went upstairs.
- I opened the door of Number 8, and we were shut in our little cabin,
- looking down on the world. Then I found the barber, Luigi, bowing
- profusely in a box opposite. It was necessary to make bows all round:
- ah, the chemist, on the upper tier, near the barber; how-do-you-do to
- the padrona of the hotel, who is our good friend, and who sits, wearing
- a little beaver shoulder-cape, a few boxes off; very cold salutation to
- the stout village magistrate with the long brown beard, who leans
- forward in the box facing the stage, while a grouping of faces look out
- from behind him; a warm smile to the family of the Signora Gemma, across
- next to the stage. Then we are settled.
- I cannot tell why I hate the village magistrate. He looks like a family
- portrait by a Flemish artist, he himself weighing down the front of the
- picture with his portliness and his long brown beard, whilst the faces
- of his family are arranged in two groups for the background. I think he
- is angry at our intrusion. He is very republican and self-important. But
- we eclipse him easily, with the aid of a large black velvet hat, and
- black furs, and our Sunday clothes.
- Downstairs the villagers are crowding, drifting like a heavy current.
- The women are seated, by church instinct, all together on the left, with
- perhaps an odd man at the end of a row, beside his wife. On the right,
- sprawling in the benches, are several groups of bersaglieri, in grey
- uniforms and slanting cock's-feather hats; then peasants, fishermen, and
- an odd couple or so of brazen girls taking their places on the
- men's side.
- At the back, lounging against the pillars or standing very dark and
- sombre, are the more reckless spirits of the village. Their black felt
- hats are pulled down, their cloaks are thrown over their mouths, they
- stand very dark and isolated in their moments of stillness, they shout
- and wave to each other when anything occurs.
- The men are clean, their clothes are all clean washed. The rags of the
- poorest porter are always well washed. But it is Sunday tomorrow, and
- they are shaved only on a Sunday. So that they have a week's black
- growth on their chins. But they have dark, soft eyes, unconscious and
- vulnerable. They move and balance with loose, heedless motion upon their
- clattering zoccoli, they lounge with wonderful ease against the wall at
- the back, or against the two pillars, unconscious of the patches on
- their clothes or of their bare throats, that are knotted perhaps with a
- scarlet rag. Loose and abandoned, they lounge and talk, or they watch
- with wistful absorption the play that is going on.
- They are strangely isolated in their own atmosphere, and as if revealed.
- It is as if their vulnerable being was exposed and they have not the wit
- to cover it. There is a pathos of physical sensibility and mental
- inadequacy. Their mind is not sufficiently alert to run with their
- quick, warm senses.
- The men keep together, as if to support each other, the women also are
- together; in a hard, strong herd. It is as if the power, the hardness,
- the triumph, even in this Italian village, were with the women in their
- relentless, vindictive unity.
- That which drives men and women together, the indomitable necessity, is
- like a bondage upon the people. They submit as under compulsion, under
- constraint. They come together mostly in anger and in violence of
- destructive passion. There is no comradeship between men and women, none
- whatsoever, but rather a condition of battle, reserve, hostility.
- On Sundays the uncomfortable, excited, unwilling youth walks for an hour
- with his sweetheart, at a little distance from her, on the public
- highway in the afternoon. This is a concession to the necessity for
- marriage. There is no real courting, no happiness of being together,
- only the roused excitement which is based on a fundamental hostility.
- There is very little flirting, and what there is is of the subtle, cruel
- kind, like a sex duel. On the whole, the men and women avoid each other,
- almost shun each other. Husband and wife are brought together in a
- child, which they both worship. But in each of them there is only the
- great reverence for the infant, and the reverence for fatherhood or
- motherhood, as the case may be; there is no spiritual love.
- In marriage, husband and wife wage the subtle, satisfying war of sex
- upon each other. It gives a profound satisfaction, a profound intimacy.
- But it destroys all joy, all unanimity in action.
- On Sunday afternoons the uncomfortable youth walks by the side of his
- maiden for an hour in the public highway. Then he escapes; as from a
- bondage he goes back to his men companions. On Sunday afternoons and
- evenings the married woman, accompanied by a friend or by a child--she
- dare not go alone, afraid of the strange, terrible sex-war between her
- and the drunken man--is seen leading home the wine-drunken, liberated
- husband. Sometimes she is beaten when she gets home. It is part of the
- process. But there is no synthetic love between men and women, there is
- only passion, and passion is fundamental hatred, the act of love is
- a fight.
- The child, the outcome, is divine. Here the union, the oneness, is
- manifest. Though spirit strove with spirit, in mortal conflict, during
- the sex-passion, yet the flesh united with flesh in oneness. The phallus
- is still divine. But the spirit, the mind of man, this has
- become nothing.
- So the women triumph. They sit down below in the theatre, their
- perfectly dressed hair gleaming, their backs very straight, their heads
- carried tensely. They are not very noticeable. They seem held in
- reserve. They are just as tense and stiff as the men are slack and
- abandoned. Some strange will holds the women taut. They seem like
- weapons, dangerous. There is nothing charming nor winning about them; at
- the best a full, prolific maternity, at the worst a yellow poisonous
- bitterness of the flesh that is like a narcotic. But they are too strong
- for the men. The male spirit, which would subdue the immediate flesh to
- some conscious or social purpose, is overthrown. The woman in her
- maternity is the law-giver, the supreme authority. The authority of the
- man, in work, in public affairs, is something trivial in comparison. The
- pathetic ignominy of the village male is complete on Sunday afternoon,
- on his great day of liberation, when he is accompanied home, drunk but
- sinister, by the erect, unswerving, slightly cowed woman. His drunken
- terrorizing is only pitiable, she is so obviously the more
- constant power.
- And this is why the men must go away to America. It is not the money. It
- is the profound desire to rehabilitate themselves, to recover some
- dignity as men, as producers, as workers, as creators from the spirit,
- not only from the flesh. It is a profound desire to get away from women
- altogether, the terrible subjugation to sex, the phallic worship.
- The company of actors in the little theatre was from a small town away
- on the plain, beyond Brescia. The curtain rose, everybody was still,
- with that profound, naïve attention which children give. And after a few
- minutes I realized that _I Spettri_ was Ibsen's _Ghosts_. The peasants
- and fishermen of the Garda, even the rows of ungovernable children, sat
- absorbed in watching as the Norwegian drama unfolded itself.
- The actors are peasants. The leader is the son of a peasant proprietor.
- He is qualified as a chemist, but is unsettled, vagrant, prefers
- play-acting. The Signer Pietro di Paoli shrugs his shoulders and
- apologizes for their vulgar accent. It is all the same to me. I am
- trying to get myself to rights with the play, which I have just lately
- seen in Munich, perfectly produced and detestable.
- It was such a change from the hard, ethical, slightly mechanized
- characters in the German play, which was as perfect an interpretation as
- I can imagine, to the rather pathetic notion of the Italian peasants,
- that I had to wait to adjust myself.
- The mother was a pleasant, comfortable woman harassed by something, she
- did not quite know what. The pastor was a ginger-haired caricature
- imitated from the northern stage, quite a lay figure. The peasants never
- laughed, they watched solemnly and absorbedly like children. The servant
- was just a slim, pert, forward hussy, much too flagrant. And then the
- son, the actor-manager: he was a dark, ruddy man, broad and thick-set,
- evidently of peasant origin, but with some education now; he was the
- important figure, the play was his.
- And he was strangely disturbing. Dark, ruddy, and powerful, he could not
- be the blighted son of 'Ghosts', the hectic, unsound, northern issue of
- a diseased father. His flashy Italian passion for his half-sister was
- real enough to make one uncomfortable: something he wanted and would
- have in spite of his own soul, something which fundamentally he did
- not want.
- It was this contradiction within the man that made the play so
- interesting. A robust, vigorous man of thirty-eight, flaunting and
- florid as a rather successful Italian can be, there was yet a secret
- sickness which oppressed him. But it was no taint in the blood, it was
- rather a kind of debility in the soul. That which he wanted and would
- have, the sensual excitement, in his soul he did not want it, no, not at
- all. And yet he must act from his physical desires, his physical will.
- His true being, his real self, was impotent. In his soul he was
- dependent, forlorn. He was childish and dependent on the mother. To hear
- him say, '_Grazia, mamma!_' would have tormented the mother-soul in any
- woman living. Such a child crying in the night! And for what?
- For he was hot-blooded, healthy, almost in his prime, and free as a man
- can be in his circumstances. He had his own way, he admitted no
- thwarting. He governed his circumstances pretty much, coming to our
- village with his little company, playing the plays he chose himself. And
- yet, that which he would have he did not vitally want, it was only a
- sort of inflamed obstinacy that made him so insistent, in the masculine
- way. He was not going to be governed by women, he was not going to be
- dictated to in the least by any one. And this because he was beaten by
- his own flesh.
- His real man's soul, the soul that goes forth and builds up a new world
- out of the void, was ineffectual. It could only revert to the senses.
- His divinity was the phallic divinity. The other male divinity, which is
- the spirit that fulfils in the world the new germ of an idea, this was
- denied and obscured in him, unused. And it was this spirit which cried
- out helplessly in him through the insistent, inflammable flesh. Even
- this play-acting was a form of physical gratification for him, it had in
- it neither real mind nor spirit.
- It was so different from Ibsen, and so much more moving. Ibsen is
- exciting, nervously sensational. But this was really moving, a real
- crying in the night. One loved the Italian nation, and wanted to help it
- with all one's soul. But when one sees the perfect Ibsen, how one hates
- the Norwegian and Swedish nations! They are detestable.
- They seem to be fingering with the mind the secret places and sources of
- the blood, impertinent, irreverent, nasty. There is a certain
- intolerable nastiness about the real Ibsen: the same thing is in
- Strindberg and in most of the Norwegian and Swedish writings. It is with
- them a sort of phallic worship also, but now the worship is mental and
- perverted: the phallus is the real fetish, but it is the source of
- uncleanliness and corruption and death, it is the Moloch, worshipped in
- obscenity.
- Which is unbearable. The phallus is a symbol of creative divinity. But
- it represents only part of creative divinity. The Italian has made it
- represent the whole. Which is now his misery, for he has to destroy his
- symbol in himself.
- Which is why the Italian men have the enthusiasm for war, unashamed.
- Partly it is the true phallic worship, for the phallic principle is to
- absorb and dominate all life. But also it is a desire to expose
- themselves to death, to know death, that death may destroy in them this
- too strong dominion of the blood, may once more liberate the spirit of
- outgoing, of uniting, of making order out of chaos, in the outer world,
- as the flesh makes a new order from chaos in begetting a new life, set
- them free to know and serve a greater idea.
- The peasants below sat and listened intently, like children who hear and
- do not understand, yet who are spellbound. The children themselves sit
- spellbound on the benches till the play is over. They do not fidget or
- lose interest. They watch with wide, absorbed eyes at the mystery, held
- in thrall by the sound of emotion.
- But the villagers do not really care for Ibsen. They let it go. On the
- feast of Epiphany, as a special treat, was given a poetic drama by
- D'Annunzio, _La Fiaccola sotto il Moggio_--_The Light under the Bushel_.
- It is a foolish romantic play of no real significance. There are several
- murders and a good deal of artificial horror. But it is all a very nice
- and romantic piece of make-believe, like a charade.
- So the audience loved it. After the performance of _Ghosts_ I saw the
- barber, and he had the curious grey clayey look of an Italian who is
- cold and depressed. The sterile cold inertia, which the so-called
- passionate nations know so well, had settled on him, and he went
- obliterating himself in the street, as if he were cold, dead.
- But after the D'Annunzio play he was like a man who has drunk sweet wine
- and is warm.
- '_Ah, bellissimo, bellissimo_!' he said, in tones of intoxicated
- reverence, when he saw me.
- 'Better than _I Spettri_?' I said.
- He half-raised his hands, as if to imply the fatuity of the question.
- 'Ah, but--' he said, 'it was D'Annunzio. The other....'
- 'That was Ibsen--a great Norwegian,' I said, 'famous all over the
- world.'
- 'But you know--D'Annunzio is a poet--oh, beautiful, beautiful!' There
- was no going beyond this '_bello--bellissimo_'.
- It was the language which did it. It was the Italian passion for
- rhetoric, for the speech which appeals to the senses and makes no demand
- on the mind. When an Englishman listens to a speech he wants at least to
- imagine that he understands thoroughly and impersonally what is meant.
- But an Italian only cares about the emotion. It is the movement, the
- physical effect of the language upon the blood which gives him supreme
- satisfaction. His mind is scarcely engaged at all. He is like a child,
- hearing and feeling without understanding. It is the sensuous
- gratification he asks for. Which is why D'Annunzio is a god in Italy. He
- can control the current of the blood with his words, and although much
- of what he says is bosh, yet his hearer is satisfied, fulfilled.
- Carnival ends on the 5th of February, so each Thursday there is a Serata
- d' Onore of one of the actors. The first, and the only one for which
- prices were raised--to a fourpence entrance fee instead of
- threepence--was for the leading lady. The play was _The Wife of the
- Doctor_, a modern piece, sufficiently uninteresting; the farce that
- followed made me laugh.
- Since it was her Evening of Honour, Adelaida was the person to see. She
- is very popular, though she is no longer young. In fact, she is the
- mother of the young pert person of _Ghosts_.
- Nevertheless, Adelaida, stout and blonde and soft and pathetic, is the
- real heroine of the theatre, the prima. She is very good at sobbing; and
- afterwards the men exclaim involuntarily, out of their strong emotion,
- '_bella, bella_!' The women say nothing. They sit stiffly and
- dangerously as ever. But, no doubt, they quite agree this is the true
- picture of ill-used, tear-stained woman, the bearer of many wrongs.
- Therefore they take unto themselves the homage of the men's '_bella,
- bella_!' that follows the sobs: it is due recognition of their hard
- wrongs: 'the woman pays.' Nevertheless, they despise in their souls the
- plump, soft Adelaida.
- Dear Adelaida, she is irreproachable. In every age, in every clime, she
- is dear, at any rate to the masculine soul, this soft, tear-blenched,
- blonde, ill-used thing. She must be ill-used and unfortunate. Dear
- Gretchen, dear Desdemona, dear Iphigenia, dear Dame aux Camélias, dear
- Lucy of Lammermoor, dear Mary Magdalene, dear, pathetic, unfortunate
- soul, in all ages and lands, how we love you. In the theatre she
- blossoms forth, she is the lily of the stage. Young and inexperienced as
- I am, I have broken my heart over her several times. I could write a
- sonnet-sequence to her, yes, the fair, pale, tear-stained thing,
- white-robed, with her hair down her back; I could call her by a hundred
- names, in a hundred languages, Melisande, Elizabeth, Juliet, Butterfly,
- Phèdre, Minnehaha, etc. Each new time I hear her voice, with its faint
- clang of tears, my heart grows big and hot, and my bones melt. I detest
- her, but it is no good. My heart begins to swell like a bud under the
- plangent rain.
- The last time I saw her was here, on the Garda, at Salò. She was the
- chalked, thin-armed daughter of Rigoletto. I detested her, her voice had
- a chalky squeak in it. And yet, by the end, my heart was overripe in my
- breast, ready to burst with loving affection. I was ready to walk on to
- the stage, to wipe out the odious, miscreant lover, and to offer her all
- myself, saying, 'I can see it is real _love_ you want, and you shall
- have it: _I_ will give it to you.'
- Of course I know the secret of the Gretchen magic; it is all in the
- 'Save me, Mr Hercules!' phrase. Her shyness, her timidity, her
- trustfulness, her tears foster my own strength and grandeur. I am the
- positive half of the universe. But so I am, if it comes to that, just as
- positive as the other half.
- Adelaida is plump, and her voice has just that moist, plangent strength
- which gives one a real voluptuous thrill. The moment she comes on the
- stage and looks round--a bit scared--she is _she_, Electra, Isolde,
- Sieglinde, Marguèrite. She wears a dress of black voile, like the lady
- who weeps at the trial in the police-court. This is her modern uniform.
- Her antique garment is of trailing white, with a blonde pigtail and a
- flower. Realistically, it is black voile and a handkerchief.
- Adelaida always has a handkerchief. And still I cannot resist it. I say,
- 'There's the hanky!' Nevertheless, in two minutes it has worked its way
- with me. She squeezes it in her poor, plump hand as the tears begin to
- rise; Fate, or man, is inexorable, so cruel. There is a sob, a cry; she
- presses the fist and the hanky to her eyes, one eye, then the other. She
- weeps real tears, tears shaken from the depths of her soft, vulnerable,
- victimized female self. I cannot stand it. There I sit in the padrone's
- little red box and stifle my emotion, whilst I repeat in my heart: 'What
- a shame, child, what a shame!' She is twice my age, but what is age in
- such circumstances? 'Your poor little hanky, it's sopping. There, then,
- don't cry. It'll be all right. _I'll_ see you're all right. _All_ men
- are not beasts, you know.' So I cover her protectively in my arms, and
- soon I shall be kissing her, for comfort, in the heat and prowess of my
- compassion, kissing her soft, plump cheek and neck closely, bringing my
- comfort nearer and nearer.
- It is a pleasant and exciting role for me to play. Robert Burns did the
- part to perfection:
- O wert thou in the cauld blast
- On yonder lea, on yonder lea.
- How many times does one recite that to all the Ophelias and Gretchens in
- the world:
- Thy bield should be my bosom.
- How one admires one's bosom in that capacity! Looking down at one's
- shirt-front, one is filled with strength and pride.
- Why are the women so bad at playing this part in real life, this
- Ophelia-Gretchen role? Why are they so unwilling to go mad and die for
- our sakes? They do it regularly on the stage.
- But perhaps, after all, we write the plays. What a villain I am, what a
- black-browed, passionate, ruthless, masculine villain I am to the
- leading lady on the stage; and, on the other hand, dear heart, what a
- hero, what a fount of chivalrous generosity and faith! I am _anything_
- but a dull and law-abiding citizen. I am a Galahad, full of purity and
- spirituality, I am the Lancelot of valour and lust; I fold my hands, or
- I cock my hat in one side, as the case may be: I am _myself_. Only, I am
- not a respectable citizen, not that, in this hour of my glory and
- my escape.
- Dear Heaven, how Adelaida wept, her voice plashing like violin music, at
- my ruthless, masculine cruelty. Dear heart, how she sighed to rest on my
- sheltering bosom! And how I enjoyed my dual nature! How I
- admired myself!
- Adelaida chose _La Moglie del Dottore_ for her Evening of Honour. During
- the following week came a little storm of coloured bills: 'Great Evening
- of Honour of Enrico Persevalli.'
- This is the leader, the actor-manager. What should he choose for his
- great occasion, this broad, thick-set, ruddy descendant of the peasant
- proprietors of the plain? No one knew. The title of the play was
- not revealed.
- So we were staying at home, it was cold and wet. But the maestra came
- inflammably on that Thursday evening, and were we not going to the
- theatre, to see _Amleto_?
- Poor maestra, she is yellow and bitter-skinned, near fifty, but her dark
- eyes are still corrosively inflammable. She was engaged to a lieutenant
- in the cavalry, who got drowned when she was twenty-one. Since then she
- has hung on the tree unripe, growing yellow and bitter-skinned, never
- developing.
- '_Amleto!_' I say. '_Non lo conosco._'
- A certain fear comes into her eyes. She is schoolmistress, and has a
- mortal dread of being wrong.
- '_Si_,' she cries, wavering, appealing, '_una dramma inglese_.'
- 'English!' I repeated.
- 'Yes, an English drama.'
- 'How do you write it?'
- Anxiously, she gets a pencil from her reticule, and, with black-gloved
- scrupulousness, writes _Amleto_.
- '_Hamlet_!' I exclaim wonderingly.
- '_Ecco, Amleto!_' cries the maestra, her eyes aflame with thankful
- justification.
- Then I knew that Signore Enrico Persevalli was looking to me for an
- audience. His Evening of Honour would be a bitter occasion to him if the
- English were not there to see his performance.
- I hurried to get ready, I ran through the rain. I knew he would take it
- badly that it rained on his Evening of Honour. He counted himself a man
- who had fate against him.
- '_Sono un disgraziato, io._'
- I was late. The First Act was nearly over. The play was not yet alive,
- neither in the bosoms of the actors nor in the audience. I closed the
- door of the box softly, and came forward. The rolling Italian eyes of
- Hamlet glanced up at me. There came a new impulse over the Court
- of Denmark.
- Enrico looked a sad fool in his melancholy black. The doublet sat close,
- making him stout and vulgar, the knee-breeches seemed to exaggerate the
- commonness of his thick, rather short, strutting legs. And he carried a
- long black rag, as a cloak, for histrionic purposes. And he had on his
- face a portentous grimace of melancholy and philosophic importance. His
- was the caricature of Hamlet's melancholy self-absorption.
- I stooped to arrange my footstool and compose my countenance. I was
- trying not to grin. For the first time, attired in philosophic
- melancholy of black silk, Enrico looked a boor and a fool. His
- close-cropped, rather animal head was common above the effeminate
- doublet, his sturdy, ordinary figure looked absurd in a
- melancholic droop.
- All the actors alike were out of their element. Their Majesties of
- Denmark were touching. The Queen, burly little peasant woman, was ill at
- ease in her pink satin. Enrico had had no mercy. He knew she loved to be
- the scolding servant or housekeeper, with her head tied up in a
- handkerchief, shrill and vulgar. Yet here she was pranked out in an
- expanse of satin, la Regina. Regina, indeed!
- She obediently did her best to be important. Indeed, she rather fancied
- herself; she looked sideways at the audience, self-consciously, quite
- ready to be accepted as an imposing and noble person, if they would
- esteem her such. Her voice sounded hoarse and common, but whether it was
- the pink satin in contrast, or a cold, I do not know. She was almost
- childishly afraid to move. Before she began a speech she looked down and
- kicked her skirt viciously, so that she was sure it was under control.
- Then she let go. She was a burly, downright little body of sixty, one
- rather expected her to box Hamlet on the ears.
- Only she liked being a queen when she sat on the throne. There she
- perched with great satisfaction, her train splendidly displayed down the
- steps. She was as proud as a child, and she looked like Queen Victoria
- of the Jubilee period.
- The King, her noble consort, also had new honours thrust upon him, as
- well as new garments. His body was real enough but it had nothing at all
- to do with his clothes. They established a separate identity by
- themselves. But wherever he went, they went with him, to the confusion
- of everybody.
- He was a thin, rather frail-looking peasant, pathetic, and very gentle.
- There was something pure and fine about him, he was so exceedingly
- gentle and by natural breeding courteous. But he did not feel kingly, he
- acted the part with beautiful, simple resignation.
- Enrico Persevalli had overshot himself in every direction, but worst of
- all in his own. He had become a hulking fellow, crawling about with his
- head ducked between his shoulders, pecking and poking, creeping about
- after other people, sniffing at them, setting traps for them, absorbed
- by his own self-important self-consciousness. His legs, in their black
- knee-breeches, had a crawling, slinking look; he always carried the
- black rag of a cloak, something for him to twist about as he twisted in
- his own soul, overwhelmed by a sort of inverted perversity.
- I had always felt an aversion from Hamlet: a creeping, unclean thing he
- seems, on the stage, whether he is Forbes Robertson or anybody else. His
- nasty poking and sniffing at his mother, his setting traps for the King,
- his conceited perversion with Ophelia make him always intolerable. The
- character is repulsive in its conception, based on self-dislike and a
- spirit of disintegration.
- There is, I think, this strain of cold dislike, or self-dislike, through
- much of the Renaissance art, and through all the later Shakespeare. In
- Shakespeare it is a kind of corruption in the flesh and a conscious
- revolt from this. A sense of corruption in the flesh makes Hamlet
- frenzied, for he will never admit that it is his own flesh. Leonardo da
- Vinci is the same, but Leonardo loves the corruption maliciously.
- Michelangelo rejects any feeling of corruption, he stands by the flesh,
- the flesh only. It is the corresponding reaction, but in the opposite
- direction. But that is all four hundred years ago. Enrico Persevalli has
- just reached the position. He _is_ Hamlet, and evidently he has great
- satisfaction in the part. He is the modern Italian, suspicious,
- isolated, self-nauseated, labouring in a sense of physical corruption.
- But he will not admit it is in himself. He creeps about in self-conceit,
- transforming his own self-loathing. With what satisfaction did he reveal
- corruption--corruption in his neighbours he gloated in--letting his
- mother know he had discovered her incest, her uncleanness, gloated in
- torturing the incestuous King. Of all the unclean ones, Hamlet was the
- uncleanest. But he accused only the others.
- Except in the 'great' speeches, and there Enrico was betrayed, Hamlet
- suffered the extremity of physical self-loathing, loathing of his own
- flesh. The play is the statement of the most significant philosophic
- position of the Renaissance. Hamlet is far more even than Orestes, his
- prototype, a mental creature, anti-physical, anti-sensual. The whole
- drama is the tragedy of the convulsed reaction of the mind from the
- flesh, of the spirit from the self, the reaction from the great
- aristocratic to the great democratic principle.
- An ordinary instinctive man, in Hamlet's position, would either have set
- about murdering his uncle, by reflex action, or else would have gone
- right away. There would have been no need for Hamlet to murder his
- mother. It would have been sufficient blood-vengeance if he had killed
- his uncle. But that is the statement according to the aristocratic
- principle.
- Orestes was in the same position, but the same position two thousand
- years earlier, with two thousand years of experience wanting. So that
- the question was not so intricate in him as in Hamlet, he was not nearly
- so conscious. The whole Greek life was based on the idea of the
- supremacy of the self, and the self was always male. Orestes was his
- father's child, he would be the same whatever mother he had. The mother
- was but the vehicle, the soil in which the paternal seed was planted.
- When Clytemnestra murdered Agamemnon, it was as if a common individual
- murdered God, to the Greek.
- But Agamemnon, King and Lord, was not infallible. He was fallible. He
- had sacrificed Iphigenia for the sake of glory in war, for the
- fulfilment of the superb idea of self, but on the other hand he had made
- cruel dissension for the sake of the concubines captured in war. The
- paternal flesh was fallible, ungodlike. It lusted after meaner pursuits
- than glory, war, and slaying, it was not faithful to the highest idea of
- the self. Orestes was driven mad by the furies of his mother, because of
- the justice that they represented. Nevertheless he was in the end
- exculpated. The third play of the trilogy is almost foolish, with its
- prating gods. But it means that, according to the Greek conviction,
- Orestes was right and Clytemnestra entirely wrong. But for all that, the
- infallible King, the infallible male Self, is dead in Orestes, killed by
- the furies of Clytemnestra. He gains his peace of mind after the
- revulsion from his own physical fallibility, but he will never be an
- unquestioned lord, as Agamemnon was. Orestes is left at peace,
- neutralized. He is the beginning of non-aristocratic Christianity.
- Hamlet's father, the King, is, like Agamemnon, a warrior-king. But,
- unlike Agamemnon, he is blameless with regard to Gertrude. Yet Gertrude,
- like Clytemnestra, is the potential murderer of her husband, as Lady
- Macbeth is murderess, as the daughters of Lear. The women murder the
- supreme male, the ideal Self, the King and Father.
- This is the tragic position Shakespeare must dwell upon. The woman
- rejects, repudiates the ideal Self which the male represents to her. The
- supreme representative, King and Father, is murdered by the Wife and the
- Daughters.
- What is the reason? Hamlet goes mad in a revulsion of rage and nausea.
- Yet the women-murderers only represent some ultimate judgement in his
- own soul. At the bottom of his own soul Hamlet has decided that the Self
- in its supremacy, Father and King, must die. It is a suicidal decision
- for his involuntary soul to have arrived at. Yet it is inevitable. The
- great religious, philosophic tide, which has been swelling all through
- the Middle Ages, had brought him there.
- The question, to be or not to be, which Hamlet puts himself, does not
- mean, to live or not to live. It is not the simple human being who puts
- himself the question, it is the supreme I, King and Father. To be or not
- to be King, Father, in the Self supreme? And the decision is, not to be.
- It is the inevitable philosophic conclusion of all the Renaissance. The
- deepest impulse in man, the religious impulse, is the desire to be
- immortal, or infinite, consummated. And this impulse is satisfied in
- fulfilment of an idea, a steady progression. In this progression man is
- satisfied, he seems to have reached his goal, this infinity, this
- immortality, this eternal being, with every step nearer which he takes.
- And so, according to his idea of fulfilment, man establishes the whole
- order of life. If my fulfilment is the fulfilment and establishment of
- the unknown divine Self which I am, then I shall proceed in the
- realizing of the greatest idea of the self, the highest conception of
- the I, my order of life will be kingly, imperial, aristocratic. The body
- politic also will culminate in this divinity of the flesh, this body
- imbued with glory, invested with divine power and might, the King, the
- Emperor. In the body politic also I shall desire a king, an emperor, a
- tyrant, glorious, mighty, in whom I see myself consummated and
- fulfilled. This is inevitable!
- But during the Middle Ages, struggling within this pagan, original
- transport, the transport of the Ego, was a small dissatisfaction, a
- small contrary desire. Amid the pomp of kings and popes was the Child
- Jesus and the Madonna. Jesus the King gradually dwindled down. There was
- Jesus the Child, helpless, at the mercy of all the world. And there was
- Jesus crucified.
- The old transport, the old fulfilment of the Ego, the Davidian ecstasy,
- the assuming of all power and glory unto the self, the becoming infinite
- through the absorption of all into the Ego, this gradually became
- unsatisfactory. This was not the infinite, this was not immortality.
- This was eternal death, this was damnation.
- The monk rose up with his opposite ecstasy, the Christian ecstasy. There
- was a death to die: the flesh, the self, must die, so that the spirit
- should rise again immortal, eternal, infinite. I am dead unto myself,
- but I live in the Infinite. The finite Me is no more, only the Infinite,
- the Eternal, is.
- At the Renaissance this great half-truth overcame the other great
- half-truth. The Christian Infinite, reached by a process of abnegation,
- a process of being absorbed, dissolved, diffused into the great
- Not-Self, supplanted the old pagan Infinite, wherein the self like a
- root threw out branches and radicles which embraced the whole universe,
- became the Whole.
- There is only one Infinite, the world now cried, there is the great
- Christian Infinite of renunciation and consummation in the not-self. The
- other, that old pride, is damnation. The sin of sins is Pride, it is the
- way to total damnation. Whereas the pagans based their life on pride.
- And according to this new Infinite, reached through renunciation and
- dissolving into the Others, the Neighbour, man must build up his actual
- form of life. With Savonarola and Martin Luther the living Church
- actually transformed itself, for the Roman Church was still pagan. Henry
- VIII simply said: 'There is no Church, there is only the State.' But
- with Shakespeare the transformation had reached the State also. The
- King, the Father, the representative of the Consummate Self, the maximum
- of all life, the symbol of the consummate being, the becoming Supreme,
- Godlike, Infinite, he must perish and pass away. This Infinite was not
- infinite, this consummation was not consummated, all this was fallible,
- false. It was rotten, corrupt. It must go. But Shakespeare was also the
- thing itself. Hence his horror, his frenzy, his self-loathing.
- The King, the Emperor is killed in the soul of man, the old order of
- life is over, the old tree is dead at the root. So said Shakespeare. It
- was finally enacted in Cromwell. Charles I took up the old position of
- kingship by divine right. Like Hamlet's father, he was blameless
- otherwise. But as representative of the old form of life, which mankind
- now hated with frenzy, he must be cut down, removed. It was a
- symbolic act.
- The world, our world of Europe, had now really turned, swung round to a
- new goal, a new idea, the Infinite reached through the omission of Self.
- God is all that which is Not-Me. I am consummate when my Self, the
- resistant solid, is reduced and diffused into all that which is Not-Me:
- my neighbour, my enemy, the great Otherness. Then I am perfect.
- And from this belief the world began gradually to form a new State, a
- new body politic, in which the Self should be removed. There should be
- no king, no lords, no aristocrats. The world continued in its religious
- belief, beyond the French Revolution, beyond the great movement of
- Shelley and Godwin. There should be no Self. That which was supreme was
- that which was Not-Me, the other. The governing factor in the State was
- the idea of the good of others; that is, the Common Good. And the
- _vital_ governing idea in the State has been this idea since Cromwell.
- Before Cromwell the idea was 'For the King', because every man saw
- himself consummated in the King. After Cromwell the idea was 'For the
- good of my neighbour', or 'For the good of the people', or 'For the good
- of the whole'. This has been our ruling idea, by which we have more or
- less lived.
- Now this has failed. Now we say that the Christian Infinite is not
- infinite. We are tempted, like Nietzsche, to return back to the old
- pagan Infinite, to say that is supreme. Or we are inclined, like the
- English and the Pragmatist, to say, 'There is no Infinite, there is no
- Absolute. The only Absolute is expediency, the only reality is sensation
- and momentariness.' But we may say this, even act on it, _à la Sanine_.
- But we never believe it.
- What is really Absolute is the mystic Reason which connects both
- Infinites, the Holy Ghost that relates both natures of God. If we now
- wish to make a living State, we must build it up to the idea of the Holy
- Spirit, the supreme Relationship. We must say, the pagan Infinite is
- infinite, the Christian Infinite is infinite: these are our two
- Consummations, in both of these we are consummated. But that which
- relates them alone is absolute.
- This Absolute of the Holy Ghost we may call Truth or Justice or Right.
- These are partial names, indefinite and unsatisfactory unless there be
- kept the knowledge of the two Infinites, pagan and Christian, which they
- go between. When both are there, they are like a superb bridge, on which
- one can stand and know the whole world, my world, the two halves of
- the universe.
- '_Essere, o non essere, è qui il punto._'
- To be or not to be was the question for Hamlet to settle. It is no
- longer our question, at least, not in the same sense. When it is a
- question of death, the fashionable young suicide declares that his
- self-destruction is the final proof of his own incontrovertible being.
- And as for not-being in our public life, we have achieved it as much as
- ever we want to, as much as is necessary. Whilst in private life there
- is a swing back to paltry selfishness as a creed. And in the war there
- is the position of neutralization and nothingness. It is a question of
- knowing how _to be_, and how _not to be_, for we must fulfil both.
- Enrico Persevalli was detestable with his '_Essere, o non essere_'. He
- whispered it in a hoarse whisper as if it were some melodramatic murder
- he was about to commit. As a matter of fact, he knows quite well, and
- has known all his life, that his pagan Infinite, his transport of the
- flesh and the supremacy of the male in fatherhood, is all
- unsatisfactory. All his life he has really cringed before the northern
- Infinite of the Not-Self, although he has continued in the Italian habit
- of Self. But it is mere habit, sham.
- How can he know anything about being and not-being when he is only a
- maudlin compromise between them, and all he wants is to be a maudlin
- compromise? He is neither one nor the other. He has neither being nor
- riot-being. He is as equivocal as the monks. He was detestable, mouthing
- Hamlet's sincere words. He has still to let go, to know what not-being
- is, before he can _be_. Till he has gone through the Christian negation
- of himself, and has known the Christian consummation, he is a mere
- amorphous heap.
- For the soliloquies of Hamlet are as deep as the soul of man can go, in
- one direction, and as sincere as the Holy Spirit itself in their
- essence. But thank heaven, the bog into which Hamlet struggled is almost
- surpassed.
- It is a strange thing, if a man covers his face, and speaks with his
- eyes blinded, how significant and poignant he becomes. The ghost of this
- Hamlet was very simple. He was wrapped down to the knees in a great
- white cloth, and over his face was an open-work woollen shawl. But the
- naïve blind helplessness and verity of his voice was strangely
- convincing. He seemed the most real thing in the play. From the knees
- downward he was Laertes, because he had on Laertes' white trousers and
- patent leather slippers. Yet he was strangely real, a voice out of
- the dark.
- The Ghost is really one of the play's failures, it is so trivial and
- unspiritual and vulgar. And it was spoilt for me from the first. When I
- was a child I went to the twopenny travelling theatre to see _Hamlet_.
- The Ghost had on a helmet and a breastplate. I sat in pale transport.
- ''Amblet, 'Amblet, I _am_ thy father's ghost.'
- Then came a voice from the dark, silent audience, like a cynical knife
- to my fond soul:
- 'Why tha arena, I can tell thy voice.'
- The peasants loved Ophelia: she was in white with her hair down her
- back. Poor thing, she was pathetic, demented. And no wonder, after
- Hamlet's 'O, that this too, too solid flesh would melt!' What then of
- her young breasts and her womb? Hamlet with her was a very disagreeable
- sight. The peasants loved her. There was a hoarse roar, half of
- indignation, half of roused passion, at the end of her scene.
- The graveyard scene, too, was a great success, but I could not bear
- Hamlet. And the grave-digger in Italian was a mere buffoon. The whole
- scene was farcical to me because of the Italian, '_Questo cranio,
- Signore_--'And Enrico, dainty fellow, took the skull in a corner of his
- black cloak. As an Italian, he would not willingly touch it. It was
- unclean. But he looked a fool, hulking himself in his lugubriousness. He
- was as self-important as D'Annunzio.
- The close fell flat. The peasants had applauded the whole graveyard
- scene wildly. But at the end of all they got up and crowded to the
- doors, as if to hurry away: this in spite of Enrico's final feat: he
- fell backwards, smack down three steps of the throne platform, on to the
- stage. But planks and braced muscle will bounce, and Signer Amleto
- bounced quite high again.
- It was the end of _Amleto_, and I was glad. But I loved the theatre, I
- loved to look down on the peasants, who were so absorbed. At the end of
- the scenes the men pushed back their black hats, and rubbed their hair
- across their brows with a pleased, excited movement. And the women
- stirred in their seats.
- Just one man was with his wife and child, and he was of the same race as
- my old woman at San Tommaso. He was fair, thin, and clear, abstract, of
- the mountains. He seemed to have gathered his wife and child together
- into another, finer atmosphere, like the air of the mountains, and to
- guard them in it. This is the real Joseph, father of the child. He has a
- fierce, abstract look, wild and untamed as a hawk, but like a hawk at
- its own nest, fierce with love. He goes out and buys a tiny bottle of
- lemonade for a penny, and the mother and child sip it in tiny sips,
- whilst he bends over, like a hawk arching its wings.
- It is the fierce spirit of the Ego come out of the primal infinite, but
- detached, isolated, an aristocrat. He is not an Italian, dark-blooded.
- He is fair, keen as steel, with the blood of the mountaineer in him. He
- is like my old spinning woman. It is curious how, with his wife and
- child, he makes a little separate world down there in the theatre, like
- a hawk's nest, high and arid under the gleaming sky.
- The Bersaglieri sit close together in groups, so that there is a
- strange, corporal connexion between them. They have close-cropped, dark,
- slightly bestial heads, and thick shoulders, and thick brown hands on
- each other's shoulders. When an act is over they pick up their cherished
- hats and fling on their cloaks and go into the hall. They are rather
- rich, the Bersaglieri.
- They are like young, half-wild oxen, such strong, sturdy, dark lads,
- thickly built and with strange hard heads, like young male caryatides.
- They keep close together, as if there were some physical instinct
- connecting them. And they are quite womanless. There is a curious
- inter-absorption among themselves, a sort of physical trance that holds
- them all, and puts their minds to sleep. There is a strange, hypnotic
- unanimity among them as they put on their plumed hats and go out
- together, always very close, as if their bodies must touch. Then they
- feel safe and content in this heavy, physical trance. They are in love
- with one another, the young men love the young men. They shrink from the
- world beyond, from the outsiders, from all who are not Bersaglieri of
- their barracks.
- One man is a sort of leader. He is very straight and solid, solid like a
- wall, with a dark, unblemished will. His cock-feathers slither in a
- profuse, heavy stream from his black oil-cloth hat, almost to his
- shoulder. He swings round. His feathers slip into a cascade. Then he
- goes out to the hall, his feather tossing and falling richly. He must be
- well off. The Bersaglieri buy their own black cock's-plumes, and some
- pay twenty or thirty francs for the bunch, so the maestra said. The poor
- ones have only poor, scraggy plumes.
- There is something very primitive about these men. They remind me really
- of Agamemnon's soldiers clustered oil the seashore, men, all men, a
- living, vigorous, physical host of men. But there is a pressure on these
- Italian soldiers, as if they were men caryatides, with a great weight on
- their heads, making their brain hard, asleep, stunned. They all look is
- if their real brain were stunned, as if there were another centre of
- physical consciousness from which they lived.
- Separate from them all is Pietro, the young man who lounges on the wharf
- to carry things from the steamer. He starts up from sleep like a
- wild-cat as somebody claps him on the shoulder. It is the start of a man
- who has many enemies. He is almost an outlaw. Will he ever find himself
- in prison? He is the _gamin_ of the village, well detested.
- He is twenty-four years old, thin, dark, handsome, with a cat-like
- lightness and grace, and a certain repulsive, _gamin_ evil in his face.
- Where everybody is so clean and tidy, he is almost ragged. His week's
- beard shows very black in his slightly hollow cheeks. He hates the man
- who has waked him by clapping him on the shoulder.
- Pietro is already married, yet he behaves as if he were not. He has been
- carrying on with a loose woman, the wife of the citron-coloured barber,
- the Siciliano. Then he seats himself on the women's side of the theatre,
- behind a young person from Bogliaco, who also has no reputation, and
- makes her talk to him. He leans forward, resting his arms on the seat
- before him, stretching his slender, cat-like, flexible loins. The
- padrona of the hotel hates him--'_ein frecher Kerl_,' she says with
- contempt, and she looks away. Her eyes hate to see him.
- In the village there is the clerical party, which is the majority;
- there is the anti-clerical party, and there are the ne'er-do-wells. The
- clerical people are dark and pious and cold; there is a curious
- stone-cold, ponderous darkness over them, moral and gloomy. Then the
- anti-clerical party, with the Syndaco at the head, is bourgeois and
- respectable as far as the middle-aged people are concerned, banal,
- respectable, shut off as by a wall from the clerical people. The young
- anti-clericals are the young bloods of the place, the men who gather
- every night in the more expensive and less-respectable cafe. These young
- men are all free-thinkers, great dancers, singers, players of the
- guitar. They are immoral and slightly cynical. Their leader is the young
- shopkeeper, who has lived in Vienna, who is a bit of a bounder, with a
- veneer of sneering irony on an original good nature. He is well-to-do,
- and gives dances to which only the looser women go, with these reckless
- young men. He also gets up parties of pleasure, and is chiefly
- responsible for the coming of the players to the theatre this carnival.
- These young men are disliked, but they belong to the important class,
- they are well-to-do, and they have the life of the village in their
- hands. The clerical peasants are priest-ridden and good, because they
- are poor and afraid and superstitious. There is, lastly, a sprinkling of
- loose women, one who keeps the inn where the soldiers drink. These women
- are a definite set. They know what they are, they pretend nothing else.
- They are not prostitutes, but just loose women. They keep to their own
- clique, among men and women, never wanting to compromise anybody else.
- And beyond all these there are the Franciscan friars in their brown
- robes, so shy, so silent, so obliterated, as they stand back in the
- shop, waiting to buy the bread for the monastery, waiting obscure and
- neutral, till no one shall be in the shop wanting to be served. The
- village women speak to them in a curious neutral, official, slightly
- contemptuous voice. They answer neutral and humble, though distinctly.
- At the theatre, now the play is over, the peasants in their black hats
- and cloaks crowd the hall. Only Pietro, the wharf-lounger, has no cloak,
- and a bit of a cap on the side of his head instead of a black felt hat.
- His clothes are thin and loose on his thin, vigorous, cat-like body, and
- he is cold, but he takes no notice. His hands are always in his pockets,
- his shoulders slightly raised.
- The few women slip away home. In the little theatre bar the well-to-do
- young atheists are having another drink. Not that they spend much. A
- tumbler of wine or a glass of vermouth costs a penny. And the wine is
- horrible new stuff. Yet the little baker, Agostino, sits on a bench with
- his pale baby on his knee, putting the wine to its lips. And the baby
- drinks, like a blind fledgeling.
- Upstairs, the quality has paid its visits and shaken hands: the Syndaco
- and the well-to-do half-Austrian owners of the woodyard, the Bertolini,
- have ostentatiously shown their mutual friendship; our padrone, the
- Signer Pietro Di Paoli, has visited his relatives the Graziani in the
- box next the stage and has spent two intervals with us in our box;
- meanwhile, his two peasants standing down below, pathetic, thin
- contadini of the old school, like worn stones, have looked up at us as
- if we are the angels in heaven, with a reverential, devotional eye, they
- themselves far away below, standing in the bay at the back, below all.
- The chemist and the grocer and the schoolmistress pay calls. They have
- all sat self-consciously posed in the front of their boxes, like framed
- photographs of themselves. The second grocer and the baker visit each
- other. The barber looks in on the carpenter, then drops downstairs among
- the crowd. Class distinctions are cut very fine. As we pass with the
- padrona of the hotel, who is a Bavarian, we stop to speak to our own
- padroni, the Di Paoli. They have a warm handshake and effusive polite
- conversation for us; for Maria Samuelli, a distant bow. We realize
- our mistake.
- The barber--not the Siciliano, but flashy little Luigi with the big
- tie-ring and the curls--knows all about the theatre. He says that Enrico
- Persevalli has for his mistress Carina, the servant in _Ghosts_: that
- the thin, gentle, old-looking king in _Hamlet_ is the husband of
- Adelaida, and Carina is their daughter: that the old, sharp, fat little
- body of a queen is Adelaida's mother: that they all like Enrico
- Persevalli, because he is a very clever man: but that the 'Comic', Il
- Brillante, Francesco, is unsatisfied.
- In three performances in Epiphany week, the company took two hundred and
- sixty-five francs, which was phenomenal. The manager, Enrico Persevalli,
- and Adelaida pay twenty-four francs for every performance, or every
- evening on which a performance is given, as rent for the theatre,
- including light. The company is completely satisfied with its reception
- on the Lago di Garda.
- So it is all over. The Bersaglieri go running all the way home, because
- it is already past half past ten. The night is very dark. About four
- miles up the lake the searchlights of the Austrian border are swinging,
- looking for smugglers. Otherwise the darkness is complete.
- _4_
- SAN GAUDENZIO
- In the autumn the little rosy cyclamens blossom in the shade of this
- west side of the lake. They are very cold and fragrant, and their scent
- seems to belong to Greece, to the Bacchae. They are real flowers of the
- past. They seem to be blossoming in the landscape of Phaedra and Helen.
- They bend down, they brood like little chill fires. They are little
- living myths that I cannot understand.
- After the cyclamens the Christmas roses are in bud. It is at this season
- that the cacchi are ripe on the trees in the garden, whole naked trees
- full of lustrous, orange-yellow, paradisal fruit, gleaming against the
- wintry blue sky. The monthly roses still blossom frail and pink, there
- are still crimson and yellow roses. But the vines are bare and the
- lemon-houses shut. And then, mid-winter, the lowest buds of the
- Christmas roses appear under the hedges and rocks and by the streams.
- They are very lovely, these first large, cold, pure buds, like violets,
- like magnolias, but cold, lit up with the light from the snow.
- The days go by, through the brief silence of winter, when the sunshine
- is so still and pure, like iced wine, and the dead leaves gleam brown,
- and water sounds hoarse in the ravines. It is so still and transcendent,
- the cypress trees poise like flames of forgotten darkness, that should
- have been blown out at the end of the summer. For as we have candles to
- light the darkness of night, so the cypresses are candles to keep the
- darkness aflame in the full sunshine.
- Meanwhile, the Christmas roses become many. They rise from their budded,
- intact humbleness near the ground, they rise up, they throw up their
- crystal, they become handsome, they are heaps of confident, mysterious
- whiteness in the shadow of a rocky stream. It is almost uncanny to see
- them. They are the flowers of darkness, white and wonderful
- beyond belief.
- Then their radiance becomes soiled and brown, they thaw, break, and
- scatter and vanish away. Already the primroses are coming out, and the
- almond is in bud. The winter is passing away. On the mountains the
- fierce snow gleams apricot gold as evening approaches, golden, apricot,
- but so bright that it is almost frightening. What can be so fiercely
- gleaming when all is shadowy? It is something inhuman and unmitigated
- between heaven and earth.
- The heavens are strange and proud all the winter, their progress goes on
- without reference to the dim earth. The dawns come white and
- translucent, the lake is a moonstone in the dark hills, then across the
- lake there stretches a vein of fire, then a whole, orange, flashing
- track over the whiteness. There is the exquisite silent passage of the
- day, and then at evening the afterglow, a huge incandescence of rose,
- hanging above and gleaming, as if it were the presence of a host of
- angels in rapture. It gleams like a rapturous chorus, then passes away,
- and the stars appear, large and flashing.
- Meanwhile, the primroses are dawning on the ground, their light is
- growing stronger, spreading over the banks and under the bushes. Between
- the olive roots the violets are out, large, white, grave violets, and
- less serious blue ones. And looking down the bill, among the grey smoke
- of olive leaves, pink puffs of smoke are rising up. It is the almond and
- the apricot trees, it is the Spring.
- Soon the primroses are strong on the ground. There is a bank of small,
- frail crocuses shooting the lavender into this spring. And then the
- tussocks and tussocks of primroses are fully out, there is full morning
- everywhere on the banks and roadsides and stream-sides, and around the
- olive roots, a morning of primroses underfoot, with an invisible
- threading of many violets, and then the lovely blue clusters of
- hepatica, really like pieces of blue sky showing through a clarity of
- primrose. The few birds are piping thinly and shyly, the streams sing
- again, there is a strange flowering shrub full of incense, overturned
- flowers of crimson and gold, like Bohemian glass. Between the olive
- roots new grass is coming, day is leaping all clear and coloured from
- the earth, it is full Spring, full first rapture.
- Does it pass away, or does it only lose its pristine quality? It deepens
- and intensifies, like experience. The days seem to be darker and richer,
- there is a sense of power in the strong air. On the banks by the lake
- the orchids are out, many, many pale bee-orchids standing clear from the
- short grass over the lake. And in the hollows are the grape hyacinths,
- purple as noon, with the heavy, sensual fragrance of noon. They are
- many-breasted, and full of milk, and ripe, and sun-darkened, like
- many-breasted Diana.
- We could not bear to live down in the village any more, now that the
- days opened large and spacious and the evenings drew out in sunshine. We
- could not bear the indoors, when above us the mountains shone in clear
- air. It was time to go up, to climb with the sun.
- So after Easter we went to San Gaudenzio. It was three miles away, up
- the winding mule-track that climbed higher and higher along the lake.
- Leaving the last house of the village, the path wound on the steep,
- cliff-like side of the lake, curving into the hollow where the landslip
- had tumbled the rocks in chaos, then out again on to the bluff of a
- headland that hung over the lake.
- Thus we came to the tall barred gate of San Gaudenzio, on which was the
- usual little fire-insurance tablet, and then the advertisements for
- beer, 'Birra, Verona', which is becoming a more and more popular drink.
- Through the gate, inside the high wall, is the little Garden of Eden, a
- property of three or four acres fairly level upon a headland over the
- lake. The high wall girds it on the land side, and makes it perfectly
- secluded. On the lake-side it is bounded by the sudden drops of the
- land, in sharp banks and terraces, overgrown with ilex and with laurel
- bushes, down to the brink of the cliff, so that the thicket of the first
- declivities seems to safeguard the property.
- The pink farm-house stands almost in the centre of the little territory,
- among the olive trees. It is a solid, six-roomed place, about fifty
- years old, having been rebuilt by Paolo's uncle. Here we came to live
- for a time with the Fiori, Maria and Paolo, and their three children,
- Giovanni and Marco and Felicina.
- Paolo had inherited, or partly inherited, San Gaudenzio, which had been
- in his family for generations. He was a peasant of fifty-three, very
- grey and wrinkled and worn-looking, but at the same time robust, with
- full strong limbs and a powerful chest. His face was old, but his body
- was solid and powerful. His eyes were blue like upper ice, beautiful. He
- had been a fair-haired man, now he was almost white.
- He, was strangely like the pictures of peasants in the northern Italian
- pictures, with the same curious nobility, the same aristocratic, eternal
- look of motionlessness, something statuesque. His head was hard and
- fine, the bone finely constructed, though the skin of his face was loose
- and furrowed with work. His temples had that fine, hard clarity which is
- seen in Mantegna, an almost jewel-like quality.
- We all loved Paolo, he was so finished in his being, detached, with an
- almost classic simplicity and gentleness, an eternal kind of sureness.
- There was also something concluded and unalterable about him, something
- inaccessible.
- Maria Fiori was different. She was from the plain, like Enrico
- Persevalli and the Bersaglier from the Venetian district. She reminded
- me again of oxen, broad-boned and massive in physique, dark-skinned,
- slow in her soul. But, like the oxen of the plain, she knew her work,
- she knew the other people engaged in the work. Her intelligence was
- attentive and purposive. She had been a housekeeper, a servant, in
- Venice and Verona, before her marriage. She had got the hang of this
- world of commerce and activity, she wanted to master it. But she was
- weighted down by her heavy animal blood.
- Paolo and she were the opposite sides of the universe, the light and the
- dark. Yet they lived together now without friction, detached, each
- subordinated in their common relationship. With regard to Maria, Paolo
- omitted himself; Maria omitted herself with regard to Paolo. Their souls
- were silent and detached, completely apart, and silent, quite silent.
- They shared the physical relationship of marriage as if it were
- something beyond them, a third thing.
- They had suffered very much in the earlier stages of their connexion.
- Now the storm had gone by, leaving them, as it were, spent. They were
- both by nature passionate, vehement. But the lines of their passion were
- opposite. Hers was the primitive, crude, violent flux of the blood,
- emotional and undiscriminating, but wanting to mix and mingle. His was
- the hard, clear, invulnerable passion of the bones, finely tempered and
- unchangeable. She was the flint and he the steel. But in continual
- striking together they only destroyed each other. The fire was a third
- thing, belonging to neither of them.
- She was still heavy and full of desire. She was much younger than he.
- 'How long did you know your Signora before you were married?' she asked
- me.
- 'Six weeks,' I said.
- '_Il Paolo e me, venti giorni, tre settimane_,' she cried vehemently.
- Three weeks they had known each other when they married. She still
- triumphed in the fact. So did Paolo. But it was past, strangely and
- rather terribly past.
- What did they want when they came together, Paolo and she? He was a man
- over thirty, she was a woman of twenty-three. They were both violent in
- desire and of strong will. They came together at once, like two
- wrestlers almost matched in strength. Their meetings must have been
- splendid. Giovanni, the eldest child, was a tall lad of sixteen, with
- soft brown hair and grey eyes, and a clarity of brow, and the same calm
- simplicity of bearing which made Paolo so complete; but the son had at
- the same time a certain brownness of skin, a heaviness of blood, which
- he had from his mother. Paolo was so clear and translucent.
- In Giovanni the fusion of the parents was perfect, he was a perfect
- spark from the flint and steel. There was in Paolo a subtle intelligence
- in feeling, a delicate appreciation of the other person. But the mind
- was unintelligent, he could not grasp a new order. Maria Fiori was much
- sharper and more adaptable to the ways of the world. Paolo had an almost
- glass-like quality, fine and clear and perfectly tempered; but he was
- also finished and brittle. Maria was much coarser, more vulgar, but also
- she was more human, more fertile, with crude potentiality. His passion
- was too fixed in its motion, hers too loose and overwhelming.
- But Giovanni was beautiful, gentle, and courtly like Paolo, but warm,
- like Maria, ready to flush like a girl with anger or confusion. He stood
- straight and tall, and seemed to look into the far distance with his
- clear grey eyes. Yet also he could look at one and touch one with his
- look, he could meet one. Paolo's blue eyes were like the eyes of the old
- spinning-woman, clear and blue and belonging to the mountains, their
- vision seemed to end in space, abstract. They reminded me of the eyes of
- the eagle, which looks into the sun, and which teaches its young to do
- the same, although they are unwilling.
- Marco, the second son, was thirteen years old. He was his mother's
- favourite, Giovanni loved his father best. But Marco was his mother's
- son, with the same brown-gold and red complexion, like a pomegranate,
- and coarse black hair, and brown eyes like pebble, like agate, like an
- animal's eyes. He had the same broad, bovine figure, though he was only
- a boy. But there was some discrepancy in him. He was not unified, he had
- no identity.
- He was strong and full of animal life, but always aimless, as though his
- wits scarcely controlled him. But he loved his mother with a
- fundamental, generous, undistinguishing love. Only he always forgot what
- he was going to do. He was much more sensitive than Maria, more shy and
- reluctant. But his shyness, his sensitiveness only made him more aimless
- and awkward, a tiresome clown, slack and uncontrolled, witless. All day
- long his mother shouted and shrilled and scolded at him, or hit him
- angrily. He did not mind, he came up like a cork, warm and roguish and
- curiously appealing. She loved him with a fierce protective love,
- grounded on pain. There was such a split, a contrariety in his soul, one
- part reacting against the other, which landed him always into trouble.
- It was when Marco was a baby that Paolo had gone to America. They were
- poor on San Gaudenzio. There were the few olive trees, the grapes, and
- the fruit; there was the one cow. But these scarcely made a living.
- Neither was Maria content with the real peasants' lot any more, polenta
- at midday and vegetable soup in the evening, and no way out, nothing to
- look forward to, no future, only this eternal present. She had been in
- service, and had eaten bread and drunk coffee, and known the flux and
- variable chance of life. She had departed from the old static
- conception. She knew what one might be, given a certain chance. The
- fixture was the thing she militated against. So Paolo went to America,
- to California, into the gold mines.
- Maria wanted the future, the endless possibility of life on earth. She
- wanted her sons to be freer, to achieve a new plane of living. The
- peasant's life was a slave's life, she said, railing against the poverty
- and the drudgery. And it was quite true, Paolo and Giovanni worked
- twelve and fourteen hours a day at heavy laborious work that would have
- broken an Englishman. And there was nothing at the end of it. Yet Paolo
- was even happy so. This was the truth to him.
- It was the mother who wanted things different. It was she who railed and
- railed against the miserable life of the peasants. When we were going to
- throw to the fowls a dry broken penny roll of white bread, Maria said,
- with anger and shame and resentment in her voice: 'Give it to Marco, he
- will eat it. It isn't too dry for him.'
- White bread was a treat for them even now, when everybody eats bread.
- And Maria Fiori hated it, that bread should be a treat to her children,
- when it was the meanest food of all the rest of the world. She was in
- opposition to this order. She did not want her sons to be peasants,
- fixed and static as posts driven in the earth. She wanted them to be in
- the great flux of life in the midst of all possibilities. So she at
- length sent Paolo to America to the gold-mines. Meanwhile, she covered
- the wall of her parlour with picture postcards, to bring the outer world
- of cities and industries into her house.
- Paolo was entirely remote from Maria's world. He had not yet even
- grasped the fact of money, not thoroughly. He reckoned in land and olive
- trees. So he had the old fatalistic attitude to his circumstances, even
- to his food. The earth was the Lord's and the fulness thereof; also the
- leanness thereof. Paolo could only do his part and leave the rest. If he
- ate in plenty, having oil and wine and sausage in the house, and plenty
- of maize-meal, he was glad with the Lord. If he ate meagrely, of poor
- polenta, that was fate, it was the skies that ruled these things, and no
- man ruled the skies. He took his fate as it fell from the skies.
- Maria was exorbitant about money. She would charge us all she could for
- what we had and for what was done for us.
- Yet she was not mean in her soul. In her soul she was in a state of
- anger because of her own closeness. It was a violation to her strong
- animal nature. Yet her mind had wakened to the value of money. She knew
- she could alter her position, the position of her children, by virtue of
- money. She knew it was only money that made the difference between
- master and servant. And this was all the difference she would
- acknowledge. So she ruled her life according to money. Her supreme
- passion was to be mistress rather than servant, her supreme aspiration
- for her children was that in the end they might be masters and
- not servants.
- Paolo was untouched by all this. For him there was some divinity about a
- master which even America had not destroyed. If we came in for supper
- whilst the family was still at table he would have the children at once
- take their plates to the wall, he would have Maria at once set the table
- for us, though their own meal were never finished. And this was not
- servility, it was the dignity of a religious conception. Paolo regarded
- us as belonging to the Signoria, those who are elect, near to God. And
- this was part of his religious service. His life was a ritual. It was
- very beautiful, but it made me unhappy, the purity of his spirit was so
- sacred and the actual facts seemed such a sacrilege to it. Maria was
- nearer to the actual truth when she said that money was the only
- distinction. But Paolo had hold of an eternal truth, where hers was
- temporal. Only Paolo misapplied this eternal truth. He should not have
- given Giovanni the inferior status and a fat, mean Italian tradesman the
- superior. That was false, a real falsity. Maria knew it and hated it.
- But Paolo could not distinguish between the accident of riches and the
- aristocracy of the spirit. So Maria rejected him altogether, and went to
- the other extreme. We were all human beings like herself; naked, there
- was no distinction between us, no higher nor lower. But we were
- possessed of more money than she. And she had to steer her course
- between these two conceptions. The money alone made the real
- distinction, the separation; the being, the life made the common level.
- Paolo had the curious peasant's avarice also, but it was not meanness.
- It was a sort of religious conservation of his own power, his own self.
- Fortunately he could leave all business transactions on our account to
- Maria, so that his relation with us was purely ritualistic. He would
- have given me anything, trusting implicitly that I would fulfil my own
- nature as Signore, one of those more godlike, nearer the light of
- perfection than himself, a peasant. It was pure bliss to him to bring us
- the first-fruit of the garden, it was like laying it on an altar.
- And his fulfilment was in a fine, subtle, exquisite relationship, not of
- manners, but subtle interappreciation. He worshipped a finer
- understanding and a subtler tact. A further fineness and dignity and
- freedom in bearing was to him an approach towards the divine, so he
- loved men best of all, they fulfilled his soul. A woman was always a
- woman, and sex was a low level whereon he did not esteem himself. But a
- man, a doer, the instrument of God, he was really godlike.
- Paolo was a Conservative. For him the world was established and divine
- in its establishment. His vision grasped a small circle. A finer nature,
- a higher understanding, took in a greater circle, comprehended the
- whole. So that when Paolo was in relation to a man of further vision, he
- himself was extended towards the whole. Thus he was fulfilled. And his
- initial assumption was that every signore, every gentleman, was a man of
- further, purer vision than himself. This assumption was false. But
- Maria's assumption, that no one had a further vision, no one was more
- elect than herself, that we are all one flesh and blood and being, was
- even more false. Paolo was mistaken in actual life, but Maria was
- ultimately mistaken.
- Paolo, conservative as he was, believing that a priest must be a priest
- of God, yet very rarely went to church. And he used the religious oaths
- that Maria hated, even _Porca-Maria_. He always used oaths, either
- Bacchus or God or Mary or the Sacrament. Maria was always offended. Yet
- it was she who, in her soul, jeered at the Church and at religion. She
- wanted the human society as the absolute, without religious
- abstractions. So Paolo's oaths enraged her, because of their profanity,
- she said. But it was really because of their subscribing to another
- superhuman order. She jeered at the clerical people. She made a loud
- clamour of derision when the parish priest of the village above went
- down to the big village on the lake, and across the piazza, the quay,
- with two pigs in a sack on his shoulder. This was a real picture of the
- sacred minister to her.
- One day, when a storm had blown down an olive tree in front of the
- house, and Paolo and Giovanni were beginning to cut it up, this same
- priest of Mugiano came to San Gaudenzio. He was an iron-grey, thin,
- disreputable-looking priest, very talkative and loud and queer. He
- seemed like an old ne'er-do-well in priests' black, and he talked
- loudly, almost to himself, as drunken people do. At once _he_ must show
- the Fiori how to cut up the tree, he must have the axe from Paolo. He
- shouted to Maria for a glass of wine. She brought it out to him with a
- sort of insolent deference, insolent contempt of the man and traditional
- deference to the cloth. The priest drained the tumblerful of wine at one
- drink, his thin throat with its Adam's apple working. And he did not pay
- the penny.
- Then he stripped off his cassock and put away his hat, and, a ludicrous
- figure in ill-fitting black knee-breeches and a not very clean shirt, a
- red handkerchief round his neck, he proceeded to give great extravagant
- blows at the tree. He was like a caricature. In the doorway Maria was
- encouraging him rather jeeringly, whilst she winked at me. Marco was
- stifling his hysterical amusement in his mother's apron, and prancing
- with glee. Paolo and Giovanni stood by the fallen tree, very grave and
- unmoved, inscrutable, abstract. Then the youth came away to the doorway,
- with a flush mounting on his face and a grimace distorting its
- youngness. Only Paolo, unmoved and detached, stood by the tree with
- unchanging, abstract face, very strange, his eyes fixed in the ageless
- stare which is so characteristic.
- Meanwhile the priest swung drunken blows at the tree, his thin buttocks
- bending in the green-black broadcloth, supported on thin shanks, and
- thin throat growing dull purple in the red-knotted kerchief.
- Nevertheless he was doing the job. His face was wet with sweat. He
- wanted another glass of wine.
- He took no notice of us. He was strangely a local, even a mountebank
- figure, but entirely local, an appurtenance of the district.
- It was Maria who jeeringly told us the story of the priest, who shrugged
- her shoulders to imply that he was a contemptible figure. Paolo sat with
- the abstract look on his face, as of one who hears and does not hear, is
- not really concerned. He never opposed or contradicted her, but stayed
- apart. It was she who was violent and brutal in her ways. But sometimes
- Paolo went into a rage, and then Maria, everybody, was afraid. It was a
- white heavy rage, when his blue eyes shone unearthly, and his mouth
- opened with a curious drawn blindness of the old Furies. There was
- something of the cruelty of a falling mass of snow, heavy, horrible.
- Maria drew away, there was a silence. Then the avalanche was finished.
- They must have had some cruel fights before they learned to withdraw
- from each other so completely. They must have begotten Marco in hatred,
- terrible disintegrated opposition and otherness. And it was after this,
- after the child of their opposition was born, that Paolo went away to
- California, leaving his San Gaudenzio, travelling with several
- companions, like blind beasts, to Havre, and thence to New York, then to
- California. He stayed five years in the gold-mines, in a wild valley,
- living with a gang of Italians in a town of corrugated iron.
- All the while he had never really left San Gaudenzio. I asked him, 'Used
- you to think of it, the lake, the Monte Baldo, the laurel trees down the
- slope?' He tried to see what I wanted to know. Yes, he said--but
- uncertainly. I could see that he had never been really homesick. It had
- been very wretched on the ship going from Havre to New York. That he
- told me about. And he told me about the gold-mines, the galleries, the
- valley, the huts in the valley. But he had never really fretted for San
- Gaudenzio whilst he was in California.
- In real truth he was at San Gaudenzio all the time, his fate was riveted
- there. His going away was an excursion from reality, a kind of
- sleep-walking. He left his own reality there in the soil above the lake
- of Garda. That his body was in California, what did it matter? It was
- merely for a time, and for the sake of his own earth, his land. He would
- pay off the mortgage. But the gate at home was his gate all the time,
- his hand was on the latch.
- As for Maria, he had felt his duty towards her. She was part of his
- little territory, the rooted centre of the world. He sent her home the
- money. But it did not occur to him, in his soul, to miss her. He wanted
- her to be safe with the children, that was all. In his flesh perhaps he
- missed the woman. But his spirit was even more completely isolated since
- marriage. Instead of having united with each other, they had made each
- other more terribly distinct and separate. He could live alone
- eternally. It was his condition. His sex was functional, like eating and
- drinking. To take a woman, a prostitute at the camp, or not to take her,
- was no more vitally important than to get drunk or not to get drunk of a
- Sunday. And fairly often on Sunday Paolo got drunk. His world remained
- unaltered.
- But Maria suffered more bitterly. She was a young, powerful, passionate
- woman, and she was unsatisfied body and soul. Her soul's satisfaction
- became a bodily unsatisfaction. Her blood was heavy, violent, anarchic,
- insisting on the equality of the blood in all, and therefore on her own
- absolute right to satisfaction.
- She took a wine licence for San Gaudenzio, and she sold wine. There were
- many scandals about her. Somehow it did not matter very much, outwardly.
- The authorities were too divided among themselves to enforce public
- opinion. Between the clerical party and the radicals and the socialists,
- what canons were left that were absolute? Besides, these wild villages
- had always been ungoverned.
- Yet Maria suffered. Even she, according to her conviction belonged to
- Paolo. And she felt betrayed, betrayed and deserted. The iron had gone
- deep into her soul. Paolo had deserted her, she had been betrayed to
- other men for five years. There was something cruel and implacable in
- life. She sat sullen and heavy, for all her quick activity. Her soul was
- sullen and heavy.
- I could never believe Felicina was Paolo's child. She was an
- unprepossessing little girl, affected, cold, selfish, foolish. Maria and
- Paolo, with real Italian greatness, were warm and natural towards the
- child in her. But they did not love her in their very souls, she was the
- fruit of ash to them. And this must have been the reason that she was so
- self-conscious and foolish and affected, small child that she was.
- Paolo had come back from America a year before she was born--a year
- before she was born, Maria insisted. The husband and wife lived together
- in a relationship of complete negation. In his soul he was sad for her,
- and in her soul she felt annulled. He sat at evening in the
- chimney-seat, smoking, always pleasant and cheerful, not for a moment
- thinking he was unhappy. It had all taken place in his subconsciousness.
- But his eyebrows and eyelids were lifted in a kind of vacancy, his blue
- eyes were round and somehow finished, though he was so gentle and
- vigorous in body. But the very quick of him was killed. He was like a
- ghost in the house, with his loose throat and powerful limbs, his open,
- blue extinct eyes, and his musical, slightly husky voice, that seemed to
- sound out of the past.
- And Maria, stout and strong and handsome like a peasant woman, went
- about as if there were a weight on her, and her voice was high and
- strident. She, too, was finished in her life. But she remained unbroken,
- her will was like a hammer that destroys the old form.
- Giovanni was patiently labouring to learn a little English. Paolo knew
- only four or five words, the chief of which were 'a'right', 'boss',
- 'bread', and 'day'. The youth had these by heart, and was studying a
- little more. He was very graceful and lovable, but he found it difficult
- to learn. A confused light, like hot tears, would come into his eyes
- when he had again forgotten the phrase. But he carried the paper about
- with him, and he made steady progress.
- He would go to America, he also. Not for anything would he stay in San
- Gaudenzio. His dream was to be gone. He would come back. The world was
- not San Gaudenzio to Giovanni.
- The old order, the order of Paolo and of Pietro di Paoli, the
- aristocratic order of the supreme God, God the Father, the Lord, was
- passing away from the beautiful little territory. The household no
- longer receives its food, oil and wine and maize, from out of the earth
- in the motion of fate. The earth is annulled, and money takes its place.
- The landowner, who is the lieutenant of God and of Fate, like Abraham,
- he, too, is annulled. There is now the order of the rich, which
- supersedes the order of the Signoria.
- It is passing away from Italy as it has passed from England. The peasant
- is passing away, the workman is taking his place. The stability is gone.
- Paolo is a ghost, Maria is the living body. And the new order means
- sorrow for the Italian more even than it has meant for us. But he will
- have the new order.
- San Gaudenzio is already becoming a thing of the past. Below the house,
- where the land drops in sharp slips to the sheer cliff's edge, over
- which it is Maria's constant fear that Felicina will tumble, there are
- the deserted lemon gardens of the little territory, snug down below.
- They are invisible till one descends by tiny paths, sheer down into
- them. And there they stand, the pillars and walls erect, but a dead
- emptiness prevailing, lemon trees all dead, gone, a few vines in their
- place. It is only twenty years since the lemon trees finally perished of
- a disease and were not renewed. But the deserted terrace, shut between
- great walls, descending in their openness full to the south, to the lake
- and the mountain opposite, seem more terrible than Pompeii in their
- silence and utter seclusion. The grape hyacinths flower in the cracks,
- the lizards run, this strange place hangs suspended and forgotten,
- forgotten for ever, its erect pillars utterly meaningless.
- I used to sit and write in the great loft of the lemon-house, high up,
- far, far from the ground, the open front giving across the lake and the
- mountain snow opposite, flush with twilight. The old matting and boards,
- the old disused implements of lemon culture made shadows in the deserted
- place. Then there would come the call from the back, away above:
- '_Venga, venga mangiare_.'
- We ate in the kitchen, where the olive and laurel wood burned in the
- open fireplace. It was always soup in the evening. Then we played games
- or cards, all playing; or there was singing, with the accordion, and
- sometimes a rough mountain peasant with a guitar.
- But it is all passing away. Giovanni is in America, unless he has come
- back to the War. He will not want to live in San Gaudenzio when he is a
- man, he says. He and Marco will not spend their lives wringing a little
- oil and wine out of the rocky soil, even if they are not killed in the
- fighting which is going on at the end of the lake. In my loft by the
- lemon-houses now I should hear the guns. And Giovanni kissed me with a
- kind of supplication when I went on to the steamer, as if he were
- beseeching for a soul. His eyes were bright and clear and lit up with
- courage. He will make a good fight for the new soul he wants--that is,
- if they do not kill him in this War.
- _5_
- THE DANCE
- Maria had no real licence for San Gaudenzio, yet the peasants always
- called for wine. It is easy to arrange in Italy. The penny is paid
- another time.
- The wild old road that skirts the lake-side, scrambling always higher as
- the precipice becomes steeper, climbing and winding to the villages
- perched high up, passes under the high boundary-wall of San Gaudenzio,
- between that and the ruined church. But the road went just as much
- between the vines and past the house as outside, under the wall; for the
- high gates were always open, and men or women and mules come into the
- property to call at the door of the homestead. There was a loud shout,
- 'Ah--a--a--ah--Mari--a. O--O--Oh Pa'o!' from outside, another wild,
- inarticulate cry from within, and one of the Fiori appeared in the
- doorway to hail the newcomer.
- It was usually a man, sometimes a peasant from Mugiano, high up,
- sometimes a peasant from the wilds of the mountain, a wood-cutter, or a
- charcoal-burner. He came in and sat in the house-place, his glass of
- wine in his hand between his knees, or on the floor between his feet,
- and he talked in a few wild phrases, very shy, like a hawk indoors, and
- unintelligible in his dialect.
- Sometimes we had a dance. Then, for the wine to drink, three men came
- with mandolines and guitars, and sat in a corner playing their rapid
- tunes, while all danced on the dusty brick floor of the little parlour.
- No strange women were invited, only men; the young bloods from the big
- village on the lake, the wild men from above. They danced the slow,
- trailing, lilting polka-waltz round and round the small room, the
- guitars and mandolines twanging rapidly, the dust rising from the soft
- bricks. There were only the two English women: so men danced with men,
- as the Italians love to do. They love even better to dance with men,
- with a dear blood-friend, than with women.
- 'It's better like this, two men?' Giovanni says to me, his blue eyes
- hot, his face curiously tender.
- The wood-cutters and peasants take off their coats, their throats are
- bare. They dance with strange intentness, particularly if they have for
- partner an English Signora. Their feet in thick boots are curiously
- swift and significant. And it is strange to see the Englishwomen, as
- they dance with the peasants transfigured with a kind of brilliant
- surprise. All the while the peasants are very courteous, but quiet. They
- see the women dilate and flash, they think they have found a footing,
- they are certain. So the male dancers are quiet, but even grandiloquent,
- their feet nimble, their bodies wild and confident.
- They are at a loss when the two English Signoras move together and laugh
- excitedly at the end of the dance.
- 'Isn't it fine?'
- 'Fine! Their arms are like iron, carrying you round.'
- 'Yes! Yes! And the muscles on their shoulders! I never knew there were
- such muscles! I'm almost frightened.'
- 'But it's fine, isn't it? I'm getting into the dance.'
- 'Yes--yes--you've only to let them take you.'
- Then the glasses are put down, the guitars give their strange, vibrant,
- almost painful summons, and the dance begins again.
- It is a strange dance, strange and lilting, and changing as the music
- changed. But it had always a kind of leisurely dignity, a trailing kind
- of polka-waltz, intimate, passionate, yet never hurried, never violent
- in its passion, always becoming more intense. The women's faces changed
- to a kind of transported wonder, they were in the very rhythm of
- delight. From the soft bricks of the floor the red ochre rose in a thin
- cloud of dust, making hazy the shadowy dancers; the three musicians, in
- their black hats and their cloaks, sat obscurely in the corner, making a
- music that came quicker and quicker, making a dance that grew swifter
- and more intense, more subtle, the men seeming to fly and to implicate
- other strange inter-rhythmic dance into the women, the women drifting
- and palpitating as if their souls shook and resounded to a breeze that
- was subtly rushing upon them, through them; the men worked their feet,
- their thighs swifter, more vividly, the music came to an almost
- intolerable climax, there was a moment when the dance passed into a
- possession, the men caught up the women and swung them from the earth,
- leapt with them for a second, and then the next phase of the dance had
- begun, slower again, more subtly interwoven, taking perfect, oh,
- exquisite delight in every interrelated movement, a rhythm within a
- rhythm, a subtle approaching and drawing nearer to a climax, nearer,
- till, oh, there was the surpassing lift and swing of the women, when the
- woman's body seemed like a boat lifted over the powerful, exquisite wave
- of the man's body, perfect, for a moment, and then once more the slow,
- intense, nearer movement of the dance began, always nearer, nearer,
- always to a more perfect climax.
- And the women waited as if in transport for the climax, when they would
- be flung into a movement surpassing all movement. They were flung, borne
- away, lifted like a boat on a supreme wave, into the zenith and nave of
- the heavens, consummate.
- Then suddenly the dance crashed to an end, and the dancers stood
- stranded, lost, bewildered, on a strange shore. The air was full of red
- dust, half-lit by the lamp on the wall; the players in the corner were
- putting down their instruments to take up their glasses.
- And the dancers sat round the wall, crowding in the little room, faint
- with the transport of repeated ecstasy. There was a subtle smile on the
- face of the men, subtle, knowing, so finely sensual that the conscious
- eyes could scarcely look at it. And the women were dazed, like creatures
- dazzled by too much light. The light was still on their faces, like a
- blindness, a reeling, like a transfiguration. The men were bringing
- wine, on a little tin tray, leaning with their proud, vivid loins, their
- faces flickering with the same subtle smile. Meanwhile, Maria Fiori was
- splashing water, much water, on the red floor. There was the smell of
- water among the glowing, transfigured men and women who sat gleaming in
- another world, round the walls.
- The peasants have chosen their women. For the dark, handsome
- Englishwoman, who looks like a slightly malignant Madonna, comes Il
- Duro; for the '_bella bionda_', the wood-cutter. But the peasants have
- always to take their turn after the young well-to-do men from the
- village below.
- Nevertheless, they are confident. They cannot understand the
- middle-class diffidence of the young men who wear collars and ties and
- finger-rings.
- The wood-cutter from the mountain is of medium height, dark, thin, and
- hard as a hatchet, with eyes that are black like the very flaming thrust
- of night. He is quite a savage. There is something strange about his
- dancing, the violent way he works one shoulder. He has a wooden leg,
- from the knee-joint. Yet he dances well, and is inordinately proud. He
- is fierce as a bird, and hard with energy as a thunderbolt. He will
- dance with the blonde signora. But he never speaks. He is like some
- violent natural phenomenon rather than a person. The woman begins to
- wilt a little in his possession.
- '_È bello--il ballo?_' he asked at length, one direct, flashing
- question.
- '_Si--molto bello_,' cries the woman, glad to have speech again.
- The eyes of the wood-cutter flash like actual possession. He seems now
- to have come into his own. With all his senses, he is dominant, sure.
- He is inconceivably vigorous in body, and his dancing is almost perfect,
- with a little catch in it, owing to his lameness, which brings almost a
- pure intoxication. Every muscle in his body is supple as steel, supple,
- as strong as thunder, and yet so quick, so delicately swift, it is
- almost unbearable. As he draws near to the swing, the climax, the
- ecstasy, he seems to lie in wait, there is a sense of a great strength
- crouching ready. Then it rushes forth, liquid, perfect, transcendent,
- the woman swoons over in the dance, and it goes on, enjoyment, infinite,
- incalculable enjoyment. He is like a god, a strange natural phenomenon,
- most intimate and compelling, wonderful.
- But he is not a human being. The woman, somewhere shocked in her
- independent soul, begins to fall away from him. She has another being,
- which he has not touched, and which she will fall back upon. The dance
- is over, she will fall back on herself. It is perfect, too perfect.
- During the next dance, while she is in the power of the educated Ettore,
- a perfect and calculated voluptuary, who knows how much he can get out
- of this Northern woman, and only how much, the wood-cutter stands on the
- edge of the darkness, in the open doorway, and watches. He is fixed upon
- her, established, perfect. And all the while she is aware of the
- insistent hawk-like poising of the face of the wood-cutter, poised on
- the edge of the darkness, in the doorway, in possession,
- unrelinquishing.
- And she is angry. There is something stupid, absurd, in the hard,
- talon-like eyes watching so fiercely and so confidently in the doorway,
- sure, unmitigated. Has the creature no sense?
- The woman reacts from him. For some time she will take no notice of him.
- But he waits, fixed. Then she comes near to him, and his will seems to
- take hold of her. He looks at her with a strange, proud, inhuman
- confidence, as if his influence with her was already accomplished.
- '_Venga--venga un po'_,' he says, jerking his head strangely to the
- darkness.
- 'What?' she replies, and passes shaken and dilated and brilliant,
- consciously ignoring him, passes away among the others, among those
- who are safe.
- There is food in the kitchen, great hunks of bread, sliced sausage that
- Maria has made, wine, and a little coffee. But only the quality come to
- eat. The peasants may not come in. There is eating and drinking in the
- little house, the guitars are silent. It is eleven o'clock.
- Then there is singing, the strange bestial singing of these hills.
- Sometimes the guitars can play an accompaniment, but usually not. Then
- the men lift up their heads and send out the high, half-howling music,
- astounding. The words are in dialect. They argue among themselves for a
- moment: will the Signoria understand? They sing. The Signoria does not
- understand in the least. So with a strange, slightly malignant triumph,
- the men sing all the verses of their song, sitting round the walls of
- the little parlour. Their throats move, their faces have a slight
- mocking smile. The boy capers in the doorway like a faun, with glee, his
- straight black hair falling over his forehead. The elder brother sits
- straight and flushed, but even his eyes glitter with a kind of yellow
- light of laughter. Paolo also sits quiet, with the invisible smile on
- his face.' Only Maria, large and active, prospering now, keeps
- collected, ready to order a shrill silence in the same way as she orders
- the peasants, violently, to keep their places.
- The boy comes to me and says:
- 'Do you know, Signore, what they are singing?'
- 'No,' I say.
- So he capers with furious glee. The men with the watchful eyes, all
- roused, sit round the wall and sing more distinctly:
- _Si verrà la primavera
- Fiorann' le mandoline,
- Vienn' di basso le Trentine
- Coi 'taliani far' l'amor._
- But the next verses are so improper that I pretend not to understand.
- The women, with wakened, dilated faces, are listening, listening hard,
- their two faces beautiful in their attention, as if listening to
- something magical, a long way off. And the men sitting round the wall
- sing more plainly, coming nearer to the correct Italian. The song comes
- loud and vibrating and maliciously from their reedy throats, it
- penetrates everybody. The foreign women can understand the sound, they
- can feel the malicious, suggestive mockery. But they cannot catch the
- words. The smile becomes more dangerous on the faces of the men.
- Then Maria Fiori sees that I have understood, and she cries, in her
- loud, overriding voice:
- '_Basta--basta._
- The men get up, straighten their bodies with a curious, offering
- movement. The guitars and mandolines strike the vibrating strings. But
- the vague Northern reserve has come over the Englishwomen. They dance
- again, but without the fusion in the dance. They have had enough.
- The musicians are thanked, they rise and go into the night. The men pass
- off in pairs. But the wood-cutter, whose name and whose nickname I could
- never hear, still hovered on the edge of the darkness.
- Then Maria sent him also away, complaining that he was too wild,
- _proprio selvatico_, and only the 'quality' remained, the well-to-do
- youths from below. There was a little more coffee, and a talking, a
- story of a man who had fallen over a declivity in a lonely part going
- home drunk in the evening, and had lain unfound for eighteen hours. Then
- a story of a donkey who had kicked a youth in the chest and killed him.
- But the women were tired, they would go to bed. Still the two young men
- would not go away. We all went out to look at the night.
- The stars were very bright overhead, the mountain opposite and the
- mountains behind us faintly outlined themselves on the sky. Below, the
- lake was a black gulf. A little wind blew cold from the Adige.
- In the morning the visitors had gone. They had insisted on staying the
- night. They had eaten eight eggs each and much bread at one o'clock in
- the morning. Then they had gone to sleep, lying on the floor in the
- sitting-room.
- In the early sunshine they had drunk coffee and gone down to the village
- on the lake. Maria was very pleased. She would have made a good deal of
- money. The young men were rich. Her cupidity seemed like her
- very blossom.
- _6_
- IL DURO
- The first time I saw Il Duro was on a sunny day when there came up a
- party of pleasure-makers to San Gaudenzio. They were three women and
- three men. The women were in cotton frocks, one a large, dark, florid
- woman in pink, the other two rather insignificant. The men I scarcely
- noticed at first, except that two were young and one elderly.
- They were a queer party, even on a feast day, coming up purely for
- pleasure, in the morning, strange, and slightly uncertain, advancing
- between the vines. They greeted Maria and Paolo in loud, coarse voices.
- There was something blowsy and uncertain and hesitating about the women
- in particular, which made one at once notice them.
- Then a picnic was arranged for them out of doors, on the grass. They sat
- just in front of the house, under the olive tree, beyond the well. It
- should have been pretty, the women in their cotton frocks, and their
- friends, sitting with wine and food in the spring sunshine. But somehow
- it was not: it was hard and slightly ugly.
- But since they were picnicking out of doors, we must do so too. We were
- at once envious. But Maria was a little unwilling, and then she set a
- table for us.
- The strange party did not speak to us, they seemed slightly uneasy and
- angry at our presence. I asked Maria who they were. She lifted her
- shoulders, and, after a second's cold pause, said they were people from
- down below, and then, in her rather strident, shrill, slightly bitter,
- slightly derogatory voice, she added:
- 'They are not people for you, signore. You don't know them.'
- She spoke slightly angrily and contemptuously of them, rather
- protectively of me. So that vaguely I gathered that they were not quite
- 'respectable'.
- Only one man came into the house. He was very handsome, beautiful
- rather, a man of thirty-two or-three, with a clear golden skin, and
- perfectly turned face, something godlike. But the expression was
- strange. His hair was jet black and fine and smooth, glossy as a bird's
- wing, his brows were beautifully drawn, calm above his grey eyes, that
- had long dark lashes.
- His eyes, however, had a sinister light in them, a pale, slightly
- repelling gleam, very much like a god's pale-gleaming eyes, with the
- same vivid pallor. And all his face had the slightly malignant,
- suffering look of a satyr. Yet he was very beautiful.
- He walked quickly and surely, with his head rather down, passing from
- his desire to his object, absorbed, yet curiously indifferent, as if the
- transit were in a strange world, as if none of what he was doing were
- worth the while. Yet he did it for his own pleasure, and the light on
- his face, a pale, strange gleam through his clear skin, remained like a
- translucent smile, unchanging as time.
- He seemed familiar with the household, he came and fetched wine at his
- will. Maria was angry with him. She railed loudly and violently. He was
- unchanged. He went out with the wine to the party on the grass. Maria
- regarded them all with some hostility.
- They drank a good deal out there in the sunshine. The women and the
- older man talked floridly. Il Duro crouched at the feast in his curious
- fashion--he had strangely flexible loins, upon which he seemed to crouch
- forward. But he was separate, like an animal that remains quite single,
- no matter where it is.
- The party remained until about two o'clock. Then, slightly flushed, it
- moved on in a ragged group up to the village beyond. I do not know if
- they went to one of the inns of the stony village, or to the large
- strange house which belonged to the rich young grocer of the village
- below, a house kept only for feasts and riots, uninhabited for the most
- part. Maria would tell me nothing about them. Only the young well-to-do
- grocer, who had lived in Vienna, the Bertolotti, came later in the
- afternoon inquiring for the party.
- And towards sunset I saw the elderly man of the group stumbling home
- very drunk down the path, after the two women, who had gone on in front.
- Then Paolo sent Giovanni to see the drunken one safely past the
- landslip, which was dangerous. Altogether it was an unsatisfactory
- business, very much like any other such party in any other country.
- Then in the evening Il Duro came in. His name is Faustino, but everybody
- in the village has a nickname, which is almost invariably used. He came
- in and asked for supper. We had all eaten. So he ate a little food alone
- at the table, whilst we sat round the fire.
- Afterwards we played 'Up, Jenkins'. That was the one game we played with
- the peasants, except that exciting one of theirs, which consists in
- shouting in rapid succession your guesses at the number of fingers
- rapidly spread out and shut into the hands again upon the table.
- Il Duro joined in the game. And that was because he had been in America,
- and now was rich. He felt he could come near to the strange signori. But
- he was always inscrutable.
- It was queer to look at the hands spread on the table: the Englishwomen,
- having rings on their soft fingers; the large fresh hands of the elder
- boy, the brown paws of the younger; Paolo's distorted great hard hands
- of a peasant; and the big, dark brown, animal, shapely hands
- of Faustino.
- He had been in America first for two years and then for five
- years--seven years altogether--but he only spoke a very little English.
- He was always with Italians. He had served chiefly in a flag factory,
- and had had very little to do save to push a trolley with flags from the
- dyeing-room to the drying-room I believe it was this.
- Then he had come home from America with a fair amount of money, he had
- taken his uncle's garden, had inherited his uncle's little house, and he
- lived quite alone.
- He was rich, Maria said, shouting in her strident voice. He at once
- disclaimed it, peasant-wise. But before the signori he was glad also to
- appear rich. He was mean, that was more, Maria cried, half-teasing, half
- getting at him.
- He attended to his garden, grew vegetables all the year round, lived in
- his little house, and in spring made good money as a vine-grafter: he
- was an expert vine-grafter.
- After the boys had gone to bed he sat and talked to me. He was curiously
- attractive and curiously beautiful, but somehow like stone in his clear
- colouring and his clear-cut face. His temples, with the black hair, were
- distinct and fine as a work of art.
- But always his eyes had this strange, half-diabolic, half-tortured pale
- gleam, like a goat's, and his mouth was shut almost uglily, his cheeks
- stern. His moustache was brown, his teeth strong and spaced. The women
- said it was a pity his moustache was brown.
- '_Peccato!--sa, per bellezza, i baffi neri--ah-h!_'
- Then a long-drawn exclamation of voluptuous appreciation.
- 'You live quite alone?' I said to him.
- He did. And even when he had been ill he was alone. He had been ill two
- years before. His cheeks seemed to harden like marble and to become pale
- at the thought. He was afraid, like marble with fear.
- 'But why,' I said, 'why do you live alone? You are sad--_è triste_.'
- He looked at me with his queer, pale eyes. I felt a great static misery
- in him, something very strange.
- '_Triste!_' he repeated, stiffening up, hostile. I could not understand.
- '_Vuol' dire che hai l'aria dolorosa_,' cried Maria, like a chorus
- interpreting. And there was always a sort of loud ring of challenge
- somewhere in her voice.
- 'Sad,' I said in English.
- 'Sad I' he repeated, also in English. And he did not smile or change,
- only his face seemed to become more stone-like. And he only looked at
- me, into my eyes, with the long, pale, steady, inscrutable look of a
- goat, I can only repeat, something stone-like.
- 'Why,' I said, 'don't you marry? Man doesn't live alone.'
- 'I don't marry,' he said to me, in his emphatic, deliberate, cold
- fashion, 'because I've seen too much. _Ho visto troppo._'
- 'I don't understand,' I said.
- Yet I could feel that Paolo, sitting silent, like a monolith also, in
- the chimney opening, he understood: Maria also understood.
- Il Duro looked again steadily into my eyes.
- '_Ho visto troppo_,' he repeated, and the words seemed engraved on
- stone. 'I've seen too much.'
- 'But you can marry,' I said, 'however much you have seen, if you have
- seen all the world.'
- He watched me steadily, like a strange creature looking at me.
- 'What woman?' he said to me.
- 'You can find a woman--there are plenty of women,' I said.
- 'Not for me,' he said. 'I have known too many. I've known too much, I
- can marry nobody.'
- 'Do you dislike women?' I said.
- 'No--quite otherwise. I don't think ill of them.'
- 'Then why can't you marry? Why must you live alone?'
- 'Why live with a woman?' he said to me, and he looked mockingly. 'Which
- woman is it to be?'
- 'You can find her,' I said. 'There are many women.'
- Again he shook his head in the stony, final fashion.
- 'Not for me. I have known too much.'
- 'But does that prevent you from marrying?'
- He looked at me steadily, finally. And I could see it was impossible for
- us to understand each other, or for me to understand him. I could not
- understand the strange white gleam of his eyes, where it came from.
- Also I knew he liked me very much, almost loved me, which again was
- strange and puzzling. It was as if he were a fairy, a faun, and had no
- soul. But he gave me a feeling of vivid sadness, a sadness that gleamed
- like phosphorescence. He himself was not sad. There was a completeness
- about him, about the pallid otherworld he inhabited, which excluded
- sadness. It was too complete, too final, too defined. There was no
- yearning, no vague merging off into mistiness.... He was clear and fine
- as semi-transparent rock, as a substance in moonlight. He seemed like a
- crystal that has achieved its final shape and has nothing more
- to achieve.
- That night he slept on the floor of the sitting-room. In the morning he
- was gone. But a week after he came again, to graft the vines.
- All the morning and the afternoon he was among the vines, crouching
- before them, cutting them back with his sharp, bright knife, amazingly
- swift and sure, like a god. It filled me with a sort of panic to see him
- crouched flexibly, like some strange animal god, doubled on his
- haunches, before the young vines, and swiftly, vividly, without thought,
- cut, cut, cut at the young budding shoots, which fell unheeded on to the
- earth. Then again he strode with his curious half-goatlike movement
- across the garden, to prepare the lime.
- He mixed the messy stuff, cow-dung and lime and water and earth,
- carefully with his hands, as if he understood that too. He was not a
- worker. He was a creature in intimate communion with the sensible world,
- knowing purely by touch the limey mess he mixed amongst, knowing as if
- by relation between that soft matter and the matter of himself.
- Then again he strode over the earth, a gleaming piece of earth himself,
- moving to the young vines. Quickly, with a few clean cuts of the knife,
- he prepared the new shoot, which he had picked out of a handful which
- lay beside him on the ground; he went finely to the quick of the plant,
- inserted the graft, then bound it up, fast, hard.
- It was like God grafting the life of man upon the body of the earth,
- intimately conjuring with his own flesh.
- All the while Paolo stood by, somehow excluded from the mystery, talking
- to me, to Faustino. And Il Duro answered easily, as if his mind were
- disengaged. It was his senses that were absorbed in the sensible life of
- the plant, and the lime and the cow-dung he handled.
- Watching him, watching his absorbed, bestial, and yet godlike crouching
- before the plant, as if he were the god of lower life, I somehow
- understood his isolation, why he did not marry. Pan and the ministers of
- Pan do not marry, the sylvan gods. They are single and isolated in
- their being.
- It is in the spirit that marriage takes place. In the flesh there is
- connexion, but only in the spirit is there a new thing created out of
- two different antithetic things. In the body I am conjoined with the
- woman. But in the spirit my conjunction with her creates a third thing,
- an absolute, a Word, which is neither me nor her, nor of me nor of her,
- but which is absolute.
- And Faustino had none of this spirit. In him sensation itself was
- absolute--not spiritual consummation, but physical sensation. So he
- could not marry, it was not for him. He belonged to the god Pan, to the
- absolute of the senses.
- All the while his beauty, so perfect and so defined, fascinated me, a
- strange static perfection about him. But his movements, whilst they
- fascinated, also repelled. I can always see him crouched before the
- vines on his haunches, his haunches doubled together in a complete
- animal unconsciousness, his face seeming in its strange golden pallor
- and its hardness of line, with the gleaming black of the fine hair on
- the brow and temples, like something reflective, like the reflecting
- surface of a stone that gleams out of the depths of night. It was like
- darkness revealed in its steady, unchanging pallor.
- Again he stayed through the evening, having quarrelled once more with
- the Maria about money. He quarrelled violently, yet coldly. There was
- something terrifying in it. And as soon as the matter of dispute was
- settled, all trace of interest or feeling vanished from him.
- Yet he liked, above all things, to be near the English signori. They
- seemed to exercise a sort of magnetic attraction over him. It was
- something of the purely physical world, as a magnetized needle swings
- towards soft iron. He was quite helpless in the relation. Only by
- mechanical attraction he gravitated into line with us.
- But there was nothing between us except our complete difference. It was
- like night and day flowing together.
- _7_
- JOHN
- Besides Il Duro, we found another Italian who could speak English, this
- time quite well. We had walked about four or five miles up the lake,
- getting higher and higher. Then quite suddenly, on the shoulder of a
- bluff far up, we came on a village, icy cold, and as if forgotten.
- We went into the inn to drink something hot. The fire of olive sticks
- was burning in the open chimney, one or two men were talking at a table,
- a young woman with a baby stood by the fire watching something boil in a
- large pot. Another woman was seen in the house-place beyond.
- In the chimney-seats sat a young mule-driver, who had left his two mules
- at the door of the inn, and opposite him an elderly stout man. They got
- down and offered us the seats of honour, which we accepted with
- due courtesy.
- The chimneys are like the wide, open chimney-places of old English
- cottages, but the hearth is raised about a foot and a half or two feet
- from the floor, so that the fire is almost level with the hands; and
- those who sit in the chimney-seats are raised above the audience in the
- room, something like two gods flanking the fire, looking out of the cave
- of ruddy darkness into the open, lower world of the room.
- We asked for coffee with milk and rum. The stout landlord took a seat
- near us below. The comely young woman with the baby took the tin
- coffee-pot that stood among the grey ashes, put in fresh coffee among
- the old bottoms, filled it with water, then pushed it more into
- the fire.
- The landlord turned to us with the usual naïve, curious deference, and
- the usual question:
- 'You are Germans?'
- 'English.'
- 'Ah--_Inglesi_.'
- Then there is a new note of cordiality--or so I always imagine--and the
- rather rough, cattle-like men who are sitting with their wine round the
- table look up more amicably. They do not like being intruded upon. Only
- the landlord is always affable.
- 'I have a son who speaks English,' he says: he is a handsome, courtly
- old man, of the Falstaff sort.
- 'Oh!'
- 'He has been in America.'
- 'And where is he now?'
- 'He is at home. O--Nicoletta, where is the Giovann'?'
- The comely young woman with the baby came in.
- 'He is with the band,' she said.
- The old landlord looked at her with pride.
- 'This is my daughter-in-law,' he said.
- She smiled readily to the Signora.
- 'And the baby?' we asked.
- '_Mio figlio_,' cried the young woman, in the strong, penetrating voice
- of these women. And she came forward to show the child to the Signora.
- It was a bonny baby: the whole company was united in adoration and
- service of the bambino. There was a moment of suspension, when religious
- submission seemed to come over the inn-room.
- Then the Signora began to talk, and it broke upon the Italian
- child-reverence.
- 'What is he called?'
- 'Oscare,' came the ringing note of pride. And the mother talked to the
- baby in dialect. All, men and women alike, felt themselves glorified by
- the presence of the child.
- At last the coffee in the tin coffee-pot was boiling and frothing out of
- spout and lid. The milk in the little copper pan was also hot, among the
- ashes. So we had our drink at last.
- The landlord was anxious for us to see Giovanni, his son. There was a
- village band performing up the street, in front of the house of a
- colonel who had come home wounded from Tripoli. Everybody in the village
- was wildly proud about the colonel and about the brass band, the music
- of which was execrable.
- We just looked into the street. The band of uncouth fellows was playing
- the same tune over and over again before a desolate, newish house. A
- crowd of desolate, forgotten villagers stood round in the cold upper
- air. It seemed altogether that the place was forgotten by God and man.
- But the landlord, burly, courteous, handsome, pointed out with a
- flourish the Giovanni, standing in the band playing a cornet. The band
- itself consisted only of five men, rather like beggars in the street.
- But Giovanni was the strangest! He was tall and thin and somewhat
- German-looking, wearing shabby American clothes and a very high double
- collar and a small American crush hat. He looked entirely like a
- ne'er-do-well who plays a violin in the street, dressed in the most
- down-at-heel, sordid respectability.
- 'That is he--you see, Signore--the young one under the balcony.'
- The father spoke with love and pride, and the father was a gentleman,
- like Falstaff, a pure gentleman. The daughter-in-law also peered out to
- look at Il Giovann', who was evidently a figure of repute, in his
- sordid, degenerate American respectability. Meanwhile, this figure of
- repute blew himself red in the face, producing staccato strains on his
- cornet. And the crowd stood desolate and forsaken in the cold, upper
- afternoon.
- Then there was a sudden rugged '_Evviva, Evviva_!' from the people, the
- band stopped playing, somebody valiantly broke into a line of the song:
- _Tripoli, sarà italiana,
- Sarà italiana al rombo del cannon'._
- The colonel had appeared on the balcony, a smallish man, very yellow in
- the face, with grizzled black hair and very shabby legs. They all seemed
- so sordidly, hopelessly shabby.
- He suddenly began to speak, leaning forward, hot and feverish and
- yellow, upon the iron rail of the balcony. There was something hot and
- marshy and sick about him, slightly repulsive, less than human. He told
- his fellow-villagers how he loved them, how, when he lay uncovered on
- the sands of Tripoli, week after week, he had known they were watching
- him from the Alpine height of the village, he could feel that where he
- was they were all looking. When the Arabs came rushing like things gone
- mad, and he had received his wound, he had known that in his own
- village, among his own dear ones, there was recovery. Love would heal
- the wounds, the home country was a lover who would heal all her sons'
- wounds with love.
- Among the grey desolate crowd were sharp, rending 'Bravos!'--the people
- were in tears--the landlord at my side was repeating softly,
- abstractedly: '_Caro--caro--Ettore, caro colonello_--' and when it was
- finished, and the little colonel with shabby, humiliated legs was gone
- in, he turned to me and said, with challenge that almost frightened me:
- '_Un brav' uomo_.'
- '_Bravissimo_,' I said.
- Then we, too, went indoors.
- It was all, somehow, grey and hopeless and acrid, unendurable.
- The colonel, poor devil--we knew him afterwards--is now dead. It is
- strange that he is dead. There is something repulsive to me in the
- thought of his lying dead: such a humiliating, somehow degraded corpse.
- Death has no beauty in Italy, unless it be violent. The death of man or
- woman through sickness is an occasion of horror, repulsive. They belong
- entirely to life, they are so limited to life, these people.
- Soon the Giovanni came home, and took his cornet upstairs. Then he came
- to see us. He was an ingenuous youth, sordidly shabby and dirty. His
- fair hair was long and uneven, his very high starched collar made one
- aware that his neck and his ears were not clean, his American crimson
- tie was ugly, his clothes looked as if they had been kicking about on
- the floor for a year.
- Yet his blue eyes were warm and his manner and speech very gentle.
- 'You will speak English with us,' I said.
- 'Oh,' he said, smiling and shaking his head, 'I could speak English very
- well. But it is two years that I don't speak it now, over two years now,
- so I don't speak it.'
- 'But you speak it very well.'
- 'No. It is two years that I have not spoke, not a word--so, you see, I
- have--'
- 'You have forgotten it? No, you haven't. It will quickly come back.'
- 'If I hear it--when I go to America--then I shall--I shall--'
- 'You will soon pick it up.'
- 'Yes--I shall pick it up.'
- The landlord, who had been watching with pride, now went away. The wife
- also went away, and we were left with the shy, gentle, dirty, and
- frowsily-dressed Giovanni.
- He laughed in his sensitive, quick fashion.
- 'The women in America, when they came into the store, they said, "Where
- is John, where is John?" Yes, they liked me.'
- And he laughed again, glancing with vague, warm blue eyes, very shy,
- very coiled upon himself with sensitiveness.
- He had managed a store in America, in a smallish town. I glanced at his
- reddish, smooth, rather knuckly hands, and thin wrists in the frayed
- cuff. They were real shopman's hands.
- The landlord brought some special feast-day cake, so overjoyed he was to
- have his Giovanni speaking English with the Signoria.
- When we went away, we asked 'John' to come down to our villa to see us.
- We scarcely expected him to turn up.
- Yet one morning he appeared, at about half past nine, just as we were
- finishing breakfast. It was sunny and warm and beautiful, so we asked
- him please to come with us picnicking.
- He was a queer shoot, again, in his unkempt longish hair and slovenly
- clothes, a sort of very vulgar down-at-heel American in appearance. And
- he was transported with shyness. Yet ours was the world he had chosen as
- his own, so he took his place bravely and simply, a hanger-on.
- We climbed up the water-course in the mountain-side, up to a smooth
- little lawn under the olive trees, where daisies were flowering and
- gladioli were in bud. It was a tiny little lawn of grass in a level
- crevice, and sitting there we had the world below us--the lake, the
- distant island, the far-off low Verona shore.
- Then 'John' began to talk, and he talked continuously, like a foreigner,
- not saying the things he would have said in Italian, but following the
- suggestion and scope of his limited English.
- In the first place, he loved his father--it was 'my father, my father'
- always. His father had a little shop as well as the inn in the village
- above. So John had had some education. He had been sent to Brescia and
- then to Verona to school, and there had taken his examinations to become
- a civil engineer. He was clever, and could pass his examinations. But he
- never finished his course. His mother died, and his father,
- disconsolate, had wanted him at home. Then he had gone back, when he was
- sixteen or seventeen, to the village beyond the lake, to be with his
- father and to look after the shop.
- 'But didn't you mind giving up all your work?' I said.
- He did not quite understand.
- 'My father wanted me to come back,' he said.
- It was evident that Giovanni had had no definite conception of what he
- was doing or what he wanted to do. His father, wishing to make a
- gentleman of him, had sent him to school in Verona. By accident he had
- been moved on into the engineering course. When it all fizzled to an
- end, and he returned half-baked to the remote, desolate village of the
- mountain-side, he was not disappointed or chagrined. He had never
- conceived of a coherent purposive life. Either one stayed in the
- village, like a lodged stone, or one made random excursions into the
- world, across the world. It was all aimless and purposeless.
- So he had stayed a while with his father, then he had gone, just as
- aimlessly, with a party of men who were emigrating to America. He had
- taken some money, had drifted about, living in the most comfortless,
- wretched fashion, then he had found a place somewhere in Pennsylvania,
- in a dry goods store. This was when he was seventeen or eighteen
- years old.
- All this seemed to have happened to him without his being very much
- affected, at least consciously. His nature was simple and self-complete.
- Yet not so self-complete as that of Il Duro or Paolo. They had passed
- through the foreign world and been quite untouched. Their souls were
- static, it was the world that had flowed unstable by.
- But John was more sensitive, he had come more into contact with his new
- surroundings. He had attended night classes almost every evening, and
- had been taught English like a child. He had loved the American free
- school, the teachers, the work.
- But he had suffered very much in America. With his curious,
- over-sensitive, wincing laugh, he told us how the boys had followed him
- and jeered at him, calling after him, 'You damn Dago, you damn Dago.'
- They had stopped him and his friend in the street and taken away their
- hats, and spat into them. So that at last he had gone mad. They were
- youths and men who always tortured him, using bad language which
- startled us very much as he repeated it, there on the little lawn under
- the olive trees, above the perfect lake: English obscenities and abuse
- so coarse and startling that we bit our lips, shocked almost into
- laughter, whilst John, simple and natural, and somehow, for all his long
- hair and dirty appearance, flower-like in soul, repeated to us these
- things which may never be repeated in decent company.
- 'Oh,' he said, 'at last, I get mad. When they come one day, shouting,
- "You damn Dago, dirty dog," and will take my hat again, oh, I get mad,
- and I would kill them, I would kill them, I am so mad. I run to them,
- and throw one to the floor, and I tread on him while I go upon another,
- the biggest. Though they hit me and kick me all over, I feel nothing, I
- am mad. I throw the biggest to the floor, a man; he is older than I am,
- and I hit him so hard I would kill him. When the others see it they are
- afraid, they throw stones and hit me on the face. But I don't feel it--I
- don't know nothing. I hit the man on the floor, I almost kill him. I
- forget everything except I will kill him--'
- 'But you didn't?'
- 'No--I don't know--' and he laughed his queer, shaken laugh. 'The other
- man that was with me, my friend, he came to me and we went away. Oh, I
- was mad. I was completely mad. I would have killed them.'
- He was trembling slightly, and his eyes were dilated with a strange
- greyish-blue fire that was very painful and elemental. He looked beside
- himself. But he was by no means mad.
- We were shaken by the vivid, lambent excitement of the youth, we wished
- him to forget. We were shocked, too, in our souls to see the pure
- elemental flame shaken out of his gentle, sensitive nature. By his
- slight, crinkled laugh we could see how much he had suffered. He had
- gone out and faced the world, and he had kept his place, stranger and
- Dago though he was.
- 'They never came after me no more, not all the while I was there.'
- Then he said he became the foreman in the store--at first he was only
- assistant. It was the best store in the town, and many English ladies
- came, and some Germans. He liked the English ladies very much: they
- always wanted him to be in the store. He wore white clothes there, and
- they would say:
- 'You look very nice in the white coat, John'; or else:
- 'Let John come, he can find it'; or else they said:
- 'John speaks like a born American.'
- This pleased him very much.
- In the end, he said, he earned a hundred dollars a month. He lived with
- the extraordinary frugality of the Italians, and had quite a lot
- of money.
- He was not like Il Duro. Faustino had lived in a state of miserliness
- almost in America, but then he had had his debauches of shows and wine
- and carousals. John went chiefly to the schools, in one of which he was
- even asked to teach Italian. His knowledge of his own language was
- remarkable and most unusual!
- 'But what,' I asked, 'brought you back?'
- 'It was my father. You see, if I did not come to have my military
- service, I must stay till I am forty. So I think perhaps my father will
- be dead, I shall never see him. So I came.'
- He had come home when he was twenty to fulfil his military duties. At
- home he had married. He was very fond of his wife, but he had no
- conception of love in the old sense. His wife was like the past, to
- which he was wedded. Out of her he begot his child, as out of the past.
- But the future was all beyond her, apart from her. He was going away
- again, now, to America. He had been some nine months at home after his
- military service was over. He had no more to do. Now he was leaving his
- wife and child and his father to go to America.
- 'But why,' I said, 'why? You are not poor, you can manage the shop in
- your village.'
- 'Yes,' he said. 'But I will go to America. Perhaps I shall go into the
- store again, the same.'
- 'But is it not just the same as managing the shop at home?'
- 'No--no--it is quite different.'
- Then he told us how he bought goods in Brescia and in Said for the shop
- at home, how he had rigged up a funicular with the assistance of the
- village, an overhead wire by which you could haul the goods up the face
- of the cliffs right high up, to within a mile of the village. He was
- very proud of this. And sometimes he himself went down the funicular to
- the water's edge, to the boat, when he was in a hurry. This also
- pleased him.
- But he was going to Brescia this day to see about going again to
- America. Perhaps in another month he would be gone.
- It was a great puzzle to me why he would go. He could not say himself.
- He would stay four or five years, then he would come home again to see
- his father--and his wife and child.
- There was a strange, almost frightening destiny upon him, which seemed
- to take him away, always away from home, from the past, to that great,
- raw America. He seemed scarcely like a person with individual choice,
- more like a creature under the influence of fate which was
- disintegrating the old life and precipitating him, a fragment
- inconclusive, into the new chaos.
- He submitted to it all with a perfect unquestioning simplicity, never
- even knowing that he suffered, that he must suffer disintegration from
- the old life. He was moved entirely from within, he never questioned his
- inevitable impulse.
- 'They say to me, "Don't go--don't go"--' he shook his head. 'But I say I
- will go.'
- And at that it was finished.
- So we saw him off at the little quay, going down the lake. He would
- return at evening, and be pulled up in his funicular basket. And in a
- month's time he would be standing on the same lake steamer going
- to America.
- Nothing was more painful than to see him standing there in his degraded,
- sordid American clothes, on the deck of the steamer, waving us good-bye,
- belonging in his final desire to our world, the world of consciousness
- and deliberate action. With his candid, open, unquestioning face, he
- seemed like a prisoner being conveyed from one form of life to another,
- or like a soul in trajectory, that has not yet found a resting-place.
- What were wife and child to him?--they were the last steps of the past.
- His father was the continent behind him; his wife and child the
- foreshore of the past; but his face was set outwards, away from it
- all--whither, neither he nor anybody knew, but he called it America.
- _Italians in Exile_
- When I was in Constance the weather was misty and enervating and
- depressing, it was no pleasure to travel on the big flat desolate lake.
- When I went from Constance, it was on a small steamer down the Rhine to
- Schaffhausen. That was beautiful. Still, the mist hung over the waters,
- over the wide shallows of the river, and the sun, coming through the
- morning, made lovely yellow lights beneath the bluish haze, so that it
- seemed like the beginning of the world. And there was a hawk in the
- upper air fighting with two crows, or two rooks. Ever they rose higher
- and higher, the crow flickering above the attacking hawk, the fight
- going on like some strange symbol in the sky, the Germans on deck
- watching with pleasure.
- Then we passed out of sight between wooded banks and under bridges where
- quaint villages of old romance piled their red and coloured pointed
- roofs beside the water, very still, remote, lost in the vagueness of the
- past. It could not be that they were real. Even when the boat put in to
- shore, and the customs officials came to look, the village remained
- remote in the romantic past of High Germany, the Germany of fairy tales
- and minstrels and craftsmen. The poignancy of the past was almost
- unbearable, floating there in colour upon the haze of the river.
- We went by some swimmers, whose white shadowy bodies trembled near the
- side of the steamer under water. One man with a round, fair head lifted
- his face and one arm from the water and shouted a greeting to us, as if
- he were a Niebelung, saluting with bright arm lifted from the water, his
- face laughing, the fair moustache hanging over his mouth. Then his white
- body swirled in the water, and he was gone, swimming with the
- side stroke.
- Schaffhausen the town, half old and bygone, half modern, with breweries
- and industries, that is not very real. Schaffhausen Falls, with their
- factory in the midst and their hotel at the bottom, and the general
- cinematograph effect, they are ugly.
- It was afternoon when I set out to walk from the Falls to Italy, across
- Switzerland. I remember the big, fat, rather gloomy fields of this part
- of Baden, damp and unliving. I remember I found some apples under a tree
- in a field near a railway embankment, then some mushrooms, and I ate
- both. Then I came on to a long, desolate high-road, with dreary,
- withered trees on either side, and flanked by great fields where groups
- of men and women were working. They looked at me as I went by down the
- long, long road, alone and exposed and out of the world.
- I remember nobody came at the border village to examine my pack, I
- passed through unchallenged. All was quiet and lifeless and hopeless,
- with big stretches of heavy land.
- Till sunset came, very red and purple, and suddenly, from the heavy
- spacious open land I dropped sharply into the Rhine valley again,
- suddenly, as if into another glamorous world.
- There was the river rushing along between its high, mysterious, romantic
- banks, which were high as hills, and covered with vine. And there was
- the village of tall, quaint houses flickering its lights on to the
- deep-flowing river, and quite silent, save for the rushing of water.
- There was a fine covered bridge, very dark. I went to the middle and
- looked through the opening at the dark water below, at the façade of
- square lights, the tall village-front towering remote and silent above
- the river. The hill rose on either side the flood; down here was a
- small, forgotten, wonderful world that belonged to the date of isolated
- village communities and wandering minstrels.
- So I went back to the inn of The Golden Stag, and, climbing some steps,
- I made a loud noise. A woman came, and I asked for food. She led me
- through a room where were enormous barrels, ten feet in diameter, lying
- fatly on their sides; then through a large stone-clean kitchen, with
- bright pans, ancient as the Meistersinger; then up some steps and into
- the long guest-room, where a few tables were laid for supper.
- A few people were eating. I asked for Abendessen, and sat by the window
- looking at the darkness of the river below, the covered bridge, the dark
- hill opposite, crested with its few lights.
- Then I ate a very large quantity of knoedel soup and bread, and drank
- beer, and was very sleepy. Only one or two village men came in, and
- these soon went again; the place was dead still. Only at a long table on
- the opposite side of the room were seated seven or eight men, ragged,
- disreputable, some impudent--another came in late; the landlady gave
- them all thick soup with dumplings and bread and meat, serving them in a
- sort of brief disapprobation. They sat at the long table, eight or nine
- tramps and beggars and wanderers out of work and they ate with a sort of
- cheerful callousness and brutality for the most part, and as if
- ravenously, looking round and grinning sometimes, subdued, cowed, like
- prisoners, and yet impudent. At the end one shouted to know where he was
- to sleep. The landlady called to the young serving-woman, and in a
- classic German severity of disapprobation they were led up the stone
- stairs to their room. They tramped off in threes and twos, making a bad,
- mean, humiliated exit. It was not yet eight o'clock. The landlady sat
- talking to one bearded man, staid and severe, whilst, with her work on
- the table, she sewed steadily.
- As the beggars and wanderers went slinking out of the room, some called
- impudently, cheerfully:
- '_Nacht, Frau Wirtin--G'Nacht, Wirtin--'te Nacht, Frau_,' to all of
- which the hostess answered a stereotyped '_Gute Nacht_,' never turning
- her head from her sewing, or indicating by the faintest movement that
- she was addressing the men who were filing raggedly to the doorway.
- So the room was empty, save for the landlady and her sewing, the staid,
- elderly villager to whom she was talking in the unbeautiful dialect, and
- the young serving-woman who was clearing away the plates and basins of
- the tramps and beggars.
- Then the villager also went.
- '_Gute Nacht, Frau Seidl_,' to the landlady; '_Gute Nacht_,' at random,
- to me.
- So I looked at the newspaper. Then I asked the landlady for a cigarette,
- not knowing how else to begin. So she came to my table, and we talked.
- It pleased me to take upon myself a sort of romantic, wandering
- character; she said my German was '_schön_'; a little goes a long way.
- So I asked her who were the men who had sat at the long table. She
- became rather stiff and curt.
- 'They are the men looking for work,' she said, as if the subject were
- disagreeable.
- 'But why do they come here, so many?' I asked.
- Then she told me that they were going out of the country: this was
- almost the last village of the border: that the relieving officer in
- each village was empowered to give to every vagrant a ticket entitling
- the holder to an evening meal, bed, and bread in the morning, at a
- certain inn. This was the inn for the vagrants coming to this village.
- The landlady received fourpence per head, I believe it was, for each of
- these wanderers.
- 'Little enough,' I said.
- 'Nothing,' she replied.
- She did not like the subject at all. Only her respect for me made her
- answer.
- '_Bettler, Lumpen, und Taugenichtse!_' I said cheerfully.
- 'And men who are out of work, and are going back to their own parish,'
- she said stiffly.
- So we talked a little, and I too went to bed.
- '_Gute Nacht, Frau Wirtin._'
- '_Gute Nacht, mein Herr._'
- So I went up more and more stone stairs, attended by the young woman. It
- was a great, lofty, old deserted house, with many drab doors.
- At last, in the distant topmost floor, I had my bedroom, with two beds
- and bare floor and scant furniture. I looked down at the river far
- below, at the covered bridge, at the far lights on the hill above,
- opposite. Strange to be here in this lost, forgotten place, sleeping
- under the roof with tramps and beggars. I debated whether they would
- steal my boots if I put them out. But I risked it. The door-latch made a
- loud noise on the deserted landing, everywhere felt abandoned,
- forgotten. I wondered where the eight tramps and beggars were asleep.
- There was no way of securing the door. But somehow I felt that, if I
- were destined to be robbed or murdered, it would not be by tramps and
- beggars. So I blew out the candle and lay under the big feather bed,
- listening to the running and whispering of the medieval Rhine.
- And when I waked up again it was sunny, it was morning on the hill
- opposite, though the river deep below ran in shadow.
- The tramps and beggars were all gone: they must be cleared out by seven
- o'clock in the morning. So I had the inn to myself, I, and the landlady,
- and the serving-woman. Everywhere was very clean, full of the German
- morning energy and brightness, which is so different from the Latin
- morning. The Italians are dead and torpid first thing, the Germans are
- energetic and cheerful.
- It was cheerful in the sunny morning, looking down on the swift river,
- the covered, picturesque bridge, the bank and the hill opposite. Then
- down the curving road of the facing hill the Swiss cavalry came riding,
- men in blue uniforms. I went out to watch them. They came thundering
- romantically through the dark cavern of the roofed-in bridge, and they
- dismounted at the entrance to the village. There was a fresh
- morning-cheerful newness everywhere, in the arrival of the troops, in
- the welcome of the villagers.
- The Swiss do not look very military, neither in accoutrement nor
- bearing. This little squad of cavalry seemed more like a party of common
- men riding out in some business of their own than like an army. They
- were very republican and very free. The officer who commanded them was
- one of themselves, his authority was by consent.
- It was all very pleasant and genuine; there was a sense of ease and
- peacefulness, quite different from the mechanical, slightly sullen
- manoeuvring of the Germans.
- The village baker and his assistant came hot and floury from the
- bakehouse, bearing between them a great basket of fresh bread. The
- cavalry were all dismounted by the bridge-head, eating and drinking like
- business men. Villagers came to greet their friends: one soldier kissed
- his father, who came wearing a leathern apron. The school bell
- tang-tang-tanged from above, school children merged timidly through the
- grouped horses, up the narrow street, passing unwillingly with their
- books. The river ran swiftly, the soldiers, very haphazard and slack in
- uniform, real shack-bags, chewed their bread in large mouthfuls; the
- young lieutenant, who seemed to be an officer only by consent of the
- men, stood apart by the bridge-head, gravely. They were all serious and
- self-contented, very unglamorous. It was like a business excursion on
- horseback, harmless and uninspiring. The uniforms were almost ludicrous,
- so ill-fitting and casual.
- So I shouldered my own pack and set off, through the bridge over the
- Rhine, and up the hill opposite.
- There is something very dead about this country. I remember I picked
- apples from the grass by the roadside, and some were very sweet. But for
- the rest, there was mile after mile of dead, uninspired
- country--uninspired, so neutral and ordinary that it was almost
- destructive.
- One gets this feeling always in Switzerland, except high up: this
- feeling of average, of utter soulless ordinariness, something
- intolerable. Mile after mile, to Zurich, it was just the same. It was
- just the same in the tram-car going into Zurich; it was just the same in
- the town, in the shops, in the restaurant. All was the utmost level of
- ordinariness and well-being, but so ordinary that it was like a blight.
- All the picturesqueness of the town is nothing, it is like a most
- ordinary, average, usual person in an old costume. The place was
- soul-killing.
- So after two hours' rest, eating in a restaurant, wandering by the quay
- and through the market, and sitting on a seat by the lake, I found a
- steamer that would take me away. That is how I always feel in
- Switzerland: the only possible living sensation is the sensation of
- relief in going away, always going away. The horrible average
- ordinariness of it all, something utterly without flower or soul or
- transcendence, the horrible vigorous ordinariness, is too much.
- So I went on a steamer down the long lake, surrounded by low grey hills.
- It was Saturday afternoon. A thin rain came on. I thought I would rather
- be in fiery Hell than in this dead level of average life.
- I landed somewhere on the right bank, about three-quarters of the way
- down the lake. It was almost dark. Yet I must walk away. I climbed a
- long hill from the lake, came to the crest, looked down the darkness of
- the valley, and descended into the deep gloom, down into a
- soulless village.
- But it was eight o'clock, and I had had enough. One might as well sleep.
- I found the Gasthaus zur Post.
- It was a small, very rough inn, having only one common room, with bare
- tables, and a short, stout, grim, rather surly landlady, and a landlord
- whose hair stood up on end, and who was trembling on the edge of
- delirium tremens.
- They could only give me boiled ham: so I ate boiled ham and drank beer,
- and tried to digest the utter cold materialism of Switzerland.
- As I sat with my back to the wall, staring blankly at the trembling
- landlord, who was ready at any moment to foam at the mouth, and at the
- dour landlady, who was quite capable of keeping him in order, there came
- in one of those dark, showy Italian girls with a man. She wore a blouse
- and skirt, and no hat. Her hair was perfectly dressed. It was really
- Italy. The man was soft, dark, he would get stout later, _trapu_, he
- would have somewhat the figure of Caruso. But as yet he was soft,
- sensuous, young, handsome.
- They sat at the long side-table with their beer, and created another
- country at once within the room. Another Italian came, fair and fat and
- slow, one from the Venetian province; then another, a little thin young
- man, who might have been a Swiss save for his vivid movement.
- This last was the first to speak to the Germans. The others had just
- said '_Bier._' But the little newcomer entered into a conversation with
- the landlady.
- At last there were six Italians sitting talking loudly and warmly at the
- side-table. The slow, cold German-Swiss at the other tables looked at
- them occasionally. The landlord, with his crazed, stretched eyes, glared
- at them with hatred. But they fetched their beer from the bar with easy
- familiarity, and sat at their table, creating a bonfire of life in the
- callousness of the inn.
- At last they finished their beer and trooped off down the passage. The
- room was painfully empty. I did not know what to do.
- Then I heard the landlord yelling and screeching and snarling from the
- kitchen at the back, for all the world like a mad dog. But the Swiss
- Saturday evening customers at the other tables smoked on and talked in
- their ugly dialect, without trouble. Then the landlady came in, and soon
- after the landlord, he collarless, with his waistcoat unbuttoned,
- showing his loose throat, and accentuating his round pot-belly. His
- limbs were thin and feverish, the skin of his face hung loose, his eyes
- glaring, his hands trembled. Then he sat down to talk to a crony. His
- terrible appearance was a fiasco; nobody heeded him at all, only the
- landlady was surly.
- From the back came loud noises of pleasure and excitement and banging
- about. When the room door was opened I could see down the dark passage
- opposite another lighted door. Then the fat, fair Italian came in for
- more beer.
- 'What is all the noise?' I asked the landlady at last.
- 'It is the Italians,' she said.
- 'What are they doing?'
- 'They are doing a play.'
- 'Where?'
- She jerked her head: 'In the room at the back.'
- 'Can I go and look at them?'
- 'I should think so.'
- The landlord glaringly watched me go out. I went down the stone passage
- and found a great, half-lighted room that might be used to hold
- meetings, with forms piled at the side. At one end was raised platform
- or stage. And on this stage was a table and a lamp, and the Italians
- grouped round the light, gesticulating and laughing. Their beer mugs
- were on the table and on the floor of the stage; the little sharp youth
- was intently looking over some papers, the others were bending over the
- table with him.
- They looked up as I entered from the distance, looked at me in the
- distant twilight of the dusky room, as if I were an intruder, as if I
- should go away when I had seen them. But I said in German:
- 'May I look?'
- They were still unwilling to see or to hear me.
- 'What do you say?' the small one asked in reply.
- The others stood and watched, slightly at bay, like suspicious animals.
- 'If I might come and look,' I said in German; then, feeling very
- uncomfortable, in Italian: 'You are doing a drama, the landlady
- told me.'
- The big empty room was behind me, dark, the little company of Italians
- stood above me in the light of the lamp which was on the table. They all
- watched with unseeing, unwilling looks: I was merely an intrusion.
- 'We are only learning it,' said the small youth.
- They wanted me to go away. But I wanted to stay.
- 'May I listen?' I said. 'I don't want to stay in there.' And I
- indicated, with a movement of the head, the inn-room beyond.
- 'Yes,' said the young intelligent man. 'But we are only reading our
- parts.'
- They had all become more friendly to me, they accepted me.
- 'You are a German?' asked one youth.
- 'No--English.'
- 'English? But do you live in Switzerland?'
- 'No--I am walking to Italy.'
- 'On foot?'
- They looked with wakened eyes.
- 'Yes.'
- So I told them about my journey. They were puzzled. They did not quite
- understand why I wanted to walk. But they were delighted with the idea
- of going to Lugano and Como and then to Milan.
- 'Where do you come from?' I asked them.
- They were all from the villages between Verona and Venice. They had seen
- the Garda. I told them of my living there.
- 'Those peasants of the mountains,' they said at once, 'they are people
- of little education. Rather wild folk.'
- And they spoke with good-humoured contempt.
- I thought of Paolo, and Il Duro, and the Signor Pietro, our padrone, and
- I resented these factory-hands for criticizing them.
- So I sat on the edge of the stage whilst they rehearsed their parts. The
- little thin intelligent fellow, Giuseppino, was the leader. The others
- read their parts in the laborious, disjointed fashion of the peasant,
- who can only see one word at a time, and has then to put the words
- together, afterwards, to make sense. The play was an amateur melodrama,
- printed in little penny booklets, for carnival production. This was only
- the second reading they had given it, and the handsome, dark fellow, who
- was roused and displaying himself before the girl, a hard, erect piece
- of callousness, laughed and flushed and stumbled, and understood nothing
- till it was transferred into him direct through Giuseppino. The fat,
- fair, slow man was more conscientious. He laboured through his part. The
- other two men were in the background more or less.
- The most confidential was the fat, fair, slow man, who was called
- Alberto. His part was not very important, so he could sit by me and
- talk to me.
- He said they were all workers in the factory--silk, I think it was--in
- the village. They were a whole colony of Italians, thirty or more
- families. They had all come at different times.
- Giuseppino had been longest in the village. He had come when he was
- eleven, with his parents, and had attended the Swiss school. So he spoke
- perfect German. He was a clever man, was married, and had two children.
- He himself, Alberto, had been seven years in the valley; the girl, la
- Maddelena, had been here ten years; the dark man, Alfredo, who was
- flushed with excitement of her, had been in the village about nine
- years--he alone of all men was not married.
- The others had all married Italian wives, and they lived in the great
- dwelling whose windows shone yellow by the rattling factory. They lived
- entirely among themselves; none of them could speak German, more than a
- few words, except the Giuseppino, who was like a native here.
- It was very strange being among these Italians exiled in Switzerland.
- Alfredo, the dark one, the unmarried, was in the old tradition. Yet even
- he was curiously subject to a new purpose, as if there were some greater
- new will that included him, sensuous, mindless as he was. He seemed to
- give his consent to something beyond himself. In this he was different
- from Il Duro, in that he had put himself under the control of the
- outside conception.
- It was strange to watch them on the stage, the Italians all lambent,
- soft, warm, sensuous, yet moving subject round Giuseppino, who was
- always quiet, always ready, always impersonal. There was a look of
- purpose, almost of devotion on his face, that singled him out and made
- him seem the one stable, eternal being among them. They quarrelled, and
- he let them quarrel up to a certain point; then he called them back. He
- let them do as they liked so long as they adhered more or less to the
- central purpose, so long as they got on in some measure with the play.
- All the while they were drinking beer and smoking cigarettes. The
- Alberto was barman: he went out continually with the glasses. The
- Maddelena had a small glass. In the lamplight of the stage the little
- party read and smoked and practised, exposed to the empty darkness of
- the big room. Queer and isolated it seemed, a tiny, pathetic magicland
- far away from the barrenness of Switzerland. I could believe in the old
- fairy-tales where, when the rock was opened, a magic underworld
- was revealed.
- The Alfredo, flushed, roused, handsome, but very soft and enveloping in
- his heat, laughed and threw himself into his pose, laughed foolishly,
- and then gave himself up to his part. The Alberto, slow and laborious,
- yet with a spark of vividness and natural intensity flashing through,
- replied and gesticulated; the Maddelena laid her head on the bosom of
- Alfredo, the other men started into action, and the play proceeded
- intently for half an hour.
- Quick, vivid, and sharp, the little Giuseppino was always central. But
- he seemed almost invisible. When I think back, I can scarcely see him, I
- can only see the others, the lamplight on their faces and on their full
- gesticulating limbs. I can see--the Maddelena, rather coarse and hard
- and repellent, declaiming her words in a loud, half-cynical voice,
- falling on the breast of the Alfredo, who was soft and sensuous, more
- like a female, flushing, with his mouth getting wet, his eyes moist, as
- he was roused. I can see the Alberto, slow, laboured, yet with a kind of
- pristine simplicity in all his movements, that touched his fat
- commonplaceness with beauty. Then there were the two other men, shy,
- inflammable, unintelligent, with their sudden Italian rushes of hot
- feeling. All their faces are distinct in the lamplight, all their bodies
- ate palpable and dramatic.
- But the face of the Giuseppino is like a pale luminousness, a sort of
- gleam among all the ruddy glow, his body is evanescent, like a shadow.
- And his being seemed to cast its influence over all the others, except
- perhaps the woman, who was hard and resistant. The other men seemed all
- overcast, mitigated, in part transfigured by the will of the little
- leader. But they were very soft stuff, if inflammable.
- The young woman of the inn, niece of the landlady, came down and called
- out across the room.
- 'We will go away from here now,' said the Giuseppino to me. 'They close
- at eleven. But we have another inn in the next parish that is open all
- night. Come with us and drink some wine.'
- 'But,' I said, 'you would rather be alone.'
- No; they pressed me to go, they wanted me to go with them, they were
- eager, they wanted to entertain me. Alfredo, flushed, wet-mouthed, warm,
- protested I must drink wine, the real Italian red wine, from their own
- village at home. They would have no nay.
- So I told the landlady. She said I must be back by twelve o'clock.
- The night was very dark. Below the road the stream was rushing; there
- was a great factory on the other side of the water, making faint
- quivering lights of reflection, and one could see the working of
- machinery shadowy through the lighted windows. Near by was the tall
- tenement where the Italians lived.
- We went on through the straggling, raw village, deep beside the stream,
- then over the small bridge, and up the steep hill down which I had come
- earlier in the evening.
- So we arrived at the café. It was so different inside from the German
- inn, yet it was not like an Italian café either. It was brilliantly
- lighted, clean, new, and there were red-and-white cloths on the tables.
- The host was in the room, and his daughter, a beautiful red-haired girl.
- Greetings were exchanged with the quick, intimate directness of Italy.
- But there was another note also, a faint echo of reserve, as though they
- reserved themselves from the outer world, making a special inner
- community.
- Alfredo was hot: he took off his coat. We all sat freely at a long
- table, whilst the red-haired girl brought a quart of red wine. At other
- tables men were playing cards, with the odd Neapolitan cards. They too
- were talking Italian. It was a warm, ruddy bit of Italy within the cold
- darkness of Switzerland.
- 'When you come to Italy,' they said to me, 'salute it from us, salute
- the sun, and the earth, _l'Italia_.'
- So we drank in salute of Italy. They sent their greeting by me.
- 'You know in Italy there is the sun, the sun,' said Alfredo to me,
- profoundly moved, wet-mouthed, tipsy.
- I was reminded of Enrico Persevalli and his terrifying cry at the end of
- _Ghosts_:
- '_Il sole, il sole!_'
- So we talked for a while of Italy. They had a pained tenderness for it,
- sad, reserved.
- 'Don't you want to go back?' I said, pressing them to tell me
- definitely. 'Won't you go back some time?'
- 'Yes,' they said, 'we will go back.'
- But they spoke reservedly, without freedom. We talked about Italy, about
- songs, and Carnival; about the food, polenta, and salt. They laughed at
- my pretending to cut the slabs of polenta with a string: that rejoiced
- them all: it took them back to the Italian mezzo-giorno, the bells
- jangling in the campanile, the eating after the heavy work on the land.
- But they laughed with the slight pain and contempt and fondness which
- every man feels towards his past, when he has struggled away from that
- past, from the conditions which made it.
- They loved Italy passionately; but they would not go back. All their
- blood, all their senses were Italian, needed the Italian sky, the
- speech, the sensuous life. They could hardly live except through the
- senses. Their minds were not developed, mentally they were children,
- lovable, naïve, almost fragile children. But sensually they were men:
- sensually they were accomplished.
- Yet a new tiny flower was struggling to open in them, the flower of a
- new spirit. The substratum of Italy has always been pagan, sensuous, the
- most potent symbol the sexual symbol. The child is really a
- non-Christian symbol: it is the symbol of mans's triumph of eternal life
- in procreation. The worship of the Cross never really held good in
- Italy. The Christianity of Northern Europe has never had any
- place there.
- And now, when Northern Europe is turning back on its own Christianity,
- denying it all, the Italians are struggling with might and main against
- the sensuous spirit which still dominates them. When Northern Europe,
- whether it hates Nietzsche or not, is crying out for the Dionysic
- ecstasy, practising on itself the Dionysic ecstasy, Southern Europe is
- breaking free from Dionysus, from the triumphal affirmation of life over
- death, immortality through procreation.
- I could see these sons of Italy would never go back. Men like Paolo and
- Il Duro broke away only to return. The dominance of the old form was too
- strong for them. Call it love of country or love of the village,
- campanilismo, or what not, it was the dominance of the old pagan form,
- the old affirmation of immortality through procreation, as opposed to
- the Christian affirmation of immortality through self-death and
- social love.
- But 'John' and these Italians in Switzerland were a generation younger,
- and they would not go back, at least not to the old Italy. Suffer as
- they might, and they did suffer, wincing in every nerve and fibre from
- the cold material insentience of the northern countries and of America,
- still they would endure this for the sake of something else they wanted.
- They would suffer a death in the flesh, as 'John' had suffered in
- fighting the street crowd, as these men suffered year after year cramped
- in their black gloomy cold Swiss valley, working in the factory. But
- there would come a new spirit out of it.
- Even Alfredo was submitted to the new process; though he belonged
- entirely by nature to the sort of Il Duro, he was purely sensuous and
- mindless. But under the influence of Giuseppino he was thrown down, as
- fallow to the new spirit that would come.
- And then, when the others were all partially tipsy, the Giuseppino began
- to talk to me. In him was a steady flame burning, burning, burning, a
- flame of the mind, of the spirit, something new and clear, something
- that held even the soft, sensuous Alfredo in submission, besides all the
- others, who had some little development of mind.
- '_Sa signore_,' said the Giuseppino to me, quiet, almost invisible or
- inaudible, as it seemed, like a spirit addressing me, '_l'uomo non ha
- patria_--a man has no country. What has the Italian Government to do
- with us. What does a Government mean? It makes us work, it takes part of
- our wages away from us, it makes us soldiers--and what for? What is
- government for?'
- 'Have you been a soldier?' I interrupted him.
- He had not, none of them had: that was why they could not really go back
- to Italy. Now this was out; this explained partly their curious
- reservation in speaking about their beloved country. They had forfeited
- parents as well as homeland.
- 'What does the Government do? It takes taxes; it has an army and police,
- and it makes roads. But we could do without an army, and we could be our
- own police, and we could make our own roads. What is this Government?
- Who wants it? Only those who are unjust, and want to have advantage over
- somebody else. It is an instrument of injustice and of wrong.
- 'Why should we have a Government? Here, in this village, there are
- thirty families of Italians. There is no government for them, no Italian
- Government. And we live together better than in Italy. We are richer and
- freer, we have no policemen, no poor laws. We help each other, and there
- are no poor.
- 'Why are these Governments always doing what we don't want them to do?
- We should not be fighting in the Cirenaica if we were all Italians. It
- is the Government that does it. They talk and talk and do things with
- us: but we don't want them.'
- The others, tipsy, sat round the table with the terrified gravity of
- children who are somehow responsible for things they do not understand.
- They stirred in their seats, turning aside, with gestures almost of
- pain, of imprisonment. Only Alfredo, laying his hand on mine, was
- laughing, loosely, floridly. He would upset all the Government with a
- jerk of his well-built shoulder, and then he would have a spree--such a
- spree. He laughed wetly to me.
- The Giuseppino waited patiently during this tipsy confidence, but his
- pale clarity and beauty was something constant star-like in comparison
- with the flushed, soft handsomeness of the other. He waited patiently,
- looking at me.
- But I did not want him to go on: I did not want to answer. I could feel
- a new spirit in him, something strange and pure and slightly
- frightening. He wanted something which was beyond me. And my soul was
- somewhere in tears, crying helplessly like an infant in the night. I
- could not respond: I could not answer. He seemed to look at me, me, an
- Englishman, an educated man, for corroboration. But I could not
- corroborate him. I knew the purity and new struggling towards birth of a
- true star-like spirit. But I could not confirm him in his utterance: my
- soul could not respond. I did not believe in the perfectibility of man.
- I did not believe in infinite harmony among men. And this was his star,
- this belief.
- It was nearly midnight. A Swiss came in and asked for beer. The Italians
- gathered round them a curious darkness of reserve. And then I must go.
- They shook hands with me warmly, truthfully, putting a sort of implicit
- belief in me, as representative of some further knowledge. But there was
- a fixed, calm resolve over the face of the Giuseppino, a sort of steady
- faith, even in disappointment. He gave me a copy of a little Anarchist
- paper published in Geneva. _L'Anarchista_, I believe it was called. I
- glanced at it. It was in Italian, naïve, simple, rather rhetorical. So
- they were all Anarchists, these Italians.
- I ran down the hill in the thick Swiss darkness to the little bridge,
- and along the uneven cobbled street. I did not want to think, I did not
- want to know. I wanted to arrest my activity, to keep it confined to the
- moment, to the adventure.
- When I came to the flight of stone steps which led up to the door of the
- inn, at the side I saw in the darkness two figures. They said a low good
- night and parted; the girl began to knock at the door, the man
- disappeared. It was the niece of the landlady parting from her lover.
- We waited outside the locked door, at the top of the stone steps, in the
- darkness of midnight. The stream rustled below. Then came a shouting and
- an insane snarling within the passage; the bolts were not withdrawn.
- 'It is the gentleman, it is the strange gentleman,' called the girl.
- Then came again the furious shouting snarls, and the landlord's mad
- voice:
- 'Stop out, stop out there. The door won't be opened again.'
- 'The strange gentleman is here,' repeated the girl.
- Then more movement was heard, and the door was suddenly opened, and the
- landlord rushed out upon us, wielding a broom. It was a strange sight,
- in the half-lighted passage. I stared blankly in the doorway. The
- landlord dropped the broom he was waving and collapsed as if by magic,
- looking at me, though he continued to mutter madly, unintelligibly. The
- girl slipped past me, and the landlord snarled. Then he picked up the
- brush, at the same time crying:
- 'You are late, the door was shut, it will not be opened. We shall have
- the police in the house. We said twelve o'clock; at twelve o'clock the
- door must be shut, and must not be opened again. If you are late you
- stay out--'
- So he went snarling, his voice rising higher and higher, away into the
- kitchen.
- 'You are coming to your room?' the landlady said to me coldly. And she
- led me upstairs.
- The room was over the road, clean, but rather ugly, with a large tin,
- that had once contained lard or Swiss-milk, to wash in. But the bed was
- good enough, which was all that mattered.
- I heard the landlord yelling, and there was a long and systematic
- thumping somewhere, thump, thump, thump, and banging. I wondered where
- it was. I could not locate it at all, because my room lay beyond another
- large room: I had to go through a large room, by the foot of two beds,
- to get to my door; so I could not quite tell where anything was.
- But I went to sleep whilst I was wondering.
- I woke in the morning and washed in the tin. I could see a few people in
- the street, walking in the Sunday morning leisure. It felt like Sunday
- in England, and I shrank from it. I could see none of the Italians. The
- factory stood there, raw and large and sombre, by the stream, and the
- drab-coloured stone tenements were close by. Otherwise the village was a
- straggling Swiss street, almost untouched.
- The landlord was quiet and reasonable, even friendly, in the morning. He
- wanted to talk to me: where had I bought my boots, was his first
- question. I told him in Munich. And how much had they cost? I told him
- twenty-eight marks. He was much impressed by them: such good boots, of
- such soft, strong, beautiful leather; he had not seen such boots for a
- long time.
- Then I knew it was he who had cleaned my boots. I could see him
- fingering them and wondering over them. I rather liked him. I could see
- he had had imagination once, and a certain fineness of nature. Now he
- was corrupted with drink, too far gone to be even a human being. I hated
- the village.
- They set bread and butter and a piece of cheese weighing about five
- pounds, and large, fresh, sweet cakes for breakfast. I ate and was
- thankful: the food was good.
- A couple of village youths came in, in their Sunday clothes. They had
- the Sunday stiffness. It reminded me of the stiffness and curious
- self-consciousness that comes over life in England on a Sunday. But the
- Landlord sat with his waistcoat hanging open over his shirt,
- pot-bellied, his ruined face leaning forward, talking, always talking,
- wanting to know.
- So in a few minutes I was out on the road again, thanking God for the
- blessing of a road that belongs to no man, and travels away from
- all men.
- I did not want to see the Italians. Something had got tied up in me, and
- I could not bear to see them again. I liked them so much; but, for some
- reason or other, my mind stopped like clockwork if I wanted to think of
- them and of what their lives would be, their future. It was as if some
- curious negative magnetism arrested my mind, prevented it from working,
- the moment I turned it towards these Italians.
- I do not know why it was. But I could never write to them, or think of
- them, or even read the paper they gave me though it lay in my drawer for
- months, in Italy, and I often glanced over six lines of it. And often,
- often my mind went back to the group, the play they were rehearsing, the
- wine in the pleasant café, and the night. But the moment my memory
- touched them, my whole soul stopped and was null; I could not go on.
- Even now I cannot really consider them in thought.
- I shrink involuntarily away. I do not know why this is.
- _The Return Journey_
- When one walks, one must travel west or south. If one turns northward or
- eastward it is like walking down a cul-de-sac, to the blind end.
- So it has been since the Crusaders came home satiated, and the
- Renaissance saw the western sky as an archway into the future. So it is
- still. We must go westwards and southwards.
- It is a sad and gloomy thing to travel even from Italy into France. But
- it is a joyful thing to walk south to Italy, south and west. It is so.
- And there is a certain exaltation in the thought of going west, even to
- Cornwall, to Ireland. It is as if the magnetic poles were south-west and
- north-east, for our spirits, with the south-west, under the sunset, as
- the positive pole. So whilst I walk through Switzerland, though it is a
- valley of gloom and depression, a light seems to flash out under every
- footstep, with the joy of progression.
- It was Sunday morning when I left the valley where the Italians lived. I
- went quickly over the stream, heading for Lucerne. It was a good thing
- to be out of doors, with one's pack on one's back, climbing uphill. But
- the trees were thick by the roadside; I was not yet free. It was Sunday
- morning, very still.
- In two hours I was at the top of the hill, looking out over the
- intervening valley at the long lake of Zurich, spread there beyond with
- its girdle of low hills, like a relief-map. I could not bear to look at
- it, it was so small and unreal. I had a feeling as if it were false, a
- large relief-map that I was looking down upon, and which I wanted to
- smash. It seemed to intervene between me and some reality. I could not
- believe that that was the real world. It was a figment, a fabrication,
- like a dull landscape painted on a wall, to hide the real landscape.
- So I went on, over to the other side of the hill, and I looked out
- again. Again there were the smoky-looking hills and the lake like a
- piece of looking-glass. But the hills were higher: that big one was the
- Rigi. I set off down the hill.
- There was fat agricultural land and several villages. And church was
- over. The churchgoers were all coming home: men in black broadcloth and
- old chimney-pot silk hats, carrying their umbrellas; women in ugly
- dresses, carrying books and umbrellas. The streets were dotted with
- these black-clothed men and stiff women, all reduced to a Sunday
- nullity. I hated it. It reminded me of that which I knew in my boyhood,
- that stiff, null 'propriety' which used to come over us, like a sort of
- deliberate and self-inflicted cramp, on Sundays. I hated these elders in
- black broadcloth, with their neutral faces, going home piously to their
- Sunday dinners. I hated the feeling of these villages, comfortable,
- well-to-do, clean, and proper.
- And my boot was chafing two of my toes. That always happens. I had come
- down to a wide, shallow valley-bed, marshy. So about a mile out of the
- village I sat down by a stone bridge, by a stream, and tore up my
- handkerchief, and bound up the toes. And as I sat binding my toes, two
- of the elders in black, with umbrellas under their arms, approached from
- the direction of the village.
- They made me so furious, I had to hasten to fasten my boot, to hurry on
- again, before they should come near me. I could not bear the way they
- walked and talked, so crambling and material and mealy-mouthed.
- Then it did actually begin to rain. I was just going down a short hill.
- So I sat under a bush and watched the trees drip. I was so glad to be
- there, homeless, without place or belonging, crouching under the leaves
- in the copse by the road, that I felt I had, like the meek, inherited
- the earth. Some men went by, with their coat-collars turned up, and the
- rain making still blacker their black broadcloth shoulders. They did not
- see me. I was as safe and separate as a ghost. So I ate the remains of
- my food that I had bought in Zurich, and waited for the rain.
- Later, in the wet Sunday afternoon, I went on to the little lake, past
- many inert, neutral, material people, down an ugly road where trams ran.
- The blight of Sunday was almost intolerable near the town.
- So on I went, by the side of the steamy, reedy lake, walking the length
- of it. Then suddenly I went in to a little villa by the water for tea.
- In Switzerland every house is a villa.
- But this villa, was kept by two old ladies and a delicate dog, who must
- not get his feet wet. I was very happy there. I had good jam and strange
- honey-cakes for tea, that I liked, and the little old ladies pattered
- round in a great stir, always whirling like two dry leaves after the
- restless dog.
- 'Why must he not go out?' I said.
- 'Because it is wet,' they answered, 'and he coughs and sneezes.'
- 'Without a handkerchief, that is not _angenehm_' I said.
- So we became bosom friends.
- 'You are Austrian?' they said to me.
- I said I was from Graz; that my father was a doctor in Graz, and that I
- was walking for my pleasure through the countries of Europe.
- I said this because I knew a doctor from Graz who was always wandering
- about, and because I did not want to be myself, an Englishman, to these
- two old ladies. I wanted to be something else. So we exchanged
- confidences.
- They told me, in their queer, old, toothless fashion, about their
- visitors, a man who used to fish all day, every day for three weeks,
- fish every hour of the day, though many a day he caught nothing--nothing
- at all--still he fished from the boat; and so on, such trivialities.
- Then they told me of a third sister who had died, a third little old
- lady. One could feel the gap in the house. They cried; and I, being an
- Austrian from Graz, to my astonishment felt my tears slip over on to the
- table. I also _was_ sorry, and I would have kissed the little old ladies
- to comfort them.
- 'Only in heaven it is warm, and it doesn't rain, and no one dies,' I
- said, looking at the wet leaves.
- Then I went away. I would have stayed the night at this house: I wanted
- to. But I had developed my Austrian character too far.
- So I went on to a detestable brutal inn in the town. And the next day I
- climbed over the back of the detestable Rigi, with its vile hotel, to
- come to Lucerne. There, on the Rigi, I met a lost young Frenchman who
- could speak no German, and who said he could not find people to speak
- French. So we sat on a stone and became close friends, and I promised
- faithfully to go and visit him in his barracks in Algiers: I was to sail
- from Naples to Algiers. He wrote me the address on his card, and told me
- he had friends in the regiment, to whom I should be introduced, and we
- could have a good time, if I would stay a week or two, down there
- in Algiers.
- How much more real Algiers was than the rock on the Rigi where we sat,
- or the lake beneath, or the mountains beyond. Algiers is very real,
- though I have never seen it, and my friend is my friend for ever, though
- I have lost his card and forgotten his name. He was a Government clerk
- from Lyons, making this his first foreign tour before he began his
- military service. He showed me his 'circular excursion ticket'. Then at
- last we parted, for he must get to the top of the Rigi, and I must get
- to the bottom.
- Lucerne and its lake were as irritating as ever--like the wrapper round
- milk chocolate. I could not sleep even one night there: I took the
- steamer down the lake, to the very last station. There I found a good
- German inn, and was happy.
- There was a tall thin young man, whose face was red and inflamed from
- the sun. I thought he was a German tourist. He had just come in; and he
- was eating bread and milk. He and I were alone in the eating-room. He
- was looking at an illustrated paper.
- 'Does the steamer stop here all night?' I asked him in German, hearing
- the boat bustling and blowing her steam on the water outside, and
- glancing round at her lights, red and white, in the pitch darkness.
- He only shook his head over his bread and milk, and did not lift his
- face.
- 'Are you English, then?' I said.
- No one but an Englishman would have hidden his face in a bowl of milk,
- and have shaken his red ears in such painful confusion.
- 'Yes,' he said, 'I am.'
- And I started almost out of my skin at the unexpected London accent. It
- was as if one suddenly found oneself in the Tube.
- 'So am I,' I said. 'Where have you come from?'
- Then he began, like a general explaining his plans, to tell me. He had
- walked round over the Furka Pass, had been on foot four or five days. He
- had walked tremendously. Knowing no German, and nothing of the
- mountains, he had set off alone on this tour: he had a fortnight's
- holiday. So he had come over the Rhône Glacier across the Furka and down
- from Andermatt to the Lake. On this last day he had walked about thirty
- mountain miles.
- 'But weren't you tired?' I said, aghast.
- He was. Under the inflamed redness of his sun- and wind- and snow-burned
- face he was sick with fatigue. He had done over a hundred miles in the
- last four days.
- 'Did you enjoy it?' I asked.
- 'Oh yes. I wanted to do it all.' He wanted to do it, and he _had_ done
- it. But God knows what he wanted to do it for. He had now one day at
- Lucerne, one day at Interlaken and Berne, then London.
- I was sorry for him in my soul, he was so cruelly tired, so perishingly
- victorious.
- 'Why did you do so much?' I said. 'Why did you come on foot all down the
- valley when you could have taken the train? Was it worth it?'
- 'I think so,' he said.
- Yet he was sick with fatigue and over-exhaustion. His eyes were quite
- dark, sightless: he seemed to have lost the power of seeing, to be
- virtually blind. He hung his head forward when he had to write a post
- card, as if he felt his way. But he turned his post card so that I
- should not see to whom it was addressed; not that I was interested; only
- I noticed his little, cautious, English movement of privacy.
- 'What time will you be going on?' I asked.
- 'When is the first steamer?' he said, and he turned out a guide-book
- with a time-table. He would leave at about seven.
- 'But why so early?' I said to him.
- He must be in Lucerne at a certain hour, and at Interlaken in the
- evening.
- 'I suppose you will rest when you get to London?' I said.
- He looked at me quickly, reservedly.
- I was drinking beer: I asked him wouldn't he have something. He thought
- a moment, then said he would have another glass of hot milk. The
- landlord came--'And bread?' he asked.
- The Englishman refused. He could not eat, really. Also he was poor; he
- had to husband his money. The landlord brought the milk and asked me,
- when would the gentleman want to go away. So I made arrangements between
- the landlord and the stranger. But the Englishman was slightly
- uncomfortable at my intervention. He did not like me to know what he
- would have for breakfast.
- I could feel so well the machine that had him in its grip. He slaved for
- a year, mechanically, in London, riding in the Tube, working in the
- office. Then for a fortnight he was let free. So he rushed to
- Switzerland, with a tour planned out, and with just enough money to see
- him through, and to buy presents at Interlaken: bits of the edelweiss
- pottery: I could see him going home with them.
- So he arrived, and with amazing, pathetic courage set forth on foot in a
- strange land, to face strange landlords, with no language but English at
- his command, and his purse definitely limited. Yet he wanted to go among
- the mountains, to cross a glacier. So he had walked on and on, like one
- possessed, ever forward. His name might have been Excelsior, indeed.
- But then, when he reached his Furka, only to walk along the ridge and to
- descend on the same side! My God, it was killing to the soul. And here
- he was, down again from the mountains, beginning his journey home again:
- steamer and train and steamer and train and Tube, till he was back in
- the machine.
- It hadn't let him go, and he knew it. Hence his cruel self-torture of
- fatigue, his cruel exercise of courage. He who hung his head in his milk
- in torment when I asked him a question in German, what courage had he
- not needed to take this his very first trip out of England, alone,
- on foot!
- His eyes were dark and deep with unfathomable courage. Yet he was going
- back in the morning. He was going back. All he had courage for was to go
- back. He would go back, though he died by inches. Why not? It was
- killing him, it was like living loaded with irons. But he had the
- courage to submit, to die that way, since it was the way allotted
- to him.
- The way he sank on the table in exhaustion, drinking his milk, his will,
- nevertheless, so perfect and unblemished, triumphant, though his body
- was broken and in anguish, was almost too much to bear. My heart was
- wrung for my countryman, wrung till it bled.
- I could not bear to understand my countryman, a man who worked for his
- living, as I had worked, as nearly all my countrymen work. He would not
- give in. On his holiday he would walk, to fulfil his purpose, walk on;
- no matter how cruel the effort were, he would not rest, he would not
- relinquish his purpose nor abate his will, not by one jot or tittle. His
- body must pay whatever his will demanded, though it were torture.
- It all seemed to me so foolish. I was almost in tears. He went to bed. I
- walked by the dark lake, and talked to the girl in the inn. She was a
- pleasant girl: it was a pleasant inn, a homely place. One could be
- happy there.
- In the morning it was sunny, the lake was blue. By night I should be
- nearly at the crest of my journey. I was glad.
- The Englishman had gone. I looked for his name in the book. It was
- written in a fair, clerkly hand. He lived at Streatham. Suddenly I hated
- him. The dogged fool, to keep his nose on the grindstone like that. What
- was all his courage but the very tip-top of cowardice? What a vile
- nature--almost Sadish, proud, like the infamous Red Indians, of being
- able to stand torture.
- The landlord came to talk to me. He was fat and comfortable and too
- respectful. But I had to tell him all the Englishman had done, in the
- way of a holiday, just to shame his own fat, ponderous, inn-keeper's
- luxuriousness that was too gross. Then all I got out of his enormous
- comfortableness was:
- 'Yes, that's a _very_ long step to take.'
- So I set off myself, up the valley between the close, snow-topped
- mountains, whose white gleamed above me as I crawled, small as an
- insect, along the dark, cold valley below.
- There had been a cattle fair earlier in the morning, so troops of cattle
- were roving down the road, some with bells tang-tanging, all with soft
- faces and startled eyes and a sudden swerving of horns. The grass was
- very green by the roads and by the streams; the shadows of the mountain
- slopes were very dark on either hand overhead, and the sky with snowy
- flanks and tips was high up.
- Here, away from the world, the villages were quiet and obscure--left
- behind. They had the same fascinating atmosphere of being forgotten,
- left out of the world, that old English villages have. And buying apples
- and cheese and bread in a little shop that sold everything and smelled
- of everything, I felt at home again.
- But climbing gradually higher, mile after mile, always between the
- shadows of the high mountains, I was glad I did not live in the Alps.
- The villages on the slopes, the people there, seemed, as if they _must_
- gradually, bit by bit, slide down and tumble to the water-course, and be
- rolled on away, away to the sea. Straggling, haphazard little villages
- ledged on the slope, high up, beside their wet, green, hanging meadows,
- with pine trees behind and the valley bottom far below, and rocks right
- above, on both sides, seemed like little temporary squattings of outcast
- people. It seemed impossible that they should persist there, with great
- shadows wielded over them, like a menace, and gleams of brief sunshine,
- like a window. There was a sense of momentariness and expectation. It
- seemed as though some dramatic upheaval must take place, the mountains
- fall down into their own shadows. The valley beds were like deep graves,
- the sides of the mountains like the collapsing walls of a grave. The
- very mountain-tops above, bright with transcendent snow, seemed like
- death, eternal death.
- There, it seemed, in the glamorous snow, was the source of death, which
- fell down in great waves of shadow and rock, rushing to the level earth.
- And all the people of the mountains, on the slopes, in the valleys,
- seemed to live upon this great, rushing wave of death, of breaking-down,
- of destruction.
- The very pure source of breaking-down, decomposition, the very quick of
- cold death, is the snowy mountain-peak above. There, eternally, goes on
- the white foregathering of the crystals, out of the deathly cold of the
- heavens; this is the static nucleus where death meets life in its
- elementality. And thence, from their white, radiant nucleus of death in
- life, flows the great flux downwards, towards life and warmth. And we
- below, we cannot think of the flux upwards, that flows from the
- needle-point of snow to the unutterable cold and death.
- The people under the mountains, they seem to live in the flux of death,
- the last, strange, overshadowed units of life. Big shadows wave over
- them, there is the eternal noise of water falling icily downwards from
- the source of death overhead.
- And the people under the shadows, dwelling in the tang of snow and the
- noise of icy water, seem dark, almost sordid, brutal. There is no
- flowering or coming to flower, only this persistence, in the ice-touched
- air, of reproductive life.
- But it is difficult to get a sense of a native population. Everywhere
- are the hotels and the foreigners, the parasitism. Yet there is, unseen,
- this overshadowed, overhung, sordid mountain population, ledged on the
- slopes and in the crevices. In the wider valleys there is still a sense
- of cowering among the people. But they catch a new tone from their
- contact with the foreigners. And in the towns are nothing but
- tradespeople.
- So I climbed slowly up, for a whole day, first along the highroad,
- sometimes above and sometimes below the twisting, serpentine railway,
- then afterwards along a path on the side of the hill--a path that went
- through the crew-yards of isolated farms and even through the garden of
- a village priest. The priest was decorating an archway. He stood on a
- chair in the sunshine, reaching up with a garland, whilst the
- serving-woman stood below, talking loudly.
- The valley here seemed wider, the great flanks of the mountains gave
- place, the peaks above were further back. So one was happier. I was
- pleased as I sat by the thin track of single flat stones that dropped
- swiftly downhill.
- At the bottom was a little town with a factory or quarry, or a foundry,
- some place with long, smoking chimneys; which made me feel quite at home
- among the mountains.
- It is the hideous rawness of the world of men, the horrible, desolating
- harshness of the advance of the industrial world upon the world of
- nature, that is so painful. It looks as though the industrial spread of
- mankind were a sort of dry disintegration advancing and advancing, a
- process of dry disintegration. If only we could learn to take thought
- for the whole world instead of for merely tiny bits of it.
- I went through the little, hideous, crude factory-settlement in the high
- valley, where the eternal snows gleamed, past the enormous
- advertisements for chocolate and hotels, up the last steep slope of the
- pass to where the tunnel begins. Göschenen, the village at the mouth of
- the tunnel, is all railway sidings and haphazard villas for tourists,
- post cards, and touts and weedy carriages; disorder and sterile chaos,
- high up. How should any one stay there!
- I went on up the pass itself. There were various parties of visitors on
- the roads and tracks, people from towns incongruously walking and
- driving. It was drawing on to evening. I climbed slowly, between the
- great cleft in the rock where are the big iron gates, through which the
- road winds, winds half-way down the narrow gulley of solid, living rock,
- the very throat of the path, where hangs a tablet in memory of many
- Russians killed.
- Emerging through the dark rocky throat of the pass I came to the upper
- world, the level upper world. It was evening, livid, cold. On either
- side spread the sort of moorland of the wide pass-head. I drew near
- along the high-road, to Andermatt.
- Everywhere were soldiers moving about the livid, desolate waste of this
- upper world. I passed the barracks and the first villas for visitors.
- Darkness was coming on; the straggling, inconclusive street of Andermatt
- looked as if it were some accident--houses, hotels, barracks,
- lodging-places tumbled at random as the caravan of civilization crossed
- this high, cold, arid bridge of the European world.
- I bought two post cards and wrote them out of doors in the cold, livid
- twilight. Then I asked a soldier where was the post-office. He directed
- me. It was something like sending post cards from Skegness or Bognor,
- there in the post-office.
- I was trying to make myself agree to stay in Andermatt for the night.
- But I could not. The whole place was so terribly raw and flat and
- accidental, as if great pieces of furniture had tumbled out of a
- pantechnicon and lay discarded by the road. I hovered in the street, in
- the twilight, trying to make myself stay. I looked at the announcements
- of lodgings and boarding for visitors. It was no good. I could not go
- into one of these houses.
- So I passed on, through the old, low, broad-eaved houses that cringe
- down to the very street, out into the open again. The air was fierce and
- savage. On one side was a moorland, level; on the other a sweep of naked
- hill, curved concave, and sprinkled with snow. I could see how wonderful
- it would all be, under five or six feet of winter snow, skiing and
- tobogganing at Christmas. But it needed the snow. In the summer there is
- to be seen nothing but the winter's broken detritus.
- The twilight deepened, though there was still the strange, glassy
- translucency of the snow-lit air. A fragment of moon was in the sky. A
- carriage-load of French tourists passed me. There was the loud noise of
- water, as ever, something eternal and maddening in its sound, like the
- sound of Time itself, rustling and rushing and wavering, but never for a
- second ceasing. The rushing of Time that continues throughout eternity,
- this is the sound of the icy streams of Switzerland, something that
- mocks and destroys our warm being.
- So I came, in the early darkness, to the little village with the broken
- castle that stands for ever frozen at the point where the track parts,
- one way continuing along the ridge, to the Furka Pass, the other
- swerving over the hill to the left, over the Gotthardt.
- In this village I must stay. I saw a woman looking hastily, furtively
- from a doorway. I knew she was looking for visitors. I went on up the
- hilly street. There were only a few wooden houses and a gaily lighted
- wooden inn, where men were laughing, and strangers, men, standing
- talking loudly in the doorway.
- It was very difficult to go to a house this night. I did not want to
- approach any of them. I turned back to the house of the peering woman.
- She had looked hen-like and anxious. She would be glad of a visitor to
- help her pay her rent.
- It was a clean, pleasant wooden house, made to keep out the cold. That
- seemed its one function: to defend the inmates from the cold. It was
- furnished like a hut, just tables and chairs and bare wooden walls. One
- felt very close and secure in the room, as in a hut, shut away from the
- outer world.
- The hen-like woman came.
- 'Can I have a bed,' I said, 'for the night?'
- '_Abendessen, ja!_' she replied. 'Will you have soup and boiled beef and
- vegetables?'
- I said I would, so I sat down to wait, in the utter silence. I could
- scarcely hear the ice-stream, the silence seemed frozen, the house
- empty. The woman seemed to be flitting aimlessly, scurriedly, in reflex
- against the silence. One could almost touch the stillness as one could
- touch the walls, or the stove, or the table with white American
- oil-cloth.
- Suddenly she appeared again.
- 'What will you drink?'
- She watched my face anxiously, and her voice was pathetic, slightly
- pleading in its quickness.
- 'Wine or beer?' she said.
- I would not trust the coldness of beer.
- 'A half of red wine,' I said.
- I knew she was going to keep me an indefinite time.
- She appeared with the wine and bread.
- 'Would you like omelette after the beef?' she asked. 'Omelette with
- cognac--I can make it _very_ good.'
- I knew I should be spending too much, but I said yes. After all, why
- should I not eat, after the long walk?
- So she left me again, whilst I sat in the utter isolation and stillness,
- eating bread and drinking the wine, which was good. And I listened for
- any sound: only the faint noise of the stream. And I wondered, Why am I
- here, on this ridge of the Alps, in the lamp-lit, wooden, close-shut
- room, alone? Why am I here?
- Yet somehow I was glad, I was happy even: such splendid silence and
- coldness and clean isolation. It was something eternal, unbroachable: I
- was free, in this heavy, ice-cold air, this upper world, alone. London,
- far away below, beyond, England, Germany, France--they were all so
- unreal in the night. It was a sort of grief that this continent all
- beneath was so unreal, false, non-existent in its activity. Out of the
- silence one looked down on it, and it seemed to have lost all
- importance, all significance. It was so big, yet it had no significance.
- The kingdom of the world had no significance: what could one do but
- wander about?
- The woman came with my soup. I asked her, did not many people come in
- the summer. But she was scared away, she did not answer, she went like a
- leaf in the wind. However, the soup was good and plentiful.
- She was a long time before she came with the next course. Then she put
- the tray on the table, and looking at me, then looking away,
- shrinking, she said:
- 'You must excuse me if I don't answer you--I don't hear well--I am
- rather deaf.'
- I looked at her, and I winced also. She shrank in such simple pain from
- the fact of her defect. I wondered if she were bullied because of it, or
- only afraid lest visitors would dislike it.
- She put the dishes in order, set me my plate, quickly, nervously, and
- was gone again, like a scared chicken. Being tired, I wanted to weep
- over her, the nervous, timid hen, so frightened by her own deafness. The
- house was silent of her, empty. It was perhaps her deafness which
- created this empty soundlessness.
- When she came with the omelette, I said to her loudly:
- 'That was very good, the soup and meat.' So she quivered nervously, and
- said, 'Thank you,' and I managed to talk to her. She was like most deaf
- people, in that her terror of not hearing made her six times worse than
- she actually was.
- She spoke with a soft, strange accent, so I thought she was perhaps a
- foreigner. But when I asked her she misunderstood, and I had not the
- heart to correct her. I can only remember she said her house was always
- full in the winter, about Christmas-time. People came for the winter
- sport. There were two young English ladies who always came to her.
- She spoke of them warmly. Then, suddenly afraid, she drifted off again.
- I ate the omelette with cognac, which was very good, then I looked in
- the street. It was very dark, with bright stars, and smelled of snow.
- Two village men went by. I was tired, I did not want to go to the inn.
- So I went to bed, in the silent, wooden house. I had a small bedroom,
- clean and wooden and very cold. Outside, the stream was rushing. I
- covered myself with a great depth of featherbed, and looked at the
- stars, and the shadowy upper world, and went to sleep.
- In the morning I washed in the ice-cold water, and was glad to set out.
- An icy mist was over the noisy stream, there were a few meagre, shredded
- pine-trees. I had breakfast and paid my bill: it was seven francs--more
- than I could afford; but that did not matter, once I was out in the air.
- The sky was blue and perfect, it was a ringing morning, the village was
- very still. I went up the hill till I came to the signpost. I looked
- down the direction of the Furka, and thought of my tired Englishman from
- Streatham, who would be on his way home. Thank God I need not go home:
- never, perhaps. I turned up the track to the left, to the Gothard.
- Standing looking round at the mountain-tops, at the village and the
- broken castle below me, at the scattered debris of Andermatt on the moor
- in the distance, I was jumping in my soul with delight. Should one ever
- go down to the lower world?
- Then I saw another figure striding along, a youth with knee-breeches and
- Alpine hat and braces over his shirt, walking manfully, his coat slung
- in his rucksack behind. I laughed, and waited. He came my way.
- 'Are you going over the Gothard?' I said.
- 'Yes,' he replied. 'Are you also?'
- 'Yes' I said. 'We will go together.'
- So we set off, climbing a track up the heathy rocks.
- He was a pale, freckled town youth from Basel, seventeen years old. He
- was a clerk in a baggage-transport firm--Gondrand Frères, I believe. He
- had a week's holiday, in which time he was going to make a big circular
- walk, something like the Englishman's. But he was accustomed to this
- mountain walking: he belonged to a Sportverein. Manfully he marched in
- his thick hob-nailed boots, earnestly he scrambled up the rocks.
- We were in the crest of the pass. Broad snow-patched slopes came down
- from the pure sky; the defile was full of stones, all bare stones,
- enormous ones as big as a house, and small ones, pebbles. Through these
- the road wound in silence, through this upper, transcendent desolation,
- wherein was only the sound of the stream. Sky and snow-patched slopes,
- then the stony, rocky bed of the defile, full of morning sunshine: this
- was all. We were crossing in silence from the northern world to
- the southern.
- But he, Emil, was going to take the train back, through the tunnel, in
- the evening, to resume his circular walk at Göschenen.
- I, however, was going on, over the ridge of the world, from the north
- into the south. So I was glad.
- We climbed up the gradual incline for a long time. The slopes above
- became lower, they began to recede. The sky was very near, we were
- walking under the sky.
- Then the defile widened out, there was an open place before us, the very
- top of the pass. Also there were low barracks, and soldiers. We heard
- firing. Standing still, we saw on the slopes of snow, under the radiant
- blue heaven, tiny puffs of smoke, then some small black figures crossing
- the snow patch, then another rattle of rifle-fire, rattling dry and
- unnatural in the upper, skyey air, between the rocks.
- '_Das ist schön_,' said my companion, in his simple admiration.
- '_Hübsch_,' I said.
- 'But that would be splendid, to be firing up there, manoeuvring up in
- the snow.'
- And he began to tell me how hard a soldier's life was, how hard the
- soldier was drilled.
- 'You don't look forward to it?' I said.
- 'Oh yes, I do. I want to be a soldier, I want to serve my time.'
- 'Why?'I said.
- 'For the exercise, the life, the drilling. One becomes strong.'
- 'Do all the Swiss want to serve their time in the army?' I asked.
- 'Yes--they all want to. It is good for every man, and it keeps us all
- together. Besides, it is only for a year. For a year it is very good.
- The Germans have three years--that is too long, that is bad.'
- I told him how the soldiers in Bavaria hated the military service.
- 'Yes,' he said, 'that is true of Germans. The system is different. Ours
- is much better; in Switzerland a man enjoys his time as a soldier. I
- want to go.'
- So we watched the black dots of soldiers crawling over the high snow,
- listened to the unnatural dry rattle of guns, up there.
- Then we were aware of somebody whistling, of soldiers yelling down the
- road. We were to come on, along the level, over the bridge. So we
- marched quickly forward, away from the slopes, towards the hotel, once a
- monastery, that stood in the distance. The light was blue and clear on
- the reedy lakes of this upper place; it was a strange desolation of
- water and bog and rocks and road, hedged by the snowy slopes round the
- rim, under the very sky.
- The soldier was yelling again. I could not tell what he said.
- 'He says if we don't run we can't come at all,' said Emil.
- 'I won't run,' I said.
- So we hurried forwards, over the bridge, where the soldier on guard was
- standing.
- 'Do you want to be shot?' he said angrily, as we came up.
- 'No, thanks,' I said.
- Emil was very serious.
- 'How long should we have had to wait if we hadn't got through now?' he
- asked the soldier, when we were safely out of danger.
- 'Till one o'clock,' was the reply.
- 'Two hours!' said Emil, strangely elated. 'We should have had to wait
- two hours before we could come on. He was riled that we didn't run,' and
- he laughed with glee.
- So we marched over the level to the hotel. We called in for a glass of
- hot milk. I asked in German. But the maid, a pert hussy, elegant and
- superior, was French. She served us with great contempt, as two
- worthless creatures, poverty-stricken. It abashed poor Emil, but we
- managed to laugh at her. This made her very angry. In the smoking-room
- she raised up her voice in French:
- '_Du lait chaud pour les chameaux._'
- 'Some hot milk for the camels, she says,' I translated for Emil. He was
- covered with confusion and youthful anger.
- But I called to her, tapped the table and called:
- '_Mademoiselle!_'
- She appeared flouncingly in the doorway.
- '_Encore du lait pour les chameaux_,' I said.
- And she whisked our glasses off the table, and flounced out without a
- word.
- But she would not come in again with the milk. A German girl brought it.
- We laughed, and she smiled primly.
- When we set forth again, Emil rolled up his sleeves and turned back his
- shirt from his neck and breast, to do the thing thoroughly. Besides, it
- was midday, and the sun was hot; and, with his bulky pack on his back,
- he suggested the camel of the French maid more than ever.
- We were on the downward slope. Only a short way from the hotel, and
- there was the drop, the great cleft in the mountains running down from
- this shallow pot among the peaks.
- The descent on the south side is much more precipitous and wonderful
- than the ascent from the north. On the south, the rocks are craggy and
- stupendous; the little river falls headlong down; it is not a stream, it
- is one broken, panting cascade far away in the gulley below, in
- the darkness.
- But on the slopes the sun pours in, the road winds down with its tail in
- its mouth, always in endless loops returning on itself. The mules that
- travel upward seem to be treading in a mill.
- Emil took the narrow tracks, and, like the water, we cascaded down,
- leaping from level to level, leaping, running, leaping, descending
- headlong, only resting now and again when we came down on to another
- level of the high-road.
- Having begun, we could not help ourselves, we were like two stones
- bouncing down. Emil was highly elated. He waved his thin, bare, white
- arms as he leapt, his chest grew pink with the exercise. Now he felt he
- was doing something that became a member of his Sportverein. Down we
- went, jumping, running, britching.
- It was wonderful on this south side, so sunny, with feathery trees and
- deep black shadows. It reminded me of Goethe, of the romantic period:
- _Kennst du das Land, wo die Citronen blühen?_
- So we went tumbling down into the south, very swiftly, along with the
- tumbling stream. But it was very tiring. We went at a great pace down
- the gully, between the sheer rocks. Trees grew in the ledges high over
- our heads, trees grew down below. And ever we descended.
- Till gradually the gully opened, then opened into a wide valley-head,
- and we saw Airolo away below us, the railway emerging from its hole, the
- whole valley like a cornucopia full of sunshine.
- Poor Emil was tired, more tired than I was. And his big boots had hurt
- his feet in the descent. So, having come to the open valley-head, we
- went more gently. He had become rather quiet.
- The head of the valley had that half-tamed, ancient aspect that reminded
- me of the Romans. I could only expect the Roman legions to be encamped
- down there; and the white goats feeding on the bushes belonged to a
- Roman camp.
- But no, we saw again the barracks of the Swiss soldiery, and again we
- were in the midst of rifle-fire and manoeuvres. But we went evenly,
- tired now, and hungry. We had nothing to eat.
- It is strange how different the sun-dried, ancient, southern slopes of
- the world are, from the northern slopes. It is as if the god Pan really
- had his home among these sun-bleached stones and tough, sun-dark trees.
- And one knows it all in one's blood, it is pure, sun-dried memory. So I
- was content, coming down into Airolo.
- We found the streets were Italian, the houses sunny outside and dark
- within, like Italy, there were laurels in the road. Poor Emil was a
- foreigner all at once. He rolled down his shirt sleeves and fastened his
- shirt-neck, put on his coat and collar, and became a foreigner in his
- soul, pale and strange.
- I saw a shop with vegetables and grapes, a real Italian shop, a dark
- cave.
- '_Quanto costa l'uva?_' were my first words in the south.
- '_Sessanta al chilo_,' said the girl.
- And it was as pleasant as a drink of wine, the Italian.
- So Emil and I ate the sweet black grapes as we went to the station.
- He was very poor. We went into the third-class restaurant at the
- station. He ordered beer and bread and sausage; I ordered soup and
- boiled beef and vegetables.
- They brought me a great quantity, so, whilst the girl was serving
- coffee-with-rum to the men at the bar, I took another spoon and knife
- and fork and plates for Emil, and we had two dinners from my one. When
- the girl--she was a woman of thirty-five--came back, she looked at us
- sharply. I smiled at her coaxingly; so she gave a small, kindly smile
- in reply.
- '_Ja, dies ist reizend_,' said Emil, _sotto voce_, exulting. He was very
- shy. But we were curiously happy, in that railway restaurant.
- Then we sat very still, on the platform, and waited for the train. It
- was like Italy, pleasant and social to wait in the railway station, all
- the world easy and warm in its activity, with the sun shining.
- I decided to take a franc's worth of train-journey. So I chose my
- station. It was one franc twenty, third class. Then my train came, and
- Emil and I parted, he waving to me till I was out of sight. I was sorry
- he had to go back, he did so want to venture forth.
- So I slid for a dozen miles or more, sleepily, down the Ticino valley,
- sitting opposite two fat priests in their feminine black.
- When I got out at my station I felt for the first time ill at ease. Why
- was I getting out at this wayside place, on to the great, raw high-road?
- I did not know. But I set off walking. It was nearly tea-time.
- Nothing in the world is more ghastly than these Italian roads, new,
- mechanical, belonging to a machine life. The old roads are wonderful,
- skilfully aiming their way. But these new great roads are desolating,
- more desolating than all the ruins in the world.
- I walked on and on, down the Ticino valley, towards Bellinzona. The
- valley was perhaps beautiful: I don't know. I can only remember the
- road. It was broad and new, and it ran very often beside the railway. It
- ran also by quarries and by occasional factories, also through villages.
- And the quality of its sordidness is something that does not bear
- thinking of, a quality that has entered Italian life now, if it was not
- there before.
- Here and there, where there were quarries or industries, great
- lodging-houses stood naked by the road, great, grey, desolate places;
- and squalid children were playing round the steps, and dirty men
- slouched in. Everything seemed under a weight.
- Down the road of the Ticino valley I felt again my terror of this new
- world which is coming into being on top of us. One always feels it in a
- suburb, on the edge of a town, where the land is being broken under the
- advance of houses. But this is nothing, in England, to the terror one
- feels on the new Italian roads, where these great blind cubes of
- dwellings rise stark from the destroyed earth, swarming with a sort of
- verminous life, really verminous, purely destructive.
- It seems to happen when the peasant suddenly leaves his home and becomes
- a workman. Then an entire change comes over everywhere. Life is now a
- matter of selling oneself to slave-work, building roads or labouring in
- quarries or mines or on the railways, purposeless, meaningless, really
- slave-work, each integer doing his mere labour, and all for no purpose,
- except to have money, and to get away from the old system.
- These Italian navvies work all day long, their whole life is engaged in
- the mere brute labour. And they are the navvies of the world. And whilst
- they are navvying, they are almost shockingly indifferent to their
- circumstances, merely callous to the dirt and foulness.
- It is as if the whole social form were breaking down, and the human
- element swarmed within the disintegration, like maggots in cheese. The
- roads, the railways are built, the mines and quarries are excavated, but
- the whole organism of life, the social organism, is slowly crumbling and
- caving in, in a kind of process of dry rot, most terrifying to see. So
- that it seems as though we should be left at last with a great system of
- roads and railways and industries, and a world of utter chaos seething
- upon these fabrications: as if we had created a steel framework, and the
- whole body of society were crumbling and rotting in between. It is most
- terrifying to realize; and I have always felt this terror upon a new
- Italian high-road--more there than anywhere.
- The remembrance of the Ticino valley is a sort of nightmare to me. But
- it was better when at last, in the darkness of night, I got into
- Bellinzona. In the midst of the town one felt the old organism still
- living. It is only at its extremities that it is falling to pieces, as
- in dry rot.
- In the morning, leaving Bellinzona, again I went in terror of the new,
- evil high-road, with its skirting of huge cubical houses and its
- seething navvy population. Only the peasants driving in with fruit were
- consoling. But I was afraid of them: the same spirit had set in in them.
- I was no longer happy in Switzerland, not even when I was eating great
- blackberries and looking down at the Lago Maggiore, at Locarno, lying by
- the lake; the terror of the callous, disintegrating process was too
- strong in me.
- At a little inn a man was very good to me. He went into his garden and
- fetched me the first grapes and apples and peaches, bringing them in
- amongst leaves, and heaping them before me. He was Italian-Swiss; he had
- been in a bank in Bern; now he had retired, had bought his paternal
- home, and was a free man. He was about fifty years old; he spent all his
- time in his garden; his daughter attended to the inn.
- He talked to me, as long as I stayed, about Italy and Switzerland and
- work and life. He was retired, he was free. But he was only nominally
- free. He had only achieved freedom from labour. He knew that the system
- he had escaped at last, persisted, and would consume his sons and his
- grandchildren. He himself had more or less escaped back to the old form;
- but as he came with me on to the hillside, looking down the high-road at
- Lugano in the distance, he knew that his old order was collapsing by a
- slow process of disintegration.
- Why did he talk to me as if I had any hope, as if I represented any
- positive truth as against this great negative truth that was advancing
- up the hill-side. Again I was afraid. I hastened down the high-road,
- past the houses, the grey, raw crystals of corruption.
- I saw a girl with handsome bare legs, ankles shining like brass in the
- sun. She was working in a field, on the edge of a vineyard. I stopped to
- look at her, suddenly fascinated by her handsome naked flesh that shone
- like brass.
- Then she called out to me, in a jargon I could not understand, something
- mocking and challenging. And her voice was raucous and challenging; I
- went on, afraid.
- In Lugano I stayed at a German hotel. I remember sitting on a seat in
- the darkness by the lake, watching the stream of promenaders patrolling
- the edge of the water, under the trees and the lamps. I can still see
- many of their faces: English, German, Italian, French. And it seemed
- here, here in this holiday-place, was the quick of the disintegration,
- the dry-rot, in this dry, friable flux of people backwards and forwards
- on the edge of the lake, men and women from the big hotels, in evening
- dress, curiously sinister, and ordinary visitors, and tourists, and
- workmen, youths, men of the town, laughing, jeering. It was curiously
- and painfully sinister, almost obscene.
- I sat a long time among them, thinking of the girl with her limbs of
- glowing brass. Then at last I went up to the hotel, and sat in the
- lounge looking at the papers. It was the same here as down below, though
- not so intense, the feeling of horror.
- So I went to bed. The hotel was on the edge of a steep declivity. I
- wondered why the whole hills did not slide down, in some great natural
- catastrophe.
- In the morning I walked along the side of the Lake of Lugano, to where I
- could take a steamer to ferry me down to the end. The lake is not
- beautiful, only picturesque. I liked most to think of the Romans
- coming to it.
- So I steamed down to the lower end of the water. When I landed and went
- along by a sort of railway I saw a group of men. Suddenly they began to
- whoop and shout. They were hanging on to an immense pale bullock, which
- was slung up to be shod; and it was lunging and kicking with terrible
- energy. It was strange to see that mass of pale, soft-looking flesh
- working with such violent frenzy, convulsed with violent, active frenzy,
- whilst men and women hung on to it with ropes, hung on and weighed it
- down. But again it scattered some of them in its terrible convulsion.
- Human beings scattered into the road, the whole place was covered with
- hot dung. And when the bullock began to lunge again, the men set up a
- howl, half of triumph, half of derision.
- I went on, not wanting to see. I went along a very dusty road. But it
- was not so terrifying, this road. Perhaps it was older.
- In dreary little Chiasso I drank coffee, and watched the come and go
- through the Customs. The Swiss and the Italian Customs officials had
- their offices within a few yards of each other, and everybody must stop.
- I went in and showed my rucksack to the Italian, then I mounted a tram,
- and went to the Lake of Como.
- In the tram were dressed-up women, fashionable, but business-like. They
- had come by train to Chiasso, or else had been shopping in the town.
- When we came to the terminus a young miss, dismounting before me, left
- behind her parasol. I had been conscious of my dusty, grimy appearance
- as I sat in the tram, I knew they thought me a workman on the roads.
- However, I forgot that when it was time to dismount.
- '_Pardon, Mademoiselle_,' I said to the young miss. She turned and
- withered me with a rather overdone contempt--'_bourgeoise_,' I said to
- myself, as I looked at her--'_Vous avez laissé votre parasol_.'
- She turned, and with a rapacious movement darted upon her parasol. How
- her soul was in her possessions! I stood and watched her. Then she went
- into the road and under the trees, haughty, a demoiselle. She had on
- white kid boots.
- I thought of the Lake of Como what I had thought of Lugano: it must have
- been wonderful when the Romans came there. Now it is all villas. I think
- only the sunrise is still wonderful, sometimes.
- I took the steamer down to Como, and slept in a vast old stone cavern of
- an inn, a remarkable place, with rather nice people. In the morning I
- went out. The peace and the bygone beauty of the cathedral created the
- glow of the great past. And in the market-place they were selling
- chestnuts wholesale, great heaps of bright, brown chestnuts, and sacks
- of chestnuts, and peasants very eager selling and buying. I thought of
- Como, it must have been wonderful even a hundred years ago. Now it is
- cosmopolitan, the cathedral is like a relic, a museum object, everywhere
- stinks of mechanical money-pleasure. I dared not risk walking to Milan:
- I took a train. And there, in Milan, sitting in the Cathedral Square, on
- Saturday afternoon, drinking Bitter Campari and watching the swarm of
- Italian city-men drink and talk vivaciously, I saw that here the life
- was still vivid, here the process of disintegration was vigorous, and
- centred in a multiplicity of mechanical activities that engage the human
- mind as well as the body. But always there was the same purpose stinking
- in it all, the mechanizing, the perfect mechanizing of human life.
- End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Twilight in Italy, by D. H. Lawrence
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